havent blogged in a log time so this is whats on my mind

we all have things that we want and need in our life time but we cant get anywhere if our minds are filled with clutter and hopes that never will really come about. i stress about things that i shouldn't. afraid of losing the few people i have left that i can stand. and i know that by protecting people its how u lose them. it makes no sense in my mind the things that i sit and ponder about i afraid of the future because i don't want to fail miserably at something i want to go so greatly but i guess that's why we all try and if we sit around fearing things they will never change and they will always be just as horrible and maybe even worse. i guess every one does it and try to find ways to make changes but me and myself just hope those changes will come by naturally knowing that they will not . i fear that if i don't change and get my cluttered mind together i will never find the things that i enjoy in life i need to change for myself and find that things have a better meaning well i know every thing has a meaning i just see the ones that i want and block everything else out im finding i do that now often block things out there's a reason for it but right now im not to sure what it is. it seems as if every one around me is starting to find what they want to do with the rest of there life's and i just sit and day dream it changes every day none seem to appear to me more then the next. maybe its because i want every thing and i want to do everything. maybe thats why i am changing so much? i find my self often not as happy or as good of a person that i use to be and it makes no sense how nothing seems as if it has been changing but when i look back nothing is the same.
 

¹Oh my God, I have the remedy for love
I struck the glass
It broke the bones inside my fist but I'm okay

I cannot change you, you'll never change
I never would expect to break this in the end

Something so profound, something you won't expect
take this scripture like a picture and wear it around your neck
the sky it opens up
don't get swallowed by the flames
what's mine is yours and yours is mine so take me away

you hear the sounds, they're carried out
there's no sympathy for the dead
it swells and I, was never the same
there's no sympathy for the dead
we dance like zombies do in the middle of the rain
we see the stones falling from the sky (on fire)
the blinding light beaming from your eyes (are desire)
life has died, yet we're still alive and down below
a sea of damned crashing like a tidal wave


I can't breathe
wake up from this nightmare that I'm in
dive into a holy river and wash away my sins
as I reach (sanctified) the surface of the water now
I will breathe and burn out my eyes

you hear the sounds, they're carried out
there's no sympathy for the dead
it swells and I, was never the same
there's no sympathy for the dead
we dance like zombies do in the middle of the rain
we see the stones falling from the sky (on fire)
the blinding light beaming from your eyes (our desire)
life has died, yet we're still alive and down below
a sea of damned crashing like a tidal wave

So take the medicines to quench the pain we have
and walk until the end, until you've reached the sand

a hundred thousand wings, soaring through the sky
at intense speeds, we can't catch with our eyes
you hear the sounds of a third carried out
just wait (just wait)
you hesitate

I have the remedy to this poisonous kiss
I struck the glass, it shatters bones in my fist
I have the remedy to this poisonous kiss
I struck the glass, it shatters bones in my fist
I have the remedy to this poisonous kiss
I struck the glass, it shatters bones in my fist
I have the remedy to this poisonous kiss
I struck the glass, it shatters bones in my fist
im really bored so i decied to put this song in here becouse i can i will start wrighting un point less blogs i think lol do you think i should?

so you know how in my last blog i was pissed off at my dad?

well this weekend i took ur guys advice and told him how i feel i made him cry(wossy) but at least i told him. ifeel lifted and i dont think things will change but im still happy tht i finally told him.i took alot for me to find it in my self i dont know why becouse usally i can tell people but o well bc i got it out and now he knows i think hes a dick!!!

i dont know whats happened over these last to weeks but all i know is i lost every thing that ive ever had  and now im just going to sit at home all daay and cry untilo  i cant fucking stand it any more

bord out of my fucking mind i need somethng fun to do god this sucks!! but n e ways woo hoo yeah told u i was bord and its cold as hell in this house  well im going to go mess with my profile