Answer each question with exactly three words


1. Where is your cell phone? To my left.
2. Your girlfriend/boyfriend/wife? Super awesome lady.
3. Your hair? Slowly going away.
4. Where is your father? In Las Vegas.
5. Cheesecake? In the freezer.
6. Your favorite thing to do? Daddy/daughter day.
7. Your dream last night? Shitty work dream.
8. Your favorite drink? Cold Gatorade Frost.
9. Your dream car? Green Hemi Cuda
10. The room you're in? Computer slash dining.
11. George Bush? In too long.
12. You fears? The supid dentist.
13. Nipple Rings? Not on me.
14. Who did you hang out with last night? Alice and Jaime.
15. What aren't you good at? Math and bills.
16. Muffins? Sure. Sounds good.
17. Where did you grow up? In Alexandria, MN.
18. One of your wish list items? New Honda Element.
19. The last thing you did? Call of Duty.
20. What are you wearing? Shorts and shirt.
21. Your pet? Two lazy cats.
22. Tattoo? No, not yet.
23. Your computer? Awesome Intel iMac.
24. Your life? Happy, very busy.
25. Your mood? Tired and lazy.
26. Missing? Uh, say what?
27. What are you thinking about right now? Next dentist visit.
28. Your car? Shitty Hyundai Elantre.
29. Your work? Art Director/Freelance
30. Your summer? Went too fast.
31. Your relationship status? Very happily married.
32. Your favorite colour(s)? Red, black, yellow.
33. When is the last time you laughed? At the park.
34. Last time you cried? Few months ago.
35. School? Out 10 years.

1. Elaborate on your default photo.
Taken by myself to show a pal that I was wearing the shirt he designed...back when we lived in Missippi.

2. What's your current relationship status?
Married with child.

3. Ever have a near-death experience?
Hmmm. Probably not REAL near-death experiences, but I've felt pretty lucky a few times.

4. Name an obvious quality you have.
I'm a good friend.

5. What's the name of the song that's stuck in your head right now?
"Here we go again" by Ok Go

6. Name a celebrity you would marry:
Bobby Flay. It would be a fantastic gay marriage filled with grilled food all the time.

7. Who will cut and paste this first?
I doubt anyone will read this.

8. Has anyone ever said you look like a celebrity?
I've heard both Jack Black and Chris Farley. So, I'm fat. Get it?!

9. Do you wear a watch? What kind?
My watch is broken right now, so right now, no.

10. Do you have anything pierced?
No.

11. Do you have any tattoos?
No.

12. Do you like pain?
No.

13. Do you like to shop?
I could spend all day in a CD, DVD or comic shop.

14. What was the last thing you paid for with cash?
2 tacos and a bean burrito for dinner last night.

15. What was the last thing you paid for with your credit card?
Stuff from Target...contact solution, toilet paper, gatorade, etc...

16. Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone?
Amy Jo.

17. What is on your desktop background?
Some cool picture of rocks and sea. I usally don't go for pics like that, but it looked nice on my new widescreen computer, so I went for it.

18. What is the background on your cell phone?
Blank.

19. Do you like redheads?
Yes?

20. Do you know any twins?
Nope.

21. Do you have any weird relatives?
Nothing out of the ordinary.

22. What was the last movie you watched?
DeathRace 2000.

23. What was the last book you read?
Some X-Men graphic novel. That's about as high-brow as I get.

W H O W A S T H E L A S T P E R S O N T H A T?

1. You hung out with?: My sister Carrie just came over.
2. Rode in a car with?: Jaime and Alice
3. Went to the movies with?: Jaime (Ricky Bobby last Thursday)
4. You went to the mall with?: ...?
5. You went to dinner with?: Jaime on our Anniversary (Benihana)
6. Talk on the phone to?: Justin
7. Made you laugh?: Alice

W O U L D Y O U R A T H E R?

1. Pierce your nose or tongue?: If I HAD to, nose
2. Be serious or be funny?: Funny
3. Drink whole or skim milk?: Skim
4. Die in a fire or drown?: Drown
5. Spend time with your parents or enemies?: Parents

Y O U P R E F E R

1. Flowers or candy? Candy
2. Grey or black?: Black
3. Color or Black and white photos?: B&W
4. Lust or love?: Love
5. Sunrise or sunset?: Sunset
6. M&Ms or Skittles?: Peanut M&Ms
7. Staying up late or waking up early?: Up early. But I gotta be in a 'mood.'

A N S W E R T R U T H F U L L Y

1. Do you like anyone?: Uh... (slowly realizes this quiz may be for 12 year olds...)
2. Who?: Jaime and Alice
3. Do they know it?: Jaime knows. Alice will figure it out.
4. Are you together?: Fo evah.

D O Y O U P R E F E R.

1. Sun or Moon? Moon
2. Winter or Fall? Fall
3. Left or Right? Right
4. 10 acquaintances or two best friends? 2 Best Friends
5. Sunny and humid or rainy and cold? Rainy and Cold
6. Vanilla ice cream or chocolate ice cream? Vanilla

A B O U T Y O U!

1. What time is it?: 11:25 p.m.
2. First and middle Name?: Lon Alan
3. What do you want?: For the new season of LOST to start.
4. Where do you want to live?: Buy a house in Minneapolis someday.
5. How many kids do you want?: One more would be good.
6. You want to get married?: I'd like to STAY married.
7. Are you double jointed?: No
9. Can you cross your eyes?: A bit
10. Do you make your bed daily?: Nope

IN T H E L A S T M O N T H H A V E Y O U ?

1. Bought something: Yes
2. Sang: Yup
3. Been hugged: Yes
4. Felt stupid: Sure
5. Missed someone: 8 hours a day, five days a week.
6. Danced crazy: Yes.
7. Gotten your hair cut: Yes, but it was a rare occasion.
8. Been kissed: Yup.

---------------------

1. I am listening to: TV
2. Maybe I should: Be sleeping
3. I love: Jaime and Alice
4. My best friend: Justin
5. I don't understand: Sudoku
6. I lose: my belt.
8. People say I: should stop blogging on myspace.
9. The meaning of my user name is: a stupid nickname carried over from college.
10. Love is: a smile from Alice. A kiss from Jaime.
11. Somewhere, someone is: listening to Korn.
12. I will always end up: right where I am.
13. Forever seems: like it could really exist.
14. I never want to: be a zombie.
15. My cell phone: has a skull sticker on it.
16. When I wake up in the morning: i have to pee.
17. I get annoyed when: i think about work.
18. Parties are: for kids.
19. My dog is: actually a cat.
20. Kisses are the worst when: you're tired.
21. Today I: didn't get anything accomplished.
22. Tonight I will: sleep, if Alice lets me.
23. Tomorrow I will: go to Elk River.

Eye Color: Blue

Hair Color: Brown

Height: 5'7"

Favorite Color: Red

Screen Name: Unitus

Favorite Band: Ramones, Rocket From the Crypt

Favorite Movie: Star Wars IV

Favorite Show: LOST

Your Car: Hyundai Elantra

Your Hometown: Alexandria, MN

Your Present Town: Minneapolis, MN

Your Style: Krumpin' and Klownin'

* . . Have You Ever . . *

Sat on your rooftop? Not at this house.

Kissed someone in the rain? Yes.

Danced in a public place? Yup.

Smiled for no reason? All the time. (I'm special)

Laughed so hard you cried? Yes.

Peed your pants after age 8? No.

Written a song? Several.

Sang to someone for no reason? Yes.

Performed on a stage? Yup.

Talked to someone you don't know? I try to avoid it, but yes.

Gone out of your way to befriend someone? Not really.

Made out in a theatre? Hmmm. No. I don't think so.

Gone roller skating since 8th grade? Yes.

Been in love? Yup.

* . . Who was the last person to . . *

Say HI to you? My sister.

Tell you, I love you? My Dad.

Kiss you? My wife.

Hug you? My wife.

Tell you BYE? My sister.

Take your photo? My sister.

Call your cell phone? My folks.

Buy you something? My sister.

Go with you to the movies? My wife.

Sing to you? My wife.

Write a poem about you? My wife? Maybe?

Text message you? My sister.

Touch you? My wife.

* . . What's the last . . *

Time you laughed? Today.

Time you cried? Couple days ago. Nothing major. Just some crap on TV or something.

Movie you watched? Commando.

Joke you told? Hmmmm. ???

Song you've sang? Some song from the Sound of Music.

Time you've looked at the clock? Hour ago.

Drink you've had? Diet Mountain Dew.

Number you've dialed? My folks.

Book you've read? In the middle of Black Hole.

Food you've eaten? Pizza.

Flavor of gum chewed? Dunno.

Shoes you've worn? Black low-top Cons.

Store you've been in? Wal-Mart.


* . . Can You . . *

Write with both hands? Yes, but not super good with my left.

Whistle? Yes.

Blow a bubble? Yes.

Roll your tounge in a circle? Yes.

Cross your eyes? Kinda, but not really.

Touch your tounge to your nose? No.

Dance? Kind of.

Gleek? Not on purpose.

Stay up a whole night without sleep? Nope.

Speak a different language? Yes, but not fluently.

Impersonate someone? Yes.

Prank call people? I can, but I don't (often).

Make a card pyramid? Yes.

Cook anything? You bet.

* . . Finish The Line . . *

If i were a ... Rich man, deedle diedle doodle deedle doodle doo.

I wish ... winning the lottery wasn't such a long-shot.

So many people don't know that ... Freaks and Geeks is an amazing show.

I am ... excited for the arrival of our daughter.

My heart is ... pumping blood throughout my body. (I hope)

1. ONE OF YOUR SCARS, HOW DID YOU GET IT? middle school. a girl with big fingernails dug 'em into my hand. 2. WHAT IS ON THE WALLS IN YOUR ROOM? yellow paint and a calendar. we need to put more shit up. 3. WHAT DOES YOUR CELL PHONE LOOK LIKE? cheapest nokia around. with a connor skull sticker on it. 4. WHAT MUSIC DO YOU LIKE TO LISTEN TO? peep the profile. 5. DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME YOU WERE BORN? in the morning, i think. 6. WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING RIGHT NOW? to not be busy. 7. WHAT DO YOU MISS? college. my band. 8. WHAT IS YOUR MOST PRIZED POSSESSION? hmmmm. i dunno. i have a lot of cool stuff. 9. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SMELL? jaime. 10. DO YOU GET CLAUSTROPHOBIC? no. 11. DO YOU GET SCARED IN THE DARK? sometimes. 13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE COLOGNE / PERFUME? dunno. don't wear it. hey, what happened to ..12? 14. WHAT KIND OF HAIR DO YOU LIKE ON THE OPPOSITE SEX? straight. 15. WHERE CAN YOU SEE YOURSELF PROPOSING AT? already did. jackson square in new orleans. 16. COFFEE OR ENERGY DRINKS? neither. pop, iced tea or water. 17. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIZZA TOPPING? canadian bacon. 18. IF YOU CAN EAT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE? nachos? i think i might have a plate. 19. WHO IS THE LAST PERSON YOU MADE MAD i think my sister did in the car today. 20. DO YOU SPEAK A DIFFERENT LANGUAGE? i can get by with french. a little spanish. a little chinese. 21. WHAT WAS THE FIRST GIFT SOMEONE EVER GAVE YOU (OF THE OPPOSITE SEX) don't remember. 28. WOULD YOU FALL IN LOVE KNOWING THAT THE PERSON IS LEAVING? weird question. leaving where? 29. WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO TELL SOMEONE HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO YOU? with your actions. 30. SAY A NUMBER FROM ONE TO A HUNDRED. 42. 31. BLONDES OR BRUNETTES? brunettes. all the way. 32. WHAT IS THE ONE NUMBER YOU CALL OFTEN? ..2 on my cell. that's jaime. 33. WHAT ANNOYS YOU MOST? lately, drivers and people in the stores up in my shit. xmas shopping is the worst. 34. HAVE YOU BEEN OUT OF THE US? Canada, the Netherlands, France 35. YOUR WEAKNESSES? dvds. 36. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Minneapolis, MN. 37. FIRST JOB? paperboy for the Star Tribune. 38. EVER DONE A PRANK CALL? yup. 39. WHAT WERE YOU DOING BEFORE YOU FILLED OUT THIS SURVEY? putting stacks of paper away. i should be laying out button designs now. 40.IF YOU COULD GET PLASTIC SURGERY WHAT WOULD IT BE? some sort of "fat suction" 41. WHY DID YOU FILL OUT THIS SURVEY? i like surveys. i'm super blog-ghey that way. 42. WHAT DO YOU GET COMPLIMENTED ABOUT MOST? my artwork, i suppose. 43. WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF ALCOHOL WAS OUTLAWED? meh. i'm not too attached to it. a good beer is great every now and then, but nothing beats a squirt. 44. WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY? a truck. 45. HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU WANT? 2. boy and girl, if possible. 46. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? my dad. who was named after Lon Cheney Sr. 47. DO YOU WISH ON STARS? if i see a falling one. 48. WHICH FINGER[S] IS YOUR FAVORITE? pointer. it does all the picking. 49. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY? watching tv last week. i'm a wuss. 50. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? yup. 51. Whats your favorite lunch meat? ham? 52. ANY BAD HABITS? sure. 53. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING CD ON THE SHELF? i have that CD Jessee Camp put out. it was a gag gift. 54. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? i think so. 55. HAVE YOU EVER TOLD A SECRET YOU SWORE NOT TO TELL? i'm sure. 56. DO LOOKS MATTER? ultimately, yeah. 57. HOW DO YOU RELEASE ANGER? make everyone around me uneasy. 58. WHERE IS YOUR SECOND HOME? the studio? 59. DO YOU TRUST OTHERS EASILY? yeah. probably a character flaw. 60. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD? star wars figures, or the coleco vision. 61. HOW MANY NUMBERS ARE IN YOUR CELL PHONE? quite a few. 63. DO YOU USE SARCASM? uh. yes. 64. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN A MOSH PIT? yes. ah, youth. 65. WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A GUY/GIRL? sausages? 66. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES? Lonny. Unitus. Fuckface. 68. DO YOU UN-TIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? nope. 70. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR? cookie dough. or sweet cream with rasperries. 72. WHAT ARE YOUR FAVORITE COLORS? green. red. 73. HOW MANY WISDOM TEETH DO YOU HAVE? nada. 75. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS? who? 76. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? Conan O'Brian's on in the living room. 77. LAST THING YOU ATE? Gummi Worms. 78. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? Amy Jo. 79. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE IN THE OPPOSITE SEX Eyes or butt. Depends on if they're coming or going. 82. FAVORITE DRINK? Squirt. 84. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SPORT? football. 85. HAIR COLOR? brown. 86. EYE COLOR? blue. 87. DO YOU WEAR GLASSES? sometimes. 88. SIBLINGS? just one. 89. FAVORITE MONTH? may. 90. YOU LIKE SUSHI? i would imagine i don't. 91. LAST THING YOU WATCHED? the biggest loser finale, while printing. 93. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT? nope. 94. SUMMER OR WINTER? Summer 95. KISSES OR HUGS? both, at the same time. EXTREME! 96. RELATIONSHIPS OR ONE NIGHT STANDS? relationships 97. WHO IS THE MOST LIKELY TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS? Jesus. 98. WHO IS THE LEAST LIKELY TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS? Larry. 99. WHAT BOOKS ARE YOU READING? who has time to read? 100. WHERE DO YOU WORK? minnetonka. jelous?

1. My uncle once: shot a timberwolf. 2. Never in my life: have i jumped out of an airplane. 3. The one person who can drive me nuts, but then can always manage to make me smile: sleeps in the same bed as me. 4. High School was: the worst. 6. My first real love was: jaime. 7. If I were to get married right now my bridesmaids/groomsmen would be: covered in corpse paint. 8. I talk to my ex’s: never. 9. When I was 5: i don't remember. 10. Last Christmas I: broke my nephew's new Yugi Oh toy. and i felt like a dork. 11. When I turn my head left, I see: jaime, on the couch, watching 'joe dirt.' 12. When I turn my head right, I see: a table with a mountain of crap on it. 13. The craziest Family Event was: road trip with my dad's side aunts and uncles. throwing up a chicken mcnugget and strawberry shake happy meal in the back of a van. 14. If I was a character on Friends I’d be: ?? don't watch it. 15. By this time next year: i will own a house? have a child? 16. My favorite Aunt is: susan. 17. I have a hard time understanding: klingon. 18. One time at a family gathering: i did karaoke of "independant woman" with some cousins. 19. You know I "like" you if: i make fun of you or i talk to you. 20. If I won an award, the first person (people) I’d thank is: it would depend on what the award was for. i'd probably thank jaime no matter what. 21. Take my advice: never go to bed angry. 22. My ideal breakfast is: bacon, eggs over medium and a big corn-pancake from Maria's. 23. If you visit my hometown: visit the giant viking "Big Ole." 24. If you spend the night at my house: you'll be on the futon in the room with the catbox. 25. I’d stop my wedding if: huh? 26. The world couldn’t do without: gummi bears. 27. I’d rather lick the belly of a cockroach than: change a diaper. 28. My favorite blonde is: my sister. she's a good helper. 29. Paper clips are more useful than: staple removers. 30. If I do anything well, it is: procrastinate...like..right now. 31. And by the way: i really should be drawing. 32. The last time I was high: i was just pretending. 33. The animals I would like to see flying besides birds are: sharks. 34. I shouldn’t be: not drawing right now. 35. Once, at a bar: i made out with jaime. 36. Last night: i did a quick stop at an art opening i was part of, then came home to work on stuff. 37. There’s this girl I know who: who makes cool books. 38. A better name for me would be: stinky. 39. If I ever go back to school I’ll: take some design classes. i never have, and they (might) help. oh, i could use some html or flash stuff too. 40. Next time I go to church: it'll be for someone's wedding. 41. How many days until my birthday?: too many.

1. Initials: laj 2. Name someone with the same birthday as you: james brown 3. Who was your first love? debbie harry 4. Are you homophobic? no 5. Are you bisexual? no 6. Do you believe in God? yup, but not the bible 7. How many U.S states have you been to?: half? 8. How many of the U.S states have you lived in? 5: minnesota, illinois, north dakota, tennesse, mississippi 9. Have you ever lived outside the U.S? france for a week 10. Name something you like physically about yourself. eyes 11. Name something non-physical you like about yourself. i'm an excellent driver 12. Do you like poop? nope 13. What is your dream car? hmmm. not a dream car, but i think my next car will be a honda element 14. If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go? tokyo or syndey. 15. Have you ever had someone of the opposite sex over at your house? of course 16. Do you download music? not often 17. How many illegal things have you done? few 18. Where would you want to go on a first date? movies. i like movies. 19. Would you date the person who posted this before you? i'm married 20. Has anyone ever sang or played a song for you personally? no 21. Ever been kissed under fireworks?: yup 22. Do you like president Bush?: nope 23. Have you ever bungee jumped?: no 24. Have you ever white-water rafted?: no 25. Has anyone more than 10 years older than you hit on you? i don't think so 26. Have you met a real redneck?: of course 27. What song are you listening to right now? nothing 28. What is your current favorite song?: cons and tricks by willowz 29. What was the last movie you watched?: oldboy 30. Where was the last place you went besides your house?: my studio. yesterday. 31. Have you ever seriously vandalized someone elses property? kicked a friends car in high-school, after she kicked me in the nuts 32. Have you ever hit someone of the opposite sex?: yes. my sister. 33. Whats the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?: eyes or ass. depends if they're coming or going 34. What really turns you on? my wife 35. What do you usually order from starbucks?: i hate coffee. but i think their iced tea was okay 36. Say something totally random about yourself: i sang stairway to heaven on the phone the other day with a pal from fargo 37. Do you have an i-pod? yup 39. Do you have braces?: no, but i need them 40. Are you comfortable with your height? yeah 41. When do you know its love? yup 42. Do you speak any other languages besides English?: a little french, a little spanish 43. What kind of alcohol do you enjoy while out?: domestic beer 44. What magazines do you read?: entertainment weekly, wired 45. Have you ever ridden in a limo? yes 46. Has anyone you were really close to passed away? my grandma when i was young. none recently 47. Do you watch MTV? not often. it's pretty terrible. 48. What's something that really annoys you? work. 49. What's something you really like? dvds. 50. Do you like Michael Jackson? not anymore. 51. Can you dance? not really. like "stupid dance" yeah. 52. Have you ever surfed? no 53. Do you know how to pump gas? of course. 54. Do you drive? only to work, then home. and if i want to go anywhere. 55. What's the latest you have ever stayed out? i'm always in bed by 7 56. Have you ever thought that you were honestly going to die? yes 57. Were you ever rushed by an ambulance into the emergency room? not by an ambulance 58. Have you ever been dared to do something you didn't want to do? probably 59. Did you enjoy this survey? wasn't terrible...wasted five minutes...i should be working. stupid my space.

Wow. Stopped by a Hot Topic shop today to look at stickers and stuff, and stumbled across a Slipknot hoodie I designed about a year ago for the band! Peep the design here. So, if you want some wearable Unitus art, get out of the house for a change and slip on some Slipknot. Here's a pic with a Hot Topic model:

Got a few things coming up in the near future. First, I'll be hanging the FUEL screenprinted art show this Saturday with Steve from Squad 19. That show opens on November 18, and you can read all sorts of other details here. My piece in the show celebrates my love for CornNuts. Sets of the prints will be available at the show. Also, my wife J-Me and my good friend Amy Jo and I all will have booths at the No Coast Craft Fair on Saturday, December 3rd. No Coast is gearing itself to a young, "hip" crowd of crafty folks, so hopefully I'll get rid of some posters. And, speaking of posters, my latest print for a November 19th Stnnng show at the 7th Street Entry will be available at the show for $5. So, if you're in downtown Minneapolis around noon, and want a sandwich and some awesome rock...and a cheap poster, swing on by.