http://tinychat.com/l3iph

See me @ http://tinychat.com/l3iph

maybe.

I want to much. I am bored with society. I am over the traffic. Everything seems to bland very very stale. Much like 3 month old Wonder Bread. Meaning...I am just over a lot of things. There is underlying perception.That somewhere, somehow there was a notion, that I should give a fuck. And sad to say. I do not. I used to care. But the recession, the music, the stupid ass word swag. Has me throwing up in my mouth. Everyday. I used to sit around and wait for answers and solutions. I no longer even care to know where it lies, when you go around searching for answers. You usually get a combination of excuses. Which in turn is still a damn lie. Honestly. I been struggling with myself for a long time to find that common ground that we call sanity, just to find out. I know not one sane person. Outwards appearances may suggest so. I think not. "Forgive us father, we know not we do.." Seems so true. Staring into the faces of strangers and them staring back at you, every one is still looking to see. What THEY can seek. Few are looking to see where they catch sight(ings). At this point it seems, safer, smarter, cooler, to turn all the way to left. And leave the bullshit right in the middle where it belongs. I am deadly almost SICK of rappers and models and whirly twirly shit. That makes 0 sense in the end, behind that Goddess Remy, and his rich-man, poor man 'Japanese Denim' It still amounts to 0. Do with it what you please. Just know that the things you want you do not DESERVE. So when I see you. With your atlpics.com ass. I will ever so gently slap the DOG shit out of you and remind you that. In  the real world. Blood is still pumping thru my veins. I still will be stroking these keys. And dancing to the beat.......
of my own drum.

there is a part deux.
deux for the dumb motherfuckers is 2.

now with no shoes on. kick rocks.

Hmmm...
What makes another person look at a picture and say...I think I am going to STEAL her pictures. It baffles me. I would never want to take on someone's life, mine is confusing as it is. I mean there are thousands maybe even millions of ugly fuckers tilting their heads to the side to make awesome pictures.I mean really. When you go to the house for the booty call and you look like Becky Buckwild and you been using Some Big Booty Black Chicks pictures, you might get a silver bullet in your ass. You can download photoshop and look like Janet Jackson. I mean. With all this technology....And for the simple fact JUST live your own damn life. Use your own pictures. If you need help I WILL fix them up for you. What is even more crazier is when they make fake friends too. I was browsing being bored came across this girls Myspace then I went to her albums. Okay, you only have 1 picture of yourself. and 39 of friends and family? Like, This model I know. She stole her picture and said that was her best friend Lisa. Her name is Kristie. Look how simple minded these bitches are. It is like playing Barbies, all over again hmm.... Imagine that.

hmm.

yes its that time again. Time to blog, get some random shit off my cootie cat. SO who is the spokesperson for all these panty'n'bra flick taking heffa's for the 09? I was thinking I could reach out and touch someone. Maybe even....Put some rouge on someone. What the hell, I only see progression from that point on but seriously.
I find it rather annoying every ONE is a model. I tried it, don't really have time to do the Wheat Thins diet, so I left that shit for someone who wanted it. I got tired of all the crazy shit, bullshit, and waste of time I went thru. Now that I know something. vs knowing nothing. I could mos def handled it if I ever decided to rock that way again. Which I don't see. But I don't know SO who's to say? But.
I think.
we might
be giving ------------ not we (OTHER PEOPLE) might be giving these ladies false hopes. I mean really. Its JUST not for everyone. Like other professions I cannot be a nurse. Cause I hate being in hospitals unless someone is dying or near death. Ekk. Sounds bad huh. Well its true. I hate that EVERY CHICK ON MYSPACE HAS there a cup titties out with some bootleg ass graphic blinking, and something above it that says [[*MISSsexXy*224534534 hits Worldwide ]]blah blah blah. It is truly a sight for sore eyes. IF you are NOT doing the following you should stick to working in the deli section @ Publix =)
-Washing Your Ass
- Taking Care of Your Children
- Have A Diploma
- Planning on Having A Plan
It seems pretty pointless to me. This is MY personal opinion keep in mind. If I offended you. Switch your game up and apply these things to making you better. I spent the past 2 years of my life being on some bullshit. I'm OVER it. I want progression, I want change, I want the SUCCESS I know I deserve. And its been way overdue to see this. But I have and I am blessed for that fact. I am sure no one will read this blog cept for my cool cup of mojo Juicy J. I started to put people on blast but the pictures are too depressing. I like to read my blogs from time to time. SO I will not put myself thru that.

You know, before I got the idea to blog about this my inital thoughts were not to do so. I fought and played with the idea because I did not want to come off seeming to fit the "typical" judgment that will pass then I got the thinking about it....I don't really give to hot piping shits. People keep wanting to dictate and have some say so over what a person should think or do. I have news. Folks are going to do whatever it is that they want to do regardless. These limits and ideals you HAVE about how one should live their life, is simply just an idea or a thought. Its not a reality in that person's eyes if they haven't reached that point in their lives. So your gonna beat them in the head with something until you GET that satisfaction of finding out. They are gonna just do what they want any damn ways. What a waste of time, all the time you wasted on focusing energy into someone now you are still in the same position that you were in a year ago or a month ago. What anyone needs to install or get others to understand is progression. That is the key. I can promise some that someone will appreciate advice that goes a long way vs chastising someone. Especially adults. This goes to show a lot of things about how society clouds someones judgment. I think I could have been a lot further in life if I would have pay attention and done what was neccessary to be a better me, instead of waiting around for an answer that I could only get with time, trial, and error. I am learning, and I am making mistakes all the time I do not mean to I do not go out looking for trouble. I learn and listen to the things around me. And I know for certain that by worrying about the next person and focusing energy on outside things, and people gets me no where. I have done it for the past two years. And I am so over giving my all to be in the same place. Its pointless. I love everyone so hard and so much that I let their pain, their troubles and worries by my problem and to a point I care but I cannot change these things. I cannot keep trying to save the day with no damn cape or superpowers

Going into the club. I was so pretty so fly, leaving I was hot n sweaty and ready to leave 45mins later. Geez. does it really have to be so hot to where my wig is slipping off?? So from there to the stripclub, and some big booty on my lap cannot remember her face at all, fruity patron and now i am drinking on day old chardonnay. Proud of myself I can say truly can say accomplish the whole factor of getting fucked of and being chill. a r e y o u j e a l o u s ? lmao! It seems when I get to this point I am totally chopped n screwed.

So the constant weight battle is still on full throttle. I have finished all the nonsense and got all the comfort eating out my system. I am in full hustle mode. Cause let the truth be told. I see the difference now. Before when I was the small girl, I didnt see the things I see now. Motherfuckas are mean to your ass when your fat! Men, say they like you the way you are or certain things doesn't matter. But it seems to me, they do care. I care as well, For my own personal health and happiness Issues. I have been busting my ass working out. But maybe its time to go the extra mile. I have to find an alternative to salads, I think if I eat one more salad I am going to smack someone in their damn face. Ugh. SO it's 6:30 I live Miranda Cosgrove. she is the shit. I know that is really random.
 Ok, I also have been working on the Barbie Challenge and discovered that their is a line of dolls that are stick thin, Model like seriously made by Integrity Dolls, they are so damn fierce it drives me crazy...The have some  haute outfits!

Well. This was really random i am tired ( mentally )

pass the peas.

Beyonce you know you a bad influence....You got heffa's out here thinking they can get away with the "Etta James" Shame on you BOTH! [ holding in 9lbs of laughter]

Pause.

 Your so drunk...At the wrong time there is no one to tell about it. You are just pissy ass drunk on myspace. Not doing a single thing. Just trying to figure out why you slip and slide to the keyboard just to see..Some folks you do not even know. If I had my choice I would. Watch Forensic Files all damn day long instead of being drunk and blurry.

But at five they make sure they cut that shit off and do some midnight love commercials.

Wonderland to Nowhere
Are you happy now that the house has fallen apart
I have cried a thousand tears each one wanting change
You don't know how to mend this broken pieces
I only have my weak heart left
Which is hanging by a single thread
The dreams are flying away
to no where fast
thanks for showing me the devil wears all shades
except it for what it may be.