Johnny Woodie is an entrepreneuer, a creative genius, and probably one of the funniest people ever. We decided to sit down, have a heart-to-heart, and ask some important questions, some completely random questions, and even questions requested by YOU, the reader. Please enjoy, I know I did.
1. Johnny Woodie, what is your age, location, and marital status?I'm 20, I'm currently in Charlottesville, VA (D.C. tomorrow, Charlotte NC Thursday) and I'm engaged.
2. Where is your current place of employment?MTV, LC Marketing, Art & Ink Publications
3. When you aren't working, what type of activities do you partake in?Usually just hanging out with my fiance or downloading young jeezy torrents... All depends.
4. Do you sleep on a certain side of the bed?I can fall asleep in a bed and wake up in a tennis court.... It's weird.
5. I'd consider you to be a pretty hip man. In your eyes, what new trends are on the horizon in clothing, shoes, and technology?Dude, the future of trends is simple... Raw buffalo skin shirts are the new tall tees, Racoon skin caps are the new 59/50 hats, straight Jesus sandles are the next dunk highs, and smoke signals will over power any iphone, blackberry or sidekick. Believe me, I read the blogs, shits coming.
6.If you could live life as one person for a day, who would it be? And once you became that person, who is one person you would chokeslam?I'd become Guy-Manuel de Homem-Christo from Daft Punk and I'd choke slam Kanye West for making a horrible song. Then I'd choke slam myself for letting Kanye West sample my music, then I'd transform back and choke slam Kanye West again for that horrible fucking song, then I'd choke slam a few people who go to college in Charlotte, I'm talking full on body cast choke slam.
7. So Johnny, some may not know this, but you are an amazing skateboarder, even though you rarely ever do so. Do you ever see yourself skateboarding again?The only way I'd skate again is if Pac Sun would let me perform the same type of Kanye West choke slam on every customer that leaves their store... Pussies.
8. If you had the chance to be one one reality television show, which one would it be and why?Celebrity Fit Camp, pretty self explanatory...
9. What kind of music are you feeling lately?Well Homes, lately i've been pushing Chromeo, Aesop Rock, Jus†ice, The Teenagers and some other shit.
10. Do you know how to drive a stick shift?Fuccck no.
11. Say you were taken hostage. How would you react?Chuck Liddel vs. Tito Ortiz. I'd have a flash back to the times i choke slammed Kanye and react in the same manner, mixed with a little Chuck Liddle vs. Tito Ortiz.
12. What is one thing you are realistically afraid of?Mayo, seriously. This shit was like four years ago... My friends James Dulin and William Bullard though it would a great idea to set my board against the wall and rub mayo all over the nose, so when i went to grab it i would have mayo all over my hands. Their plan worked too well, I threw up in the bathroom came back out and went into a rage... I'm talking 15 yearolds in a Puddle of Mudd mosh pit trying to prove a point type rage... So it wasn't that bad at all really...
13. If you would, please create an acronym for your first name. J- jocksuck
o-octopussyringtone
h-haaaaaay
n-nocturnaldeafeaglespread
n-neglecturbabies
y-youareafuckingpussy
14. Do you have any metrosexual habits?I've spent $600 in Louis Vuitton one day? I do those green facial things with my fiance.
15. what is some good advice for anyone who is going camping?Bring a generator, shit sucks otherwise...Unless you got a Blackberry or Sidekick.
16. What is your favorite internet abbreviation?GD= Goddamn or GDMF = goddamn mother fuck or GDMF= Gah Dod Mondays FUN!
17. Tell one story about your younger school years, please.In 8th grade, we were in Tech class, actually the module where you built a hot air ballon... My partner brought a porno in to class and being the youngsters with raging hormones we were, we put that thing in and were watching it. We saw our teacher walking towards us and we thought we were hitting the power button, but really he was hitting the up volume button, so as loud as the TV will go, you hear the most silly porno music and lines. I had to write some paper about why i shouldn't have done it. But in my paper I wrote about why I'd do it again. Haha
18. Thanks, no thanks, or name drops?Yeah, thanks to: my fiance Ashley, Daniel Horton, Vicki D. Drew Heffron, Adam, Henry Broggi, Bobby Webster, Myk, Niche, Seamus, Nik Pawlak...I'm sure I'm missing some for sure. No thanks: fuck you.
Peep....
www.johnnywoodie.com,
www.thenichemarket.com, and also,
http://members.sitegadgets.com/philbaty/board.html, haha.
NOW, JOHNNY WILL ANSWER THE QUESTIONS FROM THE READERS.
Buckmaster asks: "How big is your dick? Really? Dont try and smudge an inch or so. Include girth plz.I've got a fiance.
Brandon asks: "How did Fitty Cent survive all nine?"His skin is leather...It's all a marketing scheme for Vitamin Water.
Amy asks: "What is your favorite little kid's show?"Transformers by far, or Alvin and the Chipmunks.
Anonymous asks: "What is the nastiest thing you've ever done?"Daniel and I were in Asheville for a Ladytron/CSS show and I pissed my pants in the pouring down rain.
Cha asks: "Do you think Adam Lazzara is a q-t? ;]Yeah they are, I own one myself.
Lazzara. Nik Pawlak asks: "What's a kind of water?"Artesian, Fluoridated, Mineral, Purified, Sparkling, Spring, Sterile, and Well.
Ching Tsao asks: "Why do i go into an epileptic sessile when I visit your Myspace pages?"Weak eyes, small brain.
Kevin asks: "Are Seamus's legs really as smooth as rumour has it?"So I hear, he's got Nair-style legs. Silky smooth.
Anonymous asks: "When are you tying the knot?"Weird, Three years.
Anonymous asks: "How many times have you fucked yourself?"MILLIONS!
Jackie asks: "If you could be any fictional character, who would it be and why?"Angelica from rugrats, Bitch got whatever she wanted.
End. Keep checking MINDSETGEAR, your number one source for haha's and lol's.