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Tayler



Last Updated: 11/22/2009

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Gender: Male
Status: Single
Age: 29
Sign: Taurus

City: Little rock
State: Arkansas
Country: US
Signup Date: 8/28/2007

Blog Archive
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August 18, 2009 - Tuesday 

Current mood:  breezy
  I Got Your Mama

 


Little Carol came into the kitchen where her mother was making dinner.
Her
birthday was coming up and she thought this was a good time to tell her
mother
what she wanted. "Mom, I want a bike for my birthday."
Now, Little Carol was a bit of a troublemaker. She had gotten into
trouble at
school and at home. Carol's mother asked her if she thought she deserved
to get
a bike for her birthday. Little Carol, of course, thought she did.

Carol's mother, being a Christian woman, wanted her to reflect on her
behavior
over the last year, and write a letter to God and tell him why she
deserved a
bike for her birthday. Little Carol stomped up the steps to her room and
sat
down to write God a letter.

LETTER 1:
Dear God:
    I have been a very good girl this year and I would like a bike for
my
birthday I want a red one.
          
                      Your friend,
                      Carol

Carol knew this wasn't true.  She had not been a very good girl this
year, so
she tore up the letter and started over.



LETTER 2:
Dear God:
   This is your friend Carol. I have been a pretty good girl this year,
and I
would like a red bike for my birthday.
                  Thank you,
                  Carol

Carol knew this wasn't true either. She tore up the letter and started
again.



LETTER 3:
Dear God:

  I know I haven't been a good girl this year. I am very sorry. I will
be a
good girl if you just send me a red bike for my birthday.
                  Thank you,
                  Carol

Carol knew, even if it was true, this letter was not going to get her a
bike. By
now, she was very upset.  She went downstairs and told her mother she
wanted to go to church. Carol's mother thought her plan had worked
because Carol looked very sad.

"Just be home in time for dinner," her mother said.

Carol walked down the street to the church and up to the altar. She
looked
around to see if anyone was there. She picked up a statue of the Virgin
Mary,
slipped it under her jacket and ran out of the church, down the street,
into her
house, and up to her room. She shut the door and sat down and wrote her
letter
to God.



LETTER 4:
I GOT YOUR MAMA.
IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER AGAIN, SEND THE BIKE.

              Signed,
              YOU KNOW WHO

 

9:23 PM 
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July 31, 2009 - Friday 

Current mood:  bouncy
First-year students at Texas Aim's Vet school were attending their
first anatomy class, with a real dead cow. They all gathered around the
surgery table with the body covered with a white sheet.. The professor
started the class by telling them, "In Veterinary Medicine it is necessary to
have two important qualities as a doctor: The first is that you not be
disgusted by anything involving the animal body". For an example, the
Professor pulled back the sheet, stuck his finger in the butt of the dead
cow, withdrew it and stuck his finger in his mouth. "Go ahead and do the same
thing," he told his students.


The students freaked out, hesitated for several minutes, but
eventually took turns sticking a finger in the butt of the dead cow and
sucking on it. When everyone finished, the Professor looked at them and
said, "The second most important quality is observation. I stuck in my
middle finger and sucked on my index finger.. Now learn to pay attention.
Life's tough, but it's even tougher if you're stupid.."
4:45 PM 
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July 17, 2009 - Friday 

Current mood:  breezy
Bad day at Hallmark
Ever wondered what happens when Hallmark writers are having a bad day???
 
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
////////////////////////////////////////////
My tire was thumping.
I thought it was flat
When I looked at the tire...
I noticed your cat.
Sorry!
 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Heard your wife left you,
How upset you must be.
But don't fret about it...
She moved in with me.
 
 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Looking back over the years
that we've been together,
I can't help but wonder...
'What the hell was I thinking?'
 
 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Congratulations on your wedding day!
Too bad no one likes your husband.
 
 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
How could two people as beautiful as you
Have such an ugly baby?
 
 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I've always wanted to have
someone to hold,
someone to love.
After having met you ..
I've changed my mind.
 
 
--------------------------------------
----------------------------------------------------------
I must admit, you brought Religion into my life.
I never believed in Hell until I met you.
 
 
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
//////////////////////////////////////////
As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...
That you're not here to ruin it for me.
 
 
####################################################
Congratulations on your promotion.
Before you go...
Would you like to take this knife out of my back?
You'll probably need it again.
 
 
****************************************************************************
****
Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!
(Available only in Arkansas , Tennessee , Kentucky , Mississippi & West
Virginia )
 
 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Happy birthday! You look great for your age.
Almost Lifelike!
 
 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When we were together,
you always said you'd die for me.
Now that we've broken up,
I think it's time you kept your promise.
 
 
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
//////////////////////////////////////////
We have been friends for a very long time ..
let's say we stop?
 
 
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
I'm so miserable without you
it's almost like you're here.
 
 
=====================================================
Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.
Did you ever find out who the father was?
 
 
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
Your friends and I wanted to do
something special for your birthday.
So we're having you put to sleep.
 
 
))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
))))))))))))))))))))
So your daughter's a hooker,
and it spoiled your day.
But just look at the bright side,
it's really good pay!
7:47 PM 
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March 26, 2009 - Thursday 

THIS IS INCREDIBLE.... Read all the Numbers...
Slowly and in Order!!
Be Careful not to MISS ANY
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19
20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27
28 29 30
Scroll down .....................
 
Answer highlighted with white font.
 
 
 
 
TOMORROW I'LL SEND YOU THE ABC's
It's so easy to amuse old people.
2:43 PM 
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March 21, 2009 - Saturday 

Current mood:  horny
Category: Games
This wasn't even my dream to begin with but was amusing enough since I know everyone mentioned/dreamed about. My other half decided to include world of warcraft and my workspace into his dream. Meaning my boss was a bubble hearthing Paladin the manager was a Warrior and me the hunter... who clearly in the telling couldn't get enough space between myself and my target to shoot.
 
So here is the telling, I misplaced some of the converstation since I was at work and using yahoo massenger. =(
 
Other half= It's all your FAULT!
Me= Wah?
Other half=I woke up from a really WEIRD dream.. I blame YOU, mister!
Me= Pfft
Other half= Seriously it's all your fault!
Me= Oo -mews?-
Other half=I was at your workplace, with you. There were some people that I didn't recognize. a few of your co-workers. And I believe that Pam and I got into a BIG fight. Next thing I Know, we go WoW crazy. Everyone started using class talents. Some girl was a warlock (Debbie I think..) Pam was a warrior. One of the guys Jon started to bubble-hearth when a machine near your work-area exploded from a fireball ...I think Brittney threw. Brittney froze herself in a block of ice with a water elemental standing guard. I death-gripped someone I didn't know and nearly beheaded them, save that Pam charged and stunned me. >>(He gets to be a DK but I'm stuck as a freakin hunter who can't shoot see he doesn't love me.)  You had your cat and was trying to get to a distance to shoot something. Then someone struck somoene else over the head with a sap. Most likely this is someone who she only met once. And there was Jim  that went panther and stealthed out of the way.
 
Me= Haha.. and you call me weird you freak. <3
Other half= -sticks tongue out at...
Okay cutting the  rest out we gush at each other. with tongue licking and such anywho.
The weird thing about all of this is each person mentioned suits the class they there were in the dream. Which is scary in the we are way to connected way.
12:45 AM 
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