Remarkable the shifts in the ever effervescent eclipse we call life. In the space of a single breath numerous threads that span beyond human cognative capacity interweave and pull taut. We cannot comprehend time nor its effects on each of these innumerable paths of energy. Our dimensions are limited. Yet we pass from still to still faster than the frames of a piece of film. I have tread the land of death and despair for too long and now that I wake I feel as one emerging from a coma. So learned and relieved yet so very troubled still. Too young, for in my limbo of purgatory I have aged not a day. Abruptly I am faced with daylight while my eyes remain attuned to darkness. I am temporarily blinded.
I just read that a friend I loved once and still care for is now a mother, nearly two years later from the date we parted. I am aggrieved that I have lost so much time, yet celebratory that she is unfurling at last into the bloom I knew as a tentative bud. What a remarkable revelation.
Although disoriented, I can feel my heart trilling and know that this is a sign. You are alive, it murmurs with self-assurance and a hint of anticipation. The sadness in my eyes has dulled to a misty gray rather than a cavernous black. I smile and my laugh sounds positively delighted. Sweet my mother, cast me not away. Mother Earth, I suckle no longer at your breast but please, I beg of you, teach me to BE.
To say I am not terrified would be blasphemy upon my code of honesty. More equipped, surely. Wiser, perhaps, than I was once. I measure my breath and shuffle forward. I reach for the knob of the door and feel virbations from the world outside. Swallow hard in my barren mouth and set my jaw. I turn the knob.
Light floods in.
 | Currently listening:
Famous Last Words
By My Chemical Romance
Release date: 29 January, 2007 |
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