Q. Did you hear the University of Michigan is going to bring back artificial
turf in their football stadium?
A. They're tired of the cheerleaders eating all the grass.
Q. What do you call a football player in Michigan who has talent?
A. An Ohio product
Directions to Michigan........ North till you smell crap, then West till
you step in it.
A Michigan fan and an Ohio State fan go to the restroom and stand next
to each other at the urinal. They finish about the same time. The
Michigan fan goes to the sink to wash his hands and the Ohio State fan
starts to walk out. The Michigan fan yells that the Ohio State fan and
says hey in Michigan they teach us to wash our hands after going to the
bathroom. The Ohio State fan replies back. At Ohio State they teach us
not to pee on our hands...
A young man hired by a supermarket reported for his first day of work.
The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a
broom, and said, "Your first job will be to sweep out the store." "But
I'm a graduate of the University of Michigan," the young man replied
indignantly. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realize that," said the manager.
"Here, give me the broom - I'll show you how."
4 college alumni were climbing a mountain. An Ohio State grad, a
Michigan grad, a Penn State grad, & a Notre Dame grad. As they climbed
they began to fight over who was the most spirited alumni & loved their
school more. As they reached the top the Notre Dame grad hurled himself
off the mountain. As he fell to his doom he shouted "THIS IS FOR THE
FIGHTING IRISH!!!" Not wanting to be out done, the Penn State grad then
shouted "THIS IS FOR THE NITANY LIONS!!!!" and hurled himself off the
side of the mountain. Of course not wanting to be outdone the Ohio State
grad shouted " THIS IS FOR THE BUCKEYES" & walked over and pushed the
Michigan grad over the side of the mountain!!!!!
GO BUCKS!!! BEAT MICHIGAN!!