[Note: this piece could probably use an "editing eye," as Tim Gunn would say, but I'm drunk]

I learned a disturbing thing about myself earlier today, a thing having to do with novocaine and term limits. But first, a little back-story. It concerns college, coffee, and housewife drugs.

I'm a fella who really likes coffee, in spite of how cliched that sounds (sorry, Jeff). Don't worry, I'm not one of these trite idiots who talks about coffee as if it's some indispensable life-giving elixir or anything. I don't "need" the coffee. I don't say "oh my god, I can't do anything without my morning coffee, know what I mean?" I just really like the taste, the aroma, and the warmth. I don't need, or even feel, the caffeine. Whatever addictive hold it has over others, it doesn't have that over me. The reason for this is simple; massive overexposure in my youth. The coffee got me through college, or at least it tried to.

In 1999 I began attending Otis College of Art and Design. I knew it would be difficult and time-consuming. How many colleges aren't difficult and time-consuming? I'm sure most of them are; but this felt like something more. There was so much work. So much homework. I felt like I never got to sleep anymore. Ordinarily I would just chalk it up to my obsessive nature, my need to re-do projects until I thought they were perfect, but every student appeared to be going through the same ordeal as me.

A typical day at Otis consisted of 8-12 hours of classes, followed by 8-10 hours of homework. There's only 24 hours in a day. I would tell you to do the math, but telling someone to do the math strikes me as needlessly cruel. Math is hard. My only point here is that this only left like 4 hours for sleeping on any given day, and I also had a full-time job on the side. Time and sleep were in precious short supply. I wasn't about to become a speed freak, and I already loved my coffee. The answer would seem to be obvious- just drink more of it.

This brilliant scheme of mine worked until halfway through my Sophomore year, and then it stopped. I had consumed so much coffee that the effects of the caffeine were no longer noticeable at all. I could drink a pot of coffee and take a nap. I could drink two pots and have trouble staying awake in class all day. One night I drank a 4-pack of Red Bull in order to finish a project, then promptly fell the hell asleep. The only reason I didn't drink a 6-pack of Red Bull is that they don't make 6-packs. Whatever stimulants were supposed to do to the human body, they were no longer doing it to me.

I graduated 6 years ago, but the immunity has stayed with me. I hear stories from people who say that one cup of coffee has them bouncing off the walls. I shake my head. I tell them about the 4 Red Bull night and they look at me like I just denied the Holocaust. Trust me, I'm not bragging. I'd love to be able to slam a Red Bull and be instantly rewared with the manic energy of Robin Williams from his coke days. Minus the horrible John Wayne impression, you understand. Doesn't happen. Coffee knocks me out. Red Bull doesn't do anything but cause me to marvel at its horrible taste and dopey commercials. I've built up a tolerance that will most likely never subside.

I told you that story so I could tell you this one.

Me and some pals went to Burning Man a couple of weeks ago, as many of you know. Burning Man means a lot of things to me, and one of those things is the opportunity to take a load off and get loaded. I deserve it. I behave in a healthy fashion all year. I drink sparingly and don't do any drugs to speak of. I barely even smoke dope at all, which is almost enough to get your California citizenship revoked. One toke off a j makes me sleepy and puts me into a paranoid space that would make Howard Hughes take notice. I'm a good boy. Except at Burning Man, where the sky's the limit (sorry, Mom).

I don't mean to make it sound like I was a complete stoner or anything, just that it's a more relaxed atmosphere. A little guilt-free recreational drug use is all. There's no need to get into the gory details, just know that it was enjoyable. It ended as soon as I left.

The festivities began and ended with a nice infusion of housewife drugs. Vicodin, percocet, valium, the usual. They put you in a nice headspace, they help with the aches and pains, and they don't keep you up all night. I enjoy doing the HW. Unfortunately for myself, the heroic amount of HW activities directly contributed to my rather unpleasant day at the dentist. As if the dentist needed to be any less enjoyable.

It seems that the surfeit of HW-ing did quite a number on my tolerance for soporifics. Turns out when you consume a superhuman amount of opiates you get a higher threshold, just like with coffee. It seems obvious now, doesn't it? I did a buttload of painkillers out in the desert, there was sure to be some physiological carryover.

The end result is that the kindly dentist gave me a perfectly logical amount of novocaine for my procedures, and a mere hour later I had purged the entire dosage from my system. He's poking around in there and I'm white-knuckling it the whole time. Squirming in my seat and being rather obvious about it.

"Are you feeling any of this?" he asked, somewhat incredulously.
"yes" I replied in a very small voice.
 "Do you want more novocaine?" he asked in a skeptical voice.
"yes please" I answered in an even smaller voice than before.

Luckily for me, he obliged. I made it through the rain. Poor Dr. Lane, I hope he doesn't think I'm chasing the dragon or something. It was just a little percocet, I swear. It's not like I'm Brett Favre. They were nice and cozy, as illicit substances go. Nothing I'd like to make a daily habit out of.

So what did you learn, Dorothy? Well, a couple of things. One is that I probably can't run for President now. We also learned that once a year I am a horrible disappointment to my sainted mother. And that housewives have their own version of drug addiction, one we're not supposed to think is weird at all. And finally, you can always ask for some more novocaine. He has to give it to you.

Gotta go, gang. I got a hot date with a certain Mr. Jack Daniels.

Zimbabwe, we got some problems.

HARARE, Zimbabwe (CNN) -- Zimbabwe's central bank will introduce a $50 billion note -- enough to buy just two loaves of bread -- as a way of fighting cash shortages amid spiraling inflation.

.. ...... ..

The country's acting finance minister, Patrick Chinamasa, made the announcement in a government gazette released Saturday.

Although Chinamasa did not give the date on which the $50 billion and new $20 billion notes would come into circulation, an official at the Reserve Bank of Zimbabwe said the notes would be distributed to all banks by the end of Monday.

That doesn't bode well for their economy, now does it. When the U.S. dollar, which is not exactly soaring itself, goes for 25billion Zimbabwe dollars, you are officially in trouble.

Because this is pretty much MILF Island


"The COUGAR" (Los Angeles)

The search is on for guys 21-29

TV Land has announced a new reality dating series
from the creator of "'The Bachelor" that will follow
a group of young men vying for the heart of a
successful, hot, older woman!

The producers are looking for men who are charming,
attractive, adventurous, and looking for excitement.

"The Cougar" is produced by Next Entertainment
in association with Warner Horizon Television,
with Mike Fleiss serving as executive producer.


Please send a PICTURE AND SHORT BIO to:
Erika@kasstinginc.com


TV, you have betrayed me again.

No wonder Michael Moore has such a boner for Canada.

Sorry, I usually refrain from the "Michael Moore is fat" jokes, but this opportunity is too enticing to pass up.

OTTAWA: Obese people have the right to two seats for the price of one on flights within Canada, the Supreme Court of Canada ruled on Thursday.

The high court declined to hear an appeal by Canadian airlines of a decision by the Canadian Transportation Agency that people who are "functionally disabled by obesity" deserve to have two seats for one fare.

Yes, you read that right. Obese people get a free extra seat. FREE. The airline is supposed to just eat the cost of another ticket. Unfortunate choice of words on my part, sorry. Some people who are too large to fit in one airline seat will get a second one free of charge.
Of course, nothing in life is free, and that goes double for big business. You can't expect airlines (which are already struggling to make a profit) to just give away free seats. So no, they will not actually be free.

We have to pay for them. The airlines will have to raise their ticket prices to compensate for fewer sales. They will have to estimate how much revenue would be lost with these "free" seats, and bump up the prices of ALL tickets. Since they're a business, and since they'll undoubtedly be pissed off about this, I imagine they will estimate on the high side of error. Just to be on the safe side, you know?

You and I will have to subsidize the airline tickets of people who can't fit into just one seat. If we fly within Canada, at any rate. This is unfair. But then, I must be size-ist.

That's enough outta you!

You know what I'm tired of? I'm tired of people complaining that stores put out the Christmas decorations too early every year.
Screw you people. I fucking love Christmas. I can't wait for the decorations to come out. I'm happy when they come out, and I'm always sad when they get put away.
Even if it were a legitimate criticism to make, it's been said WAY too many times already. After, say, the 10-billionth time someone says "Oh my gosh, they put the Christmas decorations out earlier and earlier every year!" it cease to be an amusing observation.
Trust me; I wouldn't steer you wrong.

Bärsärkargång and then some.

I had a whale of a time on Election Night in America. It was a lot of fun, to be sure. But nothing, and I do mean nothing, was more fun than checking in with the fine folks over at freerepublic.com to see what their take was on the proceedings. Probably a lot of guarded optimism and begrudging congratulations, right?

It was so much fun, I had to bookmark some of the entries. Two weeks later, it's just that much funnier. Let's take a look, shall we?

Did the Democrats win because we let God down?
I'm blaming W for his "new tone".
He didn't use the bully pulpit to address all the lies, distortions and conspiracy theories the MSM/Libtrads manufactured for our demise.
Sarahcuda is the only positive thing that came from this campaign.
by Clint N. Suhks

God has abandoned us.
by Boagenes

America may have forgotten its spiritual roots. However, there are yet millions who remember our calling. The kingdom of Heaven is at hand. The deceiver has beguiled the people again. His lies will fall upon his own head and the blind ones he leads. Keep your heart pure. The best is yet to appear.
Love God and walk with Him. You will know the way.
by Armaggedon

"WE" didn't do any of that! "THEY" did! and we all know who they are! our school teachers and neighbors and journalists, etc...
we need to quite fooling ourselves! Our propensity for "tolerance" is what has put us here and it was decades in the making!
by annelizly

How stupid is that. Sorry but I am extremely upset right now and I do not need anyone to blame GW Bush for what is happening to this country due to this election. Stupid people voted this Marxist into office, and GW Bush is not to blame.
by sibb1213

Baloney. "We" didn't do anything, we aren't to blame, not the base. The Dems are the Godless ones, not the vast majority of Pubs. God didn't do anything, we didn't do anything other than fight to win. But our leaders (Bush Admin) have let us down, by opening up our borders to anyone and everyone. Too many socialistic immigrants have been let into this country who have no vested interest in the principles on which it was founded. McCain would have been as bad as Bush on this topic. But look mostly to the Dems who want to level our society to third world society status. Unfortunately they will take us down with them.
by flaglady47

 As much as it looks like Sodom, there are enough Christ followers in our country to make it worth saving.
The "Obama experience" could turn us into another Nineiva as shouts for the savior Obama turn into taunts of "crucify him" as the unintended consequences of the "experience" are revealed.
by The Brush

How can 2/3 of Americans be so damn blind and stupid. To vote in a communists as corrupt and dishonest as this nitwit is beyond me. Wait until things start going wrong and watch the crying.
by Logical me

God Bless Texas! I have to get out of NY.
by bushfamfan

The people who were either mislead or wanted socialism are to blame. God had nothing to do with it, he gives us free will to make our own choices and this is what the majority of the people in this country wanted.
I do agree that we will now pay for our sins, but it's the sin that the people voted this disaster upon us.
I did my part, I voted against socialism, I do not take blame.
by softwarecreator

Uh-oh, looks like McCain is conceding...
Way too gracious.
Obama does not deserve to be president. God help us all, even the stupid pieces of sh*t who voted for this mistake.
by KJC1

I don't think McCain had access to the same information on Obama as we had! It's like he's talking about an entirely different person.
by Liberty Ship

The nightmare has started. I don't think I'll post here for a long long time but thanks for the effort and maybe I'll see you again during the insurgency. Or in the reeducation camp. Take care and God Bless, Amerika committed suicide tonight.
by Baladas

We will all wonder how so many idiots can exist in the US.
PALIN 2012!
by tobyhill

of course it was about race! We just couldn't point it out because then we were the racists!!! Look how many white people went against their own race? that is the real shocker, not that blacks came out in droves to vote for a black candidate but how many white people came out in droves to vote for a black man!
by annelizly

Any likelihood of beginning impeachment proceedings on Jan. 21, 2009?
Just asking.........
by TheRobb7

What he should have said was:
The party of sleaze won tonight.
People who suck babies out of wombs, want to drill each other in the ass and marry each other instead of drilling for natural resources, people who hate Christianity, people who would sooner defend Muzlims than accept anything the Bible says, people who lie to people's faces for votes, who pay for votes, who rig the system so that dead people vote, people who vote five times, people who want government handouts, who want to shut down the coal industry, who want electricity prices to soar, who dont want energy independence, people who support those who want to blow up the Pentagon, but will disarm the US military.
So, we are now officially a nation run by the party of sleaze. A third world piece of crap with a third world piece of crap president.
congratulations.
by Canedawg

Coming out of my shock: I just snapped that Michelle is First Lady.
OMG.
by txflake

Sarah Palin is the only GOOD thing to come out of this election for the GOP. If you can't see this, then you are part of the problem.
by antceecee

 ...and now, on to the Grant park rally...
B. Hussein Obama got them into neat rows pretty quickly. Did they get fitted for their Commie uniforms ahead of time?
by Elvina

To hell with McCain and his ilk. To hell with "reaching across the isle." Its time for a good purging. I am ashamed of my country and my party. The insurrection starts tonite. We must rebuild while fighting this disgrace of a president at every turn.
by rnor6084

This is Mc Pains ow doing.
Right on down to Campaign Finance Reform and this **
"reaching across the aisle" SHIT.
McPain needs to be water boarded into being a conservative.
by nmh

Keep the Faith Freepers, and Join me in prayer!
May God Bless his true Sons and Daughters, and give us all the strength to carry on the Mission, for our children and granchildren, to be free to worship HIM!
Amen!
by OPS4

Congratulations Amerika!
Congratulations Amerika! You've now selected a brazen socialist coward as president.
Even though our nation's founding fathers deserved better! Even though our veterans deserved better! Even though the victims of 9/11 deserved better! Even though our troops deserved better! Even though our children deserved better! This nation has voted instead to spit in all of their faces!
We should be absolutely ashamed of our ignorant, lazy selves for voting for these filthy Bolsheviks into office! Mark my word: We will regret this day! Resistance there will be.
by solace68

They've finally got their first Marxist Muslim president and I know al Qaeda appreciates it. But NOW what are they going to do? Wait until the Obamacorns figure out that they just screwed themselves.
by FlingWingFlyer

America has elected a lazy, good-for-nothing, fraudulent, plagiarizing, Marxist, illegal alien as their leader.
Congratulations.
by hsrazorback1

This soldier will be retiring after 32 yrs. I still have 10 more yrs. left if I want it, but I will not be under the command of this mongrel. I served 4 yrs active duty under the hollow Army of jimmah carter, I refuse to do it again. Dig in people! Improve yourselves, spiritually, mentally, and physically.Read the Bible,and classic books, learn to hunt, fish, shoot. Be self sufficient
by roughman

Not that I agree with secession, (I don't), but I have a much better insight and understanding of how the South felt when Lincoln was elected in 1860.
by Emperor Palpatine

Alright, where are the bumper sticker people when you need them...
How about "For the first time in my adult life, I'm NOT proud of America".
The only good thing to know out of this whole mess is that God is still in charge.
by Imnidiot

That is what I think too. God has withdrawn his grace from the Establishment of this country. He has given them over to their hearts. The Results will not be pretty.
by Revel

Babylon the Great (Multicultural Amerika) is rising, is rising and she now has her leader.
by LoneRanger

In a few years Obama's name will become a curse word. Darkly humorous.
by eclecticEel

Do not be discouraged. Yes, it is a dark day for our great country. We have seen darker days, survived, and excelled. Don't forget the horrific days of the Revolutionary War, Civil War, Depression, World War II, and Jimmy Carter. Tonight's message is to keep fighting and take back America. The loons on the left such as Bill Ayers think they won tonight because we conservatives became complacent and were way too polite. The socialists will only win if people like us give up. The battle is just beginning.
by SoCalTeresa


Was Sarah Palin a mistake?
On the contrary, Sarah is the only reason many of us voted for Mac.
by Scothia

Sarah Palin was LIFE SUPPORT for the McCain campaign!!!!
You wouldn't want to see the electoral map tonight if she wasn't on the ticket!
by cincinnati65

ABSOLUTELY NOT!!! STOP IT!!!!
by pollywog

Palin is the ONLY reason my wife and I - and millions of other Americans - voted for McShame.
PERIOD! If it weren't for Palin, McLame would have been 30 points behind in the popular vote. I hope we've all learned our lesson from this; Ron Paul 2012!
by Engineer_Soldier

Yes!
She is the nail in the coffin of RINOS!
Does that include you dear friend?
RINOS can get lost from this party.
by lonestar67

I worked for McCain BECAUSE of Sarah Palin.
by baseballmom

Sarah Palin was the only bright spot in this entire election debacle.
She is tops on my list to lead the CONSERVATIVE republican party in 2012.
To think that she is the reason why Juan lost is beyond insane.
by adm5

the only mistake made was for the McCain people to push the Gov on that stupid katic idiot show before she was ready...
SARAH PALIN WAS THE ONLY GOOD THING GOING ON ....
DON'T YOU PEOPLE DARE START UP ON HER...I PERSONALLY GAVE TONS OF MONEY AND SOME TIME AND SOME EFFORT TO GET MCCAIN ELECTED AND I WOULDN'T HAVE DONE IT FOR SOME WHITE BREAD TYPICAL PUB VP.....
SO NOTHING I DID WORKED.....BLAME ME...BUT DON'T BLAME THE BEST THING THAT HAS HAPPENED TO OUR PARTY ...THE ARRIVAL OF GOV. SARAH PALIN ON HER....SHE DID HER PART!
by cherry

Sarah was the plug that kept that sinking turd McCain afloat.
Were it not for her, I would've been in bed by 9PM Eastern.
by American_Centurion

Hell no! She was the only one with balls in the ticket. The blame goes to the rinos. Focus on getting them out and getting conservatives in.
Oh, and all the "learned elite" east-coast "conservative" talking heads can stay with 0bama. They will not be welcomed back in the conservative movement and in the Republican Party.
by ABQHispConservative

Absolutely not !!! Sarah was the best part of the ticket, period!
by NEPAConservative

She's the main reason I pulled the lever for McAmnesty and the only reason his beating didn'tresemble Fritz Mondales even more so.
by FlashBack

I worked the phones for McCain...
I held signs on election day...
I talked to my friends to vote for McCain...
I endured numorous slurs, insults, and middle-fingers...
AND THE ONLY REASON I PUT UP WITH THIS WAS FOR PALIN!!!!
AND I WOULD DO IT AGAIN FOR HER!!!!
by curling

Sarah Palin is the future of the Republican Party.....which is now!
by LYONS67

Without Palin on the ticket — I would have stayed home...
McCain was the Media's choice for the Republican party...
McCain was NOT a conservative, and barely a Republican...
The ONLY act by McCain that hinted concern over retaining the conservative base of the party, was his concession to select Palin....
Unfortunately - her apron strings were not enough to save McCain...
Perhaps now — a CONSERVATIVE party will form that KNOWS how to battle with the long toothed enemy of the Republic the "Democrats/Marxists" have become......and it ain't done by "reaching across the aisle" or working for bipartisan cooperation..... It requires DESTROYING the leftist bastards...
by river rat

I voted and worked for McPain because of Sarah. They had a choker collar on her during the election.
I am confident in the near future, she will nicely point out that McPain was too bipartisan, McPain felt MSM would be fair to him and she will attack the MSM for the deceit foisted upon the American people.
Life will go on... I am confident the Dems will lead with Far Left legislation, public opinion will come out against it and the Far Left legislation will die a slow death in committee. This will continue until the public realizes the DO NOTHING congress is the DO LESS congress and vote them out in 2010. Obama will be saddled with a broken economy, congress may provide tax cuts, but they will be
of little value, Bush will be blamed again.
I want Palin to run for the nomination in 2012, I want fiscal and social conservatives to retake the GOP, yet welcome all. This country is too strong to roll over, however I do visualize a repeat of Nam'.
We will abandon the Iraqi and Afghan people, all those purple fingers will be on the hit lists. History does repeat itself. McPain just gave his BIPARTISAN, I'm a loser, speech.
by fastrock

I think it would just be so cool to send Sarah and her family, once they get back to Alaska, bunches of roses from all who supported McC BECAUSE OF HER!!! TELL HER WE LOVE HER AND DON'T FORGET US..WE WON'T FORGET HER!
by celtic gal

Sarah Palin was the ONLY reason I voted for a scoundrel who tried to legalize an invasion of my people.
To hell with those trying to lay this at her feet. She was the only reason the election was so close.
by DwFry

Sarah Palin is an inspiration of morality, courage and strength. I hope she'll come back....she's what we need. We need redefinition. Let's dismiss the East Coast elitists who turned on us in this election and try to work on recruiting those Midwestern "Reagan" democrats who don't yet realize their party left them behind long ago.
by Lythium

Sarah carried McCain, the economy, and the Old Media on her superhuman back throughout the whole campaign.
2012.
by TheFourthMagi

No freakin' way!!!
SHE ALONE was the reason that McAmnesty did as WELL as he did!
ANYONE who says otherwise is either a fool or a liberal dressed in conservative clothes!
by Mr. Jazzy

Top 30 Errors That Doomed McCain
The results are in and the recriminations have begun. Sure, it might not have made any difference, but the number of sins of omission and commission by the McCain campaign is breathtaking. Let's get a head start on the finger-pointing and give you the top thirty mistakes John McCain and his team made:
by AJKauf

Without Sarah Palin, Joe the Plumber and some Catholic bishops taking a stand for Life, it would have been worse for McCain.
McCain is a moderate just like Gerry Ford against Jimmy Carter in 1976, its time for the new Reagan to emerge. Sarah Palin is the new Ronald Reagan.
by Nextrush

I totally agree . . . Cheney should've resigned for whatever reason (altho I liked and still like him a lot) for the the good of the party . . . could have done it two years ago . . . pick a decent VEEP, and then run the new VEEP against that skinny bag of $hit and have the bully pulpit of the White House to do it.
Nice observation. Too late tho!
by laweeks

lord McCain set his own table. He spent the past 7 + years doing whatever it took to poke his finger in the eyes of conservatives. He just out Feingold himself when he believed his media harlots loved him for giving them the power to advertise for political campaigns.
I voted today for SARAH and that is the only way I could vote for him.
What happened to those PUMAs???
by Just mythoughts

His campaign strategy:
1. Never mention the 20 year history of shady connections of your Islamic terrorist loving opponent, or highlight his voting record.
2. Never mention the horrible things the Dem Senate did the last 8 years.
3. Make your most proud accomplishment undermining your own party on every issue the last 8 years.
4. Never mention the catastrophe Bush inherited, and the great things he accomplished despite all this.
by T. Jefferson

There should be no second-guessing of McCain. Every campaign makes multiple mistakes. The Marxist made more than Mac. It's just that the Republican has to thread the needle with his campaign, because he is dissected by the media, while the Marxist gets a free pass.
by line drive to right

I don't think anyone could have defeated BO and the MSM. The sheeple have been brainwashed about how bad bush is for 8 years and so him and the pubbies are hated. Twenty years from now when may be splitting a potatoe for 4 people they will blame Bush.
We just had our half honest election and I am going to be a bad sport.
by Big Horn

I'm grateful that John McCain gave us a gift by bringing Sarah Palin to the national stage.
I believe she will be our first female President - and hopefully ASAP.
by Lions Gate

OK, so we've lost; now what?
1. Just pretend you're on a really, really long vacation to Sweden.
2. To avoid your forthcoming tax increase, go to your boss and demand a pay cut.
3. Bring a copy of "War and Peace" to your doctor's waiting room. Don't worry, you'll have time to read it.
4. If you're an oil company, cut out the middle man and just declare bankruptcy.
5. Find out how to "clip coupons" and "find bargains." Life will be different when you're making maximum wage.
6. Take heart that your kids will no longer have to study market economics. Like intelligent design, it will no longer be taught in schools, as it is merely a theory that can't be proven.
7. When you find yourself saddled with a competitive spirit, cast more votes for your favorite American Idol! (Don't worry, the calls will be subsidized.)
by hockeyfan

Clean your firearms and get out and practice your groupings.
by ByteMercenary

Sarah for President, whoever for VP. And THIS time, we don't take any crap. By 2012, the media will be so busy covering for the 0bamination, they won't have time for hatchet jobs.
I recommend that we all practice the line:"Are you better off now, than you were four years ago?".
by NTHockey

Start working on your 9-year-old kid's Presidential campaign, because apparently that's all the experience you need to be elected.
by NavySon

Forget socialism. The infidel rats our waving the hammer and sickle flag of communism.
by Warlord David

Good news though- Prop 8 has passed!
The liberals will never let people live and let live even though the rest of us want to do that. They will keep on trying to impose their perverted values upon the rest of us.
by goldstategop

The right of the rest of us to have marriage be a union of a man and a woman and to have children raised with a father and a mother, needs to be taken away from us so a bunch of queers can feel better about themselves. We don't count, even though we are the majority in this country.
by goldstategop

I got into a nice argument with my wife's friend over gay marriage yesterday. She tried to tell me that times are changing, that we need to change also and accept that homosexuals should be allowed to integrate with the rest of us as equals. She told me that things are not like they were back in the last century.
I was so taken back by her saying this that I lost my cool big time. I said "So, because we have things like high speed internet, HDTV's, GPS navigators, and incredibly powerful computers at our fingertips we should accept that it is okay to **** another guy up the *** and everyone be accepting of it now that "times have changed?"
She never did give me a reply when I asked her to please explain why it is okay because times have changed, what is so different now that means gays can approach and solicit sex from your teen age son and you not have a problem with that.
I don't think I will be invited over to her house any time soon now.
by Abathar

Oh please. Like the homos in Castro care a lick (sorry) about MARRIAGE? They have like 70 anonymous sex partners per year! What a joke.
by montag813

of the 'millions' of queers in California, only a thousand or so have taken advantage of the marraige option. This pretty much tell us that they don't have any interest in marriage and monogamy in the first place. They just wanted to destroy marriage to get even with straight people.
by bpjam

Sodomites know that their entire perverted sex life is abnormal.
The reason they pushed for queers to marry is because
their life style is sterile and can not replenish their
cult, therefor they must recruit the young.
by HuntsvilleTxVeteran

IT PASSED? IT PASSED? OH DEAR GOD, BE THANKFUL FOR SMALL VICTORIES!
by Morgana

=====
And so on.

About that Prop 8 thing...
It's been nice to see the nationwide reaction to the disenfranchisement of homosexuals over the past couple of weeks. We've seen rallies and marches all across the land. It's good to know that there can be this much drive, this much organization behind such a worthy cause.

You know what would have been even better, though?

If there had been this kind of effort made before the motherfucking election.
Lesson learned, I guess.

...whenever the Lord opens a window, he closes a door.
Yesterday was an extraordinary day for Americans. Our original sin of slavery, while still a part of our shared experience, has finally been relegated to the dustbin of history. Racism does still exist, and always will to some extent, but this was certainly a huge step towards true progress. Even when I wasn't a huge Obama supporter, I recognized what a glorious achievement it would be were he to capture the Presidency. Now that I am an Obama supporter, it just feels that much better.

It was such a remarkable night that even John McCain came off sounding good. McCain gave a concession speech that was warm, heartfelt, engaging, and sympathetic. In short- everything he wasn't during the Presidential campaign. Seriously, McCain never sounded better. He actually gave a brief glimpse of the once-great man that I thought he was. He didn't sound crabby, or spiteful, or vindictive, or petty. He sounded genuinely happy for Barack Obama. I think it was probably a relief for John McCain to be able to relax and not be THAT GUY that he had been during the campaign. Other than the part at the end where he had to say nice things about Palin, this speech was quite moving.

Yes, I know that they have speechwriters for this sort of thing, and that they can make you say anything and sound good doing it. The right speechwriters can make you sound warm, gracious, decent, and smart. We all know that. But McCain had speechwriters during the campaign, too, and we all saw how that turned out.

Anyway, good for him.




It was a day filled with good things. There was much celebration. Even if you didn't want Obama to win, you had to recognize and appreciate that we were finally getting a black President. He was certainly going to be an improvement over Bush. Suck it up for a few years and give this guy a chance.

There was, however, one huge disappointment. Something that brought a somber mood to my house. The Presidential race was over by 8 o'clock, but I stayed up well past midnight to see how the local ballot initiatives shook out. And it was with a heavy heart that I resigned myself to the sad reality: Proposition 8 was going to pass.

If you're not from California, let me enlighten you. Proposition 8 was better known by the catchy moniker of Eliminates Right of Same-Sex Couples to Marry. Really, that was the name of it. And it was as advertised. California had recently made it legal for the dirty homosexuals to marry one another, and this new initiative was proposed to take it all back.

I had seen the commercials and the lawn signs. I'd read the pros and cons. I foolishly believed that California had turned a corner, and that we would serve as a shining beacon for much of America. Sure, Massachusetts had had gay marriage for a while now, but California is BIG. It's Hollywood. It's the place people want to move to. It's the cultural touchstone for so much of America. And California was just about as liberal as it got.

Or so you'd think. Living in L.A. or San Francisco, you forget sometimes. It's not as simple as all that. There are 36 million people living in California. Yes, there are a few very liberal cities, but there are also vast agricultural and industrial areas. Drive for an hour outside Los Angeles proper, and you won't even feel like you're in California anymore. And as it turned out, not everywhere was open to letting the homos tie the knot.

Prop 8 passed with 52.5-percent of the vote. A Yes on 8 was a No for same-sex marriage. It's a shameful day here in California. I'm sure we will have gay marriage soon enough, it just felt like this one was already in the Win column. And it wasn't.

I'm angry with anyone who voted Yes on 8. Livid might actually be a more accurate word. There was no reason to vote Yes unless you think gays should somehow be deprived or punished. I've heard excuses and read weak justifications. None of them carry any weight with me. If you don't want gays getting married, it's because you don't like gays. You think they're doing something wrong. You believe they should be punished, or at the very least not rewarded, for being gay.

 It's even worse than that, though. The demographic breakdown of the voting was disgraceful. One of the culprits will not surprise you. White Republicans voted Yes on 8 at the robust clip of 82-percent. But that's to be expected, right? I mean, look at these people.



Obviously they hate the gays. Was there ever any doubt? How much do you want to kick the shit out of the guy in the blue shirt?

The other culprit is the real killer. On this crucial vote, this incredibly important civil rights issue, African-Americans voted 70-percent Yes on 8. Barack Obama brought black voters to the polls in astonishing numbers, but somewhere along the way their compassion stayed home. How despicable is this? Some other racial demographics were guilty as well. Latinos voted 53-percent Yes, and Other (Armenians? Russians?) voted 51-percent. They have a lot to answer for, too.

But 70-percent? On November 4th, 2008, a day when black Americans had every reason to feel like change had finally come, some things didn't change. I don't mean to single out black Americans, it's just that this irony is particularly crushing.

Again, any Yes vote by anyone was a disgrace. I just feel like this particular oppressed minority could have taken a moment and exercised compassion. A No on 8 vote by the well-represented black community would have made yesterday perfect. Instead, there is still work to be done.

I can't blame the celebrities for this one. They did their part. Even Arnold Schwarzenegger said that a Yes on 8 would be a mistake. Have to give Arnold credit for that one. Samuel L. Jackson recorded a brilliant commercial which pointed up the similarities between homophobia and racial discrimination. This was the kind of cause that was right up Hollywood's alley, so you know they were on board.

No, almost every famous figure worth listening to came through and helped. Except for two. These two men didn't know they were hurting the cause. I'm sure they had the best intentions. But hurt the cause they did.

One of them was Gavin Newsom, the Mayor of San Francisco. Gay marriage had been one of his pet causes for years, and I admire that. Unfortunately, he's really annoying. He's arrogant, slick, and good-looking in a really oily way. Gavin Newsom is very easy to dislike, but the Yes on 8 campaign made him the face of the pro-gay marriage agenda.

Newsom gave a press conference back in May where he proclaimed that gay marriage was coming to California "whether you like it or not!" Now, I agree with this message. If you asked me how I felt, I would probably use those exact same words. But Newsom is a politician, and he should have chosen his words more carefully. This is not the kind of platform that you can hammer through. People need to be coaxed, not bullied. And the clip of Gavin Newsom brazenly assuring us that gay marriage was coming whether or not anyone liked it....well, you couldn't have come up with a more aggravating clip if you tried. It was red meat for the homophobes.

Watch this. Don't you just want to smack him?
Gavin Newsom,
you.
are.
not.
helping.




One other person harmed the cause. I'm not looking to pick on the guy, certainly. But it has to be said.
Barack Obama. He's done a lot to bring people together during this election, and I'm sure he will be a friend to the gay community. But on Proposition 8, Obama let us all down.

Obama did an interview for MTV last Sunday, and here is what he had to say:

"I believe marriage is between a man and a woman. I am not in favor of gay marriage. But when you start playing around with constitutions, just to prohibit somebody who cares about another person, it just seems to me that's not what America's about."

As you can see, he seemed to want it both ways. He clearly came out against the discriminating initiatives, but he prefaced this by saying that he was against gay marriage. I found that so aggravating. Why couldn't he just say that he was against the ballot measures without qualifying it? I was so disappointed when I saw this. If he had come out strongly against the initiatives in CA and FL, things might have been different. Florida isn't ready, but California is.

Obama could have recorded one commercial condemning Prop 8, and that might have done it. He got 97-percent of the black vote. Imagine if he had made a strong case to vote No on 8. If he had spoken plainly to African-Americans, imploring them to vote No, it might have made the difference. Was he afraid? Was he worried about alienating some black voters? Maybe he got gun-shy so close to the election, and wanted to avoid taking any controversial stand. It sure looks that way to me, especially when you can see how he tried to cover all his bases with that tepid response.

Something tells me that Barack Obama doesn't really have any problem with gay marriage, but he can't just say that. I don't think any major candidate can come out firmly on the side of gay marriage. That much change hasn't arrived yet. I still like him, I still think he'll make a great President, and I'm sure he has a better position on this than John McCain, but this interview made me sad. It felt too calculated.. He could have helped out on this one, and chose not to rock the boat. You can't accuse him of not wanting the face-time, so what else could have held him back? He acted too much like a politician this time.

Someday. Someday we're going to have a man or a woman run for President who is free to speak their mind. I mean truly speak their mind. We will have a candidate who is asked the gay marriage question and responds "I don't have any problem with gay marriage. In fact, I think it's great!" Instead we just get "Well, I think gays have the right to marry, but I still think what they're doing is wrong." And that's the answer we get from the guy we like. Never mind the other guy.

It will get better soon. I know this. I just wanted it to get better, you know, yesterday.

Heterosexual marriage does not need to be "defended" from anything. A marriage is a covenant between individuals, and it succeeds or fails on those merits alone. I don't need anybody protecting me, and I really want them to stop bothering my friends.

I have a story to tell.

April and I are with friends with two wonderful, sweet gay men. I'd like to talk about these two men and their story, but I haven't asked permission to use their names. For now, I'll refer to them as Party A and Party B. Because that's the world we live in, apparently.

These two men have been together in a committed relationship for...well the numbers are a little fuzzy. About 28 years, I believe. Longer than just about anybody else I know or that you know, let's leave it at that. In those 28 years, I don't think they've ever spent so much as one day apart. Their home is filled with love. Yet these two gay men, Parties A and B, were targeted for discrimination last night. And they lost.

I have a lot of friends. I've seen many committed, loving relationships. Some of them even look like they may have the strength to go the distance. Yet none of those other relationships can hold a candle to what my friends A and B have. Theirs is the most precious, singular, inspiring love that I've ever encountered. I cannot fathom what it would be like to look at these two men, to see what they had, and to think that this was somehow wrong. We should all of us be so lucky to find the kind of love that these men share. But fuck it, right? They're the enemy. They're dangerous. Their happiness infringes on your happiness.

A and B finally got themselves hitched this past August. Gay marriage had become a reality in California, and there was no stopping them. If ever two people deserved to spend their lives together, and to have their love recognized, it was these two men. They were married now, nobody could say differently. Maybe that doesn't sound like much to some of you hets out there, but that's because the law doesn't think you're doing something un-Constitutional.

A and B woke up this morning to discover that their marriage was now not a marriage. They hadn't done anything wrong. Nothing had changed in their behavior. They hadn't "threatened" anyone else's marriage. They just wanted to be left alone. They wanted to love each other without interference. That's it. My dear friend Party A just wanted to love his man and to be happy. But suddenly, their marriage didn't "count."

That's what we lost last night.

I don't know enough about the legal ramifications of this horrendous decision. I'm fairly certain that gay couples who married before the ban will still be married in the eyes of the law. I believe they get grandfathered in. And as I said before, I'm sure that gay marriage will be a reality for the entire country soon enough. Just....why did this happen? Why here, of all places? Why yesterday, of all days?

Sorry for the ramble. I've been in a funk the past couple of days. I keep breaking down, thinking of my dear friends who suffered such an attack on their dignity last night. I keep trying to imagine what it must be like to have found true love, true happiness, and then to wake up one morning and realize that your version of happiness is not going to be recognized in polite society. I try to imagine it, but I can't. I don't have the strength.

Good news though.
One last thing, and this at least is good news.
We will never again have to hear from that fucking cretin Ralph Nader. Never again. Some men fade into obscurity. Some fall suddenly. Ralph Nader just took a rocket sled into obscurity, and it could not have happened to a bigger narcissist.



FOX News is not exactly a network staffed with great journalists. I think we all know that. But they have their moments. Shep Smith and Chris Wallace are probably the only guys who work for FOX that count as actual newsman. Shep, in particular, seems unafraid to ask tough questions and to confront the guests head-on. So what if he looks like Liberace? Guy does a good job.

My contempt was not given freely; it was most definitely earned.
Here we are at last. Tomorrow we will line up outside high school gymnasiums and VFW halls and do our bit. Those lines will be long, most likely. Bring some snacks. It promises to be a grueling day. We'll be voting tomorrow, for a great many things. Prop. 2, Prop. 4, Prop. 5, and Prop. 8 are all very important. Congress and Senate seats are up for grabs. And of course, the race for the White House will finally (finally!) come to a close.

I have a strange perspective on this election season. For years I had wanted to vote for Senator John McCain. You might recall that in 2000 McCain was extremely popular with independent voters. Noted non-conservatives such as Bill Maher and Jon Stewart supported him. McCain enjoyed a chummy relationship with the press. He had a reputation for straight talk, and for taking on the most questionable elements in his own party. Unfortunately, John McCain underestimated just how low those fringe elements would go to undermine his candidacy.

McCain was blindsided by the vicious machinations of Karl Rove, the master strategist, who was acting on behalf of George W. Bush. A sinister whispering campaign served to stir up latent racism, and this was combined with a robo-call carpet-bombing initiative that convinced enough white racists that John McCain had sired a black daughter (gasp!) out of wedlock. This was a fabrication. McCain and his wife Cindy had adopted a young girl from Bangladesh in 1991, and this was the supposed "illegitimate black child" who brought down the McCain campaign. The mere existence of young Bridget McCain was enough "baggage" to convince South Carolina racists that John McCain was, ehhhh, just not enough of a Republican for them. They went with George Bush. Hilarity ensued.

I think that this experience damaged McCain more than he ever let on. He had come so close, but it was his own party that took him out. The Presidency would have been the culmination of a life of public service. He was an American hero from a storied military family. He had dedicated his life to helping others, and had cultivated a reputation for bipartisanship. Reaching across the aisle was not just rhetoric for John McCain. The Clinton years had polarized the country; McCain could bridge the gap. He was a good man, and an honorable one. You might not always have agreed with his positions, but he made you smile while disagreeing with him. He never took himself too seriously. He had an infamous temper, but it seldom flared up in public (behind closed Senate doors was another story). There was a time when we weren't tired of hearing the POW stories, and it was impossible to be unmoved by them. I could never have held out as long as he did. Would I really have turned down a chance at freedom? No way. I wasn't cut out for this man's Army.

McCain held out longer than any of us ever could have as a POW, but his experience in 2000 may have been more damaging. McCain was a broken man after this defeat. He tried to hide it, but the signs were all there. I believe that somewhere, on some level, McCain vowed to never leave himself so vulnerable again. If that meant cozying up to the lunatic fringe on the right, so be it. If that meant subverting his own principles in favor of party dogma, then that's what it would take. Breaking bread with the "agents of intolerance" was no longer looking like such a bad idea. That's what this loss did to him. He had been a decent man, and he should have at least had the chance to be the Republican nominee way back when. A hell of a lot of people would have been excited to vote McCain in 2000. That never happened. America never got John McCain c. 2000.

I had always told myself that if John McCain were running for President, he would get my vote. He was a Republican, sure, but not the kind that I couldn't stand. His positions on immigration and climate change were a whole lot more flexible. He didn't treat immigrants, even the illegal ones, as if they were undesirables. His commitment to campaign finance reform was unprecedented for a Republican. Compromise was in his nature. One of the things I liked the most about him was that so many in his own party couldn't stand him. Anyone who pissed off that many characters on his own side was aces in my book.

And now...now I barely recognize this man who's running for President. I waited so long for this moment, and now I can't even believe I ever liked the guy in the first place.

I remember how I felt on March 4, 2008 when John McCain wrapped up the nomination for the Presidency. This was my guy, after all. He was finally getting the shot that he deserved. Even at this time I was straining to overlook some of my larger differences with the Senator, such as his position on gay marriage and his desire to overturn Roe v. Wade. I don't know why I held out for so long. I really don't know why. Loyalty? I think sometimes that if you spend enough time following the career of a public figure, you think that you know them. Even when you have differences, they feel more like the differences you'd have with a family member. That may be one explanation.

I signed up for e-mail alerts from the GOP website. I made a contribution to the McCain campaign. I felt good. Surely this would be an entertaining campaign, no matter who ran against the Senator from Arizona. I was confident that even if McCain lost, he would at least run a campaign that I could be proud of. He had promised to run a clean contest, and things had already gotten pretty ugly between Clinton and Obama.

I drew up a plan in my mind for the kind of effort I wanted to see, the kind that could win McCain the Presidency. He had to run a positive, dignified campaign free of slander and negative aspersions. He had to distance himself from George Bush. He had to appeal to independent voters. Democrats were not going to be nearly as friendly to him during the general election, but he still had a chance with Independents and undecideds. And finally, he needed to choose a running mate who had some real gravitas and who didn't scare the shit out of those independent voters.

It started off fairly well. McCain promised that he would, indeed, run a clean campaign. He even ordered some of his surrogates to pull an anti-Obama ad that mentioned Rev. Jeremiah Wright. I was pleased. Rush Limbaugh was incensed. Two good results, and we were on our way! This was probably the last time that I was proud of the McCain campaign.

Strange things began to happen. The media began to turn against McCain. Turns out he was only their guy when he was facing off against other Republicans. We all saw that coming, but John never did. It should have been obvious, but he was blindsided again.

Then a curious meme appeared: John McCain would just be "Bush's third term." I thought this was so peculiar. Anyone who followed politics knew that McCain hated Bush with a fiery passion, and why shouldn't he? Bush had been the beneficiary of the robo-calls and the repulsive whisper campaign in 2000. The two men were both Republicans, but they were as far apart politically as it was possible to be and still belong to the same party. I didn't give it much thought.

Then they started in with the "McCain voted with Bush 90-percent of the time" slogan. Not that they really had to dig that one up. McCain handed it to them on a platter. Even then, I still had a stirring defense all ready to go. I was holding on for dear life by this point, but my debate skills never flagged.

Would you like to hear my defense?
"I mean, so what if McCain voted with Bush 90-percent of the time? You can make numbers say whatever you want them to. How strange is it, really? McCain is still a Republican, he's bound to vote with the President the majority of the time. The issue is what things did they agree on and what did they disagree on. As long as it's the right issues, who cares what the percentages say? These guys are all politicians, they're going to vote the same way sometimes! Do Obama and Biden then vote with Bush 0-precent of the time? That's the idea that I get from the rhetoric. But no, Biden votes with Bush 56-percent of the time! Even Obama votes with Bush 40-percent of the time. So the 90-percent figure is more than a little misleading. Weren't these the same people who said that Joe Lieberman wasn't a real Democrat in spite of the fact that he voted Democrat 90-percent of the time? Why is 90-percent proof that McCain is a Bush clone, but Lieberman's 90-percent made him a complete pariah? The answer is that it has to be the right 90-percent, the right votes. I just wanted to show that you have to say more than just the number to prove the point."

Anyway, that was my stirring defense. Turns out I wasting my time. McCain had no intention of distancing himself from George Bush. Quite the opposite, actually.



I call this "McCain's third-biggest mistake." He courted the farthest-right elements of his party, in a year when the Republican brand was pure poison. George Bush was almost the forgotten man during this election, but McCain waited until there were only a few weeks left to put some real distance between them. Too late.

The second biggest mistake was the negative advertising. It was specious, dishonest, undignified, and largely immaterial. The connection to William Ayers wasn't strong and didn't matter to enough people. The Jeremiah Wright controversy was dealt with during the primaries, and McCain didn't even bother with it. There were other ads that were just flat-out dishonest. The accusation that Obama favored legislation that taught sex education to kindergarteners was pure fiction. It just got worse and worse.

And still I held on, mostly out of stubbornness. McCain had been my guy for so long, I didn't want to admit that he'd gone off the reservation so completely. I continued to make excuses. I felt defensive, probably inordinately so. I was seeing a lot of stuff to the effect that "if you're voting for McCain then we can't be MySpace friends anymore." Shit like that. First of all, oooooh big deal, we can't be MySpace pals anymore!. Second of all, fuck you and your childish threats. And it also didn't help that so many people were saying stupid stuff like "he's old and ugly" or "he's senile" and coming up with clever nicknames like "McSame" and "McLame." Stuff like that rarely appeals to me.

Was I overly protective? Of course I was. Like I said, you feel like you know somebody, you're inclined to take up for them if you feel that they're getting short-shrift. It has to be said, even when I was squarely in McCain's corner I never got that worked up about the prospect that Obama might win instead. Either way, it was getting harder and harder to maintain any kind of enthusiasm.

Then I came up with a secret plan: I was going to publicly disavow McCain but still vote for him in secret. It's only one vote, right? As long as I tell people that I'm not doing it, I can still do it in the privacy of the voting booth.

That plan didn't last. It just got to be too much. McCain was becoming an embarrassment. I felt dirty every time I saw one of his ads. I turned off the television when he came on. He spoke with the enthusiasm of a guy recording a ransom tape. I firmly believe that he didn't get to run the campaign that he wanted to, but he still ran it. I don't think that he's a racist and I don't think he believes that Obama is a Muslim. But he enables racists and people who think that Obama is a Muslim, and that's almost as bad. Whatever principles he may have once had, they were now gone.

I know why he did all of this, but knowing the why doesn't make it any more palatable. John McCain came so close in 2000, only to be brought low by agents in his own party. Whatever it was that broke inside him, it was never going to be fixed. He became determined to win at any cost, no matter how it tarnished his reputation and his legacy. The worst part of this fall from grace is that it's all going to go for nothing. The only thing worse than selling your soul is selling your soul and still losing.

I think we all know what his biggest mistake was. Her. She. Sarah Palin. This is the one that did it for me, even though I was pretty much already done. It was all over but the shouting even before McCain picked Palin, but this just crystallized the whole experience for me. She, more than anything else, epitomized the depths to which John McCain would sink. I couldn't take it any more. I couldn't make any more excuses.

And you know what? I shouldn't have to make excuses. In spite of the fact that I'd made myself a promise to vote for McCain if the opportunity ever presented itself, what would be the point? What would be the point of making excuses for someone who I no longer feel any empathy for? I don't agree with Obama on everything either, but the balance had simply shifted too far away from John McCain, and it was never going to shift back.

I'm never going to be a dyed-in-the-wool liberal Democrat, but I do share a lot of their beliefs. There's no use pretending that I don't have these beliefs. There's no use contorting myself with mental gymnastics just to remain loyal to a guy who no longer deserves my loyalty. Mental gymnastics are really tiring. Making excuses for the McCain campaign was too excruciating, and I wasn't being honest with myself anymore.

I don't think that every Republican is a racist and a homophobe, but the reality is clear: more racists and homophobes belong to that party than belong to the Democratic party. Why should I be OK with that? I'm not comfortable with these elements, so why make any more excuses? I'm a grown-ass man. I support a smaller government and a strong defense, but not as much as I support the rights of gays and women. I support the rights of gun owners, but I also think people should be able to smoke weed when they feel like it. I'd rather not have to choose which ones to keep and which to jettison, but there isn't really a party that suits all of my needs. I have to go with the party and the candidate that comes the closest.

A couple of weeks ago, I saw Gen. Colin Powell on Meet The Press. Gen. Powell was making an appearance to announce his endorsement for Barack Obama. Powell gave an incredibly thoughtful interview, making a beautiful case for his endorsement. And it felt like he was reading my mind. He expressed so much of the same disappointment that I was feeling towards John McCain. He made the same observations that I had made about the negativity of the campaign. He expressed great admiration for McCain as a man, but couldn't support him as a candidate for President. So it was with great effort and consideration that he threw his support behind Senator Obama. Powell's friendship with McCain was undoubtedly going to suffer, but something had to give. Powell never fails to impress me.

Rush Limbaugh pounced on the announcement immediately, and said that Powell was supporting Obama because... he's black. Can you imagine? Powell had given such a heartfelt speech, and it obviously pained him to see his friend John McCain acting so shamefully. Endorsing Obama was not a decision made lightly. And all Rush could come up with was that it was done because Obama is black. Pathetic. I didn't really need any more convincing, but if I had this would have done it.

I got one more e-mail from the GOP. I wrote back to them, telling them that they no longer had my vote. I unsubscribed from their newsletter. I sent one last donation to McCain. Loyalty is a screwy thing. That was my parting gift. You can have my donation, but you're not getting my vote.

I'm going to vote for Barack Obama. In case you hadn't noticed, it took me a long time to get here. I don't think he's a perfect candidate, but I do think he's the right one for the times. He's smarter than McCain, and has a more even temperament. He has better ideas. Do I think he can do everything that he's promised? Of course not. I would still rather have a candidate who promised everything and delivered a mere fraction of it than a candidate who promised nothing and also delivered nothing.

There are a lot of reasons it took me this long, and not all of them have to do with loyalty to McCain. I first became really aware of Obama last year when Don Imus was fired. I understood why Imus was in trouble, but I didn't think he should have been fired. Obama did. Even worse than this, though, was that he waited a week to decide. He waited to see how everyone else felt, then decided that he, too, was upset. I thought it was chilling that a soon-to-be Presidential candidate was calling for the firing of a radio host based on a failed joke. I thought it was even lamer that Obama had to wait so long to weigh in if he was really so offended by it. He had clearly considered all of the political options and ramifications, acted on them, and then pretended that was the result of great conviction. Which is fine, butdon't then come out and act like you were really so hurt all along. That was my first negative impression.

I also had a tough time getting past the fans. They can be a little ridiculous. I'll be the first to recognize that Obama's personal magnetism is formidable, but I really have no interest in listening to people tell me that he's "hot." Come on now. Let's settle down. He's better-looking than John McCain, yes. He's thinner, younger, and better-looking than your average Senator, yes. But... hot? Be serious. It's not like he's Blair Underwood or Denzel Washington or Will Smith. You can find his personality attractive and be swayed by his charisma, but "hotness" is based on aesthetics. Aesthetically, he's just OK.

I was annoyed by the slogans. Hope and Change, I know. I get it. Yes We Can, yeah yeah yeah. What else do you have? Those are just t-shirts. What about answers and ideas? Eventually, he did get around to the ideas, and they were pretty good. But the Hope and Change stuff really wore me out. I understood that political slogans are always meant to be simplistic, but this was taking it to the extreme. The rock star stuff was really annoying. I understood where it was coming from, and it was certainly nice to have a candidate who wasn't John Kerry, but it was very exhausting for the vacillating voter that was me.

I was fairly mortified when Jeremiah Wright's comments came to light. I honestly didn't think that Obama would survive that. I saw way too much justification coming from his supporters. It reminded me of my own endless apologias for McCain. Some things are just wrong, and I didn't like hearing excuses for this stuff. Even while I was feeling disgust at the spin, I recognized that this was the same kind of overly-defensive behavior that I was guilty of.

Obama weathered that storm, and weathered all of the others as well. Like I said, I don't think he's perfect. He's said some things that I don't agree with, and he's broken some promises already. This was bound to happen. It will happen more in the future. Politicians are not perfect. But just because a candidate isn't perfect doesn't mean you should choose the even less-perfect option.

Tomorrow morning, April and I are going to pull the lever for Obama. Our support will be there. Once I'm there for somebody, I'm there. I have optimism. It's guarded optimism, but optimism just the same. It won't be a blank check endorsement, nor should it be. I want Obama to succeed in the worst way. I want things to get better. I'm going to pay close attention. If he screws up, I'll say so. If he does good, I'll say so. Here's hoping things get better. You might not know this about me, but I'm a hopeless romantic.

Ultimately, what would make me feel better? Seeing John McCain, a former favorite of mine, use loathsome tactics and pandering to secure a job that he doesn't deserve? Sarah Palin, a spectacularly unqualified fool, as the Vice President? Or Barack Obama, a brilliant campaigner and an even-tempered politician, motivating millions of new voters to get out and make a difference? He might not be a great President, but he's the best choice. After the last eight years, Obama is certainly worth a shot. The potential, at least, is there. He may be great.

What would I rather? Would I rather see racists and homophobes making one last push to keep the Muslim terrorist out of office? Or seeing millions of black Americans weeping openly in celebration, knowing that they had finally arrived? What sends a better message to the rest of the world? What would make me feel better about my country? Even when I was hardcore McCain, I still felt (deep down) that it would be kind of great if Obama won.

I would rather see this woman weeping tears of joy. It's time.



Or, as Rush would say, I'm just voting for Obama because he's black.

P.S. Please vote No on Proposition 8. This is the most important initiative on the ballot.

Celebrity Lookalikes, political roundup edition

They'll give anyone a radio show.
According to Sean Hannity, McCain's biggest problem this election cycle is that he (McCain) didn't run a negative enough campaign.
I'd like to repeat that.
According to Sean Hannity, McCain should have run a more negative campaign. That would have tipped this thing in his favor. Rush Limbaugh has been saying the same thing. They both wish McCain would have brought up Rev. Wright a lot more. Yeah, thanks guys. While I certainly don't have a lot of good things to say about Jeremiah Wright, that shit was already aired out and dealt with 6 months ago.
Desperation does not smell good.
Anyway, have fun Rush and Sean. Irrelevancy can't catch up with you quickly enough.

When someone tells you that there are no viable third party candidates, I want you to show them this-
Your Green Party candidate for President, Cynthia McKinney!



Urgh.