ol' slick wants ta take this here moment in time....ta just say over the last few passin's a the moon ..why I been on the side a privileged an pertinear proud a the fact that some folk out there..in there where ever either space time continuum a space..here..have been followin' the trials an tribulations a ol'slick,ol'betty..ol'betty in the flesh an now it would be seemin' lil'slicker as in the well..on an any way

I just wanted ta say thanks an well.....i'll just be wishin' ya'll the best a every darn thing that ya'll want..an well...ol'slick is gonna hunker on down with a prepared bag a gerome a tray a alien whiskey an toast ta ya all the best...c ya...Slick Black truck drivin' man...

...an with that, well...i stumbled my way out ta ol'betty..the rig that is ,with lil'slicker in tow an all a them creature types right on behind with ol'Bob at the head with the flesh an blood ol'betty just a danglin' off his arm liken to a cheap braclet.ever one got inta them rigs as they were drivin' an the lil'slicker climbed on in ta ol'betty..the rig.. like she had been at the hand a this for the ever..as I was firin' ol'betty up Bob climbs on the runnin' board an say's..”ya take off that there direction an the road breaks off inta two ways y'all vier off ta the right an we'll be right on behind..” an I looked at bob an said..”right strange with me all in the lead as such..thought you bein the head boss man would let none lead as you may..”

an the ire was raised like the stakes in the big poker match up...an Bob just grunts..”just head on out....” an there was another bit a verbiage but the wind swept it off into another story all together..so with ol' betty fired an the lil'slicker in that there passenger seat we was off...the silence in the cab was getting ta be too loud so's I reached on over an clicked the remote an 'patsy' started singing bout walkin' after ...as them words were issuin' forth from 'patsy' the lil'slicker finished just as sweet as can be...i turned me my head that way an the look upon my face was ta be sayin' a lot an the lil'slicker got all red an then burst out..”..why we all can like us some patsy mr.slick...”..an the way it was ,was ta tear at me an then I knew this here was kin an damn...just as I was ta venture upon the path a admittance the oder an color a blue just a started ta become an then as has been the regular a my life in pop's my alien hairdo..whiskey an all...an ta top the top a it..say's in that way they have a sayin..howdy lil'slicker ..an then lil'slicker say's right on back..”howdy” an I blacked out...........

man I was flyin' an so's ya can understand my confusion when I took me some notice a the creatures that had taken up habitat in the roadside roadhouse...some very peculiar folk an in the middle sat ol'Bob with the flesh an blood Betty just a leanin in an appearin ta be whisperin' sweet nothin's ta bob an the little one lookin' on...it was the rest a them that was getting' me..was ta remind me a long ago walkin' in on them criminal types at a stop so long ago..but they weren't them same ones an by the look these creatures had seen them some rough spell's in the livin' a their lives..an Bob..well he sat there like he was the man an so's it appeared ta be so..but Bob weren't keen on the prepared bag a gerome's bein' in the pocket an so's he was expectin' me ta be dumbed down from that special slop the little one had brought..so's I played me some posum an acted in unawares..so's Bob says “how ya'll feelin'..” an I say's “well not of the best I been but..” an he say's “well ya'll ready ta draw this picture ta a close?”

an I say's back..”i'm on the road a doubt bout that event ever occurin' the way this here trip has been goin' so far an now that I done seen what I seen... well hell Bob i'd just as soon be at the far end a the fishin' pole at the waterin' pool a life with no bait than be stuck on this hiway with the likes a ya'll ..but bein' that I aint got no control over it..i's guess we best be at the next stop...so what ya'll got in that puny lil' ol' head a yours...” an he say's ..”well slick it aint that I care for the look a ya niether but I'm just as bound by this as ya'll an the sooner it be done the better...ya sure ya'll are alright..??”an so's I ask..”why would that be Bob..was ya expectin' a new scratch upon my face or was ya'll expectin' me ta be droolin' by now..”..an the look on his face carried a price no man could pay...kinda like caught in the act a stealin' from the henhouse by a shotgun totin' farmer..an he say's “why no slick why no...”so's I say...”what's the next step on this here path...” an he say's ..” we got us some distance ta be puttin' unnerneath that rig an all..” an then the flesh an blood Betty get's that there lil'ol' grin an say's..”tell me slick do ya still call her ol'betty???”..an the red colored my face an before my reply could fill the air she say's ..”thought so..” an then Bob say's ..”ya'll have ta follow all a us...” as he glanced about at them creatures..an I thought ah..hell they gonna be there an my bet would be some one a them will be takin' up a seat in ol'betty an the thought irked me ta no end.an as I was bein' in the way a irked Bob say's..”ya'll gonna have ta have you a rider with ya'll ta make sure ya don't get confused an lost...” an he looks at the flesh an blood Betty with a smirk a shotgun coulda wiped easily from that ugly face..an I thought ah swell..won't that be a joyous occasion ta have her back in the passenger seat,an before I could register any comment Bob say's..” I'm thinkin' the lil' slicker will be with ya..” an I done almost fell an the lil'slicker started at laughin' an with that ..................

....when i figured ol' Bob was gonna lay me flat , that ugly face a his broke a smile an down went the weapon an out came his hand...i meant ta shake it an just as I was gettin' it up ta do that, the little one came back with another whiskey..Bob say's..”ya'll still drinkin' that slop...”..i say's “ya...what be the wrong in it?...he looks across at that little one an say's..”hey lil' slicker go on get us some a that special sauce an be quik..” my face was not all turned toward Bob but when I heard me that there nick name..well it was all I could do an just as it were in the light a my eye,Bob breaks out with that big ol' girly laugh a his an see's the look on my face an laugh's even more..”don't even recognize your own kin there huh slick?”...an i'm thinkin' real hard back ta the flesh an blood betty, an then my inner clock starts ta tick off the time an then it got me red...Betty never did mention the situation...an I knew her leavin' was quik an all but....then she was a right pretty lil' thing an with my looks well buried (it was for her best),but mine...hum...time does shift gears on a soul without the knowin' a time bein on the wane. But like most a my kin..they was unknown ta me until their need ta know me arose...an so I started ta think what the hell was gonna happen next an so's I drank heavily an waited for the ball ta drop...Bob eyein' me like a hunter eyein' his kill an it unnerved me..ta the point a irritation...so turnin ta the matter at hand...which a course had ta do with my alien friend an daisy may an BOB..i asked a ol'Bob “ta what matter is the likes a you involved in this hoodoo truck job...”an Bob say's..” why slick it was me that sought out ya'll as the delivery man a such an important cargo as is with ya'll “...ok ok now i'm getting a lil' on the side a suspicious an mad all about at the same time...an wishin' I could be talkin' at my alien hairdo friend right at the present instead a this roadhouse filled with some ugly skeleton's...an outta the corner a my eye lookin' at the little one an thinkin' hum...maybe..when Betty comes round the corner an purchases her self the corner a Bob's chair an then it was to much an I spurt out..”you two????you two???damn...you two?????” Betty say's back in that snarl so familiar...”what you all in a craw for slick you an me aint been in the ring for a spell now an well Bob here treats me fine...” I say..”fine all fine my best a wishes for the happy couple...” an the toppin'it off the little one comes back with 4 glass's an sit's...then pours an then sit's an then slams down one an say's here's ta ol'slick...damn kids...an just in fashion Betty an Bob slam it down an then ..well hell I was part a the party so's down it goes...then round 2 an then 3 an then 4 an then 5 an so on...till I fall flat on the floor an hear Bob just a laughin...so's I crawled back up excused myself an went in ta the mens room..visited the ta go bag a gerome an popped me some help an by the time I got back..................

...with a swagger an non-nonchalant grace came inta my view none than the other woman who once occupied the passenger seat a ol'betty....ol'betty the flesh version....an my mind wandered ..did it ever..an I was wishin' it had wandered ta a different reality all it's own ..but no..there in the front a me starin' with that look that I know ..ol'betty...”so's betty what the hell ya all doin' in this here neck a them woods..?..i thought you was back up yonder an bein' in the way a the lamb...?”...well she stares for a spell then say's “well on no account a you am I ta be standin' at all an the thought damn near freezes me ta look at ya..”..an I had ta say..”now ya'll know it weren't in my hands ta change the state a things an if'n you an mexico bob hadn't a pulled that there maneuverer a yours well things might a been born on the other side an the like...”...”ah hell slick you talk in circles like one a them little doggies at that circus on them lil' ol' bikes..shit you do spin about..”..”now betty ya can't be spoutin' forth such drivel ya'll know where the light shines an where them shadows swallow up the rest an don't be all coy an such..ya took the road a your own accord....now who is the little one? An then where is Bob?”...an that god damn laugh.....”the little one”.. spewin' from them lips a ice.....”ah slick...the little one!!!!!!..”...an just as my ire was bein' raised them doors swung wide with the bravado a some ancient has been western movie star...an in comes Bob....well well well...Mexico Bob...imagine that could ya...an if'n I had the chance, would never had done that...bob an me go back, way back,an if'n I could've, i'd a rang his neck dry an then left him a layin' in the hot sun all a dyin'...other than that I kinda liked him.......so slammin as many whiskeys as a man could in the moments a his life most lightly treaded upon, I looked at bob an couldn't help myselve but ta start laughin' an a laughin'...it ired ol'Bob an he done pull's out a gun..an with that I start me a laughin' even harder an just when...........

now in my truck drivin' career so's ta speak..i have encountered the most bizarre an the most ridiculous a situation's an come thru unscathed..but luck an the practice there of ,aint in the hands a no man ,an rest's like the wind ever blowin' past at a rapid rate an only when ya reach out ta grab it does it just slip away...or somethin' ta that effect..so it was in this waxin' mode that I formulated my approach ta these here headlights a comin' on,an memory flashed back at me the time I done pulled over in a state a wtf..an was handed a thumb an note an well..here i'am again...so's the idea a direct confrontation seemed out an with that the idea sprang forth like a well at spring time ta water down them fields an stoppin it was..at a prime in your face mexican roadhouse or mi'casa' ta me..an in we pulled..an in the road dust came the light's...but ol' betty an me had done stopped an got out an went in an saw the history a the roadhouse in one quick glance...bout 5 ½ tables were scattered about an at 1 was a mean lookin' ol hombre with his hat down an his shot glass raised ta repeat the same night over an over..at another sat some bewildered tourist who missed the right exit an most than likely will never see home in them same eyes again wishin' an a clickin' them heels..the barkeep was pourin' shot's whilst holdin a shotgun across his shoulder..an I tipped quite finely that night..at another sat a mexican version a me an I turned my glance away asap...so's I sauntered on over an grabbed the ½ table an the girl comes on over..an she says “senior el'slick...been long long time....”...”uh ya why it has mam...”(strainin' my brain for recognition an no it weren't there)...”senior slick..you must not recognize that of kin...”..”kin? Why ms. Ya'll have me at a loss...but while I try ta focus upon such a thing is it in the realm a possible ta refresh my throat with a liquid beguilement ..uh..such as a..”..”whiskey” she says..”or would that be of a alien nature to you mr.slick..”...”uh why yes i mean no ..but I do ponder the reason a your familiarity with my name sake..”..well mr slick while you walk down that path I will bring you some of our finest whiskey an then maybe you will be enlightened..”..an I was thinkin' drunk would be better an then as it always does, life smacks ya right upside the head..as it just did when them saloon doors went swingin' open an in walks none other than...

now crossin' south a the border..well hell lets face it who ever smuggles anythin' into mexico....an so's the getting' in is the easy life...but getting' back out ...well...it may be costly if'n one is in the way a not wantin' ta draw attention ta oneself an the cargo bein' in the way a delivery...so's when ol'betty an I was comin' on close ,it was in my mind ta be on the unawares bein' that I was goin' in...but as we was decendin' speeds unknown before now ta the earth..it hit liken ta a lead balloon bein in the way a savin' your ass if'n ya neaqded ta fly in escape.....an well...it hit upon my smitten face that we was loaded right prior ta leavin' an it had behoved me ta get the dirt on the load an so's I was in the unawares state that I came ramroddin' into the border crossin'..an doin' a slide bleedin' skid upon said approach was not in the eyesight a hidden an so's this was the effect placed inta the state a mind a the border guards..

truck drivin' man gone wild...so's as them border guards with an exaggerated sense a position done did the ritual hand raisin' in the international sign a STOP..we did..they approached with that look a “i know you all illegal an we are gonna find out how bad...” set firm on the chiseled jaw...an said them ill fated words every truck drivin' man in the international truck drivin' man's local hates ta hear...'”whats in the rig..'or' what ya haulin' in there...” they all expect the worst an well...sometimes they should....so's with nothin' ta do but wing it,i reached down an grabbed the paper work an the said 'bill a laden' pulled it up ta my face...kinda squinted ta draw me some time an looked at that there 'bill a laden' an spoke right off a that 'bill a laden' an said...”tiny toy helicopters...2000 of'em”...now sayin' it don't make it so ..but I was a wishin' ta all hell it be so then an..with a slight twist a the lip the border guard looked at me an kinda chuckled his remark..” a load a toy's huh'”...an I said back 'well ya that's what it say's”...he said open it an I said .....ooooooooookaaaaaaaaaaay...what ever else at hand was not bein' shown an so's with the stagger a the not-so-confident ,i climbed on down an then swaggered my way on back..takin' my time without the look a takin' my time..an why was way beyond as I knew if it weren't so...that bein' the look a toy helicopters reflectin' it's tiny image as we opened them door's..an bein' some other form a contraband an illegals,lookin back at us that ol'slick would be up the river in a sinkin' boat..let alone paddles..so as them doors swung wide what was ta be seen was hundreds a boxes a tiny toy helicopters from 'the tiny toy helicopters are us Co'...an as i looked at the guard his disappointment shown like bad teeth on ms.universe...so's he angrily say's “so where are ya goin' “...an I told him bout the shy town south..an he said “well get the damn thing outta here..hear?”...yes sir I reply an get back in ol'betty fire the girl up an pull on out...the navigatin' left ta me was on memory as we hit the first turn an outta the mind came the run I made with Mexico bob...never again is all I can say...an as that thought was doin a pinball in my head the sight a headlamps a comin ' from behind at a rapid rate was ta take me inta mexico an the dangers there of...with that ol'moon shinin' down an the mexican breeze blowin' it was with my hand on my protection that I saw them headlamps comin' on....

so's after bein' on the road for the spell i'd been...it was seamin' time ta figure just what the hell I was up to...an ta re-collect the thought that done drove me forward an movin' in the at all....an there aint nothin' better ta unearth the earthly secrets than on a drug induced hangover...well...lets say the prescribed pre-pared bag a gerome...an after all i'm sure he's liscensed somewhere...for somethin..or another...an I was on a mission from unearthly type folk an all...earthly...unearthly....sorta hit's a mark someplace..that big ol' ball a cosmic dirt that the almighty uses as his own #7 Harts along with the rest as he hits the daily round a golf..universal style....i mean what else are we here for.....it suit's don't it...i mean the other possibility is we all just prisoners from outlaw planets an this here is the universal equal ta Botany Bay there for them British ta discard the ones not welcome..we were all expelled from the universe an deposited here ta be kept from the others not so inclined ta violence...we just gotta figure it all out...doin' just fine thanks....but aside...way aside... it was ta be upon my horizon the seein' a the Mexican border an then off ta some dirt floor hovel in which I was ta find out what would be the next phase a my so called truck drivin' mans life...ahh..poor ol'slick....aint no way outta here is there...i had me some time in front a me an so's I decided ta get into character an tuned inta the latest hit factory a the famous mexican radio...'stereo ray'.............an I cleared my head........not to much now............

woke up on the meridian goin' well over 200 miles per the hour a life,an it was just a tickin' on by like I was just a standin ' still..seems I had me a bit more than a handful a them there pill's from the prepared bag a Gerome..an in the state I was in, well...just damn near anythin' can happen...an it may well of...I'll regale ya with it if'n my mind allows me ta recall it....so's with a HUGE handful a them there pill's chased by copious quantities a whiskey..ahhhh...sounds good even now...but...it would appear that ol'betty an I went a lil' off course..an ended up in some shy town with just enough ta get by on callin' it a town an well...as in all god forsaken lil' ol' towns on the outskirts a hell...lookin' like at one point quite a success ta the ma an pa joints sproutin' like weeds ta break apart the concrete that makes up this here highway system I travel upon..but..then dyin' on the vine like fruit waitin' ta be ate but endin' up on the ground like so much other..tossed away..um..any ol' way like any good lil' shy town, it had it's local waterin' hole an well as high as I was ta be ,liquid sounded mighty fine an so's with a slide bleedin' skid ol' betty an I, why we went on in...an when I say we, I mean in the particular me an ol'betty...seem's I musta miss judged the distance in the slide bleedin' skid stoppin' point an well...over shot the mark by 6 barstool's an ta the unfortunate 4 were occupied...well ya can just imagine the look on some a them faces as ol' betty up on 9 a the 18 god gave the great graces in which ta put under her , wheels, in the midst a a slide bleedin' stop..well I pertinear fell outta the cab just a laughin'...but the cook didn't quite see it that a way an as he came flyin' across that counter...butcher knife in hand..with the look a the old sailor's boardin' a privateer an slaughterin' the crew with pick axes an pike poles..an the like...an that made the next move of the some what important kind..like livin' longer ta consume more a the prepared bag ..oh an finishin' the job at hand..an the like ..an so's with that all in mind..i slammed the shiftin' stick inta back-up mode real quik..an ol'betty an I extricated ourselves..an on the way got ourselves an order ta go...heard 'bout it later that night on the radio as” a mysterious thing happened on the highway tonight....but them faces..worth it all...an well......

....after a spell a fine drivin'...i put ol' betty on the auto pilot she and I had worked out..the way it was ,was like this ..ol'betty would just cruise at speed an hold the wheel right..bein' well balanced an all..an she would just'a highball until a turn would come on the rise an she would bounce off a them lil' bumps an alert me ta the cause...never failed as a yet an she an I get along just fine ol'betty an ol'slick...so's with that underway it was ta give me some ponderin' time on them words left branded across my brain by that a ol'Daisy may...”give my best ta Mexico bob....i knew I was a goin' south a the border an it had crossed my mind that Mexico bob might be in the near but puttin' the 2 together ..well it has been a little hard on ol'slick as of late an so...without any prepared bag a Gerome left ta my name it was of the natural state that this game was bein' played so's ta speak..now the facts as they lay there on the ground starin' back in a pitiful way was these..them alien's were involved an then it hit...i was in the cab a ol'betty alone...without no hairdo ta be seen...that was also now a fact a layin' there an it was a mighty big one at that...but..then the other was whiskey was in the involvement an then south a the border was in an now it would appear ol' Mexico bob was ta be there as well.. so's quite a little ta be had...but knowin' these things was not helpin' answer the query that was set forth in the front a my forward movement...but also knowin' that nothin' I was gonna be able ta do was gonna change the outcome if'n I knew my clan, an I knew my clan....one an all...the bad,the not so good,an the worse...an as I settled inta my resolve ta just enjoy the hell outta the moment here..in pop's my alien hairdo friend..an I can now call her,it,the alien,friend..an she don't just pop in..these type got the grand entrance thing down..all a blue glowin'..electricity a poppin'..an then pop there it,she, the alien, sit's ,well floats..well ,inhabits the passenger seat a ol'betty....an ta top it off...with a tray a whiskey an ta my eye's a sight ta sore'em...a prepared bag with that unmistakeable look a gerome all about...man I smiled....the thought appeared that Gerome thought I may be in need...an so did them aliens'''all come ta the rescue a ol'slick...so's as I dipped deep inta the prepared bag an pulled me out a handful I grab a shot,an  tossed them lil'pills in the air caught'em in the mouth an tossed that shot right in after it an they both went on down....smooth...fine alien whiskey an Gerome....an mexico a callin' an shinin' it's fine light upon the horizon into which i was a headin'..."was way south a the border..."




slicks recipe corner....

take two a them most happy chickens...
kill'em,clean'em
mix soy an oarnge marmalde..
lite the q
burn coal
fry them babies slatherin' the mix upon 'em
take your sweetie an a jug a wine
an well ya'll know the rest..
c ya