Well, I can say now...
goodbye.
If you're reading this... I just want you to remember:
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SCREENNAMEWITHHELDFORSECURITY (12:38:19 AM): last night i couldnt sleep because i knew i fucked up right, and didnt tell you how i really felt because i was being a bitch, and got scared at the whole "NAME i want to be with you for the rest of my life" bit, and i stayed up lisening to every song that reminded me of you
SCREENNAMEWITHHELDFORSECURITY (12:38:28 AM): Anchor the night, open the sky
Hide in the hours before sunrise
Pray for me not, I won't lose sight
Of where I belong and where you lie
SCREENNAMEWITHHELDFORSECURITY (12:38:35 AM): and cried for like hours
SCREENNAMEWITHHELDFORSECURITY (12:38:50 AM): the jacket i borrowed back
SCREENNAMEWITHHELDFORSECURITY (12:39:02 AM): smells like you and its what got me to sleep
I don't think I'll be able to listen to that song anymore. But that's okay.
We had some good times kiddo, and I regret very little.
I'm not going to talk about the people that got in the way, I'm not going to talk about the angry things we said, because honestly, it doesn't matter to me. Remember, my mood as I write this, is hopeful, liberated, even perhaps, nostalgic. I will however, talk about when we spoke of this day, as we knew it would come.
I remember, we lie there, in a hammock, in the town of Woonsocket, the fear hanging over our heads like an omen. We had childish aspirations of never giving up... we found ourselves to be so similar.
I won't speak of the times we were unsure, when we didn't know what we were, or even what we had. I will speak of however, the times we were sure of what we had.
We sat there, in a hospital waiting room, together. Before things became complicated. When everything was pure. When everything was good. Remember, as I write this, I feel good, I feel content, I feel free. You too, can be content in the fact that I still consider that to be one of the best days of my life.
And you, one of the best things that have ever happened to me.
However, as we know, all good things must come to an end, if I may be so cliche. I laugh.
Before, I was being untruthful. In writing this, I regret nothing. What we had, was good. I'm not sorry for any of it, and I won't speak of the future, for even I do not know what it holds. But the end is simply the true destiny of all things.
I feel no hate, no spite, no anger. This is the truth. I won't say I feel no pain, for that would be a lie.
I feel... free.
This is how I truly feel.
And I didn't even use the word "love".