http://joesickraps.blogspot.com/
all updates and things of that nature
 
swazzy

Never talk about what you're gonna do, take action and then let other's discuss your work.
 
swazzy

If you ever need a reason to remain grounded no matter how well you do in life, remember this.  "A bird can poop on you then fly away, and you can do nothing about it." 
 
Thoughts? 

Swazzy

I'm sure we've all seen the "To Catch a Predator," show with Chris Hansen by now.  But, yesterday on MSNBC they showed the Predator Bowl, in reference to the super bowl.  Which basically was a non stop marathon of To Catch, for like 5 or so hrs.  Even though I have seen a good majority of the episodes it still had me on the floor dying.  I mean the way Chris Hansen speaks to the guys is enough, but then the dudes start getting all shook.
Chris Hansen: "Why dont you have a seat right there..."
Onlytheyoung_69socal *nervously* ummm...ok
Chris Hansen: "So what you doing here tonight?"
Onlytheyoung_69socal: I came to meet my friend.
Hansen: Who is that?
Onlytheyoung: ummmm I cant remember her name.
Hansen: How about Samantha.
Only: uh yeah thats her.
Hansen: How old are you?
Only: 26 (sidebar: they say 26 when they are 45 as if 26 is ANY better!)
Hansen: I see....*intense stare* you wanna try again?  This time the truth.
Only: I, uh, um am I under arrest?
Hansen: How old are you?
Only: 45
Hansen: How old did Sam say she was?
Only: 14
Only: I just came over to watch a movie or grab a burger or whatever.
Hansen: What you got there?
Only: 151, but I put water in it, its soooo watered down, you can even check it.
Hansen: so you didnt come here to have sex with a 14 yr old?
Only: I swear on my dead mother's mother's father's uncle's grave and my new born daughter and my wife, and her sister's and my in-laws lives I wasnt gonna do anything!
Hansen:  In this transcript it sure doesnt sound that way.  Do you like *blank* in your *blank*.  I wanna blank your little sweet spot and then we can blank in the shower.
Only: I was only just messing around, I was gonna turn around, but then I didnt wanna hurt her feelings, so I was gonna tell her in person that she shouldnt be doing this.
Hansen: Did you bring condoms?
Only: yeah, but I wasnt planning on anything, I just always have some just in case.
Hansen: Says here have you ever tried anal?  Dont worry I'll bring lubricant, it'll only hurt at first.  Well thats pretty considerate of you to think of bringing lube!
Only: I know what it sounds like, but I swear. *starts breaking down*
Hansen: Well, there is something you should know. I'm Chris Hansen with Dateline NBC and we're doing a story on computer predators, if you have anything you'd like to say we'd love to hear it, otherwise you're free to go.
Only: I'm sorry I'm just gonna go...*flies out the door only to be arrested*
the amount of times I laughed at this shit yesterday was equal to a Dave Chapelle stand up...Chris Hansen is THAT MAN!
 
Swazzy
 

I know most people know me for my blogs being funny and silly, but I'mma kick some real life shit on this one.  This could get a little wordy, so if you aint a wordy person you might wanna click out of this now.  Last Chance.
Ight, you know growing up you hear a lot of phrases about life.  You know "Life is like..." "80% of life is just showing up" "To be a success you must prepare..." and on and on.
Most of these things you to just sound like random sayings ppl found out of an old ass Chinese proverb book.  But, the older I get the more I realize most of these things are true.  Life really can be what you make it.  I say these things on the eve of Obama being sworn in.  You hear ppl talk about the haves and have nots.  Listen I was a have not if ever there was one, and have been that way more than twice.  But its up to you as an individual to dig yourself out.  Everyone needs a hand here and there.  But, you know why Michael Jordan won so much, because he worked his ass off when no one else was watching, and he put himself in the position to win.  Sure there are some people born with everything given to them.  But, most success stories are about ppl that PUT THEMSELF in position to win.  When you put yourself in the right position breaks will come your way.  But, not until you put in the work.
This to me relates to what Obama's message is, regardless of what his counterparts might have you believe.  They would have you to believe he's gonna come take a fist full of cash outta your pocket and drive around every poor community and make it rain in the streets. I think his message is if you are willing to work hard, and grind it out you can make your life what you want it to be.  There are people in my family that struggle but wont do anything about it.  They just pray and think that God is gonna provide.  Regardless of what religion or God you may or may not believe in I know this much.  You cannot just sit on your ass and just pray and think God is gonna drop a bag of cash down your chimmney.  Regardless of all these magical things you may have heard of in the bible, I dont believe God works this way.  Now, if you are down and out, but you are trying to do your best to get by, and you have faith thats when things make a turn for the better.
I can speak from experience, from getting outta jail with not a dollar to my name.  I had some very good friends look out for me, until I got back on my feet, and I never looked back since.  But, the point is I put myself into a position to win even straight out the joint, because I've been a stand up dude my whole life, so when shit got rugged for me I had some good karma coming my way.  I'm not saying this to say look at me I'm so great, far from it.  But, I just urge people in these coming yrs to look deeper in the mirror at themselves for the reason your current situation may be what it is.  And if its not what you would like then ask yourself why?  And what can you do to make it better.  People dont have goals anymore, and as I see a lot of my peers fall off in this music shit, and in life in general.  The saying is just as true when I first heard it as a young star.  Life is what you make it.
So if you dont believe that, watch Obama get sworn in and you can visually see walking and talking living proof.
Swazzy,
Star

Well its the day after and as I sit here its still an unreal feeling to me.  But, its real and I've never felt better.  I'm talking about the election of course.  I want black people to understand something though.  Racism is still prevalent in this country, and if you saw any number of YouTube videos you know what I mean.  It will always be here on some level.  Also, just because Obama is president doesn't mean we can kick our feet up.  Just because we have "Jamal" in the white house doesn't mean our fight is over.  This is just the start of what MLK was talking about not so long ago.  Having said that, to the youth don't ever ever ever let anyone tell you what you can and cant do.  Everyone has always heard the you can be anything you wanna be speech.  Well now for young black girls and boys it holds 100% true.  To America in general, we have only scratched the surface of what we can now do.  We have  the rest of the world listening again.  Let's try and make it something positive this time around.  We have officially taken a step forward in the right direction.  Let's move on from this backwoods way of thinking.  Those of you that voted for "the mac," he was very gracious in defeat and had he spoken with such dignity and not the animosity he seemed to build up the more it became evident he would lose, he may have had a good chance of winning.  But, its over now no one has a time machine.  Just like we didn't for the past eight years.  Just because we didn't vote for the same person doesn't mean that people cant respect each other.  It doesn't mean we can break bread together, get money together, and get tax cuts together (lol) most of y'all don't make 250k anyway so....Ha, but on the real I really think this is a step in the right direction.  To the troops, just know that you don't have to be over there for another 15 yrs.  You'll be able to come home to your families.  Its been a long time coming I'm sure.  Last but not least to Obama, I've followed you since 05' you talked about doing things differently.  But, so have a lot of other people, and then they get in office and its the same trick with a different dog.  For once I believe a good majority of people have spoken as to what they want and need.  It's up to you to really make things happen, and to hit the ground running.  Remember why the people voted for you.  I don't expect you to single handedly deliver every single person out the ghetto.  But, you can help make the playing field a little more even for the people coming behind us.  Because all anyone can ask for in life is a fair chance.  Before I'm done I forgot one more person.  To George Bush, there is nothing I can say about you or to you that hasnt been said.  So, I'll say this, enjoy that lame duck position you've been chilling in.  Spend a few more dollars on some bullshit.  Give a few more breaks to some big wig companies that dont need it.  And most importantly take a few more vacations, because I mean we all know that helping run a country into the ground is tiring work.  G Dub there is no reason to break these habits that you picked up over the past eight yrs.  I'm sure you will get whatever it is you deserve in life one way or another.

Swazzy

So, I was at the gym this morning and a bunch of funny shit occured to me.  So, I'm gonna break down the sterotypes of the gym.  But, make no mistake about it, anyone thats seen me without my shirt on understands why I was accused of being on HGH.  I mean real talk I was in the original Mitchell Report, but through my Greek connects I was able to get that snuffed out.  All of this is off the record of course.

1. Jock- we all know this dude.  He lifts with like 400lb dumbells and slams everything.  He more than likely is wearing a Hulk Hoganish tear away tank top.  More than likely it says something like Met-Rex on it.  He basically looks like ONE BIG MUSICLE.  He may also wear a headband.  He can also be spotted taking various supplements during his workout along with Protein shakes that he made in the water fountain.

Now a sub version of the Jock is the Top Heavy Jock.  He is the dude that is disel as fuck up top, but he refuses to do any leg workouts.  Therefore this niggas legs look like he standing on 2 pencils or some shit.  His legs have no definition whatsoever, looking like Referees with their hands up after a field goal is good.

2. The Strong Nerd-  Now this is the mothafucka I always beef with at the gym, cause dude is always doing some fly ass workout that I wanna try.  But, his shit is so intricate I'm not even sure what muscles it works out.  And he always does it right beside me.  Plus he's lightweight got some size on him, but he looks like a nerd, so you gotta size'em up even though he's paying no attention to you whatsoever.  Then he'll come beside you and do a variation of the shit you're doing, but his looks better and more meaningful.  Plus he has his little notebook and marks everything down.  He roughly spends like 1:47:18 secs in the gym M, Th, Fri, Sun.

The Twins- These are the dudes that come together and they normally wear some sort of cut off shirt that notifies you that they went to some sorta sports camp in middle and or high school.  Or, it also can be their old high school wrestling shirt.  So, it'll say something like Jamestown High Wrestling on the front.  This shirt will normall be any color from white, green, or black.  They will both be wearing the same athletic shorts.  Now I call these dudes the twins is because they have the exact same body type.  They weigh the same, are the same height and more than likely have sex with their girlfriends at the exact same time, for the exact amount of time.  They spot each other on the bench and offer the occasion encouragment that normally goes "comeon you got this, this is easy, one more baby, one more, good shit bro."  Normally the twins will be one white dude and the other will also either be a white dude OR a really light skinned black dude.  They've known each other since freshman yr and he was the only black dude that went to the school, so its cool.

The Old Strong Man-  I beef with this guy too, because all he wants to do is size ME up while I'm working out.  Like he wanna look like he's critquing my workout.  His skin is wrinkly as fuck, but he still wants to lift nothing but dead weights.  He's always wearing some blue or black wind breaker pants with an all white shirt tucked inside of his pants.  With all white reeboks that may have teal along the Reebok stripe.  He may or may not be widowed so his wife may be there or not.

The Strong woman-  she's not a lesbian but she's pretty strong, and she wants to always workout in the mirror.  Normally between two regular joes, to ensure that yes she is a woman and yes these are 30lb dumbells she's working out with.  She does EVERYTHING with dumbells.  She is normally wearing a sports bra, and stretch pants.  More than likely New Balance.  She may or may not be cute.  But, she is so into showing up men you can never really talk to her, plus her I-Pod is blasting to some fast 80's pop.

The Lesbian-  Now me and the lesbian end up being friends, because although she's butch in appearance she has some fem traits, and she is kinda cute.  So, you think MAYBE just MAYBE she might be into dudes in the right situation, plus you cant be for certain that she is the stud in the relationship.  She is always wearing red mesh shorts.  Air Max is her shoe of choice, if no Air Max is available then the Nike Shox will do.  The reason I become friends with her is because we both realize we're the minority in the gym, so it gives us common ground to laugh at the different variations of people.  Plus, it gives us confirmation that we are the normal ones not them.

The Lunch Break Business Man-  Well he comes in on his 2 and a half hr lunch break.  He normally carries a huge ass gym bag in order to be able to keep his work clothes nice.  Although his workout ritual is hard to pin down, one thing is certain.  He will be seen talking to another regular there or The Lunch Break Business Woman for roughly about 47% of his workout.  he even talks while he is working out, so I guess a case could be made that he talks 100% of the time.  When he is finished he will take a shower, and also shave.  After that he will strip down completely naked and put on his clothes.  While he is naked putting on his clothes he will normally be on his cell phone.  He will either be making a psuedo business call.  Or he will be talking to his 16 yr old daughter who didnt go to school today for some random reason like her Uncle from Spokane, Washington is coming to visit, and when he gets in you guys are going to dinner @ 7:30pm.  So, she took the day off to wait until his plane comes in at 5:30pm.

this is seriously some funny shit I noticed today.  The Gym= the 17th funniest place in the world.

 

Space Ghost