A final ahoy for me MS mates. If it weren't for the fact that I rarely see y'all (and would lose an easy way to track all my fav artist's releases/shows) I'd just delete my account right out.

As a final HUZZAH I'm merely fulfilling one of my favorite cliches and presenting a TOP 5 of ALL TIME in several categories, in order, aren't you just shaking in yer britches?!?! But seriously, these are things I enjoy to the fullest and it's an easy way to make recommends and share tastes.

Greatest Paintings:
5) The Picture of Dorian Gray by Ivan Albright
4) The Hallucinogenic Toreador by Salvador Dali
3) Composition VII by Vassily Kandinsky
2) Guernica by Picasso
1) The Sistine Chapel Cieling by Michaelango

Greatest All-Around Artists:
5) Beksinski
4) Basquiat
3) Klee
2) Dali
1) Leonardo da Vinci

Greatest Animators:
5) Brothers Quay
4) Glen Keene
3) Hayao Miyazaki
2) Katsuhiro Otomo
1) Jan Svankmajer

Greatest Filmmakers:
5) Herzog
4) Lynch
3) Gilliam
2) Kurosawa
1) Kubrick

Greatest Films:
5) Come and See
4) Ran
3) Blade Runner
2) The Bicycle Thief
1) 2001: A Space Odyssey

Greatest Short Films:
5) Un Chien Andelou (Bunuel/Dali)
4) Construction Cancellation Order (Otomo)
3) Lumiere and Company - David Lynch (Lynch)
2) The Street Sweeper (???)
1) Dimensions of Dialogue Parts I/II/III (Svankmajer)

Greatest Video Games:
5) Resident Evil 4 (GC)
4) Bubble Bobble (NES)
3) Half-Life 2 (Episode 1 too) (PC)
2) Deus Ex (PC)
1) Panzer Dragoon Saga (SATURN)

Most Overrated Video Games:
5) GTA: Vice City
4) GTA: San Andreas
3) Final Fantasy VII
2) Zelda: Twilight Pricess
1) Halo 2

Most Overrated Filmmakers:
5) Baz Lurhmann
4) Michael Bay
3) Tim Burton
2) Zack Snyder
1) Steven "The Beard" Spielberg

Can't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven. Y'know why else I'm toning this MS shit down? A significant percentage - like 90 - of potential employers admit to searching social networking sites and looking at profiles of applying employees. That's fucked up, yo. So if you're all up in my shit cause I just sent you a resume then you're a fucking wanker of an HR person. Real people know that work and play ain't the same spin of the electron, savvy?

Peace.

As my blog isn't contributing anything either completely useless, inane, self-centered, or otherwise narcissistic, I've decided it therefore contributes nothing to the blogosphere. "Blogosphere!!!" Har! Sounds like a monster truck. In any case, I'll be cleaning shop here on my MS blog, leaving a snippet or two about Ether. The only thing I plan to contribute to said generally-unqualified-writers'-realm (blogspace) is a continually-up-to-date musings on all things animation. This will be hosted over on Ether's site and I hope it adds something not at all like the majority of blog writing, which I've only experienced to be so full of first person pronouns and useless, uneducated opinions on the horrors of cilantro [yes, sometimes people have taste receptors genetically predisposed to taste the herb as bitter and gross instead of tasty and aromatic; get the fuck over it, and get the fuck off my internets. That is what clubs and t-shirts used to be fer.] BUT YES, you say, ARE YOU NOT BLOGGING RIGHT NOW? To which I say PEH! PITIFUL JABS and YON LOGIC HATH FAILED YE! For no, I expect nobody to read this, don't consider myself a writer for it, don't think my opinions represent more than myself,

E
T
C

In the meantime, fuck the blogosphere. Y'know, unless it's actually a cool blog. There's a few of those. I'm lookin' at you, mates. No bad words for yens who keep it simple, and use blogs for communicating ideas or keeping in touch collectively.

"But, blogs are the new way of communicating to the planet! It's an important tool to measure the wax and wane of humanity's many ideas and thoughts! Blogs are a new form of writing!" BULLSHIT. Glorified journals. Just because you can quantitatively measure something doesn't mean it HAS to be measured. For instance, if I see a tremendous, heaping, steaming, mountain of dung- I think "That's prolly about 12 tons of Dung." And I move on with my life. I don't call for a fucking front-bucket loader and a huge fucking scale. I'm done with blogs, and I can only hope that the major media will stop looking to blogs to measure just exactly how much shit you can pile up before it becomes a reputable source. It's still just shit folks. I'm not saying they've nothing to offer, it's just that -much like YouTube- the saturation and popularity climbed so fast, so easily. It just makes you wonder, is this shit really that big of a deal? Is it really going to last that long? Is this the best technology has to offer? Is this the best way to connect people- and most importantly, in many cases, should some people really have access to this kind of attention-whoring? And that's coming from an honest-to-gods optimist.

In any case, I equate it to the DV era, which I suppose is still going strong. People were questioning, "Should the average joe schmo really have access to this prosumer equipment? Making movies is so bloody cheap now, the market will oversaturate with crap!" And yes, to a point, that happened for a while. But the industry weeds itself out the good shit, just like any discerning audience. The balance was restored when the joe schmoes realized that making movies, really good movies, was crazy hard. Hell, I'm trained to make movies and I've really only produced one or two shorts. Good ones? Maybe, yeah. I'm gettin' there.) But yeah, sure, YouTube is full of craptastic crap and shitty stuff gets the limelight sometimes. I don't care. YouTube isn't a distribution model, and in lots of ways it's an excellent resource. People post nature videos, movement exercises, making-of bits, rare and hard-to-find gems. I guess what I'm getting at is that I'm trying- so hard- trying so hard to view blogs with that same attitude. It's just so bloody hard when Wolf Blitzer cuts to the web correspondant reading these blog posts as if the people writing them were fact-checked journalistic sources.

In any case, I'm soon to be off here, leaving this and a few Ether posts. After that, people who are interested in both my take on, and the history of, animation and film production, come on over to the Ether site. I'll try to keep it entertaining and not too fucking serious, yeah? Enjoy the backlog here while you can before it goes away, if you wish. I recommend the "I want to fucking kill somebody," posting, and anything related to reviews of films or games or music. EVERYTHING MUST GO! By the by, did you know that during and after the film UHF was shot, the sign for SPATULA CITY actually attracted real people, enough for them to pull off the highway and drive up to the empty building? HAahahahha, oh man. An entire warehouse dedicated to Spatulas?!?!? I guess I'd be going for it too. Can't never have enough spatulas.

As always, Peace.

When E3 rolls around and everyone who's anyone boasts about swag and Morgan Webb shouts her pretty little voice out over a crowd of rabid gamers. Smaller this year, thankfully devoid of depressing BoothBabe model/actress wannabes-- but still tons of news pouring from the industry. I'd like to throw some predictions out there:

1) Halo 3 can, like its immediate predecessor, kiss my ass. I watched the trailer and the new jazzy-piano score is enough to scoff at in itself. But here we also have a tight, strong multiplayer title that everyone and his or her grandmother will overpay for, having forgotten the tired and trite drivel that the second game was. But yeah, good console multiplayer if you don't mind paying an extra sum for MSXBX Live on top of what you already pay your ISP to connect to the internet. And does the 360 support wireless networks in any and all of the console's multiple iterations? No. Still, it'll sell a billion copies and be up for game of the year. I got a good fill of multiplayer gaming on the ole PC, and not much has changed. Count me out.

2) Nintendo is leading and will continue to lead with its forward-minded approach that not every gamer has 8 hours a day to sit down and devote to titles. The Wii is unique and even tho it's called "the Wii," it's dominating sales. The DS is the highest- and fastest- selling system of all time, and between now and december over 120 new titles will be released. It seems Iwata, Reggie + co. have this generation locked down, but:

3) ...look out for the PS3. Still too expensive after the price drop, but now some important titles are knocking on gamer's doors. And wallets. MGS4 comes to mind. Besides, remember the launch of the PS2? Craptastic selection, too expensive, hardware issues, on and on. And that went on to be the strongest console of the last gen, so we'll see. I'm not putting any money on it, but if they can get sales up in Japan to compete with the Wii, they'll have an edge on the 360.

4) The Konami announcement I've been itching for: Akira Yamaoka is onboard to score Silent Hill V, which will be on the 360 and the PS3. The thought of next-gen Otherworld- with intestinal bits hanging from dissection cages clasped loosely to ceilings of moldering water damage- well it gets my blood flowing. But man, this gen is killing me with these prices.

5) GTA IV will rehash the same style of the prior GTA games, with prettier graphics and moderate enhancements to the sandbox gameplay. The storyline will be somewhere between a C-grade Ukrainian gangsta flick and an episode of Law and Order. Gamers will eat it up like candy and Jack Thompson will throw a hissy-fit.

6) Where the hell is Resident Evil 5? 4 was so freaking amazing... Come on Capcom, gimme some trailer goodness!

7) SEGA will continue its downward spiral of craptastic games, but there's a Wii version of Nights Into Dreams that should play amazingly well with motion controls. Man I hope they treat the ALIENS license with the respect it deserves. We need more space marine games, since id software seems a bit light on the innovation front. Tho they continue to be so developer/mod friendly they more than make up for it.

8) Fallout 3 will be the best game of 2008, so long as the combat system pleases everyone. Although if Spore keeps getting pushed back into 2008, Bethesda may not have a chance against the might of Will Wright. Spore is looking mighty fine.

9) Games will start coming out on the Mac, which is just weird but long overdue. And now that Macs run windows (and really well as far as I've seen,) we may see some gamers start the switch as well.

10) Episodic/Downloadable content will continue to thrive on the consoles thanks to MS Live, Sony Online, and the Wii's Virtual Console. Episodic content on the PC, well- it could be a make-or-break year. Sin Episodes was cancelled after ONE episode, HL2's episode 2 is taking way too freaking long, and really beyond Sam and Max there's really yet to be a proven episodic hit.

11) STARCRAFT 2.

Finally: HEY VALVE!! Can we have a Source Engine port of Deus Ex? Thanks.

That is all.

It's National Video Games Day, so pick an old favorite or a new classic and spend some quality time with it. I've got one or two to beat myself, having picked up Interplay's Fallout series in preparation for Bethesda Softworks' continuation of the franchise with Fallout 3 next year. It's also appropriate to purchase mass quantities of Pizza and sugar-laced, caffeine-heavy colas like Jolt and Brainwash, and of course some of the more gleefull boozes like Rum, Bourbon, and Champagne. Perhaps even roll a spliff if that's your thing.

So knock yourselves out, I know I will. Take a day to forget about all the bullshit that corporate America and the Federal Intrest Rates have modern rats racing over and immerse yourself in a new world or two.

Also, if you have time, give a few thoughts and hopes that another huge truck bomb doesn't go off somewhere in a busy market in the middle east. I try to do that every day without requiring CNN rubbernecking. Never seems to work though. Yesterday's huge truck bomb was utterly devastating.

It's 2007. Seven years ago this summer a game called Deus Ex came out and rocked the bloody piss out of every gamer, and more importantly, game designer, to date. And you know what? It still does. This fucker has rapidly taken my nomination for top 5 in the past but slowly it has proven to be the cream of the crop, unmistakably. Games try, games fail. It's got thrills, spills, chills, bleeps and creeps, and balls, great big yarblockos. Flamethrowers, darts, mutants, and conspiracy laced with conspiracy. Just like life! Except in this you're a superspy with elite hacking skills and whatnot, and you're in the middle.

You can choose diplomacy and stealth over action in almost every circumstance, and it is possible to beat the game without even firing a shot. Or, if you're like most people, you can choose to carry a GEP gun or a submachinegun around and blow the everliving shit out of everything.

Excelling in more than just the gameplay, the story is truly groundbreaking for interactive storytelling. The character dialogue and quest branches are deceptively simple for a game so rich in context and excecution. My second playthrough involved a bosslike-encounter that I had missed entirely in my first run because of the decisions I had made wiping that character off the story tree. And i realized that each character must have SO MANY alternate and branching lines of dialogue depending on the player's actions.

Brilliant game. Can't recommend it highly enough.

Interesting tidbits:

Much of the game's content makes reference to Greek mythology or history.

Due to the game's emphasis on allowing players the ability to search for different solutions to problems, it is actually possible to complete Deus Ex without drawing a gun.

Warren Spector wasn't very fond of the opening music. He was planning to tell the composer to come up with something else, but discovered that he couldn't get the tune out of his head. This convinced him to leave it as it was.

The entire game takes place at night - apart from when the helicopter picks you up at the end of the Hong Kong missions, which occurs in daylight.

After analyzing the Gray Death's molecular composition, Tracer Tong mentions that the viral structure is made up of multiples of 17 and 23. He then adds, "1723... the birthdate of Adam Weishaupt [founder of Bavarian Illuminati]." Weishaupt was in fact born in 1748.

Conspiracies are one of the main themes of Deus Ex, and the game draws heavily upon popular real world conspiracies for many of its plot elements. These include speculations regarding black helicopters, Area 51, Men in Black, cow mutilations, and other purported extraterrestrial related activity. Mysterious groups such as Majestic 12, the Illuminati, the Knights Templar, the Bilderberg Group and the Trilateral Commission also either play a central part in the plot, or are alluded to during the course of the game.

During sections of the game where the New York skyline is visible in the background, the two towers of the World Trade Center are noticeably missing; the real towers were destroyed a year after the game was released. Harvey Smith has explained that due to texture memory limitations, the portion of the skyline with the twin towers exists in the game's data files but had to be left out of the final game, with the other half mirrored in place of it. According to Smith, during the game's development, the developers justified the lack of the towers by stating that terrorists had destroyed the World Trade Center earlier in the game's storyline.

Why the post? Well, it looks to be getting another sequel, the first one of which (Invisible War) was pretty much a dissappointment. But hey! Here's to the future and to possibility. Cheers.

don't miss the greatmess of flims and flames coming from damelacksand streetknacks in antihumbling abodes of well-trothed bimb-crowse but with mails that shouldn't ring ( DINGO DANG) males that shoulnd't sing (RINGO RANG) and bales that couldn't be lifted by yer pitiful egomass (grate-mess) which sloughs all over selvsies like cold butter slake used-to cook but now wear invests of great wormth and unaidle yer privates fer sakes of yon privvies unbelting if yens abort un-fecals from yon kinderlings abed in unyoosed,

FORESAKEN,

brainmatters of then-ill descent 'cause oh! casein point, (inprescribed, DOF!) defense fortes (PALM ABSORBES TRIPLE {tequila} [shots] -with or without- salt IMPACT) despite infomation fault without blame or cartogrpher to YOU, DEAR REARDE, VISTIMS and BINTE , BOUNDERLESS SELFS of ill repute, all. "Y"zers! Whyszers? (HAR!) Har sayz me, alughers atchyase, at yaz chase, at chases yaz chasers (HAR!) fer yers saddems outways yer happems (STREET LOIFE) and by GOD science and religion are the same! (HAR! HARSIES AND POINTERS!) here! in yon JOYCE! doulve helix in structures, meaning, image, word, glossary, index. SCIENCE! (HAR!) SAMEZIES. lines. colors. words. MIND MEASURES MIND. irrevocably, unrevocalbies, MINED, immuned and innoculated (IRISH?) from outward trhuth.

Your blackboards always need chalk. Mine chalk. (VERBED!) Not possessive-pronouned (VERBED AGAIN!) and HAR! Kill yourself.

Not mine, mine's are dead. I killed mine, mine your own. INCINERATION!!!

YOR THE INSULt MASTER!!!!!!!!!!!!

D_F_NDZ YERSELVES.

DEAFEN(D)Z YERSELVS.

DEAFEN YOURSELVES (WITH YOUR) DEFENSES. {[(everyone's doing it man! GET STUPID WITH ME OR YOUR STUPD!!!) HAR !]} DO YOU SEE?! Possessives.

Wish your flaws on no one.

(Projectors) (Inhibitors) (Enablers) (NARCISSISTS) I don't wish my farkin slappers (interversions splintered into unsocietal melancholy backhoe gardener incapelers of communess safely) on yondery'alls (unmine-d-) greatmesses. my mess is mined-own and BY GODS i can say it with no great egorns being carried away by rightsquirrels. no greatbooks.

...I think now I can sleep.

Did you bury your fire?

YES SIR.

Did you cover your tracks?

YES SIR.

Did you bring your knife?

YES SIR.

Did you stay downwind?

YES SIR.

Did they see your face?

NO SIR.

Did the moon see you?

NO SIR.

Did you clean your rake?

YES SIR.

Did your carry your gun?

YES SIR.

Did you smuggle your rum?

YES SIR.

I said, How'd I know? How'd I know? ...How'd I know?

WELL I'M PLANNING ON BURYING MY DREAMS, GETTING A 9-5, BUYING A HUGE TELEVISION AND SURROUND SOUND SYSTEM, PUTTING A DOWN PAYMENT ON A LITTLE 2 BEDROOM PLACE, GETTING A YAPPY/DISOBEDIANT PET/WIFE, STARTING AN UNLOVING/DISOBEDIANT FAMILY/FOSTER SUPPLY, DOING DRUGS AND ALCOHOL CONTINUOUSLY, AND SUCKING CORPORATE COCK FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE.

Very good, slave. Er, knave. Eh, crave. Spade? Parade? Dammit! Everything coming to mind as your superior is painting a picture you are a tool and I control your life. You win.

I THINK YOU MEAN, "You lose."

Ah yes, that. We'll call it "judgementally impaired," until you die. Then we'll call it "a full li[f]e." (brackets enhanced -ed.)

OTHERS CALL IT A "LIE."

Who are these fabled "others?"

YOU WIN.

I think you mean, "I win."

THAT'S A MATTER OF SEMANTICS.

(Remember when you could still surprise people? You can always be like that. -THE MGT.)





[If anyone saw a midget run through here and blog on my computer, pretending to be two sides of an argument between a working citizen and society/government, please let me know the make and model. Of the midget, not the society. (we're talking about DEMOPROXY -ed.) GODDAMNIT!]


(this guy is totally a complete wanker -ed.)

Dude FUCK YOU. Wait which voice is this? [Does it look like my job to track that kind of crap? Get it?! JOB!!!] CLEVER. Right, very good old chap.

-MARKOFF CHANEY

[Man, that little dude is great.]

So anyway, I've applied for a job or two and if they read any of this crap I'm pretty sure they won't hire me. Cheers!

I don't do drugs. ( I AM DRUGS -ed.) Dude, STFU that's totally a Dali quote. YOU'RE SOBER AND TALKING TO ME?!?!? WOW! [shrugs] (art geek! total art geek -ed.) SHUT UP ED. HEY THAT WAS MY LINE. Well, when I yell it gets hard to differentiate. Actually it sounds like you're yelling all the time. THAT'S JUST MY SPEAKING VOICE, LAY OFF. [I'm tired. Why can't I sleep? OH. That's right! I have all these douchebags running around in my head!] (you should fire them as advisors- ed.) I swear to god Ed... WE AREN'T ADVISORS! No shit. [Hey, that's my line.]

{HEY FELLERS WHAT'S UP?!!??}

[Oh shit, I have to go.] ME TOO. I'm out.

{NOBODY LOVES ME.} (Well, maybe if you stopped yelling -ed.)

I think between 4 and 8 years ago the pentagon gave out a press release confirming that there was, in fact, a "shadow government," in place -though they said it was a measure to have things running in the event that the current government was wiped out. As opposed to some obsidian roundtable with rich, conpiratorial, cigar-smoking powermongers like MJ12 or The Illuminati or the Knights Templar or the Vatican or the Skull'n'Bones. Or... (You can't see me but I'm grinning madly.) I remember this press release well because my jaw hit the damn floor. Shadow Government. In place. About 4-6 hours later the story was retracted (or is that redacted?) and CNN/whoever reported it laughed and said something like there was confusion about the pentagon's report and it's all just a big mixup so go back to your hot pockets and beer, *plastic chuckles* back to you, Lou.

This is when my mistrust of the US government was solidified. I never trusted them before, but this was tangible confirmation. I mean, even if that "shadow government," were simply in place to govern in the case of emergency-- who are they? We don't know them. What are their credentials? They weren't elected by the public! They're appointed by a goddamn military operations think-tank. That isn't democracy. That's disturbing. But hey, if it's any consolation, I bet the CIA has a shadow government in place too. For our protection. (That grinning again...)

In any case, if you remember that story, or where it was reported, or by who, let me know. I should've known better than to forget the source.

he's IN YER FRIDGE EATIN' UP ALL YERR FOOD!!!!



Aw, I love dieties. Dirty mooches though.

I just found out that if you make a list of people you'd like to kill, you can be charged with criminal conspiracy to commit homicide. I figure since I'm on about 200 government lists already for the crazy shit I view online, why not add a few more?

First, I'd kill M. Night Shyamalan and his entire family. I'm talking wipe out his entire fucking gene pool. That man is a walking egomaniacal black hole of un-talent and I despise him, he should die by my hand in front of his children.

Then, I'd kill Dick Cheney's grandchildren to prove that he was next. I'd waterboard them until they admitted they were an entire family of repressed homosexuals and then drown them. I bet he wouldn't even care. Then I'd blow Cheney's head off with a Quail-hunting shotgun.

I'd lock Condi Rice in a log cabin and set it on fire. If only there were some way to videotape as her muscles and tendons contracted into that horrifying fetal-death pose. Oh well, eating her flesh with hot sauce and a nice, dry red will have to suffice.

I'd put Bill O'Reilly, Dr. Phil, Oprah, Geraldo, the entire staff of Fox News, Anderson Cooper, Spike Lee, George W. Bush, Paris Hilton, Regis Philbin, Kathy Lee, Paula Abdul, Simon Cowell, Hugo Chavez, the CEO of every major corporation, and Donald Rumsfeld in line and shoot them all in the kneecaps. Then maybe gut them or draw-and-quarter them one at a time in random order. Notice the commander-in-chief gets no special treatment.

Then, as a final HUZZAH, I'd tape Alberto Gonzoles' mouth and nose shut and watch him suffocate. And just before he does, rip the tape off. Only now he's in a tank of water. Then perform CPR and hell, just hand him over to the radical muslims with an HD video camera.

And I'm crazy enough to do it to, right government? I mean, if some high school girls are crazy enough to target the ENERGIZER BUNNY, who is, by the way, A FICTIONAL FUCKING CHARACTER, then surely ANY citizen is capable of planning out murders and acting on them? Wait- planning to act on them? Is this the dept. of Pre-Crime?! What are you all fucking STUPID?

I tried to download SCMRPG [Don't click that unless you want another watchlist ticked to your IP] yesterday to see what all the Slamdance fuss was about, unfortunately it's Windows only. I'm surprised Jack Thompson isn't all over this one. Speaking of which, that man... earns just about the same ire I have for Shyamalan.

It's like that Michael Moore bit where after Columbine we start to fear our own kids. So they made a list!!! Do you know how many fucking death lists I made in elementary school? So many. And how many people have I killed? Exactly. None. Maybe if you cracked down on GUNS AND AMMO you wouldn't need IDIOTIC ideas like BULLETPROOF TEXTBOOKS or TEACHERS CARRYING CONCEALED WEAPONS.

What a crazy, fucked up world. I think America is in the pot. Out of chips with no more buy-in. We are, as a nation, completely fucked. And it only took one fuck-up, conservative, sent-by-JESUS-CHRIST-LORDNSAVIOR, UNEDUCATED asshole six short years to do it.

Praise god? You fucking imbeciles. The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the people he was any different than god. You've chosen to worship and PRACTICE the very evil you have tried, in utter and complete futility, to condemn from the earth.

Personally, I've had enough. I'm tired of it. Is doomsday approaching? Who gives a fuck? It'd be more of a surprise to have everything turn out all right at this point, so I'm buying the bubbly come 2012 and if we don't make it, then we won't have to explain the death of the free world to a more intelligent - or less intelligent - E.T. race. Dunno which would be more difficult. Most likely the former.

Peace.