In the spirit of this "holiday", I was going to be an asshole and slam on the logic of this grand ole Sunday celebration, but I decide to let a much wiser man than me lay it out for you.  Ladies and gentlemen, George Carlin!


"Here is my problem with the ten commandments: Why exactly are there ten?  You simply do not need ten. The list of ten commandments was artificially and deliberately inflated to get it up to ten. Here's what happened:

About 5,000 years ago, a bunch of religious and political hustlers got together to try to figure out how to control people and keep them in line. They knew people were basically stupid and would believe anything they were told, so they announced that God had given them some commandments.  Up on a mountain.  When no one was around.

Well, let me ask you this: when they were making this shit up, why did they pick ten? Why not nine or eleven? I'll tell you why: because ten sound official. Ten sounds important! Ten is the basis for the decimal system, it's a decade, it's a psychologically satisfying number: the top ten, the ten most wanted, the ten best dressed. So having ten commandments was really a marketing decision! It is clearly a bullshit list. It's a political document artificially inflated to sell better. I will now show you how you can reduce the number of commandments and come up with a list that's a little more workable and logical. I am going to use the Roman Catholic version because those were the ones I was taught as a little boy.

Let's start with the first three:

I AM THE LORD THY GOD THOU SHALT NOT HAVE STRANGE GODS BEFORE ME

THOU SHALT NOT TAKE THE NAME OF THE LORD THY GOD IN VAIN

THOU SHALT KEEP HOLY THE SABBATH

Right off the bat the first three are pure bullshit. Sabbath day? Lord's name? strange gods? Spooky language! Designed to scare and control primitive people. In no way does superstitious nonsense like this apply to the lives of intelligent civilized humans in the 21st century. So now we're down to seven. Next:

HONOR THY FATHER AND MOTHER

Obedience, respect for authority. Just another name for controlling people. The truth is that obedience and respect shouldn't be automatic. They should be earned and based on the parent's performance. Some parents deserve respect, but most of them don't, period. You're down to six.

Now in the interest of logic, something religion is very uncomfortable with, we're going to jump around the list a little bit.

THOU SHALT NOT STEAL

THOU SHALT NOT BEAR FALSE WITNESS

Stealing and lying. Well actually, these two both prohibit the same kind of behavior: dishonesty. So you don't really need two you combine them and call the commandment "thou shalt not be dishonest". And suddenly you're down to five.

And as long as we're combining I have two others that belong together:

THOU SHALT NOT COMMIT ADULTERY

THOU SHALT NOT COVET THY NEIGHBOR'S WIFE

Once again, these two prohibit the same type of behavior. In this case it is marital infidelity. The difference is coveting takes place in the mind. But I don't think you should outlaw fantasizing about someone else's wife because what is a guy gonna think about when he's waxing his carrot? But, marital infidelity is a good idea so we're gonna keep this one and call it "thou shalt not be unfaithful". And suddenly we're down to four.

But when you think about it, honesty and infidelity are really part of the same overall value so, in truth, you could combine the two honesty commandments with the two fidelity commandments and give them simpler language, positive language instead of negative language and call the whole thing "thou shalt always be honest and faithful" and we're down to three.

THOU SHALT NOT COVET THY NEIGHBOR'S GOODS

This one is just plain fucking stupid. Coveting your neighbor's goods is what keeps the economy going! Your neighbor gets a vibrator that plays "O Come O Ye Faithful", and you want one too! Coveting creates jobs so leave it alone. You throw out coveting and you're down to two now: the big honesty and fidelity commandment and the one we haven't talked about yet:

THOU SHALT NOT KILL

Murder. But when you think about it, religion has never really had a big problem with murder. More people have been killed in the name of god than for any other reason. All you have to do is look at Northern Ireland, Kashmir, the Inquisition, the Crusades, and the World Trade Center to see how seriously the religious folks take "thou shalt not kill". The more devout they are, the more they see murder as being negotiable. It depends on who's doing the killing and who's getting killed. So, with all of this in mind, I give you my revised list of the two commandments:

Thou shalt always be honest and faithful to the provider of thy nookie.

&

Thou shalt try really hard not to kill anyone, unless of course they pray to a different invisible man than you.

Two is all you need.  Moses could have carried them down the hill in his fucking pocket.  I wouldn't mind those folks in Alabama posting them on the courthouse wall, as long as they provided one additional commandment:

Thou shalt keep thy religion to thyself."


R.I.P. Georgie Boy

Have a nice "holiday" people.

For all you little American idiots:

"The Decline"

Where are all the stupid people from?
And how'd they get to be so dumb?
Bred on purple mountain range,
Feed amber waves of grain,
Zero feelings.

Blame it on human nature,
Man's destiny.
Blame it on the greediocracy.
The fear of God.
The fear of change.
The fear of truth.

Add the Bill of Rights, subtract the wrongs.
There's no answer.
Memorize and sing star-spangled songs.
When the questions
Aren't ever asked,
Is anybody learning from the past?
We're living in united stagnation.

Father, what have I done?
I took that .22,
A gift to me from you,
To bed with me each night.
Kept it clean, polished and well.
Cherished every cartridge, every shell.

Down by the creek,
Under brush, under dirt,
There's a carcass of my second kill.
Down by the park,
Under stone, under pine,
There's a carcass of my brother William.
Brother where have you gone to
I swear, I never thought I could.
I see so many times
You told me to shoot straight;
Don't pull the trigger, squeeze.
That will ensure a kill.
A kill what we want.
A kill is why we breathe.

The Christians love their guns,
The church and NRA.
Pray for their salvations,
Prey on their lower faiths.
The storybook's been read
And every line believed.
Curriculum's been set,
Logic is threat,
Reason searched and seized

Jerry spent some time in Michigan;
A twenty year vacation, after all he had a dime.
A dime is worth a lot more in Detroit;
A dime in California: a twenty dollar fine.
Jerry only stayed a couple months;
It's hard to enjoy yourself while bleeding out the ass.
Asphyxiation is simple and fast;
It beats seventeen fun years of being someone's bitch

Don't think. (Stay)
Drink your wine. (Home)
Watch the fire burn. (Be)
His problems not mine. (Safe)
Just be that model citizen!

I wish I had a schilling
For every senseless killing;
I'd buy a government.
America's for sale,
And you can get a good deal on it,
And make a healthy profit.
Or maybe tear it apart,
Start with assumption
That a million people are smart,
Smarter than one.

Serotonin's gone.
She gave up, drifted away.
Sara fled, thought process gone.
She left her answering machine on.
The greeting left spoken sincere,
Messages no one will ever hear.
Ten thousand messages a day,
A million more transmissions lay.
Victims of the laissez faire.
Ten thousand voices, a hundred guns,
A hundred decibels turns to one.
One bullet, one empty head.
Now with Serotonin gone...

The man who used to speak
Performs a cute routine.
Feel a little patronized.
Don't feel bad,
They found a way inside your head,
And you feel a bit misled.
It's not that they don't care.

The television's put a thought inside your head
Like a Barry Manilow jingle
I'd like to teach the world to sing
In perfect harmony.
A symphonic blank stare.
It doesn't make you care.
Not designed to make you care.
They're betting you won't care.

Place a wager on your greed,
A wager on your pride.
Why try to beat them when a million others tried?

We are the whore;
Intellectually spayed.
We are the queer;
Dysfunctionally raised.

One more pill to kill the pain.
One more pill to kill the pain.
One more pill to kill the pain.
Living through conformity.

One more prayer to keep me safe.
One more prayer to keep us warm.
One more prayer to keep us safe.
There's gonna be a better place.

Lost the battle, lost the war,
Lost the things worth living for,
Lost the will to win the fight,
One more pill to kill the pain.

The going get tough, the tough get debt.
Don't pay attention, pay the rent.
Next of kins pay for your sins.
A little faith should keep us safe.

Save us!
The human existence is failing,
Resistance essential,
The future written off,
The odds are astronomically against us.
Only a moron and genius
Would fight a losing battle
Against the super ego,
When giving in is so damn comforting.

And so we go on with our lives,
We know the truth, but prefer lies.
Lies are simple, simple is bliss.
Why go against tradition when we can
Admit defeat, live in decline?
Be the victim of our own design.
The status quo built on suspect.
Why would anyone stick out their neck?
Fellow members,
"Club 'We've Got Ours'":
I'd like to introduce you to our host.
He's got his, and I've got mine,
Meet the decline.

We are the queer!
We are the whore!
Ammunition
In the class war!
We are worker!
We love our queen!
We sacrifice!
We're soilent green!
We are the queer!
We are the whore!
Ammunition!
In the class war!

Hello sir,

I am a film student living in North Hollywood chasing a dream like many out here do. I've just seen your new movie "The Happening". Before I go into my thoughts about the movie, let me preface with a little history about our relationship as director and audience member, in case you didn't know.

I, like most, first experienced your work in 1999 with your smash horror, "The Sixth Sense". At my age then, it was probably one of the scarier movies I'd seen (let me tell you, that scene with the thermostat needle falling and Haley Osmont taking a midnight piss still haunts me to this very day). Enough people seemed to like your twist ending so much that it became the new Hollywood fad and we all waited for the next opportunity for you to twist and turn us. The next year, you gave us "Unbreakable"; in my opinion, the pinnacle movie of your career henceforth. A somber modern day myth with a twist that worked a lot better than your first (I still get goosebumps thinking about that last scene). Not many people can bring two big personalities like Bruce Willis and Samuel Jackson onto the screen in a slow, moody piece and make it work without blowing something up and tossing around F-bombs but you did it, and I was surprised at how much depth and intelligence you were able to bring out in the characters and story. And if that wasn't enough, you managed to satisfy my lust for the supernatural with "Signs", a family drama set against the alien invasion. Suspenseful, funny; It brought me back to the nights stoned on my couch watching reruns of Twilight Zone and The X Files. And personally, I dug the cheesy deus ex machina. I was glad to have a director I could go to for some modern day myth. Essentially you hooked me. Good job.

2004 was a crazy year. I had graduated high school, and was preparing to continue my alienation in another public learning institute. The word on the street was the the new Shyamalan joint, "The Village" was out and that it was a drag. But who can trust people, right? I saw it and I couldn't believe it. I hated it. And I hated that I hated it. I suppose it might have been the marketing campaign that destroyed the ending for me as I knew what would happen about 15 minutes in and sat in boredom and awe as a movie crumbled before my eyes. Or the fact that the story itself was not completely original having viewed a similar telling of the story in my youth. Either way, I was swept up in the backlash of it and rode it for about a year and a half, all the way up to "Lady in the Water". By this time I was reading critic reviews before spending money on flicks and early reports were not good. However, a friend paid for my ticket and I watched just to see what you could do. And you got me. It wasn't necessarily great in the ways that "Unbreakable" and "Signs" were to me, but it was cute and intimate and surreal and I enjoyed it. A modern day fairy tale. It was enough to knock me off the hater boat and land in neutral territory. You had my respect, but not my affection.

So, I think that brings us to now. With all due respect, the advertising campaign had managed to kill my excitement for "The Happening". I found myself annoyed when I would visit joblo.com for my daily movie news only to be bothered by a full page ad that would appear suddenly, but strangely, whenever I clicked leading me to another ad and wasting 15 seconds of my time. Anyway, I woke up today hungry for some friday cinema. I was going to be classy and see "Mongol" at the Arclight in Hollywood, but I didn't want to deal with freeway traffic going south at lunch hour. So I went to Rotten Tomatoes to see what was good. The Hulk seemed to have the buzz but I found myself bored with this whole super hero trend that has taken american cinema by storm (and I'm only interested in seeing "The Dark Knight"; all other super hero movies seem like they would be a disappointment just because they aren't TDK). So, "The Happening" was it. The reviews were terrible, but "LITW" had taught me that critics today are full of *beep* and the negative buzz actually got me a little excited.

Hmmm, "The Happening"...I dug it. It wasn't a bad movie by any means. I get what you were trying to do with it. A lot of things worked a few things didn't. As a man who thinks that cancer is God's tool for population control (dangerous growth of a species = dangerous growth in a species), the idea that plant life and other natural forces unbeknownst to us could strike after all we've done to destroy the Earth, is interesting, if not a bit ridiculous. But Wahlberg said it in the beginning: "There are forces at work beyond our understanding." So I played the game. It was interesting, grim and at times humorous. My first thoughts through the beginning were that Mark Wahlberg, while a very exceptional actor, does not come off at all like a high school teacher. Maybe a firefighter, but if he wasn't acting like such a dork, it wouldn't have worked. Zooey was great and cute like she always is but suffers from feeling out of place next to the real person that is out of place. Not surprisingly, their best acted scene is one in which they are speaking emotionally to each other in separate rooms using pipes that transport sound vibrations, but it is a moving scene nonetheless. John Leguizamo over acted as usual, even when trying to be subtle, but I didn't expect much from him. His daughter in the movie must've caught that trait from her father because she was pretty bland too. So now that mediocre acting has been established, we can move on to impressive camera work and interesting use of shots. There was a great sense of "every man for himself" in the choice of close ups in certain scenes. A feeling of dissonance from people that really works for the mood of the movie. I especially dug a scene in which the group of people all turn to Wahlberg for an answer as to what they should do and the camera fills the screen with his face as he tries to scientifically deduce the best course of action for the group in the immediate time frame. It's close, it's wide, it's uncomfortable and it kicks ass. The problem that most may have with the film is that right off the bat we know that we have no comprehension of what is happening and slowly come to accept that it will remain that way for it's entirety, but an open ending is just life. All in all, the film felt like another modern day myth by M. Night Shyamalan. It wasn't great, but it was a very interesting romp through the improbable, just like most of your movies.

Now, there seems to be a movement going on to destroy you and your credibility, simply because of the past, momentary disappointment and the fact that everyone needs something to destroy so that they don't destroy themselves. Having said that, people will always throw around words like "overrated", "underrated", and "world's worst", without even letting time pass to justify such judgement. Someone could argue that Kubrick was overrated (they'd be wrong :D), but the man is dead and gone. Only his work remains as a testament to his passion for us to view and consider. One could also argue Spielberg as overrated, but the man has been in the game for well over 40 years of his life and has made many, many films. You on the otherhand, are still waiting to break big. You've proven your place in the scene with your earlier work, now you just have to keep on keeping on. You've still got a lot of life ahead of you to get things right and gives us a great picture again, and by us, I mean every fan of film because we'll all recognize when you pull it off again. People may be stupid as whole, but there is hope. Your first few features were very exceptional and showed a lot of talent. The subsequent ones had charm, but people came to expect a lot from you, too much for a young director, and disappointment killing anticipation is a terrible feeling, but it is a feeling a lot of people have to get over, especially in America with our our media that jumps on people like their day to day life were history in the making, branding people with names and reputations like it was elementary school. But it's not, and we both know that. This is a phase. They happen all the time in life and we don't know why. They threw out "next Hitchcock" as easily as they're throwing out "hack director" but these are just words and words are only as powerful as the power you give them. Maybe people need to lighten up and let artists experiment with their work. The work may suffer for a time because of it, but every failure is a learning experience, and I think you're learning. Film is something that evolves through time, on large and small scales, like most art, and the capitalism that drives the industry now is not very friendly to this pattern. But there is hope, if you believe in that kind of thing. I've seen your movies. I think you do.

So in summation, it's been money well spent for the most part, and I look forward to what's next.

Signed,

i suppose you could call me fan

Because I make motherfucking films, not gigabytes.

Certain recent tragic events have forced me take a closer look at myself.
Allow me start off casually:

So, as most of you know, famous self-proclaimed crocodile hunter Steve Irwin died by sting ray the other day.

WAIT A SECOND.

A fucking sting ray?
Wow, you know, in the back of your mind, you always thought it'd be a crocodile...weird.

But anyways, yeah, I heard about this on the night of its occurance and was saddened somewhat.
But then I thought, "Well, that's what the dude gets for fucking with animals his entire life."
And then I thought about all the recent deaths that have occured that have either hit close to home or miles away from home and in doing so have determined that I am not a very sympathetic person in these situations.

In fact, in seems in these situations that my morality and desire to empathize vanish completely and now, I sit contemplating myself.

Haha contemplating myself...I like that.

I feel so...desensitized(?) to all this death and violence.  Enough so to make light of these situations (sometimes extremely).  But then I think to myself that there are millions of kids my age probably doing or thinking the same thing.

So what am I?
What are we?

What we are:
A generation that grew up in the wake of vietnam.
Raised on late night TV and Saturday morning cartoons.
We grew up AFTER A Clockwork Orange and Apocalypse Now.
We weren't desensitized to sex and violence persay.
It's in our blood passed down to us by hippies and activists.
The result of a cultural renaissance.
Sex, drugs, and rock and roll baby.

What am I?
My father's son.

Enough said.

So, I was going through random bulletins today because I am bored and waiting for my laundry to finish, and I came across some chain shit where you say whether you like emo or metal better.  Now everything was going great in this chain until people started bagging on the each other's genre and saying stupid shit about eating dicks and crying like girls.  Now, most people say I have like emo tendencies and if you look at me from the top  of a tall building, you could probably think that too.  But I really appreciate both musical genres for their strengths.  And that's what this generation of music lovers need to do.  So here's a little wake up call:

EMO KIDS ARE A BUNCH OF SPOILED WHINY BUTT FUCKING QUEERS WHO CAN'T SHAKE THEIR HAIR OUT OF THEIR EYES LONG ENOUGH TO SEE THAT THE WORLD DOESN'T END WHEN WHEN THEIR GIRLFRIEND BREAKS UP WITH THEM

METAL HEADS ARE A BUNCH OF FUCKING DICK HEADED DOUCHE BAGS WHO THINK REPETITIVE SHITTY DRUM BEATS, GROWLING AND GUITAR SOLOS ARE ALL MUSIC HAS TO OFFER SO TO COMPENSATE FOR THEIR MUSICAL HANDICAP THEY'LL BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF PEOPLE SMALLER THAN THEM AT SHOWS

COUNTRY FOLKS ARE A BUNCH OF STUPID JOCK INBRED WHITEYS WHO WANT TO FUCK THEIR SISTERS BUT CAN'T SO THEY DECIDED TO BEAT THEIR WIVES AND MAKE SHITTY SONGS ABOUT THE WHOLE ORDEAL

GRUNDGE KIDS STILL JUST CAN'T ACCEPT THE FACT THAT THEIR IDOL BASICALLY SOLD OUT, DID MASSIVE AMOUNTS OF DRUGS AND SHOT HIMSELF IN THE FUCKING HEAD

RAP GANGSTERS ARE A BUNCH OF STUPID FUCKING NIGGERS WHO CAN'T DEAL WITH THE FACT THAT THEY HAVE NO REASON TO BE PISSED OFF ANYMORE SO THEY'LL JUST MAKE THE SAME SHITTY SONG ABOUT THEIR NON-OPPRESSION OR SOME OTHER LAME SHIT ABOUT DANCING IN THE CLUB OR GETTING RICH

RAVERS AND CLUBBERS NEED TO LAY OFF THE FUCKING DRUGS AND START MAKING MUSIC THAT ISN'T THE SAME GODDAMN BEAT WITH THE SAME GODDAMN MELODY OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN

HARDCORE PUNKS ARE A BUNCH OF TALENTLESS FACIST ASSHOLE DRUNKS WHO CAN'T PLAY THEIR INSTRUMENTS OR COME UP WITH ANYTHING CATCHY SO THEY JUST MAKE A BUNCH OF NOISE AND HOPE THEIR FANS ARE TOO DRUNK TO TELL THE DIFFERENCE

Okay, with that said, what is solved?

NOTHING

Calling each other a bunch of fucking queers and cock mongers doesn't get us anywhere.  So why do we do it?  Why must everyone feel the need to separate from each other and put up boundrys within their respective scenes?  Musically and artistically, we as a generation have the potential to push ourselves into the next cultural renaissance.  I mean for godsakes, we're smarter than we have any right to be, we know more about the world and life than our parents ever knew at our age, we have all the infinite fucking resources to use, and we have a blueprint of what NOT to do.  A major social change WILL happen in our life time.  But if we can't show that all important amount of respect for each other and our interests, than all we're doing is becoming more disconnected as people.

The internet has made it possible for everyone to voice their opinion.  If your opinion is any of the rants listed above, then it depresses me that despite the knowledge that I know everyone of you has, we really are just a bunch of fucking ignorant kids

STOP BEING AN ASSHOLE/BITCH

SHOW SOME GODDAMN RESPECT

GROW THE FUCK UP

and most importantly, enjoy it.  Because pretty soon, it's all gunna be over

that is all.

There comes a time in a person's life where he or she realizes who they are and what they need to do.

This past month or so has been probably the worst and darkest month of my life. An incident occured a a while ago where my brother was doing something very stupid to my uncle and I, like the good brother that I am, had his back. He's my little brother; I would have protected him until the end of time. But my brother is a bad person. He is an arrogant, pompous, ignorant, manipulative jerk. And in all this he is one of the most charming and funniest people I know. Hey, even Satan talked Eve into eating the apple right? My uncle Tony may be one of the greatest and wisest people God or whoever created us may have put on this Earth. For years I considered him a sort of mentor to me. In protecting my brother, I lost this person's involvement in my life. I see the mistake that was made. My brother is someone who has been with me my entire life. We are the children of divorce in our family and we grew closer than I thought two people could grow close because we were always together. But I have to part ways with him. He is a bad person that is only holding me back from what I have come to realize I need to do. In this past month I have also lost one of my best friends out of basically my own inexperience and my emotions. I did a bad thing to her (I'm pretty sure everyone knows who she is). It was the first time I ever felt the way I did about someone and I didn't know how to handle it when things went wrong. So to atone to it for myself I had to do a bad thing but I had to be true to myself and do what I needed to do to move on. For that, I am sorry. So basically

Tonight was the last straw with my brother. I cut it off with him for the time being. Some would say this is typical Franco. But in the long drive home, I have had time to think.

Time to think about life.
Time to think about myself.

I have come to realize that I am not only an appreciater of art but an artist as well. Throughout the course of my life, all my exemplary marks have been at things like writing and drawing. I enjoy what art is so much and have ignored it as unrealistic due to my asian family, my own laziness, and perhaps the sub-conscious idea that it could never happen.

But not anymore.

I realize now that I need to cut the ties of all things that are holding me back in the world. The city of Newark for one. I love this city for reasons unaware to me except for the fact that this is where I call home. This will always be where I call home. But you can really get caught in this state of mind that exists in this place. And I don't want that anymore. FOr the past few years or maybe even my entire life, I have been wasting my time with things that are ultimately and simultaneously incredibly meaningless and infinitly meaningful.

Art is the expression of life. How well one is considered an artist is how well one expresses their life. Life is people. Life is ideas. Life is ultimately life. This fascinates me to no end. Writers are all basically expressing life through written word. Jack Kerouac expresses the mind set of the proclaimed "beat" generation of bohemians or "bums" traveling across the nation and enjoying all that America had to offer and at the same time expressing profound ideas of what life is in books like "On The Road". Hunter S. Thompson, through articles and his self-proclaimed "gonzo journalism" made incredibly different but insanely relevent attacks on the post and pre-Nixon administrations of this country from the view of the hippies that inhabited America in the seventies and ultimately defined a generation of people. Bret Easton Ellis expressed the corruption and disconnectivness of eighties Wall Street beautifully through the eyes of a psychotic yuppie killer in "American Psycho" and brought the world that is LA to life in books like "Less Than Zero" and "The Informers". Chuck Pahlaniuk rebels quite nihilistically against the materialism and greed that corrupted the Generation Xer's of the ninties in books like "Fight Club" and "Survivor".

Art.
It is a beautiful thing.
And it is what I want to do with my life.

Art is an expression of life. In order to be an artist, I must do two things:

1. I must immerse myself in art. I will read all the books I've been too lazy to read before. I will listen to all the music I've been too skeptical or "busy" to listen to before. I must admire all the great works of art and imagery that I felt I would be too bored to experience.

2. I must experience all that life has to offer. I have to cut ties in my life that are holding me from wanting to go out there and live life. Some will say how will I make money? I'll get a job. It's a part of life that everyone including me must accept and in order to make art, you must be willing to live life. I have to go out and not be afraid to venture. I stated that I must free myself of ties that hold me back from this goal and one of those ties is fear. So I have to grow balls. There is a lot I must learn in this life and it's about time I started learning this.

I am going to now state something that may hurt some people a lot and may also sound extremely weird, but here it goes. Alex Sanchez is my hetero life partner. I say that with all the seriousness that I have to offer. In the past year or so I have felt a connection with him that I have not felt with anyone ever before. Don't get me wrong, to all my guy friends and all my girl friends that are in my life: I love you all intensely. You truly do make life worth living and everyday with you is a true blessing to me. But I'll say it now, Alex is someone who I have to share my experiences with. He is my hetero other half. In my mind, there are things that are supposed to happen and there are awesome things that can happen. I feel that me and Alex becoming friends is something out of my hands and I think we as friends will have to be together and experience things together that a lot of people won't get to and for that I am sorry.


This trip that we are taking to Fresno is going to be the beginning of that. A trip away from the confine that is Newark.

Some may feel I'm being dramatic. Some may feel I'm being unrealistic. Some may feel I'm being an asshole. Whatever you may feel just know how I feel. I feel that this is me taking control of my life for the first time. I feel that this is me doing what is right for me. I don't really know where I'll be or what I'll be doing for awhile, but I will give you this:

510-329-9905

"Dude Franco. Did you just post you number online?"
"Yes"
"Don't you know how stupid that is?"
"Yes, so please don't tell me."

The Faint - Dance music for people who think they're too cool for dance music

This is a very important entry to me. You see, for the last month or two, me and a select group of people have been addicted to Green Day's CD American Idiot. I don't think anyone really knows how much either, but you will. For you see, the CD is indeed a rock opera and the story it tells is extremely deep and has been pondered over by me and my fellow appreciaters for literally hours on end. It is important for me that others understand the massive scope of this CD and it's relevance in the youth of today. You may be some hardcore person that may slam Green Day for being too mainstream; or bash them for not sticking to their roots; or you just may not like their songs; but I ask you, hear their story. And if you don't want to do that,a surprise is here. I took it upon myself to transcribe the entire story of American Idiot song by song. It's long. Really long. It took me quite a long time to do but it is here now. For everyone that has never understand my fascination with this CD and why I call it the bible for today's youth, read what I have written, if you have time of course. If you don't, come back later and do so. Let's begin!!! American Idiot : I always say I like to think of this song as a prologue to the CD just like I like to think of Whatsername as an epilogue and have the CD start and end with the 9 minute long opus’s. This song is a call to rebellion. It rants against the propaganda and hysteria put forth by the media turning people into what is introduced as the American Idiot: a person who basically follows the order of the media, someone swayed by the “subliminal mindfuck” and who “sings along to the age of paranoia”. They call America “one nation controlled by the media” and in an “information age of hysteria”. So in other words Green Day: Good ; media: BAD! Jesus of Suburbia : The true beginning of the CD in my opinion and the first 9 minute song. It is made up of five parts which in order are: 1. Jesus of Suburbia 2. City of the Damned 3. I Don’t Care 4. Dearly Beloved 5. Tales of Another Broken Home It would be easy just to explain the song in its entirety now, but it may ruin the rest of the story for you so I will explain it among the course of the story. This song is basically the story of the entire CD. The song has not happened yet but rather is a prophecy foretelling the coming of the Jesus of Suburbia who will rise against the aforementioned media and government and bring the underground up. The land of make believe, referenced so much in this song, is the nation that believes the lies told to it by the government and media. Holiday : Before I start explaining, let me say that holiday in foreign countries is interchangeable with “vacation” i.e. Spring Vacation being called Spring Holiday. Now, this song is basically about the state of the nation now and is completely anti-war. It is written from the point of view of someone not for the war or this government (the coming Jesus of Suburbia perhaps?). It describes “the falling rain” that comes “down like an Armageddon flame” which is obviously a reference to the intense bombing of Iraq and such. It mocks religious groups (“can I get another Amen?”) and points the fingers at corporations and money as tools for the war (“the company lost the war today”, “another protestor has crossed the line to find the money's on the other side”). Perhaps most notably, it mocks a certain California representative (cough Arnold cough) in a way that makes him sound almost like Hitler. He calls out to “pulverize the Eiffel Towers that criticize your government” and to “Kill all the fags that don’t agree”. Not very a bright world. So since corporation is obviously for war, it’s time for holiday! Time to “dream and differ from the hollow lies.” Note: At this point or possibly during Holiday, Jesus of Suburbia’s self-titled first act can be placed. The first act tells of the Jesus of Suburbia’s dissatisfaction with home. It talks of being raised “on a steady diet of soda pop and Ritalin” and tells of how “no one ever died for my sins in hell as far as I can tell, at least the ones I got away with”. From the get go, we can see this is one of those commonly titled “hyperactive” kids who create trouble in “paradise” and must be dealt with sedatives for some reason. This comes out further in the reoccurring chorus of this part “There’s nothing wrong with me, this is how I’m supposed to be, in the land of make believe (America), they don’t believe in me”. It also speaks of the influence of drugs as a negative (“to fall in love and fall in debt to alcohol and cigarettes and Mary Jane to keep me insane doing someone else’s cocaine”) which probably has something to do with the drug rehabilitation of Billie Joe prior to the making of this CD. Boulevard of Broken Dreams : This song can have several meanings out of the context of the story of American Idiot, but from here, it is written in the perspective of the coming Jesus of Suburbia. By now he has experienced the first act of Jesus of Suburbia which is basically his life before he walks “this lonely road” that just happens to go through The City of the Damned, the second part of Jesus of Suburbia. City of the Damned is basically the prophecy that is being lived in Boulevard of Broken Dreams. This is the Jesus of Suburbia coming. He’s walking that “lonely road” looking for “someone out there” to find him. He’s looking for the underground. But even more than that, he’s looking for someone; someone who will be talked about in greater detail later. Everything he encounters in the Boulevard is prophesized in the City of the Dead. From the “the center of the Earth in the parking lot of the 7-11 were I was taught the motto was just a lie” to “the graffiti in the bathroom stall like the holy scriptures of a shopping mall”, he is slowly fulfilling his destiny of rebellion. Are We The Waiting? : This song is written from the point of view of the underground from the city. They are the ones who have heard the story of the Jesus of Suburbia and fight against the media and governments in hopes that he will come and save and help them. They are “the waiting unknown” because they are still waiting for Him to bring the underground up. But at this point their hopes are low; at one part even saying “the Jesus of Suburbia is a lie”. Lines like “Forget me nots and second thoughts live in isolation” bring up the fact that they may be not keep thinking he is coming which is reinforced by lines like “heads or tails and fairytales in my mind” which bring up that they are deciding whether to still believe the stories that have been told to them since they were young. The lines “This dirty town was burning down in my dreams” is foreshadowing of what’s to come (because unlike the underground, we already know that “Jesus” is coming) The song has been slammed down numerously for being too repetitive. It is supposed to be this way to reinforce that they have been waiting for a long time “screaming ‘Are we the waiting?’” And just when you think it can’t go on any longer, suddenly… St. Jimmy : The song immediately cuts to this track to reinforce the awe and surprise that occurs when he comes. This song is the song glorifying the coming of the Jesus of Suburbia who calls himself St. Jimmy. It’s so fast and upbeat to emphasize how awesome and inspiring this event is. He might as well have come in on a parade saying lines like “I'm the patron saint of the denial with an angel face and a taste for suicidal” and “My name is Jimmy and you better not wear it out, suicide commando that your momma talked about”. The song is basically the excitement that comes with the fact that he has finally come to save them. Give Me Novocaine : This song is written from the perspective of one of St. Jimmy’s disciples. At this point, the fight against the media and government has been raging for a little and it is hard. The person in this song is weary with physical and mental scars, but if Jimmy can “drain the pressure from the swelling”, “give me a long kiss goodnight” and “tell me Jimmy I won’t feel a thing”, then he will stand by him. At this point in the story, the third part from Jesus of Suburbia titled I Don’t Care can be placed. It is a shout out from the followers of Jimmy and it is the chant that leads them with lines like “everyone’s so full of shit, born and raised by hypocrites” and “we are the kids of war and peace from Anaheim to the Middle East”. She’s A Rebel : At last, we get introduced to a key character in St. Jimmy’s life: Whatsername, Jimmy’s love interest. The song is written from Jimmy’s perspective in an idealistic crush kind of mood. He’s excited about this girl saying “She’s a rebel, she’s a saint” and asking “Is she dreaming what I’m thinking?” The power she has on him is expressed in “She’s holding on my heart like a hand grenade”. She is the girl Jimmy has been waiting for since being on “the Boulevard” (“sometimes I wish someone out there will find me”); someone who will inspire Jimmy to fight on (“she’s the symbol of resistance” and “she sings the revolution, the dawning of our lives”). To everyone “from Chicago to Toronto she’s the one that they call Whatsername” but to Jimmy, she’s so much more. Extraordinary Girl : Another song about Whatsername this time a little more intimate and a lot more serious. There is a lot of drama going on apparently since St. Jimmy and Whatsername have “gotten together”. The chorus “She’s an extraordinary girl in an ordinary world, and she can’t seem to get away” brings up the thought that maybe she is unhappy being where she is and thinks she should be somewhere better. Jimmy’s insecurities about being the guy to save her comes out with the lines “He lacks the courage in his mind, like a child left behind, like a pet left in the rain.” It seems like the only reason Whatsername even stays in this town is because of Jimmy (“She sees the mirror of herself; an image she wants to sell to anyone willing to buy. He steals the image in her kiss from her hearts apocalypse”). I think what is really going on here is that Whatsername is starting to lose faith in the resistance and thinking more of the future than living in the present. Letterbomb : Definitely not a good song for Jimmy. It starts out with an almost mocking child voice serenading the lyrics “Nobody likes you, everyone left you, they’re all off without you having fun.” The majority of this song is a letter from “W” (Whatsername) to “J” (Jimmy). Whatsername slams down Jimmy’s fight against the powers that be with questions like “Where will all the martyrs go when the virus cures itself and where will we all go when it’s too late?” She mocks Jimmy saying “The town bishop’s an extortionist, and he don’t even know that you exist. Standing still when it’s do or die, you better run for your fucking life.” I think she sees that this is a fight they can never win and that she doesn’t want to deal with it any more (“It’s cities burning, it’s not my burden” Side note: The cities burning is also a reference of prophecy fulfilled from Are We The Waiting.). Lines like “What's in love is now in debt” emphasize the struggle of the resistance while lines like “The dummy failed the crash test collecting unemployment checks like a flunkie along for the ride” show what may be becoming of his followers. I believe that Jimmy’s followers have evolved into the disillusioned youth of today with they’re “I don’t fucking give a shit” attitude and who are just along because it’s the rebellious thing to do. The last lines are Jimmy saying “She said I can’t take this town I’m leaving it behind. She said I can’t take this place I’m leaving you tonight.” Jimmy is all alone. His inspiration is gone. It truly is sad times. Perfect for the next song. Wake Me When September Ends : Obviously a lamentation song. I believe this is supposed to be a song for Whatsername from Jimmy. I believe quite some time has passed (“seven years has gone so fast”) and he laments “summer has come and passed, the innocent can never last” showing that maybe he’s seen that he is indeed fighting a losing battle and “here comes the rain again falling from the stars; drenched in my pain again, becoming who we are” indicating that his disciples and himself are suffering at this point in the fight. The lines “as my memory rests but never forgets what I lost” remind us of Whatsername and show that Jimmy still remembers her. The final lines of the song show that now “twenty years has gone so fast” saying that this whole period of lamentation and struggle has spanned quite a long time even since the beginning of the song…and Jimmy still remembers what he has lost. Homecoming : The end of the story in many ways, but not of the CD. The last 9 minute long song is basically the downfall of the resistance and the affirmation of the American Idiot in us all. It is broken down into five parts which I can explain now. Note first that sometimes the mood that the instruments create say a lot about the story when taken into account. The first part of the song, The Death of St. Jimmy starts out rather depressing with a subtle guitar in the background and lines like “My heart is beating from me, I stand all alone” and “waste another years flies by”. The song then starts getting heavy with lines like “In the streets of shame where you’ve lost you dreams in the rain” and “There's no signs of hope; the stems and seeds of the last of the dope” creating a dark image of what has become of the resistance. Also “There's a glow of light, the St. Jimmy is the spark in the night. Bearing gifts and trust: the fixture in the city of lust” indicates that Jimmy is still doing his duty that he has been doing for ages but he’s still all alone in the world. He begs several questions to the hopeless before him: “What’s you pleasure and what’s your pain? Do you dream too much? Do you think what you need is a crutch?” The idea of unity has become disillusioned in the struggle with Jimmy’s motto becoming “We’re fucked up but we’re not the same and mom and dad are the ones you can blame”. At the end of this part: “Jimmy died today. He blew his brains out into the bay. In the state of mind it’s my own private suicide” The actual Jimmy doesn’t die but rather the part of him that still fights against the media and government. He can’t keep fighting anymore. At this point we must remember the fourth part from Jesus of Suburbia titled Dearly Beloved. This is the metaphorical eulogy being given at Jimmy’s metaphorical funeral by Jimmy (Yes, I know that sounds weird). It shows the downheartedness and disillusionment of the rebellion with lines like “Dearly beloved are you listening? I can’t remember a word that you were saying” and “Oh therapy can you please fill the void, am I retarded or am I just overjoyed?” It also shows Jimmy’s ever-existing insecurities with himself with “Nobody’s perfect and I stand accused, for lack of a better word and that’s my best excuse” showing how he feels he needs to live up to what is expected of him seeing how he is the Jesus of Suburbia and all. The next part of the song “East 12th Street” opens with the question “Does anyone care if nobody cares?” bashing the “I don’t give a shit” attitude that comes along with most rebellious youth these days and showing why he’s settling down. The melodic singing starts coming in telling about “Jesus filling out paperwork now at the facility on East 12th St.” where Jimmy works his 9-5 job with everyone else and where “He'd rather be doing something else now like cigarettes and coffee with the underbelly” showing that he misses the old life of resistance. The lines “she had enough and he had plenty” remind us of Whatsername and the fight that caused her to leave. Jimmy’s dissatisfaction with his life at this point shows with lines like the repetitious “Somebody get me out of here” and “This life like dream ain’t for me”. The next part of the song, Nobody Likes You, drifts threw chanting verses and little instrumentation with the exception of a light acoustic guitar and bells ringing in the background. It shows Jimmy’s home life now with lines like “I fell asleep while watching Spike TV after ten cups of coffee and you’re still not here” showing his life in front of the TV again and him still missing Whatsername. The longing continues with lines like “I can’t tell anyone cause no one’s here” and “Left me here alone, and I should’ve stayed home”. He misses Whatsername, he misses the resistance, and he misses his life. He feels completely alone now and the lines that opened Letterbomb repeat themselves here to reinforce his loneliness. The next song, Rock and Roll Girlfriend, is a letter from one of his former disciples telling Jimmy of all he has accomplished. It is a shallow song telling about how he has “a rock and roll life” and “a rock and roll girlfriend and another ex-wife”. The guy is lacking morally in lines like “I got a kid in New York, I got a kid in the bay” and he’s obviously dealing with drugs in lines like “I haven’t drank or smoked nothing in over 22 days so get off of my case”. The song itself is laid in a three chord punk style guitar style to emphasize the shallowness of what it is about. If this is the future of the resistance, there is no future. The song finally ends with the final act called We’re Coming Home Again. This is the final depressing chapter showing the return of Jimmy’s formal disciples and ultimately himself to the home they all left in the beginning of the story. The lines “here they come marching down the street like a desperation murmur of a heart beat” and “the time has come and it’s going nowhere, nobody ever said that life was fair” show the reluctance of some to come back home and the hopelessness they left from their resistance. “The world is spinning around and around out of control of again from the 7-11 to the fear of breaking down” show the media’s influence once again on putting the nation into a state of mind where “everything isn’t meant to be okay”(American Idiot). They are marching back not just to their physical homes, but they are also going back in their mindset. They are becoming everything they have tried to escape and fight against. They are becoming the blissfully (or lack thereof) ignorant American Idiot. For a long time I wondered why this CD wasn’t called the Jesus of Suburbia until I got that at the end, even He becomes an American Idiot. It seems that it is the Jesus of Suburbia’s destiny to fail his mission. And as he marches with his former disciples back home chanting “Home, we’re coming home again”, he rings out in the final moments singing what has been etched into his mind: “Nobody likes you, everyone left you, they’re all out without you having fun.” Note: At this point Jesus of Suburbia’s final act titled Tales of Another Broken Home can be placed. The lines give more hope to rebels and such with lines like “To live and not to breathe is to die in tragedy” and “To run, to run away to find what you believe” which kind of justify leaving what you know in the first place. The Jesus of Suburbia speaks plainly at the end “I don't feel any shame I won't apologize when there ain't nowhere you can go; running away from pain when you've been victimized: tales from another broken home” saying with knowledge of what has happened that he regrets nothing he has done and that anyone can accomplish what he has done and follow his path again. The song Jesus of Suburbia ends itself begging the question “are you leaving home?” which is directed at the future rebels of America who may pick up where Jimmy has left off and fight the good fight some day. Whatsername : I consider this the epilogue to the story. It tells of a chance encounter between Jimmy and Whatsername after Jimmy has become the American Idiot. It sheds some light on what went on with Jimmy after Whatsername left with lines like “I made a point to burn all of the photographs, she went away and then I took a different path”. It also shows how Jimmy has become so much of an American Idiot with “I remember the face but I can’t recall the name and now I wonder how Whatsername has been” showing that he is one of the mass of people that only remember this extraordinary girl as Whatsername. But alas, a glimmer of light shows in Jimmy with lines like “The regrets are useless in my mind she's in my head I must confess. The regrets are useless in my mind she's in my head from so long ago” and “I'll never turn back time, forgetting you but not the time” showing that even though he has made himself forget her, the memory of her still lives inside of him. It’s kind of a glimmer of hope in a sad ending and says something about love.