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WannaBeatle



Last Updated: 12/12/2009

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Gender: Male
Status: Single
Age: 34
Sign: Leo

City: West Covina
State: California
Country: US
Signup Date: 8/25/2004

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Monday, November 17, 2008 
well, I've been looking to get a so-called "real job" and thinking of just using these answers. This was, of course a joke that an out of work (at the time) writer dreamed of, but still hilarious.

This is an actual job application that a 75 year old senior citizen submitted to Wal-Mart in Arkansas.


They should've  hired him because he's so funny...


NAME: Kenneth Way (Grumpy Bastard)

SEX: Not lately, but I am looking for the right woman (or at least one who will cooperate)

DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President.  But seriously, whatever's available.  If I was in a position to be picky, would I be applying here in the first place?

DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package.  If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

EDUCATION: Yes.

LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

PREVIOUS SALARY: A lot less than I'm worth.

MOS T NO TABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.

REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.

HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.

PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 P.M. Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.

MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?

DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 lbs.?: Of what?

DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do you have a car that runs?"

HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing House Sweepstakes, so they tell me.

DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job - no!  
                                  On my breaks - yes!

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread.   Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.

NEAREST RELATIVE ...7 miles

DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?:   Oh yes, absolutely.

10:18 AM 
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Thursday, November 15, 2007 
ok, lads and lasses...
Last week Kirk and I headed out to the open call for extras in Star Trek XI and we were semi interviewed by a very cute female reporter. But, anyhoo, we were both mentioned in the article about the open call...check it out here...

LA Times Article
1:04 PM 
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Tuesday, July 24, 2007 

Current mood:  depressed
well kids, just to let ya know that I'm back in town now about a week and a half earlier than expected. I had a lot of fun up there for a while, met a lot of great people, proposed marriage (and she accepted). But, some things happened and...oh well. c'est la vie.
6:57 PM 
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Monday, May 07, 2007 

Current mood:  calm

I'm pretty damned sure that none of you care at all, but I'll be out of town from July 15th to 25th. I'll be visiting someone a wee up north in Montreal. I'll try to come back with pictures that I can post on here.

 

edit--my trip has been extended a wee more now. I am now coming back on August 1st.

4:28 AM 
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Saturday, April 07, 2007 

Current mood:  excited

Ok, I got myself another new toy not too long ago from a friend from the band, Super Ego (thanks, Chewie!). It's probably one of the best basses I've heard other than my first '82 Hofner 500/1. I think it's great bass, I have a set of Rotosound flatwound strings (gracias Michelle) on it now. All it just needs some very minor adjustments; a decent set-up and it'll be super great bass.

 

3:01 AM 
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Friday, December 29, 2006 
I finally bought meself a new car earlier today. My first new...not used car is one of those Toyota Yaris' that the kids are talkin' so much about these days...and it's a cool gray colour, too.
5:55 AM 
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Friday, December 15, 2006 

I'm sure most of ya know that I haven't been online as much as I used to be...no no no, I did not find myself a life all the sudden. My computer just took a dive a couple of months back. I should be gettin' myself a new one pretty soon by New Year's or so...

 

see ya next time!!!

12:59 AM 
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Monday, March 27, 2006 
Even though we didn't win, I probably one of the best times I've had playing in a looooooooong time. I think the three of us (Rick, Ryan and myself) did a pretty damned great job...especially since we were down one guy. That new Hofner is really proving itself to me now...it certainly helps with the aid of that Ampeg amp I've been playing through.
9:31 AM 
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Monday, March 20, 2006 
well, it's been about a couple of weeks since I got my new Hofner Beatle bass prototype. I think I'm in love..oh oh oh. Great sounding, they are (hmm, that sounded a wee like Yoda). There were only 9 made of these basses and I got lucky enough to snag one before they all went into some grubby hands of some collector that has too many toys.
2:38 AM 
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Thursday, December 08, 2005 

Well, The Give continued to record for our demo last night...everything is going pretty well. I haven't had so much fun in years since I've been playing with these lads. We only finished one song last night, a song that I dubbed the updated version of Paperback Writer, Internet Blogger :)) (it kinda has the same type riff). I even put a very Beatle-esque bass line ala Rain and Paperback Writer on it.

Now if only The Apple Scruffs can get a show in before the end of the holidays, I'd be happy. 

6:53 AM 
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