its rougly 11:09, depending on when i get this done. so i'm starting this at 11:09, its like one of those lame bulletins thats like "time started" and "time ended."

i'll probably do that.

so its tuesday night, its raining and lightening. i love when it rains at night. its not like i'd be doing anything at night that is hindered by the whether, so i say LET IT RAIN!
i turned in an application today at kawasaki. i hope i get the job. honestly i don't. but i do so people get off my back about it, because in truth i hate working, i hate being on someone elses clock, i hate having to meet someone's standards.

i like skateboarding. i wish i could make it doing that, i wish i got paid to film. or to make clothes. i wish i had more of a drive to make clothes. i have clothes to make and they're not made. they're just uncut fabric in a bag. as if they're waiting for a muse. i'm that muse. i will help it become something more than it is. but i'm too lazy to do anything about it.

i wish i had someone like the person that i just described for my life (but not lazy). i wish that the world wasn't so hard to get by in. i wish i wish i wish i wish. thats all i ever have. wishes. i rarely do anything to actualize them.

i need to leave i need to grow i need to blah blah blah.

i need to make things happen.
period.

now is as good of a time as any.

wish me luck.



ps. it is now 11:18

damnit. i was posting a blog and my computer is retarded and it went back when i pressed the left arrow, instead of going left in the text. i hate retyping things and i hate repeating myself. crap. i’m so over this now. it’s gonna be so crappy now, because i’ll just be trying to put up what was already on here.

ugh... it just ruined this.


i’m completely over it...
summary:

life is good, except for a lot of crappy things that i listed, but am now too annoyed to list again. i should be more concerned about my life and the status of my well being... blah blah blah... living with my parents is a major part of why i’m not a functional human, and i need to move out... blah blah blah this was so much better before and now its just a grumpy summary. i should move out but can’t afford it. blah blah blah... i wanna go back to school full time, but don’t at the same time.... blah blah blah the more i summarize the less i want to publish this. i was in such a good mood and now i’m not. well i am i’m just annoyed. blech. you should have been here for the first one it was really great. go read my other blog from today about skateboarding. i’d say it here but i hate repeating myself.


this sucked you just wasted you time.

-robert

people that try to be suuuuuuper artsy, or origional, and obviously aren't really either at all, they're just putting that image on because all of their friends are. especially on myspace, what a waste of time that is.

ahh, i just dislike people that are trying to be something they're not. i mean i just try to make myself happy, and not everyone that i've ever met in my entire life. ahh. i'm just OVER it. pass me a skateboard, a video camera, my girlfriend and some gas money and let me go to salt lake city, or new york, or chicago, or califormia. anywhere but here.


i just want to leave. so what am i really over? the midwest and the plethora of kooks that surround me. I'm over scenesters, i'm over crappy bands, i'm over messy rooms, i'm over school, i'm over this, i'm over that, i'm over everyone who wears a crooked hat (that was an intentional rhyme even though its true).

ahhhh! i'm going christmas shopping now, but first i'll post a bulletin about this so people will have the opportunity to read my feelings....


here's my thought for the day: am i what i dislike so much and not even aware of it? I can never tell these sorts of things because i'm too busy trying to be myself, and be happy with who i am.

ps. my real blog is at www.robertjamestaylor.blogspot.com. i mean at least i update that more often.

uh..... let's see. it's been forever since i've posted a blog, let alone done anything this early in the morning.


lifes actually really good right now. i'm back at the Ville Grille, which i don't really hate, i mean it's good money and the crew there is pretty alright.

uh... alyssa and i have been dating for almost 7 months, and i absolutely adore her more and more each day.

i went to chicago with her, and even though we had a couple rough car rides, we had a blast. we got to see wicked (her first time and my second) and it was as wonderful as i remember.

i've been skating a lot lately, which i love. So Omaha came out, and it made me realize the amount of talent we have in the midwest. it is quite astounding, really. i've been filming a lot lately too, with some dope people. i'm totally stoked on that too, i was gonna take a loan out to get a new camera, but i'm just going to save up for it instead. that will make alyssa happy for my debt. haha

credit cards suck. i'm totally over it. i've set it aside, and i'll probably cancel it after a while. sometimes it's nice to have though. like for the ever soaring gas prices (they're going back up). it's a little rediculious though, if you really think about it.
i mean last year was the first year since the gret depression that the U.S citizens spent more money than they earned. that's called a horrible economic status people.

my personal existance is great though. i love life, and my current surrounding. i love that i'm getting to go back to school next year. i love everything, expecially alyssa. i'm going to church more, and that makes me happy. the only thing in my life that i want right now it the Canon XL-1, which can totally wait

look a new one.

i don't really have anything important to say.

i got fired again.

i had a GREAT audition yesterday, it was amazing. I had so much fun. I can't wait for school next semester. I love school, i feel like a retard not attending.

i'm finally skateboarding more. it took forever, but i'm trying to make it a priority. don't get me wrong. i still am horrible, but for me its not so much about that as much as it is about having fun. i mean i'm slowly getting better, but yeah...

I LOVE MY GIRLFRIEND. she's perfect. spending time with her is the best thing ever. besides church, but you can't really compete with Jesus.

uh.... alyssa is gonna try to get me a job as a teller at a bank.

Last spot you skated:
well i skated the box outside of rhetts house for like 10 minutes, and couldn't land anything. f/s feebles are lame anyway. but for real... we skated the highlands pool recently... nice manny pad, and deep end.

The person that makes you the happiest:
Jesus. and the a close second is Alyssa, but you can't really compair Jesus and normal people. Jesus, hands down, is my favorite dude for sure though. Gordon B. Hinckley is pretty amazing too. Lemme tell you about him: he's the mouth of God on this earth. Lds.org. check it out. I love my religion.

Last thing that made you angry:
Hearing what Molly said to Alyssa. What Mitch said is pretty lame too, but that's Mitch for you- a loser. I don't like him at all. What Molly said takes the cake though. MAN!

First though waking up this morning:
I'm going back to sleep now... I should have made my bed. I'm tired. I should call Alyssa later. Okay, back to sleep.

First thing you do every time you skate:
Freaking ollie dude. I'm so stoked on ollies. They're so great, not on film though, just to do. If you're gonna ollie something, please don't waste my film, because it'll never get used, unless it's the Amigo's gap or something.

What are you stoked on right now:
A few things:
                   1) Alyssa
                   2) Skateboarding/Filming
                   3) Theatre
                   4) Sewing Stuff
                   5) Fresh Kicks
                   6) Mormonism
                   7) Florentine Skateboards (that's on it's way though)

Last time you kissed someone:
Earlier.

Where do you live:
My parents basement in the Highlands in Lincoln, NE in the US of A

Favorite color:
Easy. Mint Green.

What do you want to be:
The owner of a successful skate company, an actor, or a costume designer. Really just doing something that makes me happy.

What cellular phone company do you go through:
U.S. Cellular. Man I love those guys down there. Rob is so tall. Every time i go it and he's working, it freaks me out, just a bit, even though we went to the same school, and I saw him every day for like 3 years.

Favorite brand:
Chocolate. Hands down. Sick team, sweet graphics. You have no Idea how many times I've watched the Hot Chocolate Tour video. It's so good. I thought I was gonna be hella into the new company Step Sister for a while, but Nate's graphic is hella gay, so nevermind. Nate is still sick though, you don't have to have a normal balance to have a deep bag of tricks.

Are you done with this yet:
Almost. We'll see, won't we?

What should you be doing:
Homework, but I suck at staying focused. So I was like I'll make this up and then get back to work. So here I am. Later Kids.



Peace.
Love
&&& GAP.

ooooo! i'm so stoked! you have no idea! I just got a sewing machine! FOR FREE! ahh! my mom's old friend henny (hennie?) can't see that well anymore so she gave it to me! It's super nice, i'll take a picture of it later, but i'm ready to sew up a storm!

I'm stoked on most of life right now, things aren't exactly the way i want them to  be, but things never are. And there's still this other thing that i want so badly, but I'm making lemonade with my lemons, right. And i know it'll work out eventually.

I made a killer mix today. Not something to get super hyped about, but hey! I think it's the high of the sewing machine that's getting to me. Plus I really love music lately. And I'm finally getting to the point where I'm happy. I'm ina great mood right now!

So, if like one more thing worked out, life would be perfect, and i'll have to write another blog, but until then i'll keep making mix CD's and loving what works for me.

I'm over being emo about crap. If it happens, I'll be happier than i've ever been in... ever! But if not, nothing will change between us, you know? I feel like i'm thinking this particular subject to death, but i can't help it. That's how i roll. Until then i'll be stoked for everything else. Dig It!

Love, Peace, and Hair Grease as Mr. Bowling would say. I love you all, and I love life. Jesus is the best guy around, and I'm not afraid to say that. If you can't handle it, DEAL! If this were me talking, it would be really fast. So yeah, i'm stoked on the proclaimers, and sean watkins and a grip of other artists and yeah. Every time i see her i still have a happy sigh, deal with it. Go take a history lesson and listen to Patse Cline, it'll do the body good. I'm so pumped for everything in the world. I love it! I can't not love it! Dang dude, i'm ditching all of my lame bad habits, and I'm gonna make everybody jealous of the sweet life i'm loving right now. If you don't know, then get to school.

I keep saying lame things that don't make sense but I'm just in a great mood. I hope this blog passes that mood onto you! If you know what song I'm listening to right now I'll give you a million dollars!!! Give up?  Letters To Cleo: I want you to want me! dude you weren't even close!!!! lame!

I just wanna go give everybody a highfive and have a heart to heart discussion with my soulmate! If you read this soulmate, make it happen, cuz if i call you, you'll be freaked out by me! I'm serious, any time, any place, I'm down. I feel like there's things that we want to say to each other but aren't. Maybe that's just me though.

 WHOOOOOOOO!!! I'M SO STOKED ON EVERYTHING!!!!

However, i am bummed on the whole bulletin thing being down, cuz i can't tell if anyone is online, but i wanna play scrabble really bad lately. Anybody wanna play? I'm stoked for Rhino!!!! You've got no idea how stoked I am right now, my mind is going like 120 miles an hour and i keep making weird decisions. I'm stoked though, so it won't change anything. I really want to kiss someone on the lips. anyone. ANYONE! it's a really weird mood, because I'm not normally like this. I feel like I'm on a drug or something, but i'm not, unless someone slipped something into my swiss cake roll or whatever i had a little bit ago. If my dad slipped me a roofie i'm gonna be so pissed!

i think it's the sewing machine. I love you all and I hope you love me too.

Have a great day/night/evening/afternoon, whatever! make it great!

peace for real this time.

later gater!

PEACE!!!!!!