http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6oRp5rdGNeA

The director's cut. A little extra something about 3 minutes in.

A lot of shit has been going on, and lately pretty much everyone in my family handles issues like a bunch of stubborn jackass. I have come up with some tips to make life easier. Follow these and I PROMISE you avoid resentment and argument, and have a LOT more respect.

1. JUST BECAUSE SOMEBODY AGREES WITH YOU DOES NOT MAKE YOU RIGHT. Most arguments, neither side is "right", and both sides have supporters.
2. HAVE AN OPEN MIND. I can not stress this enough. Most arguments over an issue, I try to come up with a solution that benefits everybody. Try to reach a compromise. Most of the time, there is a solution that benefits both. You don't always have to have a 100% win.
3. PUT YOURSELF IN THEIR SHOES. Sometimes it seems like I'm the only person in the family who tries to take the time and thought to think, "How is this making them feel? Am I REALLY being fair to them?"
4. F***ING LISTEN. Listen to their side and try to understand them instead of attacking them. Plain and simple.
5. FORGIVE. We're all humans, and we all make mistakes. Lingering on the mistakes does not do any good. Life is too short to have grudges over anything.
6. LEAVE THE ROOM if you can't hold your temper. I know what it's like trying to "talk to a brick wall", but lashing out is no god way to deal with it.
7. DON'T ASSUME YOU'RE AUTOMATICALLY RIGHT because you're the older sibling or the parent or whatever. It doesn't make your opinion more important.
8. IF ALL ELSE FAILS, JUST SAY "OKAY". If the other side is set on being a jackass and refuses to have any respect for your side, to put it frankly, f**k them. Let the baby have its bottle. Nobody respects a jackass.

That's it. If everybody could follow these simple guidelines, our lives would be much better.

Dear uncle bitch,

(aka "Soldier of Christ")
(aka "I'm 75 years old and i laugh at naming my cat mr poophead")
(aka child molster)
(aka Joan Crawford)
(aka Flo's Assbitch)
(aka Mini-Flo)
(aka buttpirate)
(aka "Look at those fuckin rat chompers")
(aka Liberace)
(aka fat ugly midget fetish)

get the point?

yeah...

You are a god damned hypocrite (no your WIFE is the hippopotamus you are the hypocrite)


don't call yourself a jesus freak. You should call yourself penis freak because you look like a penis. A penis with a mustache. That molests children. You look like a dick wearing a mustache. Why won't you be there for your own sister? My mother offered to pay everything, as usual, just so we could see our child-molesting human penis of an uncle. You abandoned your kids... why? You are a piece of shit excuse for a penis child molester rat teeth. I would like to talk to my grandfather once in my life.


have a nice day!

In Christ,

Thomas

P.S. Bible says to forgive yadayadayada

P.P.S. I dont know if fugly child molester faggy human dickface mustache shitdick rat teeth get in to heaven

P.P.S.S. Be a fucking father human penis dickhole buttmuncher cumgulper pedophile rat teeth

P.P.P.S.S. They're called braces

P.P.P.S.S.S. Mr. Poophead is a funny pet name... when you're 12.


P.P.P.P.S.S.S. cumguzzler.

We walked side by side
Through the sands of time,
Your tiny mortal hand
Clutching mine.

And you asked me, Dark master,
Where did your hoofprints go
During my hardest times?

My son, I never left you,
That was when I stood on the small of your back
And Dug my spurrs deep into your thighs.

You see that pool of blood over there?
Yeah, that's your divorce;
The second one...
The one you said you'd do anything to make it work;
You Remember that?

That was me.

Making sure the cocaine was always around.

As I ram your carcass
Through an impossibly small hole,
Into a sea of flaming hot human feces,
When you can't draw a breath,
Yet your lungs are filled
With the same flaming hot human feces

No matter how fast you run,
Or where you hide, know this:
I am always with you,
Amused by your pathetic attempts to escape,
And I laugh like this

Ha ha ha ha ha (repeat)

http://www.adultswim.com/video/?episodeID=8a25c39214b602990114b8a43a37012b

My "A" History Report from 3 years ago

 

For my oral history project I interviewed my paternal grandfather, Henry A. Roth. He spent 3 years and 10 months in service. He was drafted into the army on Oct. 22, 1942. He was later placed into the Medical Corp. where he served for the majority of the war. He never went on to become anything more than a simple wound healer, because he was afraid of losing his first patient. My grandfather spent summers in Mt. Harris working in a store 48 hours a week for 50 cents an hour. The money earned was saved for tuition at Western State College in Gunnison, CO. He was on the quarter system, and his rent cost $35.00 per month. He earned board and room at Western State as a night clerk in the Columbine hotel downtown.When he was drafted he was highly reluctant and talked to a member of the draft board hoping to be excused. One needed three years and acceptance to a Medical School. He was placed in the Medical Corp. and received basic training at Camp Barkley Texas. He was later sent to Fitzsimmons Hospital for 6 weeks in Lab school. He wanted to go overseas with his buddies who trained with him until, at Fitzsimmons, he saw the soldiers coming back. There were young men in their early twenties with horrible life time injuries. Some injuries were terrible he could not find a place to withdraw a blood sample. From then on he did every thing possible to not go overseas.My grandfather has a very high opinion of Franklin D. Roosevelt. My grandfather accredits that he is alive today because of FDR. FDR had set up in the Army a special Corp. It was called The A.S.T.P. - the Army Specialized Training Program. Five of the best graduates from Lab School were allowed to take tests to continue their education within the Army Service. My grandfather was one of them.He was sent to Washington University in St. Louis, Mo. and spent the next nine months living in a dormitory, good food, clean sheets and a fun town to go to. This was set up during the invasion of Europe, D-Day, to save the best to be the fathers of the next generation. Many of the men who trained with him were assigned as medical aid men attached to the infantry units on the beach at Normandy. Hitler's soldiers were very smart. They knew if they killed the medical aid men, and they did, it would lower the morale of an infantry unit because medical aid men were the only source of opiates to relieve pain. My grandfather thinks that he is very fortunate to have lived through D-Day in spite of this. He had college credits during these nine months.The thing my grandfather remembers most about the war is the carnage. Three years ten months and three days of his life was spent as a medical technologist in Army Hospitals. One of the duties of an M.T. was phlebotomy. This is blood sample withdrawal usually from the brachial vein in the arm. He had intimate contact with returnees and on occasion had great difficulty in finding a vein to use because of the severity of their injuries. There was always conversation between my grandfather and his patients, and my great-grandfather advised my grandfather to never, never pity someone or be pitied and this wise advice was used daily by him. War is not a solution to differences between human beings. My grandfather saw changes in civilians as well as service people. Civilians were vitally involved in defending the nation through their contributions to the Army. The biggest changes took effect after the war. The entire human effort was directed to rebuilding factories, universities, marriages, civil liberties, and a host of constructive effort. Nations Americans were taught to hate during the war became our partners and we helped rebuild them also. This was a time of optimism and enthusiasm. The mistakes of the past were to be rectified. Humans are fallible and as we know, today, we are partially successful. My grandfather had strong feelings as a pacifist and this colors his lifelong outlook. He had the good fortune to have wonderful parents. Many a childhood evening was spent hearing his mother reading to his father books on the great scientists who laid the groundwork to our present advances. The ones that captured his interest were in medical science mainly because one could relieve pain and suffering. Many events during World War II were absolutely wrong. The incarceration of Japanese nationals who were legal citizens of the United States was unconstitutional. The Atom bombing of Nagasaki and Hiroshima was inhumane and abysmally stupid as innocent people were killed and maimed. The Battle of the Bulge was a military blunder of epic proportion. The murder of millions of Jews that were tortured and cremated in Hitler's concentration camps was ignored by the Catholic Church and other seemingly moral institutions. To my grandfather, the positive outcome of the war would be the G.I. Bill of Rights which, among other wonderful things, included financial help in furthering returned veterans educational benefits and home ownership. Today, at eighty four years, my grandfather receives free medical help in any V.A. hospital. He believes that America was blessed with two outstanding presidents: Franklin D. Roosevelt and Harry S. Truman. This day he believes that he is a grandfather because of them.



I got an A for this, and my teacher singled me out of the whole class to tell me how good it was!

so I'll make fun of becky.

Hi. I'm Bukku ♥ ♥ ♥

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[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[:

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

♥ ♥ ♥


yeah...

bored.

Oh, and becky...

AAA BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

of my neice

Llamada De La Broma



If Llamada de la broma does not mean prank call please tell me what does.

Also, could somebody help me translate her message machine?