........................
I HEARD THESE DUDES ARE ASSHOLES
(What Could Possibly Go Right CD/EP, Split with Day of the
Dead)
.. ..
Once Loved
What the fuck are you so afraid of
As strong as lions but you never show you’re fucking teeth
Long enough to strike fear in the eyes of the unbelieving ones
who never question questions or attempt at anything beyond ones self
In fear we stand arms folded with our backs to the world
We choose to ignore the risk of living
And for the excuses each perfect word we use to describe why
this is more than we can- handle on our backs. The weight of being truly
fucking honest the days when being dumb and innocent were more than just
excuses. Its scares me to see the power you have on the tip of your fucking
tongue- so much inspiration goes untapped with each hand that reaches out for
you- you turn and smirk you worthless piece of shit.
We stand in amazement at what you have become a shell of
what I once loved I once looked up to I once loved
.. ..
Paint Peals
Its 1 am and that tow trucks not here
It was due an hour ago
I’m counting high beams in hope of killing time
I have had too many longest nights of my life
Spelling destiny in gasoline… writing passages in sulfur
stains
So this is it this is how we die
So if this time isn’t like the rest
If I could only be so lucky
Inside jokes that tell our stories
I’m such a serious dude
Now pacing highways on cell phones
This is such a waist of time
But this time won’t be the last this time won’t be
So one day I won’t be totally angry
And one day ill be short on words
But freedom comes with a price but
Holy shit, who fucking cares?
This time it’s for me
This time it’s for us
So fuck you fuck you
And ill never say stop
.. ..
Adhering to Superstition
I remember just how it used to be. When the nights were fucking ours and
the sunrise made me feel so fucking sick. Things were much simpler and those
summers last too long but this feeling was as depressing as the day my eyes met
yours.
We always talk about getting caught up in the moment getting wrapped up in situations
saying words we can never take back. A four letter word, the most
beautiful of things but the one I used on you is the one I wish I truly could
mean.
I never said a thing I only half meant. I dropped hints at being the worst man
for the job. I’ve smashed clocks, broken mirrors the man in the
reflection the one I truly hate the most.
I want my life back. Days spent months spent years spent saying if I had a time
machine hell yea
.. ..
Lock Jaw
Again you open your mouth so quickly spewing out sentence fragments
explaining your belief in fairytales.
Those superheroes- those pages of assholes that supposedly set moral
standards… with every ancient text shit onto paper explaining how we live our
lives I could give less of a fuck what you believe…but to each there fucking
own-
There is nothing after this we are all going to rot
So I believe we are the godless we are the doomed
Too much of a good thing can make a man choke so before I
vomit take a step back you are not me
It takes guts to stand against modern day society and we
will never fall in the line with the fucking sheep. Whom herd towards a relic forged in deceit placed
in pride as a reminder of a finger that never stops shaking at you when in
there eyes you have committed a wrong against the cloth.
This is my rebuttal this is my counteroffer I will fear you
no fucking more.
.. ..
Getting Over the Overs
Yeah. Now I fucking get it what you meant when you said
moving as far as I can will change everything
I never understood it than but I understand it now the
options are slim-the placements perfect no one knows me here
And all those
minutes I spent screaming at the wall. Hoping maybe your picture could answer
back and sometimes yes sometimes I wish I didn’t care. Yes sometimes I wish I could never hear your
voice. Than maybe this would be easy-maybe this would be as simple as the way I
hurt you with out thought or reason without a shred of compassion… and for the
fuck ups I’m never coming home.
It’s so easy when there is someone else to blame
But I see that same fucking face every fucking day.
I’m spending every second wishing I could take it all back
And you were so fucking different
This is the end
I never got it I never knew what you meant
You only appreciate someone when there fucking gone
And you kept drinking, until I didn’t exist well I’m sorry
I’m sorry I’m desperate I’m sorry and for once I’m speechless.
.. ..
Out Go the Candles
Broken knuckles bleeding Foreheads
Shirt collars I’m still grabbing
Accusations rolling eyes
Reasons I’m still pulling my hair out
Those fucking cords stretched through broken glass never
summed up so much. All of this to be raped of self esteem and expose my fucking
self
Tonight
What could possibly go right?
What could possibly go fucking right?
To every toothless fucking grin (You are the few)
I’m sick of saying this is just not worth this shit.
For every kid that’s waiting to die
(You know our names) I’m sick of saying
This is just not worth this shit.
No point in thinking this will all work out
So many days I could do with out but the point of it all is
to never look back so I live for today and die by the night these veins are
burning fucking red and this is when I can’t turn back.
What could possibly go right
.. ..
A Bridge Too Many
It’s not my fault what you did with your life
It’s not my fault that your dreams died with addiction
This was never about who was better than who but I got out
and you never changed.
But fuck that town it gets the best of
The young, hopeful, bright eyed, lonesome, daring, fearless,
fucked up… they ant going no where.
Still begging for a chance but lacking motivation
Still searching for a reason for being born
Some would say the few, the proud, the worthless
But this ones for the blind from broken homes
Remember when
Remember when
You said, you did
Anything any thing
That fucking
Mattered
.. ..
Six by six
And wait before you open your mouth. When your advice was fucking needed I was no
where. I was no where to be seen. I have taking advice much less needed before,
but yours could of changed it all it yours could have been worth the time. You old fool; you thought you knew it all.
And for that I savor each day for that I am in your debt.
The greatest thing you ever said was to just be happy
No matter what the fucking cost.
Now on that day I listened loud and clear I heard every
fucking word
If not for bad luck I would have none and some days I still
feel like shit
And when it rains it fucking pours and when it rains its
fucking pours when it rains when it rains it fucking pours.
And I'm digging ditches but I'm still smiling, I'm still
smiling I'm still
.. ..
SPLIT WITH DAY OF THE DEAD
.. ..
Dear ....Philadelphia....
Tonight I’m screaming those words that I wanna regret
How truly honest can one man be to only drop those subtle
hints but I was never that kind of person I always put it on the tablelaid all
my cards out smiling with a stupid fucking grin. Never faced the fucking
problem of not being trusted because I never let a single story go untold, feel
free to judge me for what I have done it’s the reason I put it out. I never wanted that colorful tapestry behind
me to go unnoticed allowing all to see how truly ugly I was or I can be
But I can’t take back a single action I made
No I can’t change the man I watched die
But you have heard all my stories
You made the right choice
You will never
Get fucking burned
.. ..
Sincerely
I wanna hear it, those precious fucking words, those
compelling beautiful songs that grab a hold and never let go. I need to know what makes you fucking tick if
it’s you or days lived by those who are already fucking dead. Destroy your self
for me please let me know there’s something that lives beyond your record
collection. Maybe I live entirely for this feeling of waking up expecting it to
all fall apart.
You wouldn’t know some words are worth more than plastic smiles
That I can never produce
I thrive for heartbreak thrive for the let downs. And I only
relate to the ones who know how to live there life on there sleeves. Expressing
ourselves for a chance to lose it all and we are the ones who have nothing.
.. ..
PREPARE TO BE LET DOWN
.. ..
Bottom line: Fuck You
I gave up on metaphors and acts of sarcastic wit. Rewording
phrases in an attempt to grab the approval of faces I may never know. I’ve only met a few people that deserve this
smile. Yes I’m fucking ok and please
don’t ask me again.
I can not stop
dwelling on the fucking past.
Disillusion the only thing that keeps me warm at night.
.. ..
.. ..
The Lives we Fear
Maybe if I said something a bit more meaningless than
possibly I could make my father proud of the things I’ve done.
Throw blood, reckless, onto paper.
You can’t expect me to take the same roads so many have
crawled down before. I am fine with dying with regrets as long as I’ve never
stopped making attempts at the sky and tearing down the stars. It never felt right to sit back-letting life
pass me by. Saying I could have, would
have but never fucking tried. ....Ill....
takes my chances with the late nights, the bitter arguments. We’ll get by on
the skin of our teeth I’ve never needed more
....Ill....
takes my chances with the harsh criticism and the failed relationships
We’ll get by on the skin of our teeth I’ve never need more
I have it all, I never needed more than a bag full of
clothes and a fucked up van. Just give
me 20 minutes to sweat out the feeling give me 20 minutes to run my self
dead. This is my outlet, this is my mid
life crisis. Though it started at 16 I don’t plan on seeing 30.
....Ill....
stays thankful for the hand outs, thankful for the chance
That Stone Better Be on Fire
And what the fuck do I know?
But broken hearts, some unsung songs
I never had it hard it enough
So I drag my feet as much as I can
The product of excuses
Brave only compared to some
I consider myself a lucky kid
But I’m pretty good at fucking up
Young, Angry and White
A victim of the middle class
So much to prove
So much to say
When will I be done screaming?
Never take me seriously
Cause who the fuck am I
Just some awkward kid
From a shitty town
No different than any of you
Quick with exaggeration
Philosopher to some
But a story teller to anyone
Who, is truly listening
I’m inspired by
The fact that I
Still get out of bed
I’m over dramatic
Most of the time
Attention whore,
Known to be ill tempered
I got a way with fucking words
.. ..
.. ..
40 Miles North
And here where the suburbs are no better than the city. Where taking your own life is more than just
an option. Some make you think that it’s easier to just turn walk away... I went
running as fast as I can screaming into the streets. What the fuck happened to my closest friends?
It’s a type of arrogance that grows in you from being from here. Knowing so
many look down on you for the sake of the walls you traced your hand prints on.
Who the fuck are they to judge? No credit giving to the ones breaking
barriers, redefining the appeal of chalk lines. Well I won’t be ignored, I
won’t be confused
Hear me
The only fire I would ever start here is so that you can
never say you didn’t notice us, you didn’t notice us.
.. ..
.. ..
A Song for the Beggars
So here’s your song and the words you asked for but I’m sure
it’s not what you wanted. It’s not
beautiful or gracious it’s a warning to anyone who has yet to meet you. Don’t
tell me your sorry because I’m pretty sure I promised myself I would never ever
again believe a single thing you say.
Seek your attention elsewhere tell him how many times someone stepped on
your heart. But he’ll have to take a
fucking number, because those eyes are an amazing thing. But who knows, on you what’s even fucking
real.
Go ahead say it tell him all how you were crushed. How
perfect you can be but don’t forget to mention how far you can spread your
legs. I’m sure that will get there fucking
attention. Yea I’m sure, yea I’m sure you’ll get just what you need. Fuck Fuck
Fuck
And we all know the things you’ve done no need to tell us
because everyone fucking talks
Oh yea.
Waste your tears on somebody else
You’ll find acceptance on your back.
Long Time Coming
6 months from the day I wrote any of these songs. They may mean as much as the changing of the
tides. This reoccurring trend of hello
and goodbye leads me to believe- that I know I’ve been here with you before.
Yes I know ill say some things that make you wish we hadn’t tried again. I’m
tired of apologizing for that fucking flaw.
I’m tired of saying I’m sorry for not holding on to long but ill cut my
losses before it’s too hard. I waste you’re fucking time. You don’t need me and I’m breaking fingers...
Take my advice and walk away. I’m a loner Dottie, a fucking rebel.
Repetition
It’s just as cold here as I left it and it’s the end of
August. There’s no change at all anymore just faces and occasionally the tone
of voice. ....Ill.... probably fall asleep on my couch again,
watching some Cusack movie. I’ve played
the ghost here for far to fucking long.
There is nothing appealing here just concrete and
memories. Brick by brick are the walls I
call home. Didn’t you know I’d rather be
anywhere but here? In a few months it’ll
start all over again. Again and again I need to let go. Of every word I never
said, of every promise remaining unfulfilled for what its worth this is who I
am. Repetition is all I know.
.. ..
.. ..
Choke On It
Respects given where it’s fucking due. And ill tip my hat for what you have
done. But that doesn’t mean I have to
give a shit bout your opinions. You’ve
never walked a step in my shoes. I’ll
stick my foot in my mouth every chance that I get. I fumble with words, a little self
conscience, sometimes a tad bit awkward.
I try do get my point across, aint planning on changing minds. My life’s
an open book, what about you?
I’ll find out the hard way that I’m not always right
Take the best shots from people who remain nameless. Not sorry for my intentions and ill do what I
fucking please Call me out I don’t give a fuck you’re not better than me
.. ..
When the Mourning Ends.
Don’t tell me you love me
Just tell me you will not leave
Cause tonight is one of those nights
When I’m only interested in one fucking thing
I got a lot of dependency issues
And needless to say I hate to be alone
You may not be important to me tomorrow
But right now you’re all that I fucking got
I won’t mislead and I will not lie
You’ll know my intentions before you walk through the door
I may speak with clever gestures
Anything to make you feel at ease
Please don’t say this is forever
I tend to forget what that word means
I’m more interested in the “right now’s”
Just please promise you won’t leave
I’ve made choices that have got me no where but back to
where I started. This all may be a
mistake, but what’s a few more. I’ve been
told that I have baggage. Well I’ve lived, loved, fucked and will die as young
as I possibly can. But for right now I
just can’t be alone.
.. ..
Sleepless
I could say almost anything right now
I’m not too good with closed lips. I’m not too good with
awkward silences
And with a slip of my tongue... those nights turn to shit,
this friendship could turn to shit. Thrown to the wind, every breath, every
word, every action defined in a second of my thoughtless emotions
Taking a chance with our time spent sitting and laughing
about embellished stories, regaling each other with our most embarrassing
moments. You’ll chain smoke the night
away and ill keep talking to the point that most would be annoyed but you never
say shut your fucking mouth. I would give anything to say what I think right
now.
Ask me a question and ill do my best to not lie but if I say
what’s truly on my mind. You are the price I‘d pay.
.. ..
Kiss that Mother Fucker
Goodnight
Eye to eye, ill keep my composure
Hands shaking and these fists will be tightly clenched
I want it back, I’ll say for the first time.
Every ounce of fucking air you’ve never appreciated
If this is all that I am a series of choice words you’ll
never hear this angelic voice again. I’m tired of talking in circles explaining
what you don’t get; you’ve never lost, never loved, never ever fucking lived.
You left me for dead once. How could I forget? Now I can see
right through your hollow empty eyes, I will never again go unnoticed.
Say this is jealousy that I’m feeling well then I’m fine
with that. You have a certain
characteristic that gives you the means to not feel a fucking thing for anyone
that isn’t you. Now tell me you’re not
fucking selfish. For every kind hearted
word that I spoke to you. I beg I could
take back every syllable you ripped from my mouth as I screamed for you to
understand. What it feels like to not be
as important to someone as they are to you. Well I’ve been on both ends and my
lesson was learned. So I tell the
stories of collapsed lungs so maybe the fortunate could get a fighting chance
to just cut and fucking run.
Fuck saying the right things- I’m sick of being your
crutch. I will never pick you up
again. Don’t show me that face, you know
the one that I’m talking about. You will
never get under my skin again. Not another word. Not sorry for shit... I’m leaving you breathless broken alive
.. ..
HELL IS EMPTY
.. ..
I’m Out
Those heavy thoughts I let linger when the sun goes down.
I don’t need this shit anymore. I can finally see it’s over my desire to hold
on to old pictures and thoughts about crush’s I can not relive.
Looks like I am on my way out, it’s been a long time coming.
Looks like you can bond to someone else’s failures.
You can blame me if you want. You can hate me if you want
I have nothing more to give. I have nothing more to say.
I’m gone
Blame me judge me use me
Blame me judge me hate me
.. ..
.. ..
.. ..
Two Words
Hello you fuckers, you assholes, you social rejects…
I hope you get my sarcasm as I generalize our subculture
That once had the biggest of mouths. Now scared to just speak up, scared of
prepubescent teens with the fastest hands or has-been role models who gave in
to their own cynicism. I might seem jaded, I might seem arrogant. However
I am a dude of many opinions which I encroach on every open
ear. I find it offensive when someone
cowards behind tight lips. Save face for the sake of social status,
prostitution with a pretty face.
No approval here not bought with pride, all loss for some
one else’s gain.
Keep your mouth shut. Keep your eyes straight- a -head.
You might make it out of here unscathed but devoid of
purpose.
Mediocrity is a fucking cancer; it seems air born and
contagious.
I found myself here-when I didn’t fit-most anywhere else.
Now I find it hard to relate to the most familiar of faces.
Don’t Care
Pardon my apathy and my articulation with cheap childish
phrases but I hate the excuses I give this nothing more then these two words
Fuck it
How cliché this all sounds.
This was made for the individual but is ruined by the ignorant masses.
.. ..
Dead Weight
The ones born in shit with no remorse or no regret, watch
the foundation break we laugh as we take. Born the son of a carpenter and
highschool secretary, bread blue collar in a white trash town, with just enough
to lose. But I learned the value in wanting nothing because then no one can
take anything from you. I watched the heart of my old man get overworked for
the sake of a dollar. Worried that love might only, be found, in the amount of
things you leave behind when you die. I started driving nails at an early age
for a class of people their god forgot. For the ingrates who never knew the
pain of callous hands for the bottom feeder waiting for their hand out.
This is humanities true face, middle aged and fully capable
but not willing to sweat. Who think they
are better than that, as if born with some form of entitlement. The punch line
in this joke, we are angels at birth but true sinners and always looking for a
hustle. I was born a fortunate son. But
I learned early on if you want to live, you got to suffer, you got to be
willing to bleed. I was born a fortunate
son. But I learned early on if you want to live, you got to suffer, you got to
be willing to die. (Empty handed). I go
day to day with a chip on my shoulder I can not shake for a generation of
leaches who seem to think that life owes them something more than a right to
breathe. Life owes me nothing but a cold
deep grave and a promise to never wake me up when I close my eyes, let me close
my eyes. Please let me close my eyes.
.. ..
Part One
Is this the beginning?
I always look towards the end.
It starts as a pleasant drive and ends in a fiery car
crash.
Hope isn’t in question it’s a question of how many times you
can repeat the same fucking feelings.
Before you go numb you always roll the dice. We always try, try again.
It’s our natural instinct or maybe its just boredom but no one ever thinks they
can live being just one. One time it will be the real thing, next time it will
be the real thing, condition ourselves to think there is a real thing.
The excitement is shared as the feeling is mutual. The attraction is real and not just for the
flesh. Simple excuses just to hear
someone’s voice that feeling of sickness when you are too far to touch. Its
hopeless now, no turning back, you’re in over your head with no want for
air. You say the things you thought
you’d never say again and in the back of your mind you wish you never could.
This time around you won’t fuck it up you won’t get tongue
tied you won’t trip over your feet you’ll be attentive you won’t be selfish you
learned your lesson you won’t fuck it up
.. ..
Part Two
The two of us we burned like shining stars
We flicker then faded now it’s a fucking black whole
Crushing our lungs, we broke our hearts
The tears didn’t flow until the front door shut
The jokes went stale and we forgot how to laugh
Some good things they never will stand a chance
I guess you and me baby we were doomed from start
I should have stayed on the road and never came back
Sometimes I think I could have tried just a bit more then I
did but I’d be lying to myself if I
thought it would have helped
Not everybody is meant to be no body is meant for me
I don’t need your pity I don’t need your time
....Ill....
just borrow love I borrow lies I tell myself a lot of thing
I sleep alone a lot of nights I’m in love with a lot of lies
No one saves me from me, from me Ill always blame myself
Some habits never change I love a train wreck I love a sad song Maybe I do this
for me maybe you were right about maybe you were right about me. Some good
things aren’t meant to be Nothing is meant for me
There is no fairy tale ending
There is no happily ever after
You just live, you just die but maybe you’re a lucky one
.. ..
Convenient Gods
I am pride. I am discouragement. Self loathing, but
egotistical, an ignorant fuck. An
average heathen who just waits for their turn to speak. Convinced in thinking they know when their
end will be.
But I am shit no different and no better. Similar skin
stretched over similar bone. I want answers for coming days. I want a reason for what was and what will
be. I try to look to no god, nor any
man. I see that a weakness at best. But
in our dire moments we need something to blame. We turn to a light we will
never see
You need me more than I need you.
I wish that was true, I wish that was true.
Faith is humanities answer for the fear they can not face.
A fear that we are with out purpose, that we are truly
alone.
.. ..
Meat
In a minute now ....Ill....
be feeling like a cold front cut through the room
You kindly wave I awkwardly smile not sure what to say
But it’s inevitable you bat yours eyes I crumble I always
crumble
How are you you will say I exchange politely
Not again, no
I can’t do it I won’t do it Alright I’m so pathetic
No matter how far I distance myself
one glance you can pull me back in
In an instant my knees weaken my hands sweat and I begin to
break
Ill give in when you pop the question your place or mine
How I wish I had the confidence to tell you I can’t be what
you need
I can’t always be the skin that you wear
When you are cold at night
When no one else is there to make you alive
I know we are both one and the same.
But when it’s over the satisfactions gone
We will both just be stains on the sheets.
.. ..
Loneliest of Hearts
He clinches his fist as he swings for the fucking fences
His since of abandon keeps him from deaths door.
Blown knees and torn fucking muscles heart made of steel
These are the hours he never wants back this is the price
that you pay for glory. Or maybe a since of fulfillment very few can appreciate
the silence. The cold calm when nothing is left standing in your way. This is
joy in its greatest moment shared only with the truly selfish, in a place where
only the lonely ever choose to stand and die. Behind every drop of sweat, eyes
unfazed and devoid of feeling.
Love, has no place here. Our hearts beat a lone
.. ..
Committed
You want honesty its all I got. I’ve been bleeding to death, why can’t I
stop. As I grew older, I grew angry. I got memoirs filled of shitty
stories. Now sometimes I don’t know
myself. If this is an act, was an act I
forgot my fucking part. I spend my nights typing away so maybe some day Ill get
over not knowing me. These are my gut’s,
these are my insides, my exaggerations of wanting to die. It’s not always a
joke, but I never lie. Take what you
will when you read between these lines.
Now sometimes I don’t know myself.
If this is an act, was an act I forgot my fucking part. I spend my
nights, typing away, so maybe some day ill get over not knowing me, you don’t know
me, I don’t know me. This is the place you go when you don’t hate yourself
enough to beat your head against a wall.
We are but songs and throat scraping melodies, but still a far cry from
any real tragedy.
.. ..
Solitary
Hey mike what the fuck are you thinking? And where did you
go with my Fathers gun. I still don't believe it but think about it I'd blame
you too. But that was years ago and this isn’t that story. This is my concern for where you will end up.
Remember when I told you, you needed to find god. That's pretty funny now.
You've always been more comfortable between cement walls, just inches from
hell. The isolation made you see in black and white. See the world as a truly
empty and desolate place, with nothing to offer someone like you.
When Danny died I know you wanted to take his place. But that wasn’t your fault. Sometimes no matter how far you run, trouble
just comes looking for you. You know
that feeling well.
Stop blaming yourself for what you couldn’t do. Stop blaming yourself for what you’ve
lost. It’s hard to say that you aren’t
the same. That something in you changed.
Maybe it was never there at all but most of us have a glimmer of a
future in the back of our eyes.
Move on from this place.
There has to be some where that your demons won’t find you, where all
your devils don’t know you’re alive.
.. ..
DEAD WEIGHT EP- EXCLUSIVE TRACK
.. ..
Constrictor
Trust on this hill is a fucking joke
Built on constriction and loaded words
They have their own agenda, have their own plan
Power loves power at the end of the day
Good and bad don’t always apply. Some fuckers don’t have two sides. They feed on the unaware. Feed on the victims
Feed on your will. Feed on your weakness
You are a mouse among snakes, my love, filled of good
intentions. Too bad no ones give’s a
fuck about your ideals
The difference between right and left is a fine fucking line
between morals and profit or which major corporation is filling the stomach of
the face that best represents them.
Trust on this hill is a fucking joke
Built on constriction and loaded words
They have their own agenda, have their own plan
Power loves power at the end of the day
Good and bad don’t always apply. Some fuckers don’t have two sides. They feed on the unaware. Feed on the victims
Feed on your will. Feed on your weakness
You’d like to believe that everyone has just a little
decency inside. But I’ve never known a snake to ever feel sorry for its prey.
.. ..