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Chronicles of the Curtislovakian Empire... The official voice of His Most High Potentate and Ruler of the Sovereign Realm of Curtislovakia

Curtis



Last Updated: 11/17/2009

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Gender: Male
Status: In a Relationship
Age: 37
Sign: Pisces

City: KANSAS CITY
State: Missouri
Country: US
Signup Date: 11/12/2005

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Thursday, November 12, 2009 11:29 PM

Category: Blogging
Thought I'd update everyone on the progress that I have made to raise money for Paul Burns' medical expenses.

Let's start at the beginning, shall we?

In the very early morning hours of Sunday, November 8, Kansas City Actor/Director Paul Burns was thrust into the middle of a physical altercation that left him with one hundred and fifty stitches in his face. In an effort to try to protect a friend who was physically incapable of protecting himself, Paul nearly lost his life, the blade that cut him missing his Jugular by a couple of millimeters. He was treated and released at a nearby emergency room, and is recovering very nicely. Because Paul has no medical insurance, he not only has to suffer the emotional aftermath of being attacked and scared for life, but he also has to suffer the financial hardships of being on the hook for emergency room fees.

That's why his friends have decided to try and raise some money to help alleviate the additional stress of that financial albatross. I can tell you I'm working on two events (not without lots of help, let me assure you!), though I'm positive there is more going on.

On November 20, 8:00 pm at the Alcott Center, there will be an evening of performance, music, a silent auction, food and drink (adult and otherwise). There will be a $12 cover at the door, and inside you will find libation in exchange for your further donation. Doors will open at 7:30.

Also, on December 3rd, The Riot Room in Westport will host a benefit concert featuring my band, The Family Band Massacre. Details to come!

Proceeds exceeding Paul's needs will be donated to the Kansas City Free Health Clinic at Paul's request.

If you cannot make either event, but would still like to contribute, paypal users can send funds to cskippy2000@aol.com, or you email cskippy2000@aol.com for information on where to send a check. If you'd like to participate in the event on the 20th, Let me know at the aforementioned email address, or you can message me on facebook.

Please come out and help make this a huge success. A lot of people have donated their time and services to this cause, and I hope you come enjoy the event. Paul deserves it.

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Thursday, March 12, 2009 9:32 PM


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Wednesday, February 11, 2009 7:00 PM

Current mood:Terrified

Hosted By:
Kansas City Horror Club

When:
Friday, February 13, 2009

Where:
Merriam Cinemark
5500 Antioch
Merriam, KS
66202

Description:
Join us at Merriam Cinemark @ 7:00 this Friday for an 8:00 Screening of Friday the 13th! After, there's a party at Fat Matt's Vortex.

Click Here To View Event
Thursday, January 08, 2009 1:32 AM

Current mood:  annoyed
Category: Blogging
I was compelled to email the following to our entire department at work....

Dear Colleagues,

In an effort to keep our work environment happy, I would respectfully request that everyone keep the bathroom doors closed at all times.

 You see, because of my office location and the wind currents that seem to converge here, leaving the bathroom door closed at all times will drastically reduce the chances of your coming to work and finding your entire office covered in double sided tape, or returning from lunch to find your keyboard completely re-mapped, or your desk covered with spongebob shelf paper, or finding your office is newly located in the Jammin' room, while Greg's drum kit has been moved into your place.

 I ask out of respect, because I know me, and I know the great lengths to where I am prepared to go. I am powerless in the face of the opportunity to show my deep affection for you by jello-molding your stapler, or subscribing you to any number of free publications about knitting or the nation of islam or professional wrestling, or scheduling a garage sale in your office for a Tuesday morning. I was even toying with the idea of hiring some elderly actor friends to do an entire reading of Titus Andronicus at a scheduling meeting. That's three hours of awesome Shakespeare, folks. Help me protect you from my own inability to control my dastardly impulses. Just close the door behind you, please.

 Your immediate attention in this matter would be greatly appreciated. Actually, your immediate inattention would be more fun, but honestly, Steve and Kevin would rather see me use my powers for good.

 Best Regards and hopes for your continued good mental health, as mine is directly proportional to the quality of the air that seems to settle here.

Curtis

Fuckin' poopers.

Monday, January 05, 2009 11:18 PM

Current mood:excited
Category: Music
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Sunday, December 21, 2008 12:52 AM


What they said....

"Your Project Playlist widget has been removed from your profile in
response to copyright complaints. We are sorry for the inconvenience,
but it is absolutely imperative that MySpace respect the rights of
copyright owners, artists and record labels.

Isn't Online Music Free?

No,
MySpace, Rhapsody, Napster, Imeem, Yahoo Music, Pandora, Last.FM all
pay fees to the artist and record labels for the rights for you to play
their music online. It may seem free to you, but if it's legal, someone
is probably paying for you to hear the music.

Don't I Have the Right to Listen to Songs I Purchased on Amazon, MySpace, iTunes or on CD in My Project Playlist Player?

No,
buying the album or song does not give you the right to put the songs
in your Project Playlist Player, or upload them to MySpace, or upload
them to any file sharing service.

When will I be able to use a Project Playlist music player on MySpace again?

As
soon as their legal situation is settled, and the artists are getting
paid, MySpace will consider re-enabling the embedding of Project
Playlist music players.

Where Do I Get Legal Playlists for My Profile?

Imeem, Last.FM, iLike, and MySpace Music are all good options.

Thanks for your understanding,
MySpace"

What I say...

"Fuck you, you meddling pricks."


Wednesday, December 10, 2008 7:25 PM

Current mood:yummy
Category: Food and Restaurants

Doing my best from memory.....

I got a bag of those frozen chicken breasts. three pounds of 'em. You could use a whole 3lb chicken, cut into pieces, but you don't need to. So..

Preheat your oven to 400 degrees.

Get yourself a casserole dish big enough to put your chicken in, in a single layer. Put a stick and a half of butter in it, and set it in the oven until the butter melts.

In a quart sized ziploc bag or something, put six tablespoons of flour, a tablespoon ground ginger and one and a half teaspoons of salt.

take your breasts and pat them dry with a paper towel. Then do the same with the chicken.

Your butter should be pretty well melted, so take it out of the oven.

dredge each piece of chicken in the gingery flour and place in the casserole dish, coating thoroughly with the melted butter. Then wash your hands because you don't want that chicken bacteria to give you chicken herpes or whatever.

Place chicken in the oven for 20 minutes.

Stage 1 is complete, on to preparing the glaze. This can easily be done while the chicken is in the oven. I have trouble timing things, so I thought I'd say that. Maybe you don't have that trouble. Don't judge me.

In a medium mixing bowl, put one tablespoon of curry powder, two tablespoons ketchup, 1 cup beef stock, two tablespoons flour (I think one is enough, but I haven't tried that), one tablespoon of sugar (here's an example of where you could get away with that splenda crap or some other sugar substitute), and a couple teaspoons of lemon juice,
which I didn't have, so I left out. No big whoop. Mix all that together and then add a diced apple. The recipe says to peel it before you dice it, but fuck that. I likes mah apple skin. Stir that up.


Now, set that aside for a bit and dice six slices of bacon. That's right, bacon. Add to a pan and cook it 'till it's nice and brown and crispy and made of awesome. The recipe said to add the rest of the stuff in the bowl at this point, but it didn't say to drain the bacon first. I did drain the bacon and I think that was an error, but fuck it, less fat is ok. Anyway, add the appley goo from the bowl into the bacon and cook for a bit, until you pretty much have a crazy delicious brown roux. stir constantly. This shit gets SUPER thick, so you might want to
add beef stock until it's not so thick. that's why I think two
tablespoons of flour is too much. It's like 'Behold, the power of
flour.'


When the glaze is cooked, you'll be able to tell. Really
it's more like a chutney or something. Pull it off the heat. Throw a cover on it and let it set until I tell you to do something with it.


It should be getting close to time to pull the chicken out by now.

After 20 minutes of cooking pull the chicken out and flip it, coating it with butter again. Starting to smell good, huh? After you flip it, put it back in the oven for another twenty minutes. Go watch tv or something, or use this time to clean what you've wrecked. Or smoke some pot, then clean while the tv is blasting in the other room.

When your buzzer goes off again, pull the chicken out of the oven and lay the glaze over each piece, then ladle some of the butter in the pan over the top of that. Put it back in the oven for another 20 minutes. If you're counting, that will make sixty minutes total cooking time.

When that's done, pull it out, baste it again if you want, give it five or ten minutes, then eat it. Maybe you can make some kind of rice dish to serve with it in that last forty minutes of baking, but me being a diabetic, I didn't bother. Green beans worked fine.

Hope you enjoy. Serves about six. But really, you won't want to share.



Thursday, November 13, 2008 9:38 PM

Category: Blogging
From the Fox 4 News website....

"HARRISONVILLE, MO. -- Metro Squad investigators have released a composite sketch of a man they want to talk to in connection with a murder in Harrisonville.

Cara Robert, 30, was found shot to death by her husband on the floor of their home November 5.

Police said the sketch is of a man who was seen in the area of the murder."

Well, here is the sketch....


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This is really a no-brainer.

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It was Red Foreman. Case Closed.

Currently listening:
Freebird The Movie: Music From The Motion Picture
By Lynyrd Skynyrd
Release date: 1996-08-13
Tuesday, November 04, 2008 12:11 AM

Current mood:  awake
Category: Music
           

Currently watching:
The Office: Seasons 1 - 4 Collection
Release date: 2008-09-02
Friday, October 31, 2008 5:25 AM

Current mood:  grateful
Category: Blogging
Sometimes, as the Severed Right Hand, I get to do something cool.

I was invited to attend a preview of the new, completely redesigned, Fork and Screen wing at the AMC 30 in Olathe. It was amazing, and I'll tell you why…

Just keep in mind I'm not wealthy and I watch my expenditures as carefully as I'm able.

Upon arrival, I was handed a press pack, very professional, and it will be very helpful as I compose this, as you need the correct details. I joined a group of other bloggers, and we would all shortly be taken on a tour of the place. I should tell you what the place is, I reckon.

Out in Olathe, at the AMC Studio 30 Theater, they have taken an entire wing of theaters and transformed them into something called "The Fork and Screen." Let me attempt to give you a mental picture of what I saw as I walked through for the first time.

As I walked in the main entrance to the theater, to my left I saw the "Fork and Screen" sign at the entrance to that wing of the building. There was a concierge desk there, and it was explained to us by our guide that anyone with a ticket to any movie in the theater is welcome to enjoy a tasty libation and nosh at the new bar, "MacGuffins" at the end of the hall. Presumably, your eligibility would be verified at that concierge desk, which is a pretty slick and a nice way of making things feel a little exclusive. I like that. I suppose you could slip the concierge a twenty, but I doubt it would help you in any way, but it would help the concierge.

As we walked past the concierge desk and down the hall, I was kind of caught up in the displays lining the hallway. Encased in glass were little tableaus of famous movie bits. It was explained that the word "MacGuffin" was coined by Hitchcock to describe a plot device that motivates the characters or advances the story, but the details of which are of little or no importance otherwise. Clever, huh? The displays showed excellent MacGuffin examples, like the suitcase from pulp fiction, the one ring from LoTR, the map staff from Raiders of the Lost Ark, etc. They will be changing the displays from time to time, and it wouldn't surprise me a bit if they got actual props from the movies to fill out the displays later on. If they hadn't thought of that, well, there's your first suggestion, AMC. Hope you liked it.

Architecturally, the interior of MacGuffins, which greets you at the end of the hall, is bright, lively, and cheerful. The repetition of circles in the carpet, and in the details around the bar area, like the handrails and tables, is a reinforcement of the logo design for the Fork and Screen, which symbolizes libation, food, and service. Suffice to say there are circles EVERYWHERE. Do not look down if you have recently ingested a psychotropic substance. Or do. The carpets are trippy.

The layout of MacGuffins is pretty cool. It's open, with high ceilings and two levels of seating, but it still manages to feel intimate. It has the feel of those old time night clubs where Bogart would hang and the Rat Pack would perform.

The bar itself has an interesting feature that you'll just have to check out for yourself (very cool lighting device inset into the surface), but the wall of alcohol behind it made me wonder if practicality was a consideration. I mean, how do you reach a bottle of gin that's 15 feet over your head? My guess is it's just a display, and that's enough to keep me from asking too many questions. The drink prices were above what I expected them to be. It felt like, as I experienced sticker shock at every turn, that as a rule they were applying the same markup to the drinks and food as they do the candy and soda counter in the main lobby. It would behoove the Manager of that bar to consider drink specials that encourage people to actually purchase drinks that do not have free refills. Like it or not, as I consider the Fork and Screen for future Horror Club events, prices are a factor above service. I, as will many Horror Club minions like me, will sacrifice service for cost. Perhaps the location is to be taken into account, being in Johnson County, which is much more affluent as a whole. Still, I was beginning to feel a bit on the 'excluded because I'm poor' side. I mean, as a general rule, I won't pay seventeen fifty for a bucket of five bud lights. Having someone deliver that to me isn't worth the extra dough. Is it wrong for me to look for a bargain here, to see the cost and compare it with value?

In the bar, we were offered a sampling of the appetizers they offer while exploring the MacGuffin space. It was pretty standard faire; cheese Sticks, little pizzas, quesadillas, etc., really not anything spectacular or unique, and not much that would be considered healthy save the veggie tray, which was the only appetizer that wasn't fried, which did concern me a bit, and again, expensive for what they were. They did have one thing that made me oh so very happy. They make their own potato chips, which were amazing! I ended up ordering that with my meal, as well as putting a big dent in what was laid out for us. They were just wonderful. The rest of the appetizers were very, very tasty too, just not unique. I don't know why I expected everything to be so unique. I suppose I got caught up in the newness of it all, and was hoping for something I couldn't prepare myself out of the frozen section at Hy-Vee. I'm far from saying that what they served was out of a bag. That's hardly the case. The quality is very high, and the portions seem adequate. I'm just saying a nine dollar appetizer should be unique and have some excitement. It should have a quality that says, "I know this is really expensive, but DAMN it's worth it." I have no doubt that as the Chef works out the details of his menu; he'll accept the challenge I've kind of laid out here, and rock it like a hurricane. I met him. He seems nice.

So after milling about noshing and chatting, we continued the tour into one of the two entrances on either side of the bar, into the Cinema Sweets side on the right. Again we were greeted by a concierge to assist in seating. This is where a little extra cost becomes TOTALLY WORTH IT. The press release describes these intimate theaters as, "the ultimate in luxury movie going at an affordable price." Leather recliners, food and drink service, swing out table tops and TONS of legroom, with an armrest that flips up for romantic kanoodling, I dare say they are on the money!

Ticket prices for such luxury are ten dollars more than the regular ticket price, but in my estimation, that is an equitable charge for such opulence. Seats are reserved for each person at the time of purchase, so one can specify the seat they want at the time of their purchase, or they can see a better seat and ask the concierge to change to a better location. Honestly though, the seating layout would preclude unsatisfied customers. I found a seat on the aisle to test the field of vision, and it was perfectly fine. I could see the screen in its entirety, and I couldn't see the seats in front of me. Perfectly cozy, I must say. I'll be back to enjoy a film in that space, or one of those spaces, rather, but that was not where we were to enjoy the evening's entertainment.

Back up the hallway, back into MacGuffins we went, to check out the Fork and Screen theaters, whose entrance is on the other side of the bar.

The Fork and screen is different from the Cinema Suites in that some of the opulence is stripped away to accommodate more seating, and the ticket prices are exactly the same as the rest of the theaters in the multiplex. You still get food service (all you gotta do is push the button and they come running. Their system is quite good, and needs no improvement). You get very comfortable seating and a place to set your food and drink. It is a little awkward because the table you dine on is across the walking path, so I had to lean forward on the edge of my seat to reach my meal, which with knowing in the other theater I could have just swung the table to me, kind of sucked. I wouldn't know how to fix that though. Seems to me the best solution for an unusual problem, but if I think of anything, like a swing up desk top that is easily stowed like they had when I was in college (which I know isn't perfect either), I'll let them know.

At that point we were encouraged to sit back and enjoy the experience. Well, the first thing that happened, before I could even push the button, was one of the wait staff popped up and took my drink order. I got a Cherry Coke. I was still irked about the beer prices. It's really easy to get your food and drinks before the movie starts so your wait staff won't interrupt you unless you call. My wait person was totally on the ball all night. Well trained, charming, and easy to communicate with in a darkened room where people are sensitive about interruption. For my dinner, I ordered the fish and chips, with an appetizer of those house prepared potato chips. The fish batter was made with Boulevard pale ale. If you've made a beer batter you know that it is tricky business to cook the batter all the way through as the carbon dioxide is released from the beer. It tends to thicken the batter and make it spongy on the inside, which is an unpleasant texture with the flakiness of the fish and crispiness of the outer batter. That is not the desired effect.  A few bubbles are ok, but alas, my fish had that spongy texture, and the batter was undercooked. It wasn't enough of an offense to send back, but I note it here because it cost eleven dollars, and cooking fish isn't difficult. It was served with tartar sauce, which was not to my liking, I asked for the promised malt vinegar, and the accompanying sweet and spicy jalapeño tomatillo relish was nowhere to be found. Well, I couldn't find it in the dark anyway.

The fries that came with the fish were terrific. However, it is my sincere hope that the chef at AMC abandons the house prepared smoky ketchup. That just didn't work at all for me. Sounded great, but after a couple samples of it I just couldn't have any more. It also got me thinking, how does one "smoke" ketchup without just adding liquid smoke? No idea.

There weren't interruptions save the ones I caused, and that is truly remarkable. Honestly I can't remember if anyone else besides Justin ordered anything at all. That's how unobtrusive the staff is.

All in all, it was great. I really enjoyed the experience, and I'll be back to check out the Cinema Suites, as well as the Fork and Screen. It's an experience that can still be enjoyed if one is on the kind of budget I'm on. But if they add items like fried brie, or perhaps a kabob dish, or spring rolls, or a whole section of healthy, not fried items one can eat in the dark, and if they have an affordable drink special, I could be swayed to splurge a little. I do wonder how the populous at large is going to take to this theater, given the state of our economy. I hope they do, like ducks to delicious water. I would if it were within my regular means.

Next time I go, here's what I'll do:

First, I'll budget for it.

Second, I'll bring my gal.

Third, we'll eat first. Wherever.

Fourth, we'll make out a lot during the movie if we can get away with it.

As for horror club, I think a very special engagement could be arranged, but with plenty of notice so people can save for it. It won't be an easy thing, but if it's worth doing, it's worth doing right.

I strongly recommend you check it out. Give them a chance. It really is a really cool place, and deserves your patronage.

Your Severed Right Hand,

Curtis

Currently listening:
That Thing You Do!: Original Motion Picture Soundtrack
By Various Artists
Release date: 1996-09-24