Hi there. You've seen geek code. But this isn't it. Geeks are their own special brand of weird, as are nerds. Dorks are a whole other breed. Perhaps you've been called a geek, but in your mind you said "No! I have a life! I can't be a geek!" You're quite right. But you can be a dork. There's nothing wrong with it...We all have our moments. But then some of us live that life to the fullest. Not usually on purpose.
That's actally the hallmark of dorkiness. Noone tries to be a dork, it just kind of happens that way. Ever find yourself saying "I didn't mean for that to happen...It just kind of went wrong all by itself!"? Do you feel that way so often that you sometimes thing you should have that tattooed on your forehead? Take this quiz to figure out your Dork Quotient...
1. Are you slow at getting jokes?
a) Nah, I usually get 'em right away.
b) Most of the time. Noone will explain them to me anymore.
c) Actually, I don't think most jokes are very funny.
2. When you do get them, do you laugh strangely?
a) No.
b) Yeah.
c) I don't laugh.
3. Have you ever tripped over a smooth sidewalk?
a) Once or twice.
b) If I'm not paying attention.
c) No. I never look up from the sidewalk.
4. ...While you were making eye contact with someone attractive?
a) No, I try not to be a dumbass.
b) Rather often, actually.
c) Eye contact?
5. What do your friends think of you?
a) That I'm a pretty cool person.
b) That I'm weird, but in a good way.
c) Friends?
6. Does your clothing match right now?
a) Of course.
b) Kind of.
c) My computer doesn't care, so why should I?
7. Do you go out on Friday and Saturday nights?
a) Almost always.
b) Sometimes.
c) No, the library closes at 5.
8. Can you do dialogue along with the Holy Grail?
a) The what?
b) Can and do.
c) I don't watch movies.
9. Who do you most closely identify with?
a) Kermit.
b) Gonzo.
c) Scooter.
10. How do you react if someone refers to you as 'strange'?
a) I'm a little insulted.
b) I take it as a compliment.
c) I ignore them and resume work.
11. Do you have a web page?
a) No.
b) Yes.
c) No, I have real work to do.
12. How do you react when you meet somebody's kids?
a) I pat them on the head and say hi.
b) We'll usually engage in an ugly-face contest.
c) I avoid children.
Do you have mostly A's?
You're NORMAL.
If you answered mostly A's, you're probably the average Joe/Jane Schmo on the street. You tend to not attract too much attention to yourself by doing stupid stuff in front of other people. You're the kind of person who considers their actions before they happen, and you are a pretty good judge of what other people are thinking. In short, you're dull.
So why did you take this quiz if you already knew you were normal? Well, either you're a delusional nerd, or you have a persistent little fear that you'll someday be perceived as a dork. Reality check: we all do dumb stuff from time to time, so don't worry about it so much. Bizarre spontaneity is better than regimented normalness. It's kind of endearing.
Do you have mostly B's?
You're an Official DORK
Ding ding ding! We have a winner! You're a dork. You knew that. You know a lot of random stuff actually...You probably know what a male duck is called, and no, it's not a duck. I bet you tell "I'm a big dork" stories on a fairly regular basis. You're a member of Alpha Beta Needa Data. But what makes you cool (in your own sort of way) anyway is that you take all of this with a sense of humor. You know full well there's nothing wrong with being a little strange; you wouldn't have it any other way. That's pretty respectable. Even if your socks don't really match, if you look at 'em up close. But who's going to be looking that close at your socks anyway, right? So take pride in your dorkiness. You rock.
Do you have mostly C's?
You're a NERDWhen you go the beach, do people kick sand in your face? Do small children? When was the last time you looked up from your computer? Are you sure the outside world's still there? Do you care? Of course not, you're a nerd. You're definitely not normal, but you go beyond mere dorkiness, to the land of the geeks. You live in your very own little world, which is fine by you I'm sure, but believe it or not, other people are not the enemy, and they might even like you if you gave them a chance. You may want to work on that sense-of-humor thing, though. Laughter is OK, as is an occasional A-. But whatever. Do what you like; you'll be making quadruple my salary in a couple of years anyway!