Douchebag Thinks He Is Manny Ramirez

So, Shorty surprised me today and we ended up going to see the Dodgers play the Giants at Dodger's Stadium.

I was really excited, this was my first time going to the stadium and I wanted to eat one of those famous Dodger Dogs.

In preparation for this magical event I had to train my stomach.

Breakfast was bagels, lox and cream cheese.

Lunch was two chicken drumsticks, potatoes and soup.

Snack was a bag of peanuts and a diet coke.

Finally, that moment appeared.

It was around the 3rd inning and I left the best seats ever to go and get a Dodger dog.

I stood in line for 10 minutes and went for something called a "super" Dodger dog.

It was all beef so I could actually eat it.

It was amazing.

Then I settled in to watch the game.

As a Yankee fan, it's hard for me to say this, but Manny Ramirez in the real deal.

Two home runs tonight.

Just an amazing hitter.

But, what was funny was that the crowd in LA is Manny crazy.

They sell these STUPID dread lock wigs and everyone is wearing them.

Even this douchebag.

What?

So I found this great site sarahpalinsvagina.com and am obessed with it !

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MmJbn3kWfUA

FatJewishGuy.com presents: Shaq Rap: Kobe Tell Them How My Ass Tastes spoof. This video is hilarious. Here is the Fat Jewish Guy version of the famous Shaquille Oneil Rap.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vsMwFSpmx5k

Kira from ObamasChocolateNuts.com has a message for Hillary Clinton now that the primaries are over. Join Kira to get Obama's Chocolate Nuts in Your Mouth.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lykNio7EVHM

Stand up comedian and lover David Feingold aka fat jewish guy is featured on channel 8 San Diego news about his website sdsu08.com.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0vnbPsdml3I

Fat Jewish Guy has his first installment of Cooking with Fat Jewish Guy. In this episode he bakes and decorates Barack Obama Cupcakes. Check it out only on fatjewishguy.com

DJ Cassidy Hot Jewish Girls Obama T Shirts
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Once again, I got another message on my phone.

I tried calling back the number, but all I got was a sexy voice with a voice mail.

Left a message and told her to call me.

I am thinking it's a prank, but who knows?

I had bigger things to worry about.

Since I stopped drinking my liquid candy concoction, I have a sweet tooth.

I tried everything.

Snickers, Twix, Jelly beans, Kit Kat, nothing works.

I tried 4 sweet and lows in my coffee.

Not the same.

So, I went to 7-11 and got a small.

I know it's bad for me, but I had to do it.

Maybe, I drank like 200 calories worth of chocolate.

The only problem is that I ate like 1000 calories worth of chocolate before I broke down.

So, I would have been better off drinking my liquid candy in the first place.

Them after I got the image of the HOT chick out of my head, (I think she is Jewish) I remembered that I had interviewed a skinny Jewish guy by the name of DJ Cassidy.

I didn't know much about him, but when I looked him up, I saw that he spins beats for Puff, J-Lo and other celebs that have one name.

So, I figure I will air the interview right now.



Then, as I took off my Obama Shirt I realized that we are about to witness history.

Black, woman or just plain old.

Some minority is going to win this election.

FatJewishGuy.com

Giants Super Bowl Shirts

I spent all day looking at Giants SuperBowl Shirts.

I mean Giants Super Bowl Shirts.

Sorry, typo.

But anyway as I was busy doing things, I get a phone call.

Not recognizing the phone number, I put down my coffee (no more liquid candy) and answer.

It was none other then Alison from The Millionaire Matchmaker.

If you don't remember who that is, trust me she is HOT and you can see her video here

But anyway, I tried to sound charming as I listened to what she had to say.

Yes, Allison, I love the show.

Sure, Allison,  I would love to go to coffee.

But then she hit me with it.

"Um, David...my name is Alison with one L. Not 2"

Honey...have you read my website?

There are typos everywhere.

I can't even spell teh word the.

I put up a shirt last night and instead of believe I wrote belive.

But anyway, I promised her I would set the record straight.

Alison has one L.

Unless you are like every other Allison out there.

Then you have 2.

But not this one.

I hung up and resumed drinking my coffee.

I really miss my liquid concoction.

But, I was trying to be healthy.

So, I went home and ate a pound of Tri Tips. (steak)

Oh yeah, I also had a Toffee Cake at Starbucks.

As you feel sorry for me, or are just disgusted by my eating habits, enjoy this video with Penthouse Pet Jaime Hammer, Vivid Girl and Penthouse Pet Brea Lynn and me...Fat Jewish Guy

Brady Quinn Loves Fat Jewish Guy
So, I found out that my liquid candy concoction is an extra 1800 calories a day.

I guess I am not drinking that anymore.

1800 calories.

Wow.

I decided to offset that sweet sweet elixir by eating healthy for the Super Bowl.

Turkey breast and salad.

Also a few potatoes.

I did good.

Then came the chicken fingers and the frozen yogurt.

Then I needed one more dose of liquid candy before I quit.

So maybe it wasn't that good.

It could have been worse though.

Congrats New York Giants.

Check out these phat Giants Super Bowl Shirts giantssuperbowlshirts.com

They have some cool designs.

But enough shilling.

In honor of the Super Bowl, enjoy my interview with Brady Quinn.

Hawaiian Tropic Zone Girls Feed Me.

No, you haven't seen this video.

In the spirit of shabbat, I decided to treat you guys to a new one.

I have so much footage of half naked chicks feeding me that I feel like I need to share.

But first.

Finally, after weeks and weeks of neglecting shul, I decided to go tonight.

It's good for the soul.

It's also apparently good for the belly.

so get this.

Challah, Hummus, Olive Spread, pasta salad, Salad, Chinese salad, soup, chicken, rice, carrot kugul, mousse and a cup of tea was what I ate tonight.

Wait.

I had string cheese on my way there.

So, full.

However, I had to stop at 7-11 to get my fix.

Yup.

Liquid candy.

I am psyched.

Shabbat Shalom.

Enjoy the girls!