¥ILL Vixen¥'s Blogs

I'm sorry but then again I am not....i have responsibilities of a mother and wife that i can't party with people all the time
I'm sorry but then again I am not....having a one track mind and all i care about is one thing and you know what i mean
I'm sorry but then again I am not....for looking at the big picture in life and would rather spend the rest of my life making a difference in people's lives a positive difference at that.
I'm sorry but then again I am not....that the only time you want to spend anytime with me is when noone at the moment is available when you want them too be.
I'm sorry but then again I am not....that when i am here for everyone in this fucking planet that they can't be there for me when i need it and that is rare but still i deserve to have someone be there for me once in awhile.
I'm sorry but then again I am not....that my brutal honesty doesn't seep into those who have a totally different and wrong sense of reality to see the truth instead of making up their own for personal gain.
I'm sorry but then again I am not....that a certain person in my life isnt and keeps wanting to lie to me i am tired of the chess game either finish me or be on my side.
I'm sorry but then again I am not....
I'm sorry but then again I am not....
I'm sorry but then again I am not....
I'm sorry but then again I am not....
I'm sorry but then again I am not....

Ok so I have or should i say had this one friend who talked mad shit about my profile pics being slutty and shit pretty much making me out to be a whore and such. She told one of my best friends thus my best friend telling me.  I swear to BJ* that I won't confront or say anything to Kay*about her talking behind my back but damn this bitch talks behind my back pretending to be all cool with me and shit and I just want to fucking tell her off but I swore to BJ* secrecy.  This is eating me up.  What do you think I should do?  Break the promise I made to BJ* and just reak havoc on Kay*? Or, just try my best to grin and bare it?

*=Name changed

I got up to take the boys to school then took my daily trip to starbucks which i really enjoy because I am a starbucks fan all the way baby.  After that I came home laid in bed for a few so i can watch my Charmed episodes. It was rather chilly this morning so i took a nice hot bath/shower to get all refreshed to really get my day started.  Around 11AM i went to the school to meet up with my son Travis to have lunch with him hahaha now i see why he always wants a snack when he comes home from school he hates the school lunches not that i blame him today because i ate the same thing the other kids did and boy do i have heartburn Tums is so calling my name.  After lunch i went to Travis' class so I can help his teacher with a couple of students who have a hard time with reading.  I really enjoyed helping the other students makes me wish i would have become a teacher but i guess it just wasn't my calling but in hind sight i had a blast.  In leaving the school after my duty was done Mrs. Jones one of the teachers that works with my other son Taylor stopped me and told me that Taylor is improving beautifully and I am so proud of him.  This year he had been having behavioural and listening problems which was getting him into trouble.  But according to Mrs. Jones that is nearly becoming a thing of the past which gives me great joy.  The rest of my day well that has yet to be determined LOL after all it is 1:37 pm and I have a ways to go before the boys go to bed and mommy can have chill out time again.  I really do enjoy being a mother and wouldn't trade it for the world. I love my boys with everything that I am they are definitely a gift to me and to the world. Tomorrow I am going to have lunch with Taylor since i love to eat lunch with travis one day and then taylor the next vice versa.  I guess it shows i really miss my boys when they aren't around and having lunch with them gives me a bit of satisfaction and time to spend with them.  If i could afford it i would have lunch with them all the time.  hmmm maybe when I do gain extra money i can do that but for now i will just go twice a month to have lunch with my boys.  Also tomorrow after I have lunch with Taylor my friend Jan who i usually sit in her car and wait for the kids to get out are going to starbucks yeah i am going to chrisen her into the life of starbucksism lol that oughta be fun.  Ok well i have spewed enough for now take it easy everyone and remember....


Children are the joys of the present, the dreams of our past, and the key to our future

male ejaculation

Up until two days ago -- I say this tongue-in-cheek -- I was convinced that I was God's gift to women. I could literally have sex for hours without ejaculating and thought I had some rare gift that few men possessed. However, my girlfriend didn't feel the same way, and it finally began to frustrate me as well, so I did some checking and it turns out I suffer from retarded ejaculation -- kinda takes the wind out of your sails.

Anyway, the information I've read in your column pretty much coincides with what I've read elsewhere: that the problem could be physical or psychological. The thing is, I don't take any drugs, I drink maybe once every four months, I'm young and in good health, and I really don't feel as if I have any psychological problems.

However, I do masturbate frequently, to the tune of at least once a day, and I am always able to bring myself to climax. Someone told me that if I quit masturbating, my penis will become more sensitive and I would more easily be able to ejaculate during intercourse. Is there any truth to this? I am an avid reader of AskMen.com and consider you guys to be the bible on many issues. So if you could give me your input on this very simple (and cheap) cure, it would be greatly appreciated.

Steve

As you seem quite certain that you have no physical or psychological problems, and do not have any issues with drugs or alcohol, your difficulty reaching climax during intercourse could be due to the fact that your penis has grown accustomed to the feel of your hand, which differs greatly from the feel of a vagina.

Try masturbating less frequently and using a minimal amount of pressure when you do, which will serve to increase the sensitivity in your penis, so that when you do have sex, you'll be able to experience the sensations to their fullest, which will hopefully allow you to orgasm during intercourse.

Donald Zimmer

Possession

Listen as the wind blows from across the great divide
voices trapped in yearning, memories trapped in time
the night is my companion, and solitude my guide
would I spend forever here and not be satisfied?
and I would be the one
to hold you down
kiss you so hard
I'll take your breath away
and after, I'd wipe away the tears
just close your eyes dear
Through this world I've stumbled
so many times betrayed
trying to find an honest word to find
the truth enslaved
oh you speak to me in riddles
and you speak to me in rhymes
my body aches to breathe your breath
your words keep me alive
And I would be the one
to hold you down
kiss you so hard
I'll take your breath away
and after, I'd wipe away the tears
just close your eyes dear
Into this night I wander
it's morning that I dread
another day of knowing of
the path I fear to tread
oh into the sea of waking dreams
I follow without pride
nothing stands between us here
and I won't be denied
and I would be the one
to hold you down
kiss you so hard
I'll take your breath away
and after, I'd wipe away the tears
just close your eyes...

turn out the light
just say goodnight, to yourself
may I remind you
when you find you, you're all alone is when you've got to be strong
cause that's when they call you, in the night
he's got your picture in his mind
he's got your number on a paper at his disposal anytime

is it really true
could you save yourself for someone who, loves you for you
so many times we just give it away, to someone who
someone who you
met in bar
the back of a car
and for a moment you felt important but not in your heart
my self esteem, it's been low, go ahead and count it's been lower than low
i know the feeling of it stealing life out from under me
i want to learn, how you save yourself for someone who, loves you for you
so many times we just give it away to someone who, couldn't even remember your name
could you save yourself for someone who, loves you for you, loves me for me
give it away to someone who someone who will cherish your name

cause I want to learn, can you save yourself for
someone who , loves you for you,
loves me for me
give it away to someone who, someone who will
cherish your name
cherish your name

thank you sis for providing this for me

I'm holding on your rope,
Got me ten feet off the ground
And I'm hearing what you say but I just can't make a sound
You tell me that you need me
Then you go and cut me down, but wait
You tell me that you're sorry
Didn't think I'd turn around, and say...

That it's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

I'd take another chance, take a fall
Take a shot for you
And I need you like a heart needs a beat
But it's nothing new - yeah yeah
[Apologize lyrics on http://www.metrolyrics.com]

I loved you with the fire red-
Now it's turning blue, and you say...
"Sorry" like the angel heaven let me think was you
But I'm afraid...

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late whoa.....

Bridge (guitar/piano)

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, yeah-
I said it's too late to apologize, yeah-
I'm holding on your rope, got me ten feet off...

A Perfect Circle - Orestes Lyrics

Metaphor for a missing moment
Pull me into your perfect circle

One womb
One shape
One resolve

Liberate this will
To release us all

Gotta cut away, clear away
Snip away and sever this
Umbilical residue that's
Keeping me from killing you

And from pulling you down with me in here
I can almost hear you scream

Give me
One more medicated peaceful moment
One more medicated peaceful moment

And I don't wanna feel this overwhelming
Hostility
Because I don't wanna feel this overwhelming
Hostility

Gotta cut away Clear away
Snip away and sever this
Umbilical residue
Gotta cut away Clear away
Snip away and sever this
Umbilical residue that's
Keeping me from killing you
Keeping me from killing you

1.

Never take anything for granted...Cause you really dont know what you had til it's gone!



2.

If You have assumed a character beyond your own strength you have played both a poor figure in that and neglected one with in your powers.



3.

People look at me and laugh cause I'm different. I look at them and laugh cause they are all the same.



4.

If you would pursue philosophy, your first task is to throw away conciet. For you cant begin to learn what you have conceit that u already know.



5.

If you seek truth you do not seek to gain victory by every possible means : but once you have found truth , You need not fear of being defeated.



6.

What foolish talk is this? How can I any longer lay claim to right principles, if I am not content with what I am? but I am all a flutter about what I am suppose to be.



7.

Recognize, Kindred to the gods

And thier bondage in these chains of the body and its manifold necessities, Should desire to cast them off as burdens too grievous to be born, and depart to their true instinct. This is the struggle in which your master and teacher were he worthy of the name, and should be engaged. You would come to me and say: We can no longer endure being chained to this wretched body, giving it food and drink and rest Aye and for its sake force to be subservient Are these things indifferent and nothing to us?. Let us be freed from these chains that confine us and press us down. Here are thieves and robbers and tyrants, those who deem they have a power over us... Because of this miserable body and what appertains to it. Let it show they have power over none.



8.

Asked what common sense was I replied

As that may be called a common ear which distinguished only sounds, while that which distinguishes between musical notes is not common but produced by training: so there are certain things which men not entirely perverted see by the natural principles common to all. Such a constitution of the mind is called common sense.



9.

The beginning of philosophy is to know the condition of ones own mind and If a man recognizes that this is a weakly state he will want to apply it to his greatest questions and at the best moments. As it is men who arent ready for even a morsel, yet still try to consume and devour entire treaties, Accordingly he becomes sick and has indigestion, Where as he should of stepped by back and stopped to consider his capacity.



10.

Thou art but a poor laden soul with a lifeless body, A puppet to the powers that be.



11.

Lose no time setting before you

a certain stamp of character and behavior

to use in company of others.

Let silence be your general rule,

or say only what is necessary

and in few words.

But on occasions should you enter

into discourse sparingly,

Avoiding such common topics

as athletes, or horse races..

(Avoid speaking in ways of praise or blame.)

If you can, win over the conversation

of your company to what it should be

by your own.

But if you should find yourself

cut off without escape

among strangers and aliens.........Be silent.

12.

Laughter should not be much,

Nor frequent, nor unrestrained.

13.

One man finds pleasure in improving his land, another his horses...

I myself find pleasure in seeing I grow better

Day by day.

14.

When a youth was giving himself airs

In the theater...saying..

"I am wise for I have conversed

With many noble men".

.I replied "I to have conversed

Wth many a rich man..

Yet I am not rich."

15.

Feeling----Virtue-----Vice

Fear, Courage, Cowardice

Love of danger, Discretion, Rashness

Hoarding instinct, Liberality, Meanness

Spending instinct, Thrift, Prodigality



16.

A moment of realization...

Is worth a thousand prayers.

17.

The husbandman deals with his land

Physicians and trainers with the body

and a Wiseman?

With his own mind

18.

No man can rob us of our will -

No man can lord over that

19.

Reflect that the source of all evils to men,

Of Baseness and cowardice...

And is not death but the fear of it..(metaphorical)

20.

Keep death and exile daily before thine eyes, With all else that men deem terrible,

But more especially death.

Then thou wilt never think a mean thought,

Nor covet anything beyond measure.

(Stay humble)



21.

If you are told that

And one such speaks ill of you,

Make no defense against what was said,

But answer, He surely knew not

Of my other faults, else he would not

Have mentioned these only.



22.

Remember this...

What you give to the body

You will come to lose,

But what you feed your soul

You keep forever.



23.

Asked.."Who is a rich man?"...

Reply "One who is content."



24.

All things are changing:

And thyself art in continuous mutation

And in a manner of continuous destruction, Along with all around you (Universe too)



25.

"Sex is like math

First you add the bed

Then subtract the clothes

Then you divide the legs

But you never want to multiply"



26.

My point is strong,

Confidence is in my original nature.



27.

If you are TRYING to attain enlightenment,

You are creating and being driven by karma

And wasting your time on your black cushion... Shunryu


28.

Give thyself more diligently to reflection..............

Know Thyself!!



29.
People who are insecure tend to receive compliments and all the love in the world people who are secure and hold a sence of power and idealism tend to be talked about and put down to relieve their sence of leadership and independence, people of perfection are constantly watched for imperfections..it's a far more superior aspect to be strong, beauty is strength,I have not one insecurity and this is why I'm beautiful

30.I would rather be hated for who I am , than loved for what I am not

31."Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." ~Dr. Seuss

32."What we have done for ourselves alone dies with us; what we have done for others and the world remains and is immortal."

33.This is what you shall do:
Love the earth and sun and the animals, despise riches,
give alms to everyone that asks, stand up for the stupid
and crazy, devote your income and labor to others,
hate tyrants, argue not concerning God, have
patience and indulgence toward the people, take off
your hat to nothing known or unknown or to any man or
number of men, go freely with powerful uneducated persons and with the young and with the mothers of families, read these leaves in the open air every season of every year of your life, re-examine all you have been told at school or church or in any book, dismiss whatever insults your own soul, and your very flesh shall be a great poem and have the richest fluency not only in
its words but in the silent lines of its lips and face and
between the lashes of your eyes and in every motion and
joint of your body...
- Walt Whitman

Sade - No Ordinary Love Lyrics

I gave you all the love I got
I gave you more than I could give
I gave you love
I gave you all that I have inside
And you took my love
You took my love
Didn't I tell you
What I believe
Did somebody say that
A love like that won't last
Didn't I give you
All that I've got to give baby

I gave you all the love I got
I gave you more than I could give
I gave you love
I gave you all that I have inside
And you took my love
You took my love

I keep crying
I keep trying for you
There's nothing like you and I baby

This is no ordinary love
No ordinary Love
This is no ordinary love
No ordinary Love

When you came my way
You brightened every day
With your sweet smile

Didn't I tell you
What I believe
Did somebody say that
A love like that won't last
Didn't I give you
All that I've got to give baby

This is no ordinary love
No ordinary Love
This is no ordinary love
No ordinary Love

I keep crying
I keep trying for you
There's nothing like you and I baby

This is no ordinary love
No ordinary Love
This is no ordinary love
No ordinary Love

Keep trying for you
Keep crying for you
Keep flying for you
Keep flying I'm falling

I'm falling

Keep trying for you
Keep crying for you
Keep flying for you
Keep flying for you I'm falling
I'm falling

Audrey Hepburn((May 4, 1929 – January 20, 1993) is my favourite classic movie actress for many reasons.
1) Ms. Hepburn had such style such grace about herself.
2) Ms. Hepburn did many things to help people around the world , very compassionate.
3) Ms. Hepburn never starred in a movie that she would consider objectionable to her God and that is a beautiful thing in itself.
4) Ms. Hepburn was a very beautiful woman she is everything i ever dreamed of being.

In my opinion she should have been canonized a saint for just being herself and doing what she felt was right not just for herself but the whole world around her.  I have the Mattel Barbie Eliza Doolittle at the Embassy Ball collectors addition shown here:


And here is the real Ms. Eliza Doolittle at the Embassy Ball in My Fair Lady:


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Audrey_Hepburn

for more information about her please go to the url above.

More Photos of Ms. Audrey Hepburn here:


(Ms. Hepburn @ age 59)

For being here for me through a hard time in which i dont deserve to go through I did nothing wrong.  I want to thank the following people:

Shayne-you are keeping me strong and supporting judgement day is coming. Will we ever get our true happiness?? hahaha a long shot huh

Serena-for 12 years nearly you have seen the hell i have been through and never once left my side no matter how distant i may have gotten at times. I do appreciate you and will see you at the cross roads if i dont see you before then.

James- you always manage to put things into perspective for me.  I am sure dealing with my issues these past two weeks nearly. Have been trying considering circumstances but i appreciate you being here for me.

Ryan-crazy how we reunited eh?  You have always been the type to make people see both sides of the coin and give others the benefit of the doubt. You are awesome.

Mary- I want to thank you for baring with me with the repetitive talk about Chaos.  You have a true gift there and don't lose that.

Sade - Smooth Operator Lyrics

He's laughing with another girl
And playing with another heart
Placing high stakes, making hearts ache
He's loved in seven languages
Jewel box life diamond nights and ruby lights, high in the sky
Heaven help him, when he falls
Diamond life, lover boy
He move in space with minimum waste and maximum joy
City lights and business nights
When you require streetcar desire for higher heights

No place for beginners or sensitive hearts
When sentiment is left to chance
No place to be ending but somewhere to start

No need to ask
He's a smooth operator
Smooth operator, smooth operator
Smooth operator

Coast to coast, LA to Chicago, western male
Across the north and south, to Key Largo, love for sale

Face to face, each classic case
We shadow box and double cross
Yet need the chase

A license to love, insurance to hold
Melts all your memories and change into gold
His eyes are like angels but his heart is cold

No need to ask
He's a smooth operator
Smooth operator, smooth operator
Smooth operator

Coast to coast, LA to Chicago, western male
Across the north and south, to Key Largo, love for sale

Smooth operator, smooth operator
Smooth operator, smooth operator
Smooth operator, smooth operator
Smooth operator, smooth operator
Smooth operator, smooth operator