My Bucket List....

     I know that it has been way more than a year since my last blog here on MySpace.  So I thought that it was time to post a new blog.  This is part one of two parts.

     Ok, now let me start with what I am not:  I'm fucking sick and damn tired of fucking no-life-having losers calling me gay, a douchebag, racist, freaky, creepy, and saying that I'm an idiot that is a puppet of Johnny Fratto, the JFSC.TV, the Bunny Ranch, and others.  Look losers, I'm my own person.  I'm not a puppet of anyone.  No one is pulling my strings or putting their hands up my ass to get me to say or do what they want me to do.  I have a mind of my own, you fuckers, and I do and say what I want to do and say, not what others want me to do.  I mean, get a fucking clue you brain-dead asswipes.  If I really was the type of person that was a puppet for people, I would have done every little thing Howard has put in front of me without a fight.  Since I haven't done any of that shit, that really should prove to all of you, no matter if you have a 0.0 IQ or the world's highest IQ, that I'm not a fucking puppet for anyone, no matter who they are or for what they are offering me.  The plugs that I give on air for the Bunny Ranch, any of Johnny's businesses, or any JFSC.TV, are plugs that I give all on my own accord.  Despite what you fuckers may think of me, I'm not a person that has an all-about-me attitude.  I do favors for my friends without having to be asked. 

     Let me move to the next thing that I am not:  That is... I am 100% not gay.  Just the thought of doing anything sexual with another man makes me kind of sick to my stomach.  Females, only females, make me horny and hard.  I have never had a sexual fantasy about a guy, nor do I ever want to have one.  All the porn I look at only involves females, busty females mainly.  Maybe all of you losers are calling me gay because you all have some hidden in the closet fantasies about being with gay midgets, or rather, gay little people.  Here, let me help you with your fantasies with two suggestions: www.craigslist.com, (which is Benjy's favorite place to find someone to get laid with); or maybe you can google "single male gay midgets."  I'm giving you this suggestion since I myself am not gay or for that matter, a midget.  There is only one thing I have in common with Ross The Intern, and that is that I went down on three of the Bunny Ranch and Love Ranch babes. But unlike him, I completely enjoyed it.  I 100% know without a doubt that I'm only into women. 

    Speaking of the Bunny Ranch and the Love Ranch, there is still a nice long list of hot babes at the two ranches that I haven't partied with yet and want to party with on my up coming visits.  From BR-1 in no order:  Sunny Lane, Willow Love, Paris M., Bentley Jo., Logan L., Brittany Angel, Anna Suvari, Alexis Fire, Bunny Love, Brenna Bovary, Chey Stone, Jodi Bean, Felicia Foxxx, Sydnee Michaels.
    From BR-2 in no order:  Luscious Laya, Charisma Love, Chyann Sky, Kalli Morgan, Jimi Lynn, Jordan S., Crystal, Bailey Jean, Gillian Sloan, Taylor Lee, Pepper Mint, Misty Massage, Miss Isis, Ashlee Cox, and many more. 
    Plus here's who I want to party with again in no order:  Hailey Madison, Chloe Daniels, Cherry Pie, Air Force Amy. 

    One last thing before I end this part of telling you all something that I am not, let me address one of the fucking worthless ass loser pricks calling me gay on the most worthless site on the internet: Shitty Fan Network.  That person is Perkoff.  Here's his worthless SFN post:  "What a phoney. The guy won't take an acting job playing a gay character but he'll become friends with Ross The Gay Intern.  I think Eric The Midget is one of them in the closet homos who denies he's homo hardcore because his mother and father have made him think he has to be ashamed of liking boys.  Hey Eric, you just exposed yourself today in that phone call with Ross The Gay Intern.  You could tell by the tone of your voice that you were falling in love with the gay.  Hey you Dumb-fuck that looks like a reject from The Village People.  Oh yeah think I found your wacko pirate looking father on Stickam he does a show dressed as a pirate like you look in your on-line display photos.  Check him out Saturday nights.  I'm sure he'd like to see his long lost asshole pathetic loser son."  Listen, you fucking prick, I didn't expose shit about myself the other morning on the show while Ross The Intern was there.  I wasn't even calling to talk to him, you loser.  I knew while he was there that Jay Leno would be talked about so I called to talk to Howard about how Jay and his writers stole a joke from another person.  Maybe you making this post, plus how you look like Capt. Jack's even gayer looking brother in your on-line photo, means that you are really the one hiding the fact that you are gay, and you are just trying to deflect it on to me.  Shame on you.  Just come out of the closet and go make out with High Pitch.

     Also, while all or most of you were listening to the Howard Stern Show this morning (Monday morning), I was fast asleep having great hot steamy sexual dream about the super hot, super sexy porn star Sunny Lane.  I was eating her out and fingering her and she was enjoying it.  Does that sound like a dream a gay guy would have?  I really don't fucking think so.

     Ok, the next thing that I am not.  I am not at all racist.  I don't have one fucking problem with anyone of any race at all.  I never have, and I know that I never will.  In fact, you pricks, the person helping me to edit this blog and most everything else I write is a beautiful Asian woman named Courtney who is half Japanese and half Chinese.  So how is that racist?  If I was racist I wouldn't even talk to Courtney, let alone be close friends with her and have her help me edit what I write.  Also, take a look at that list above of Bunny Ranch babes. One is an Asian and the other is an African American.  So calling me racist is more retarded than Gary and Wendy put together.  Come to think of it, I think that it was Perkoff the huge Jerkoff that called me racist in a SFN topic lately.  Until they make Stupidity a race, I'm not racist.  

     Ok next, I am not a freak or creepy in any way, shape, or form.  Besides being a "LITTLE PERSON!!!" and not a midget in a wheelchair, I am as normal as any other person.  Maybe all of you need to take a fucking look in a mirror.  Maybe all of you are the creepy freaks out there.  "Midget," "freak," and "creepy" all need to be taken the fuck out of peoples vocabulary when they talk about little people and people with disabilities.  Not one little person or disabled person chose to be that way.  Look assholes, none of us little people and people with disabilities ask to be the way we are.  It shows how pathetic and worthless you are as a person to sit around wasting your time making fun of people like me.  The only freaky and creepy people in this world are the people that choose to overly tattoo or pierce themselves, or dress in either goth, grunge, or punk rock styles.  Those are freaky people, not little people or people with disabilities.  As they say at the beginning of the reality show "Little People, Big World":  "I wish people would realize that Little People aren't any different than anyone else, they just have to do things in a different way." 

    The only creepy people in this world are people that commit sex crimes or other crimes against children, not little people or people with disabilities.  I know that god didn't put people like me down here for loser people like all of you to make fun of us and make us the butt of your jokes.  I also know that god didn't put any of you all down here to act like asses 24 hours a day 7 days a week, wasting your whole worthless lives being pathetic and making fun of others. 

     Next, let me tell you that I am not a liar at all or a douchebag.  I don't lie when I'm on air with Howard.  It's called acting, you dumb-ass fucking prick losers.  All of you know what acting is, right?  It's what that dumb-fuck Lonnie, if that's what his name really is, was doing badly last week when he called in to tell me off.  I really am not a douchebag at all.  You fucking ass idiots are so fucking stupid, you believe the shit Howard feeds to you about me.  Thank god he's not Jim Jones or he'd have all of you drinking his poisoned Kool Aid, offing yourselves.  Get a clue dumb-fucks, he makes me look like the bad guy or, in wrestling terms, "the heel" so you will hate me.  Start using what little brains you might have and think for yourselves for once. 

     Part Two to tell all of you losers what I am will be posted later today or tonight.