intrigued. tired. restless. waiting. curious.

I NEED SOME MONEY!!!!111111

i freakin lost my wallet or some pacos stole it.  more to come.

I have finally found a new apartment and will be moving in on the 23rd of July.  It will be with My brother, another friend of mine and me.  We will def. be throwing a lil welcoming party with mostly just good friends due to it being an apartment and I don't want to get yelled at within the first few weeks for noise complaints.

The place is in Santa Clara and I will hopefully get DSL installed ASAP or I might have to leech some WiFi.

I got a new laptop, Dell Inspiron 1150. Its a lil thick and heavy but for the price and condition it was a great deal. Now I am just sittin here watching a movie and making myself sterile.

So deep that it didn't even bleed and catch me Off guard, red handed Now I'm far from lonely Asleep I still see you lying next to me So deep that it didn't even bleed and catch me I.. I need something else Would someone please just give me Hit me, knock me out And let me go back to sleep I can laugh All I want inside I still am empty So deep that it didn't even bleed and catch me I... I'll be just fine Pretending I'm not I'm far from lonely And it's all that I've got I'll be just fine Pretending I'm not I'm far from lonely And it's all that I've got I guess, I remember every glance you shot me Un-harmed, I'm losing weight and some body heat I squoze so hard I stopped your heart from beating So deep that I didn't even scream fuck me, I.. I'll be just fine Pretending I'm not I'm far from lonely And it's all that I've got I'll be just fine Pretending I'm not I'm far from lonely And it's all that I've got And it's all that I've got Yeah, it's all that I've got It's all that I've got It's all that I've got It's all that I've got! So deep that it didn't even bleed and catch me So deep that I didn't even scream fuck me I'll be just fine Pretending I'm not I'm far from lonely And it's all that I've got I'll be just fine Pretending I'm not I'm far from lonely And it's all that I've got And it's all that I've got Yeah, it's all that I've got

This is to the woman who I loved but lost Intertwined souls of the universe Got divorced when it wasn't forced Cause single thoughts of being double-crossed Till there's no love lost I can't even start this She said forever.. This is the rewrite.. this is the rewrite Yo, check it out! This to the woman who I used to respect Now I call her a bitch cause I'm constantly upset So this is to the (bitch) who cut communication for a new relation Selfishness spread through the nation All I ever needed was a hug To wrap my loving arms around you, you blew it off with a shrug So all I ever wanted was a hand to hold I ain't the man to scold Your plan is cold but God damn its old It's about time get inside of my head while I'm out my mind As I scream cry yell shout and whine All I ever asked for Was an ear to hear me What you really have to wear a mask for? You straight shattered my glass jaw Now I'm picking up the pieces of my past that's what you last saw But see this, needless to say, you went astray And all people ever hear Paul say is I don't give a damn, for real, I don't care That's what I hear from myself tryin' to make things clear Yeah, I don't give a FUCK for real I don't FUCKING CARE That's all I hear.. The pain stops with the end of raindrops But this cloudy weather just reminds me of the time we spent together And how you left forever like that with a snap of fingers Pain lingers, so this is to the Woman who I made my family Now I call her a bitch just to save my sanity So this is to that (bitch) who I thought would be right here She's just a monster in my reoccurring nightmare Now when my grandfather died, you weren't there for me When my grandmama died, you weren't there for me When my natural dad died, you weren't there for me You saw me and just ignored me like "Sorry end of the story" My family's dropping like flies somehow I got to rise But nobody's by my side, can't look straight into my eyes Nobody's by my side, can't look straight into my eyes My fist grabs air, I stare into the lies I never felt more lonely, I made you the one and only Individual to know me. This is the thanks that you show me? I never felt more lonely, I made you the one and only Individual to know me, never thought that you'd turn phony But you did, now I'm going all out kid And I got mad hate to deal with Just ask Dibbs I'm having trouble letting anyone get close to me And that's a major problem because that's not the way it's supposed to be Supposedly, I should keep my composure Right now, I'm like "wow", it's time for me to seek closure Mental pictures are destroyed - overexposure Ever get that feeling that nobody really knows ya? This is to the woman who I called my best friend Now I call her bitch, because she made the switch to that (bitch) Who I shouldn't disrespect So now I call her woman just to keep myself in check This is the rewrite..

Long ago Just like the hearse you died to get in again We are so far from you. Burning on just like a match you strike to incinerate. The lives of everyone you know And what’s the worst you take, from every heart you break (heart you break) And like a blade you stain. Well I've been holding on tonight What’s the worst that I could say? Things are better if I stay So long and goodnight So long and goodnight

The taco to sausage ratio is pretty nice in my friends list. 12/10.

Ahh it was a lovely saturday and I did not have to work. Why did I have the day off? Well for the 2005 Miss Vietnam Pageant of course. Here are some pictures from the event... www.surveyaddict.com/vietpageant/default.htm

One of the strangest music videos I have ever seen. I will definitely have nightmares from this one. Video code provided by KEKAI BOY and btw what is up with the crotch shots....