I'm feeling overly philosophical and worthy of enlightenment tonight so hold on to your britches...Have you ever felt like the most alone person even though you are standing in a crowded room? Or have you ever stared at yourself in the mirror so hard and so intent on finding yourself that you make yourself dizzy? Or have you ever been in a traffic jam or stopped at a red light and thought...NO, tried to know what everyone in the other cars were thinking about at that moment in time? Like today, I was behind this silver coup with stickers on the back window that someone had tried to peel off...you know what I'm talking about...and the woman in the front passenger seat was wearing a fonky hat and she was talking to the person in the backseat when she started laughing hysterically. I wanted to know what was so damn funny! It wasnt that I was being nosy. I just wanted to understand at that very second what it would be like to be a lady with a fonky hat, laughing in a silver soup. Is that crazy? Then I looked over at the businessman in his brand new red truck. You know the type...successful by his own doing and aware that he had done good and made his momma proud just like Elvis. He wears his nice ironed Polo-shirts everyday and travels to all the cities he has under contract at that moment in time. People want to know him want to talk to him...they want TO BE him. But not so in the case of the woman with the fonky hat. Then, I noticed the black woman in my rearview mirror. She is driving a metallic blue Camry. She is just off of work...a 9 to 5 job that she has held for the past 15 years. She has helped to support her family so that her children can have a wonderful life even after they leave home. She is just like my mother...and possibly like the woman with the fonky hat. Then, Im whipped back to reality by the 21-year-old frat boy in his red jeep with the top down. It is a graduation present from Daddy because he has done so well in college (Tulane), has been accepted to law school AND medical school...decisions, decisions!! His name is something like Dylan or Tyler but the nickname on the back of his frat jersey reads something like Travolta or Virgin Slayer
My point is that so many differences exist in this world and everyday we walk around in our own stupid routine and we dont even notice what else is going on in this place. We dont recognize the lady in the fonky hat or the businessman, and God forbid we should MISS Virgin Slayer!! My next point is that we dont notice them because we have judged them within a split second of them entering our line of vision. Just as I obviously did in my car. Why does that have to be? Why cant people just be people and not be so taken aback by WHO they are? They really arent frightening if they would just be given a chance. So for a moment I made my routine stop so that I could recognize that it needed to stop because there is a whole world out there happening with or without me...much the same way when someone dies and the day after the funeral your driving around and you see a lady in a fonky hat in a silver coupe and you think to yourself how DARE she go about her life while Im in pieces and doesnt she care that "Joe" is cold in the ground alone crying for company? And then you stop and realize that one day it will be her turn to wonder the same things about you or some other random person...maybe in a red open jeep. So, with this realization, what do we do with it?? How can we change it? I ask myself these questions after I arrive home and Im walking my dog. I have merely a moment to contemplate the answer when I notice this man walking into his apartment, home form work, dressed in a suit, home from work, goes to get his mail before going inside, home from work, for the thousandth time in the same routine, he is HOME FROM WORK! I almost weep for him and say a prayer that I wont be him. But does he even realize the tragedy of his life? Or maybe I have just pre-judged AGAIN! He could be happy in his mundane routine that has burned a hole in his synaptic vesicles. But even though the tragedy is the fact that he doesnt realize that there is a rotating world out there and he is missing it. He doesnt even wear a fonky hat nor does he notice the people that do wear fonky hats. He just sees the path he must use to arrive home...the path he knows better than his own name...the path with exactly 56 bumps and 2 curves, and 7 turns from point A to point B. I want to learn from his mistakes and make a more meaningful existence for myself and not rush home because I have a date with my mailbox. Does any of this make sense or am I completely nuts?
Do me a favor...the next time you are stopped at a red light, look for the lady in the fonky hat and try to understand her because she is in all of us...its just up to us to find her!!
this is going on BEBO too--havent chosen my blog spot yet so if your readin it again--OH WELL... KISSES