You know, the important thing to remember in this weird amalgam of chemicals and random numerical equations that we classify as Time and Space - is to to be Human.

As Humans, we sometimes find ourselves embarked on psychic and psychosomatic voyages that are governed by distant and diffuse masses that we classify as constellations of stars. We cannot fight the pull of this nebulous matter, nor should we.



 Incendiary Magazine´s new design is now in the vast Blacke Hole we know as....

...the World Wide Webbe. 

http://www.incendiarymag.com

(The site is gaining speed but is a bit slow after it's major surgery of the last 24 hours, so please be patient. And if you see anything untoward, drop us a mail, as we are in the process of cleaning the database of 5+ years' worth of material)

ANYWAY...

This month we have interviews with Scout Niblett, who talks of Asda and 'bums'. The LEGENDARY PAUL SIMPSON from the Wild Swans and Teardrop Explodes . Not forgetting a great interview with Cumbrian aesthetes the Wild Beasts...

And the following reviews of these fab LPs etc

The Parlour Steps - The Hidden Names
Morningbell - Sincerely, Severely
The Steals - Static Kingdom
Or, The Whale - Or, The Whale
Charlotte Hatherley – New Worlds
Le Loup – Family
Vivian Girls – Everything Goes Wrong
Githead – Landing
The Brilliant Colors – Introducing
Greg Davies – Mutually Arising
Lyenn – The Jollity of My Boon Companion
Michael Hurley - Ida Con Snock
Namosh – Keep It For Later
Rival Consoles – IO
Die Goldenen Zitronen – Die Entstehung Der Nacht
Adrian Crowley – Season of the Sparks
The Gilded Palace of Sin – You Break Our Hearts, We’ll Tear Yours Out
On Fillmore – Extended Vacation

'Live Reviews'
Franz Ferdinand & The Cribs - Heineken Music Hall, Amsterdam - 22/11/2009
Frank Turner - Melkweg 28th Nov
WOTNXT Presents… A party in the LVC, Leiden 26/11/09
These Monsters / Sennen Sub071, Leiden 19/11/09
Vox Von Braun, Bent Moustache, Bar en Boos, Leiden 14/11/09
Ein Abend in Amsterdam – Die Wende (feat. Cobra Killer) – Paradiso 6/11/09


'The Back Catalogue of Supergrass'

'Bright Sparks'
The Kabeedies - Rumpus
Hey Young Believer - Invisible By Day
Lullwater - Forest For The Trees
Andrea Rottin – Songs About Nightmares

'Letter from London'
The Airborne Toxic Event, Shepherd’s Bush Empire, Friday 6th November 2009

'Local Features'
Isbells – S/T
Sukilove - Static Moves

'Why Aren't You Listening'
Old Canes – Feral Harmonic

Oh yeah...



On behalf of all at Incendiary, Richardx

My Darlings:

Like Mr Pooter I feel the need to share with you my reminiscences and bad jokes in diary form, whilst painting my bath red. Like Peter Ackroyd, I feel the need to sit on your knee at a literary party and sing Judy Garland songs into your ear. Like Kingsley Amis, I feel the need to go on a mild debauch through the South Wales countryside with my fellow old gits. And like Gertrude Hermes I feel the need to create semi-abstract impressionist images and breed Alsatians.

But not right now.

Right now I want to tell you about Incendiary. We are 5. We have a new design coming next month (hopefully) and we have some new articles about some fanbloodytastic LPs and gigs an' that. Top do, cock.

No sub-Blue Peter UK-centric inanity (gosh Germans make music too?) from grinning types who didn't know their subject matter (yes, that BBC Krautrock documentary)

No. None of that. Just some cracking LPs & gig reviews you should check out.


       
    * Live
          o Joensuu 1685, The Stutters - Overtoom 301, Amsterdam 02/10/09
          o Fuck Buttons, Health, Picture Plane - Melkweg, Amsterdam 09/10/09
          o Subbacultcha! Presents: Hospital Bombers, Deze, Vinko Eerenstein, De Nieuwe Anita
    * Albums
          Chris Garneau - El Radio
          Brakes - Rock is Dodelijk
          The King Khan & BBQ Show - Invisible Girl
          Hope Sandoval and the Warm Inventions - Through the Devil Softly
          Gong - Gong 2032
          Ramona Falls - Intuit
          Jookabox - Dead Zone Boys
          Dub Tractor - Sorry
          The Black Heart Procession - Six
          Fuck Buttons - Tarot Sport
          Ruts DC - Rhythm Collision - Re-Loaded
          Hyperdub - 5 Years of Hyperdub

          The Sound of Lucrecia - Congost
          Philippe DeBarge and the Pretty Things
          Monster Island - The Anchor

Remember, Incendiary magazine, it's a Mystic Trip, if ever so slightly frayed

RJFxx

 
Still standing, somehow, despite a mountainous lethargy, the co-ordination skills of a carpet and an occasional predilection to hit the Hippy Trail and not come back for a month.
But sod it...
Hope you like the new edition,we're quietly proud of the writing within it for once!
Check this list out

Features
"Editors Rant"
Maps - Turning the Mind
The products of a warped mind - Incendiary celebrate Warp records

"Why aren't you listening? "
Japanther – Tut Tut, Now Shake Ya Butt
No Age – Losing Feeling
The Feelies – Crazy Rhythms

"Local Features"
Majestic Scene - Swinging in a Perfect Pose


Interviews
Incendiary Interview Maps
Incendiary Interview Fuck Buttons

"Bright Sparks"
Katsen - It Hertz!
Pride Parade - Dose

Reviews
"Live"
Spoelstra, Oldseed, This Leo Sunrise - Linkse Kerk, Leiden 19/09/09
Øresund Sound - SUB071, Leiden 17/09/09
Ontzettend Leiden 25/09/09
Orbital + Delphic - Manchester Academy 1, 18-19/09/09

"Albums"
The Fiery Furnaces – I’m Going Away
Pastels / Tenniscoats – Two Sunsets
Jim O’Rourke – The Visitor – Two Nice Catholic Boys
Spiral Stairs – The Real Feel
Smokers Die Younger -Smokers Die Younger
Chicken Feed - Out of My Boxes
Helado Negro - Awe Owe
Bike for Three! - More Heart than Brains
The Sexy Accident - mantoloking
Eva & The Heartmaker - Let's Keep This Up Forever
The Color Turning - Good Hands Bad Blood
When Icarus Falls - Over The Frozen Seas

"Rock Music"
Russian Circles – Geneva

"Dance Music"
Gavin Russom - Black Meterorite Star

Thanks Mac, CathA, Tristan, Jim, Daims, Mr Dawson, Hag, Dekel, Headley, Mr Gav, Rover, MartinOP, Debs, Zobot, Joe W, Kate, Julie, Captain Riot, Aldo, Renee, Arthur, Nathalie, Mr Maier, Matt, Matt G, Liesbeth, Hamish, Janine,Craig, Nina, Stefan & Linne and all the other fuckers who've felt my hot editorial skills make a right mess of their purple prose this last 5 years. Not to mention the bands and clubs etc etc and In de Wildemann for its patience & good humour.

Hullo!
Well, time's cruel tide has dictated that I haven't been able to sort a 5th relaunch birthday party out in October.

But sod that. We are not downhearted too much. I don't want Incendiary to be thought of as some poncey, self-preening meeja love-in with lots of air kissing and vegetarian finger buffets and people wearing animal print trousers and bottled water promotions... Oh no.

And anyway, the GENIUS of Vox Von Braun, and incredibly entertaining Fall-lovers Bent Moustache are playing the legendary squat bar Bar en Boos in Leiden. 14th November: A Saturday night, and about 4 euros in.

http://www.myspace.com/voxvonbraun
http://www.myspace.com/thebentmoustacheband

And I thought, bugger it, lets gatecrash that event and take advantage of 1 Euro beer direct from a bottle and an atmosphere that is direct from 1968 (albeit with considerably improved sanitary facilities).  

So; if you're up for it, that's what I'm strongly suggesting. I'll buy all writers & Incendiary Lovers a beer and all those who brave the channel. And Vox & the Moustache is a great line up too.

So in all honesty, you can go along and completely ignore me & watch the bands.

I expect to be in Londres & Lancashire to extend birthday celebrations in the Autumn of this year, but on a pub level. I expect to indulge in plenty of glowering, pie-stained tweeds, arguments on Funkadelic and King Tubby, and wiping the juice of them big pickled onions up with a copy of Kingsley Amis's raucous counter cultcha satire, "Girl 20".

Incendiary: Ain't no Formulaic Meeja Excercise! We're just not together enough...

Richard

Hello my darlings;

You know I want you all to feel happy. It's my one overriding concern in this Vale of Tears we call existence.

Imagine if you can that this glorious spam mail I received (and have printed out for your delight) is akin to the relationship between www.incendiarymag.com  and you, Dear Heart.

"With felicitation to write and communicate with you in this few lines of mine.My name is miss (Incendiary Magazine) i just browing right now in the internet and i found your profile and i was much feeling over it,Please my dear i will like us (that's Incendiary Magazine and you) to hold a good long time relationship with real love.I'm happy to look at your profile today,you sound so gentle to me that was the reason why i fall very much interested in you
For more introduction and my pictures will be send to you by next mail,so we can know more about each other, my dear,age or colour even distance can't deny any genuine love, (between Incendiary Magazine and you) so please lets give our self a trial,thanks till i hear from you soon."

Beautiful. I wept real tears.

Anyway, hopefully you will enjoy iLiKETRAiNS thoughtful interview, and the salty & succinct ruminations of Gravenhurst's Mr Nick Talbot (it's a whopping two-parter), and a quick chat with Ye Lord of Timperley, Mr Frank Sidebottom. We also run an interview with the greatest Welsh band you've not yet heard, Plant Duw who also providde us with a handy run-down of the Welsh scene. Yowsa!

Live reviews from the greatest festival ever to feel our high heels: HALDERN POP and the Green Man, where Yurts couldn't prevent us having a good time.

And look out! If you get a chance go to GOGBOT in Enschede! 10th September! Robots! Rock! Weird Shit! http://2009.gogbot.nl/

LP's covered at present (for more are coming my Dear Ones), are:
   * Land of Kush – Against the Day
    * Nudge – As Good As Gone
    * Sunset Rubdown – Dragon Slayer
    * Cabinet of Natural Curiosities - Searchlight Needles
    * Cornershop – Judy Sucked a Lemon for Breakfast
    * Barbara Morgenstern – BM
    * Obits – I Blame You
    * Evangelista (Carla Bozulich) – Prince of Truth
    * The Longcut – Open Hearts
    * Sixty Watt Bayonets – Pounding Hearts Fighting Words
    * The Wookies – Sparks
    * Badun – Tandoori Tentacle
    * David Cronenberg’s Wife – Hypnagogues

That's all for now!
Richardx

Hey hey, Haldern's been & gone for another year, but unfortunately that means you can listen to our podcast... No music, just rambling reviews and erm.. sound pictures.

Parts 1 & 2 are online, and 3 will follow when we get the moonbeans out of our hair..

The podcast has lots of other stuff on; just check the archive

http://www.incendiarymag.com/pod/

Oh yes. More feeble attempts at communication slightly above Neanderthal level are offered in this month's cast, when Richard and Damian try to be serious for about 5 minutes, only to then eat Ginger nuts.

http://www.incendiarymag.c..om/pod/

The broadcast is in two parts, with part the second getting a bit childish and unnecessary.

Tracks are:
Part 1
The Soundtrack Of Our Lives - Fly (a Nick Drake cover !?!)

My Vanity Project - Circus Of Pigs

Anthem In - Cloudbusting (A Kate Bush cover !?!)

Dark Knights Of Camelot - Wannabe

Monokino - Boring Combination

Believo! - Little Kisses

And Part 2
Paddy Steer - A Badger's North

Sugarplum Fairies - I Hate Saturdays (a duvet cover!?!)

Vengapal Chari - Different kind of motor car noises

Thee Oh Sees - Ruby Go Home

Johnny Cola & The A Grades - One Day All Of This Will Be Yours

Studio AS One vs Orkiestra Swietego Mikolaja - Kolomyjka Jarocinska Remix

Megafaun - Impressions of the past.

Hullo all;
Just to let you know, after 6 months of painful birth (size, time, the interviewer & me understandably bricking it in terms of doing the Great Man justice) we've got a 5-part interview with Julian Cope on the magazine.
I sincerely hope you all like it.


Here are the URLs
http://www.incendiarymag.com/modules.php?story_id=2156&menu_tab=reviews&backissue=0&name=News&new_cat=&file=article&sid=2156 (1)
http://www.incendiarymag.com/modules.php?story_id=2155&menu_tab=reviews&backissue=0&name=News&new_cat=&file=article&sid=2155(2)
http://www.incendiarymag.com/modules.php?story_id=2157&menu_tab=reviews&backissue=0&name=News&new_cat=&file=article&sid=2157 (3)
http://www.incendiarymag.com/modules.php?story_id=2158&menu_tab=reviews&backissue=0&name=News&new_cat=&file=article&sid=2158(4)
http://www.incendiarymag.com/modules.php?story_id=2159&menu_tab=reviews&backissue=0&name=News&new_cat=&file=article&sid=2159 (5)

What ho!

I have to say that seeing a Gypsy Ska band cover Napalm Death, seeing a children's choir whilst trying to ignore a chainsaw juggler, or bartering with the comely young Rolo Tomassi singer over a rafia carpet has meant that this month has been a wee bit surreal musically.

But are we not alive? Doth not Ye Sappe of Life itself run through the Verdant Sweet Imaginings of Musicke of an Electronicalie Amplified Kinde?

Summat like that. Otherwise I'm getting on. Well I am,you know, and I keep getting boils on my inner thighs, it's a bit weird.

By the way.

Tomorrow (14th) sees the release of a new issue, packed full of the usual goodies:

Fucked up and Royal Tomassi at Metropolis festival, Napalm Death and the Antwerp Gypsy Ska Orchestra at Werfpop.

An interview with the Wise & Righteous V. Vale of RE/Search publications (a must read for any true Head)

And (talking of Heads) a very, very special interview with a Major-league Dude, hung up, and hanging out to dry on Incendiary, very very soon. You guessed who it is yet?

And a great set of LP reviews:
Dirty Projectors - Bitte Orca
Diana Rogerson and Andrew Liles – No Birds Do Sing
Porn Sword Tobacco – Everything is Music to the Ear
Joker’s Daughter – The Last Laugh
Blank Dogs – Under and Under
Monokino – Human Error
Thee Oh Sees – Help
St Deluxe – S/T
Adam Payne - Organ
Believo! - Radical Myths
Paddy Steer – Dragon’s Breath
Wendy McNeill – A Dreamer’s Guide to Hardcore Living
Ivan Campo – Super 7
King Pest – demo
God Help the Girl - God Help the Girl
John Hopkins – Insides
The Brownies - Ourknife Yourback
Dark Knights of Camelot - Hurrication EP
Dodd Ferrelle - Lonely Parades
Sugarplum Fairies - Chinese Leftovers
Kirk Hamilton - The Exited Door
Johnny Cola & the A Grades - The Yellow Mini
Anthem In - The Cloudbursting EP
Megafaun - Gather, Form & Fly
The Elvis Suicide - Sweethearts
Moonshine Crows - Cake is Done
Deaf Judges - All Rise
The Burns Unit - Rock Bottom

And to top it all, Mister Gav knocks out a classssssic Shedcast full of alternative fun and frolics. It's a bobby dazzler, and as mystifying as one of Bobby Mitchell's turns was to an unlucky right back...

http://www.incendiarymag.c..om/pod/?p=home
Look out as its in MP4 format.

That's all for now!
Yours, (being old) Richard