So, I Super Dave Osbourned it today.
If you've been reading my notes:
http://blog.myspace.com/rodeoannouncer... you'll have read about my rodeo adventures, cooking experiences, and now....the I got hit by a car story.
They say you should get your eyes checked every year. I call BS on that, especially when it's the optricians who recommend it. Oh yeah...I'm a conspiracist...like dentists tell you to brush 3 times a day...I think Toothpaste causes cavities...of course they want you to get those...but I digress...
Anywho...
I go in for my eye exam, 4 years since my last one. My perscription has moved up just a lil' bit, but, it's good to get new lenses with the current needs of my lookers, so, I upgraded. My lenses were scratched baaaaaad anyway.
So, they dilated my eyes. They warn you not to drive for 3 hours. Once again, I call BS on that, because I have a slogan..."I'm Joe %$'n Scully, mo fo!"
I purchase my lenses...and of course, have to wait an hour, and I go shopping. I'm a little freaked because I can't read my Blackberry clearly. I go shopping for my sis' bday present. The item selected from her list is NOT AT THE MALL, however, I find out that there's a nearby store that has it.
So what does the Dilated Dummy do? Prepares to drive.
Well, apparently, the pupils are sensitive to light (hence the Blackberry problems...it has a bitchin' bright screen)...
I stroll out of the mall...through the side exit by Mall Administration...open the door, it's WAAAY Bright out...two steps across the sidewalk, across the street/parking lot....WHAM!
I walked into a moving taxi cab.
Yup. I didn't see it. I habitually glanced left and right, but, the sun was bright, and I guess I saw White, and that was alright...
luckily, I'm spry, and instead of Super Dave Osbourning it across the hood, I was able to do a lil' spin and stop myself with my hands.
Ol' Tajhinder Taxi-guy gets out, "Vwat are you doing der?"
and I said, "directing traffic, you didn't see me?"
It didn't hurt, but it scared the heck out of me.
Then, I proceeded to go to the truck and drive to the store...Nyce! I almost wrecked about 6 times across my 4 turns and 1/2 mile trip.
Into the store I ventured...wearing my huge-ass Sunglasses, as my eyes are burning...my pupils were dialated, and my eyes were WIDE OPEN from freaking out....and I couldn't see a thing...
But, Ray Charles was able to make his purchase and return to the mall without accident...ok, without more than one accident.
So, let me hop on a soap box...don't drive with Dialated Eyes. Don't Shop with Dialated Eyes. But if you do...wear a helmut!