It's time we stop with the retarded bulletins.

The repost this shite or you'll have bad luck bulletins? It's a damn chain letter. They weren't fun decades ago, they sure as hell aren't fun in their internet form now. The "please comment on my new pics 'cause I crave attention from complete strangers worse than a bored housewife craves a cute pizza delivery boy?" Also sad.

Another classic is the move where some dumb internet tart bitches about somebody that flaked on them or pissed them off, so they use the bulletins as a way to guilt trip the person. Be a fucking adult and cuss the person out like a savage. Save that tripe for your high school. 90210 has been off the air for quite some time. Grow up. Even worse when the person that does it is over 21. Makes me realize why tigers eat their young.

Oh, and I hates me some questionnaires. They're never short, mu'fuckers are longer than the paperwork at an automotive dealership. With society (myself included) having the memory of fish, forgetting things 10 minutes after the fact; I don't really need to know who your first kiss was and that you like the Used. While on the subject: QUIZZILLA IS STUPID. Like, really stupid. Somewhere between retarded cocker spaniel puppy and Evander Holyfield lies Quizzilla and the fucks that created it. I don't need to know which Napoleon Dynamite character I am, you people are distracting me from training to be a cage fighter and chatting with babes all day. Can I get a "gawd" from the congregation?

And the best, drum roll please, is when these goobers complain about how bored they are. Get off your ever-expanding lame ass and get out there and do something. Call your real friends and get some tall cans and get out the damn house (or blunts, or heroin, or confused young men, whatever) instead of staring at this upgraded idiot box (far more addicting to the weak minded than TV ever was) while pleading for other saps that don't really give two monkey turds whether or not you live or die to amuse you. And if you can't get out because of kids or house arrest, which are the same thing in my book, get a hobby. Guitars are under a hundred bucks for an ok beginner jammie. Arts and crafts are dirt cheap, especially if you jump the neighbor boy and take his crayolas. READ! And blogs do not count as reading. Don't get me going again on blogs. Cooking, you waddle into the kitchen, so do something besides nuking a hot pocket for once. Hell, even video games are a better waste of time than this godforsaken site and the drivel that spews from the majority of people's minds. At least with video games, you're practicing more hand-eye coordination than flogging the dolphin to the internet broad you've got a crush on. Which reminds me, I gotta go........cheers.

I was goin' through some old chronicles and enjoyed this one from Friday, April 21, 2006. So, I felt like posting it here:

Came home with a few in me the other night, flipped on the tv, landed at Cheers. Not quite sure of the episode exactly, I passed out........ER........fell asleep soon after hearing brilliance. Yeah, fell asleep, that's it. Cliff Clavin explained the "Buffalo Theory" to Norm:

"Well ya see, Norm, it's like this. A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine! That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."

Don't let the legwarmers and big hair fool you, the 80's supplied some great philosophies. Cheers.