I wonder if I'll ever do a show in L.A. when I'm fully prepared? I guess I did last year at the Viper room? There is just something about being on the west coast I guess. Laid back Hollywood. It feels like a movie. The smog is like a haze. Some film filter. Cepiatone. And you don't feel like you’re in a blockbuster either. It's more like a 70's film. Wired through the hills in a big car barley driving off the edge of the canyon knowing that even if you did you would somehow just continue to drive through mid air while your exhaust pipe would spit out some cheesy glitter effect as you fly by the big sign, HOLLYWOOD. I'm a little uneasy about actors out and about having a regular life and all. Yes I understand that there people but I still prefer they stayed on the screen. I remember going to the club Spaceland in Silverlake to see a show. We got a drink settled into a corner and standing next to us was John C. Reilly. And I'm thinking what is this, The Purple Rose of Cairo. And that guy is a real actor, which makes it worse. I mean you see some big star they're always doing something quickly and discreetly and your like "Oh there's so & so. Hey guess who I saw today, so & so." It's like you saw a trailer for a movie not someone who you reference from a film angling for a beer at the bar with you. I remember another time in her in Hollywood my friend invited me to go and see a show with some "friends" of his. Turns out his friends were also friends with Cameron Diaz who was also going to the show. I know big deal. But it was somehow very annoying. What are we going to say to each other really? Turns out not much although she was sweet as pie. But the point is I really don't need to go anywhere with Cameron Diaz. I want her to stay up there on the screen. Not be forced to act like hey I'm cool where people no big deal. Well, it is, because I've seen this persons face a million times be it a movie or a magazine. Now I'm suppose to be like "oh yeah, hey how are you nice to meet uh do ya know where the bathroom is?"(?).... I found the experience very frustrating. This is really only a problem in Hollywood. In NYC who cares! NYC is like a great equalizer. Every man women and Moby for themselves! In Hollywood you get the feeling if it goes down those helicopters that always seem to be there would swoop down and pick up Cameron Diaz and leave me in the fault! I guess it might be best just to go with the feel of the city being a movie and play the part." Did I ever tell you I was in a movie with John C. Reilly? Yeah we did a scene at Spaceland".

You must always be intoxicated. It is the key to all:the one question. In order not to feel the horrible burden of time breaking your back and bending you toward the earth, you must become drunk, without truce. But on what? On wine, poetry or virtue, as you wish. But you must get drunk. And if at times, on the steps of a palace, on the green grass of a ditch, in the mournful solitude of your room, you awaken, and your intoxication is already diminished or gone, ask the wind, the wave, the star, the bird, the clock, everything that flees, everything that groans, everything that rolls, that sings, that speaks, ask what time it is; and the wind, the wave, the star, the bird, the clock will answer you: "it is time to get intoxicated! In order not to be slaves martyed by Time, always become intoxicated! On wine, on poetry or virtue, as you will."