Former State Representative Terry Keel, who is currently representing State Representative Harold Dutton on a DWI case, is the new Parlimentarian.

Keel comes into the picture unexpectedly.  He is a fantastic and brilliant attorney who mostly represents criminal defendents. 

So, how much does Keel charge for counsel? 

The Speaker of the Texas House, Tom Craddick (R-Midland), is feeling the stress at this moment.

Considered the second most powerful person in the Texas Legislature, Craddick is facing a challenge from his own party and the Democrats to vacate the chair. 

This process has been going on since the start of the Legislative Session in January.  The Legislature is expected, by state constitution, to adjourn Monday.  With the adjournment, several thousand bills are expected to die.

Representative Jim Dunnam (D-Waco) asked a parliamentary question as to whether the Speaker would recognize a motion to vacate the chair?  Tom Craddick, rightly so, said he wouldn't.  When asked if that ruling would be open for a vote, Craddick again said no. 

Todd Smith (R-Euless), whom I've had the privilage of working with, and Jim Pitts (R-Waxahachi) asked Craddick whom the parlimentarian worked for.  Does the Parlimentarian work for the House body or just the Speaker?

The House stood at ease as the Speaker spoke with the Parlimentarian and his other lieutenants.  When he returned, the Speaker continued on with the next bill on the agenda. 

When Pitts returned to the back mic to ask what his answer to his question was, Craddick motioned to recess until 11pm tonight.  Pitts seemed surprised when his mic was turned off and the Speaker walked off the dais. 

Supposedly, the Parlimentarian, Denise Davis, has resigned her position and his lieutenants are breaking quorum. 

If the House doesn't have quorum, then the session as we Texans know it is over.  Several hundred bills that were on the calendar and pending final approval are dead. 

Read more here, here, and here.

I actually received this from a buddy.

1.) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

2.) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

3.) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

4.) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

5.) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)

6.) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7.) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome.

8.) Whatever: Is a women's way of saying %#$* YOU!

9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking "What's wrong?". For the woman's response refer to #3.

Texas State Representative Byron Cook, Chairman of Civil Practices, has asked Speaker of the House Tom Craddick to step down.

Cook has given Craddick an ultmatum to either step down as Speaker before May 28th or face a "bloody" challenge.

This is a must see and listen audio/video:

May 21, 2007

I am a crack dealer in Beaumont, Texas who has recently been diagnosed as a carrier of HIV virus. My parents live in Fort Worth. One of my sisters lives in Pflugerville and is married to a transvestite.

Signed,

Worried About My Reputation

Today, State Representative Jim Keffer (R-Eastland) announced to the Republican Caucus that he will be challenging the current speaker for his position. 

State Representative Tom Craddick (R-Midland) was elected to speakership after a victorious 2002 election year where Republicans regained the majority of state offices.  Politics in Texas was promised to changed; however, time showed it changed for the worse. 

To review, Craddick was asked by then-Congressman Tom Delay to revisit redistricting in 2003 and redraw lines that would strenghten the Republican control of the U.S. Congress.  After a few walkouts by State Democrats to Ardmore, Oklahoma and Albuquerque, NM, the Texas Legislature finally gave Delay his map.  

During the 2004 General Election, the map was seen as a success as the Republicans gained several congressional seats in Texas. The State Republican Party did see a small decline in the Texas Legislature; nonetheless, they were still in control.

School finance during the 2005 sessions then became an issues that further divided the State Legislature.  Craddick was seen as unwilling to compromise with Lt. Governor Dewhurst and Governor Rick Perry.  As a final compromise, the leadership decided to focus more on property tax relief than school finance reforms; however, Craddick saw another opportunity to steer legislation that favored his political ideology.  After several special sessions, which cost taxpayers over 2 million dollars, a compromise on property tax relief was reached.

During the 2006 election year, Craddick was seen as a kingmaker.  He helped recruit candidates to run against representatives who voted against him on major legislation in during the previous session. Several of his loyal lieutenants lost their elections.  Many consider their close tie with Craddick as a reason for their loss.  Now, the Republican party controls the House by only six seats.            

The 2007 Legislative Session started with major drama with two vying for the Speakership--Representative Jim Pitts (R-Waxahachie) and Representative Brian McCall (R-Plano).  McCall bowed out and supported Pitts, but Pitts lost to Craddick after an amendment to make the voting anonymous failed.  After regaining his position as Speaker, Craddick stripped Pitts from his chairmanship of Appropriations. 

Several rulings by the Speaker became questionable during the legislation session.  However, it wasn't until last weeks ruling that made several Republicans change their minds about their leader. 

State Representative Ryan Guillen (D-Rio Grande), one of Craddick loyals, had a local bill that only addressed Zapata County.  To avoid being delayed further on a technicality, the chairman of the Calendars Committee, decided to place the local bill on Major State Calendar, which is reserved for bills that have an impact statewide.  The technicality was called that this bill was a local bill and should be considered on the Local Calendar or General Calendar.  Craddick overruled and determined that the House Calendars Committee has discretion on placing the bill on any calendar they wish.

An appeal to the Speaker's ruling was challenged by Representative Charlie Geren (R-River Oaks) and Representative Robert Talton (R-Pasadena).  87 House members, the majority, voted to over turn the Speaker's ruling.  This outcome caused the scenerio we face today.

During the Mother's Day weekend, rumors started to fly around the Capitol of a possible coup d'etat.  At center stage is Representative Jim Keffer (R-Eastland). 

According to the Quorum Report, Keffer received word that a House member--possibly the neighboring district's representative--had contacted Granbury Mayor David Southern to entice him to run against Keffer in the next election.  When Keffer confronted the Mayor, Southern admitted that he was approached but had no intentions to run.  Keffer then decided to file for the speakership this morning.

According to other blogs, a motion to remove the chair might come very soon.  Why soon?  There are less than two weeks left in the legislative session.  Once the legislature ends, legislators return home to their jobs--they won't return until January 2009 or if the Governor calls a special session.  Legislators will face their election in 2008 before the next legislative session. 

So, Keffer et al's best bet is to make a motion to remove the chair before the end of session, which is May 28th.  This would provide the legislature a new speaker during the interim before a critical election year.  

This was forwarded to me from a friend.

The Rescue

One day, three boys were walking over a bridge when they heard a guy yelling for help. It was President Bush. He was drowning, and the three boys rescued him. He thanked them dearly and promised them whatever they wanted as a reward.

The first boy wanted $10,000, so Bush gave him the money. The second boy wanted a Ferrari, so Bush gave the boy a Ferrari.

The third boy wanted a wheelchair, Bush said, "Why do you want one of those, son, you're not handicapped." The boy replied, "I will be when my dad finds out whose life I saved."

Ever listed to The Wannadies?  This Swedish band is very addicting and you'll soon either be a fan. 

From Barats and Bereta.