I was reading through the back postings of a friends blog today, and I found a mention I had noticed before, that he had lost a "brother" named Max Vague. The first time I saw this I really did not think to much about it. Perhaps it is because it has been so common for for people who ride to call close friends brother. but in this case I have discovered that brother means brother.
Why didn't I realize this before? Well because I never knew Max Vague. I knew Bill. Bill was my friend Jim's younger brother and I knew him in the early 80's when they lived in California. Jim had a band and I ran lights, hauled equipment and sometimes security. I was in the Army at the time,
I remember when I got to know Bill, I was kicking back with Jim at his house and we were checking out the pirate LP of Pink Floyd The Wall that he had just got, and Bill came in the room waving my poetry book at me and saying "Can I use this?" I looked and it was a short I had written called Ghost Light. I said sure, but I want to hear what you do with it. and put it out of my mind.
A few weeks later Bill asked if I would "Borrow" Jim's lights for a gig his band had at the Monterey Conference Center for Save the Whales. I agreed. That night I hauled the bulk of the bands lights out for the show. I remember how worried I was about what Jim would say about borrowing the lights, but I figured that he wouldn't mind to much if I did this for his brother, and it was for the whales after all.
Bill and his band put on a really awesome performance that night, very Ziggy Stardust meets Pink Floyd, with the full makeup and tunes to match and then, he played Ghost Light. I was stunned! I couldn't believe that he had taken that simple verse and made it feel like a real song. I was pleased with what he had done, and I hope he was pleased with my lights that night. I had rigged a a right and left bank at front center stage for bottom lighting and when he stepped up I lit him with red and blue spots from below and rocked the colors back and forth while he sang. The effect with Bills pale white face paint was excellent and somewhat chilling. The audience response was tremendous. and I remember thinking that he, just like his brother would go a long way in music.
I chatted with him and the band after the show, and we packed up the gear and got out. That's how it always goes when the show is over, the adrenalin wears off and there's just the chores. I'm sorry to say that I didn't see much more of Bill. It was not long after that that I became a father for the first time, and was ordered to Berlin Germany for duty. During that time I lost track of Jim and his family.
Now I find that during the passing of 25 or so years, Bill did indeed continue with his music, becoming Max Vague and cutting several albums, I have had the pleasure of hearing a few of his songs, and I have spent several hours remembering him as he was back then. I think about Jim and his mother and my heart breaks. I have never lost a child or a brother so I cannot imagine what they felt. I hope they can forgive me if what I write here causes them any pain. But I could not let him pass without saying a few things I am feeling.
Bill, I am sorry I missed the rest your life. You were someone I would have liked to know better. You gave me such a gift. You took my words and brought them to life with music. For a moment they lived, and in that moment I lived, and I have remembered that moment ever since. I am sorry I never got to know Max Vague.
Ghost Light
Blazing stars, shown through the night
flickering ghosts of far away light.
Rain laden clouds, drift across the moor,
shadowing the houses of the poor.
Yet the young grow up, to start anew,
to search for life and love that's true
to live and learn, to love and hate,
to learn to rush, and learn to wait.
To wile away the sunny days,
till all return home, each their own way.
they end their lives, as they quietly wonder
how far from home does starlight wander.
Max Vague was lost to the world August 13 2005