The year is ending.

And whatever that means to you - Good, bad, pointless, smelly, stupid, not a moment too soon (or too late) - It is what it is, and ultimately, we are better people for having experienced what we have experienced.

Now, go and eat your leftover Christmas fruitcake, you bastards.

I've been playing this for the last 2 hours.  I can't stop.

Don't start.  Seriously.  You've been warned. =P

http://randomchaos.com/games/fastr/

No, seriously.  I'm dying. 

I can't breathe.  Last night I had a dream that I visited the Virgin in NY.  I couldn't use my employee discount and it made me sad.

I can barely hold my head up right now.l  How my fingers are doing this magical thing called tiyping is beyond me.  It's almost as though they're independeent from the rest of my body.

ugh.sdfl.  blarghlsdf.

i'm deteriorating.  i'm melting into a puddle of flora.  squish squish says the puddle.

meep. =(

I've got a bug, and I feel like shiite.

I need to feel better by tomorrow.  I need to.

Why?  No real reason.  I have no plans.  I just hate to feel like shit for longer than I need to.

I want Pho.  Now.

Pho sho.

Yeah, shut up.  I'm sick... Cut me some slack, Jack.

I give off the wrong impression sometimes.

It's the wrong impression, though.  Meaning, it's not me.

I have trouble being ok sometimes.

Today's one of those times.  Blargh.

Remember that job interview that I screwed up on majorly, with my "Likes" and "You knows"?

Apparently, they're calling around for my references...

Uhhh... What?

Seriously.  My brain's going to explode.

*pop*

You have no idea how many times I've been ribbed by people for sounding Canadian, particularly because of the lilt I sometimes have in my voice when I ask a question, and because I have an occassional tendency (mostly when I'm not thinking about it) to say the words "about", "hour", "doubt", and "sorry" with a longer 'O' sound, somewhere between 'ow' and 'oo'.
How this little quiz thingy could deduce that from the very few questions it asked is beyond me, but there you go... Even the internet's poking fun at me now, eh? 

I am getting better.  The motivation is slowly creeping back in, and I've written more in the last month than I have in the last five years.
Nothing will ever be perfect, but I'm moving toward something. Granted, I'm running in 9 million different directions, and taking a thousand pit-stops along the way... But I'm working on it.

Keep the faith.  Have some pie.  Call your mother.

I worry about you and I want you to be ok.  Do something nice for yourself today.
Then thank yourself and do your own happy dance.

But no stealing mine.  I swear, I'll sue the pants off of you...

Thanks.  No, seriously, thanks...
It makes me laugh each and everytime you do that.

Also, thanks for that other thing, too.
You know that other thing... The one that makes me do my patented happy dance.
The world enjoys it, as do I.

I hope that I'll one day be able to repay the favor.

PS - You're so cool.  You, and you, and even you, despite that one thing that you did.  I don't care.  Not today, anyway.

PPS - I'm a little homesick... Weird.

The last time I looked for a job, I told myself I was going to keep all pertinent information in a notebook, so that the next time it happened, I wouldn't be scrambling for addresses or supervisor's names (or current whereabouts).

That didn't happen, and now, I'm vowing, once again, that I'm so going to do that this time... For next time.  You can dig it.  I know that you can.

Anyway, I have an interview tomorrow for an Allocation Analyst position, and I'm terrified.  I don't know if any of you know this or not, but at the end of my stint with Virgin, I ended up with the title of Planner/Allocator for the Music division.  And I had no idea what I was doing.  Seriously.

Nonetheless, it's what's on my resume, and someone decided to actually BELIEVE me... Silly people.  Don't you know that everyone embellishes a little on their resumes?

Regardless, I managed to bullshit my way throught the initial interview with the HR person well enough to get the second interview.  But this time, I'll be interviewing with people who actually know the position, and who will likely see through my bullshitting skills (as magnificent as they are), enough to know that I may know a little less than one would guess just looking at my resume.  I mean, ok, I'm not a complete moron, and I do at least know the function of an allocator.  I have a vague sense of how one would go about allocating (were there no math or analysis involved, albeit)...

Either way, I'm hoping that this company will feel like giving a girl a break, and be willing to teach me the things that I don't completely know.  I'm a pretty quick study, but how do you convey that to a person interviewing you?... Short of just saying, "I'm a pretty quick study", mind you.

Meh.  Keep your fingers crossed for me.  I'm already starting to break out into a rash from unemployment/lack-o-money stress.

On with the search for the many phone numbers of job-supervisors past...

Life can be funny if you take a step back and look at yours.

I'm taking a step back.  I need a good laugh.

Plans in the air for tomorrow, as they usually are.  I'm hoping it's fun, whatever I end up doing.  I haven't been having too much fun lately - Feel like I've been missing a lot.  That needs to be fixed quickly.

No more job... Check.  Last day in my apartment tomorrow... Check.  Plenty o' booze... Check.  Halloween costume... NO CHECK!!!  Argh!  I'm no winnerrrrr!!!
=(
*Dies*

Recent events have me hiding for the time being.

Give me a few days to recover from my reeling mind and my fear of the future.

I'll call you soon.  Really...

It's looking like I'm not even going to try for Bunker tonight. =(

Why, you ask?

My body is telling me right now, at this very moment, that I'm possibly on the verge of sickness, and I need to sleep heavy and well.  I need to drink orange juice, eat chicken noodle soup and cuddle with my kitty in my bed.  I need my mom to hug me and rub my head because she loves me.
I need to just... stop.  For a second, at least.

I'm running myself ragged at the moment, and I can feel it in my brain that if I don't take a small break, I could end up cracking again... And nobody wants that.

So my apologies to those of you I told that I was going to try to go tonight.  The weather's changing, and my brain is standing on the ledge of a building and holding up a white flag.  And I get the feeling that it's not just doing it for attention.

S.O.S.

Blargh.

How is it that I knew nothing about the W.A.S.T.E. and VNV Nation thing at Bunker this Friday??!  It's sold out, naturally, which means that yours truly will be left to sit outside of the Catch One, trying to listen and making sad little puppy dog faces for a good portion of the night.
Such a bummer!!

And for something that has absolutely nothing to do with anything else, I have to say that I see absolutely nothing sexy about Justin Timberlake.  Except for his skinny tie.  That's hawt.
Still, he reminds me of that friend's kid brother that you just want to smack around for trying too hard... You know that guy.

I'm both hot and cold.  This is new...