Lolabrigada's new show -- "Taking It To the Next Level" -- is set to drop! Whether you've seen us 17 times or never, you need to come check this out. Each show highlights a different facet of the four-headed monster that is Lolabrigada, and each show features a special guest of the highest quality. Look!

5/10 -- Scenes selected by Jenn Dodd, with special guest Jake Goldman (of Rififi's "Barrett and Goldman Present...")

5/17 -- Scenes selected by Tom Lorenzo, with special guest Bare Hand Wolf Chokers (first show in over a year, one of our favorite groups ever).

5/24 -- Scenes selected by Ben Hill, with special guest Will Franken (this dude is already at the next level...absurdist comedy that destroys everything in its path)

5/31 -- Scenes selected by Tim Girrbach, with special guest Walker and Cantrell (these ladies have already destroyed everything in their path).

Every show will be unique! Audience giveaways every week! Attend all four.

That's 5/10, 17, 24 and 31st at 11 p.m.

The P.I.T. -- 154 W.29th Street, btw. 6th and 7th Ave.  

Sorry that it's been a long time since we rapped at ya, folks. We've been busy. And, goddammit, after more false starts than a relay race for the deaf and blind, we finally have got Lolabrigada.com up and running. We thought it would never happen, but here I am typing this as I listen to the Grateful Dead while my wife sleeps in the next room (True story; kill me now). Lolabrigada.com has videos, show info, links to all our friends in "the scene" and, best of all, random bullshit.

So please visit Lolabrigada.com. That's lolabrigada.com

lolabrigada.com

lolabrigada.com

We'll make it worth your while.

Lolabrigada: The Pace is Glacial. 

Every once in a while I propose ideas for new blogs that I feel will take on a life of it's own and become a reoccurring/weekly, if not daily, post (See: YouTube Magic Johnson, Breaking Daily News, and Film Reviews for examples).  Well, as I sit here and listen to Donovan hail the holy land of Atlantis, I thought/think, why not reach way down and blog about something you know nothing about.  Here, I give you a film review of a film that I've never seen, yet feel like I am capable of writing a thorough review based on its one and only IMDB grail of a web-site. 

Today, I review Sweet November (2001).

 This film looks crafty.  It stars Keanu Reeves and Charlize Theron as two people who eventually fall in love with one another.  Maybe.  The tagline reads, and this is great, "She Just Needed A Month To Change His Life For Ever."  Oh, sweet! November! 

 So, I'm sitting here reading a "plot summary" and all that I gather is that this one dude, Keanu, somehow makes this one chick, Charlize, miss her driving test at the DMV.  So, as V. Piper points out, "bitch* tracks him down."  Then they go on and live together for a month just like Dupree did with You and Me. 

 In "oh, shit, that fucking guy?" news, this film also stars Greg Germann…wait for it…Sandlot 2?  Alley McBeal?  "High School Narc"?  knew I'd get you on that last one!  So, he's in it.  AND, yes, and, Skelator!  Yeah, Frank Langella from the He-Man movie.  He actor.  He man.  He good. 

..

So, let me give you my feelings on this movie.  Now, you are correct, I haven't seen this movie.  But, based on the IMDB site, the reviews –  (Myles Fenix) "….the thing that was kinda like....$lutty about Sara was that she slept with most, if not all, of the guys she had for each month. I don't blame Nelson for being kinda angry about that. I mean, come on, she slept with half the city!!! Lol…." -  I happen to agree.  Nelson should have been upset.  Right?  WRONG! 

 Kiera101 chimes in with, "she's not a slut..! whatever man.."  Whatever man is right!  good point.  And it got me thinking, what is, in fact, a "slut." 

 Well, Threedots-dead answers that one for us here – "'Slutty' is just another word made up by stupid men who feel threatened by women that are taking things in their own hands (no pun intended)."  Couldn't agree anymore.  If this Sara was sleeping with half the city, then so be it.  We can question a woman's motives all we want, but it's her right.  Right? 

 Take ShizaMinelli and her(?) thoughtful response – "What name would you give to a woman who sleeps with men for a month and then ditches them? Sorry, but cancer or not, that's pretty slutty."  She threw out the 'C' card!  Shiza, you bitch!  Why didn't anyone tell me that Sara had cancer?  So, does this mean??  Of course it does!  Take it home SuperKitty777 – "of course she's dying anyway so what's a few sexually transmitted diseases gonna hurt??"  Note: she, herself, is not a slut. 

So, to recap:  this chick misses her driving test.  Wants to get revenge and bang this dude.  She's dying, so she doesn't wear a rubber.  Threedots-dead does not think her a slut.  Joe can't make it to Julio's 49^th birthday.  And "Keanu is the biggest turkey since Kevin Costner" (jakefree). 

 I give this movie 6 out of 10.  If she dies in the end while he's inside her, then I give it a 7.  Go see it in good faith.  Know that the IMDB, and I, have your back.  Until next time…

 

El Sway.

         

There has been a lot of YouTube traffic thanks to two specific members of Lolabrigada - JesusMary and Joseph (aka Jenn and Tom).  So, in our attempt to make something out of nothing, we bring you - YouTube Magic Johnson.  This will be our attempt to share with you what we've found.  Sure, you can find it yourself, buuuut, fuck it, give us a reason to fill this ol' blog up.  Thanks.

For our first installment, I decided to go a little lite.  Lite on teh feet, if you will.  Enjoy!



Owned!  Love it when kids fall.  Hard.

This next clip is for the weed-heads and the beat-breakers.  There is something gained in getting your high on while listening to the Lost Prophet.  I give you the dopest beat and freshest rhyme-sayer.... Jeru the Damaja....




so, let's all share in this everlasting attempt to bring you children falling, or bring old school players to new school fools so you can, you know...

-el sway

It's the summertime, and Lolabrigada is a bit less active than usual. That gives me the opportunity to get caught up on this here blog. I have a lot to say. I'm Ben, by the way.

Now, anyone who knows me personally is aware that my comedic hero has always been and always will be Weird Al. Get off your high horse and admit he is awesome.

Nonetheless, the man is not perfect, and I believe I can enhance my mental and spiritual evolution by questioning and challenging him on occasion. Here goes: 

In my opinion, one of the most poorly thought-out and regrettable songs he ever recorded was "My Baby's In Love With Eddie Vedder".

Now, one would thing that a song with that title would have come out at the height of Pearl Jam's popularity. But this little ditty wasn't on 1991's "Off the Deep End", 1994's "Alapalooza", or even 1996's "Bad Hair Day."

No, it came out on 1999's "Running With Scissors". By 1999, Pearl Jam were an enduring rock band with a solid base of fans, but hardly at the cusp of the mainstream. They were a eight years removed from "Ten", their debut record that made them a household name.

Yet, the lyrics to the song never acknowledge how much time had passed since the heyday of grunge music and the "alternative" scene. Over a Zydeco-influenced accordion riff (what?), Al sings about how his unnamed "baby" loves that Vedder is "so darn dysfunctional and Generation X-y" and that she "can't get enough of his sullen demeanor. Like he's some big tortured genius and I'm some kind of weiner."

That is Weird Al's worst couplet ever.

Later, Al expresses jealously over the fact that his baby is knitting Eddie a sweater, an activity that is clearly only taking place because that particular article of clothing rhymes with "Vedder".

Oooh...and then there's the song's punchline, in which Al turns the tables in an oh-so-unsatisfying manner:

"Well, let's just see how jealous she gets, when I start stalking Alanis Morrisette."

Boo!!! Boo!!! Boo!!!

Now, it is to Weird Al's extreme credit that he has been able to transcend the ephemeral nature of "novelty songwriter". He is an enduring American icon. Nonetheless, a song like "My Baby's In Love With Eddie Vedder" is unforgivable largely because it came out well past it's logical pop-cultural moment. Al willfully undercut the power of the songs message, and in someone of his line of work that is a cardinal sin. I'm disappointed in you, Al.

But I still love you. Boy, do I ever.

Is it pornography or art?  Either way, Lolabrigada would like to extend a warm welcome to the newest member of our family, Sam Alexis Woods.   Born to Tiger and Elin Woods, contrary to popular belief Sam Alexis is neither half Tiger, nor half finished.  She won't be completely born until we all get a good view of her in all her glory on the cover of Golf Digest with Tiger Woods lying topless on a couch with little SAW quietly asleep on his chest.  Then, and only then, will she be 'born.'  Congrats to the Woods family and the Lolabrigada family.  Because, afterall, we just gained a new fan. 



In other news, in the world's largest game of "Capture the Flag," Taleban rebels have captured a district in the southern Afghan provoince of  Kandahar.  Injured Afghan coalition fighter, Mawli Hammdullah, called 'bullshit' when he claimed he was "totally in the safety zone." 



Nascar had no comment.....

It has been brought to our attention (by us) that this past weekend was the one year anniversary of Lolabrigada as a 4-piece.  Congratulations, Us. 

Please send us gifts.  Or come to our show this Saturday. Your presence is our presents. 

In sad Lola news, the gentlemen of Lolabrigada are forced to perfom an all-male show on May 26th.  Yes, Jenn has to go see her 'cut-ass' brother graduate that weekend (seriously, we all have a man crush on Jenn's brothers).  So, we will tap into our inner bro's while tapping into your asses and make sure that we come up with a handsome fella type of show.  

plus-  our new web-site is on its way, along with new videos and a podcast!  yeah sons! 

Dudes! We totally rocked DC. Our show was SRO (standing room only, not single room occupancy), and we brought down the house with a mix of old favorites and new scorchers. We packed nudity, ripped clothing, blood and Andy Capp into 20 minutes. Nice. The Cryptkeeper loved it.

Perhaps more importantly, we traveled well together. No fights, no smashed rental cars, no trashed hotel rooms, nothing. We just did our thing and then retired to our room to watch "Benchwarmers" (really, where would black kids be without the help of altruistic whites? The African-American community thanks you from the bottom of their hearts, Keanu).

Of course, we returned home to find that our next two shows have to be rescheduled. No matter. We're riding high (soooo high) and nothing can bring us down, except perhaps death's sweet embrace. That's what I call a win-win situation!

Ben

So, every now and then we all receive one of those messages from some Russian girl who just came to America and is looking to fondle an American Yankee stud.  Of course, we all know that these messages are written by some old white man from his basement in Duluth, MN.  Well, most of us know that.  But, what strikes me is the effort put into these messages to make them seem like they are actually written by a young, obviously horny, Russian ??????? (woman, for those of you who don't speak Russian).  Note the effort made put into the misspellings (not in my post, but in the letter), the gramattical errors (again... in the letter) and the many talents of this lively young future soccer mom.  Enjoy!  Oh, and feel free to contact her.  I never actually called 'dibs' on her....
tjl

Hi. My name is Yuliya. I ?m 24 olds. I live in Russia. I shall arrive
to your country in 2 months to receive the medical diploma. I shall be
in your country 3 months and then I shall come back to Russia to some
months. I search relationships. I very much want to get acquainted with
gentle, kind, tender, fair the man. I to hope that you are very similar
on such the man. And if you to search for the kind, careful woman that
probably we should get acquainted?! I to work as the childrens doctor.
I very much love children, but I to not have children.
I to play on a piano. I very much love music. I was good to sing. I to
be able is very tasty to prepare. I like to read books. I to hope that
I to interest you. I shall wait from you the letter. My address
Ulchikp@yandex.ru
With Hope, Yuliya.
P.S. or send me your email plz