Yo....

Steve and I did a guest mix for ministry of sound radio under our Paris Syndrome ( www.myspace.com/parissyndrome ) name...

You can download it for free here if you want

http://www.zshare.net/audio/1355551761b53bf0/

Tracklist

1 - Electric head - White Zombie
2 - Get Carter syndrome - Paris Syndrome
3 - I.I.F. - 120 Dance
4 - Take the Weight - Plump djs
5 - 2 ugly sisters - Paris Syndrome vs Colin Brown
6 - Streetlife DJs - Gunn Crime
7 - Pogo - Digitalism
8 - Blue Monday - New Order (Paris Syndrome re-edit)
9 - Get Smashed Gate Crash - Hadouken! (Station x remxi)
10 - Dirty F**k - Station X
11 - The Cat - Paris Syndrome (Station X remix)
12 - Human Robotics - Station X

Cheers!

So, I have put up a new song 'rebirth'. Not one of my best, but what can I do.

Here is the binary that I mentioned....

Binary binary binary binary binary

01000011 01101111 01101110 01100111 01110010 01100001 01110100 01110101 01101100 01100001 01110100 01101001 01101111 01101110 01110011 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01101000 01100001 01110110 01100101 00100000 01110011 01110101 01100011 01100011 01100101 01110011 01110011 01100110 01110101 01101100 01101100 01111001 00100000 01100100 01100101 01100011 01101111 01100100 01100101 01100100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01101101 01100101 01110011 01110011 01100001 01100111 01100101 00101110 00101110 00101110 00100000 01100010 01110101 01110100 00100000 01100100 01101111 01101110 00100111 01110100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01101001 01101110 01101011 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01100110 01110101 01101110 00100000 01110011 01110100 01101111 01110000 01110011 00100000 01101000 01100101 01110010 01100101 00101100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01100110 01110101 01101110 00100000 01100001 01100011 01110100 01110101 01100001 01101100 01101100 01111001 00100000 01110011 01110100 01101111 01110000 01110011 00101110 00101110 00101110 00101110 00100000 00100000 00100000 00100000 00100000 00100000 00100000 00100000 00100000 00100000 00100000 00100000 00100000 00101110 00101110 00101110 00101110 00101110 00100000 01101000 01100101 01110010 01100101 00101110

Title:
The Hollyoaks Science Experiment (T.H.S.E.), Jamie Ballantyne, 26th September 2006. 

Abstract:
I set out to finally resolve the decade long dispute of 'Is Hollyoaks damaging our brains?' The results came back as 100% - Yes.

Theory: 
Hollyoaks is said to be so shit, that anyone who watches it for more than 25 consecutive minutes will lose the same amount of brain cells as if they were to constantly drink Jack Daniel's whiskey for 4 months without any sleep. I set out to prove whether this is true or not. 

Experimental procedure:
20 human subjects were taken from their natural habitat in the desolate plains of Slough. As most people in Slough have no televisions due to high crime rates; it was assumed they had not built up a natural immunity to channel 4's Hollyoaks.

IQ tests were carried out on all 20 humans. 10 of the humans were then subjected to 200 continuous hours of Hollyoaks whilst the other 10 were put in boxes with no sunlight, food or water for the same amount of time. Brain activity was monitored throughout the experiment.  

Sample Calculations:
Hollyoaks + time = Irreversible brain damage on humans and some species of invertebrates (from Slough).

Graphs:

Results:

The 10 humans in the boxes were let out at the end of the experiment; they had sustained high levels of hunger and thirst. They had developed a 'gollum-esque' appearance similar to that of a computer games tester due to the lack of sunlight but were otherwise ok.

The 10 humans subjected to Hollyoaks were not in such good shape. What little IQ any of them had was now depleted. Serious brain damage had by now set in. The following symptoms were noted in all 10 humans after just 35 minutes of the Sunday Hollyoaks omnibus;

·         Loss of simple movement of various body parts.

·         Inability to plan a sequence of complex movements needed to complete multi-stepped tasks, such as making coffee and changing the television channel.

·         Loss of flexibility in thinking.

·         Difficulty with problem solving.

·         Difficulty in distinguishing left from right.  

·         Problems with balance and movement.

·         Dizziness and nausea.

·         Loss of ability to walk.

·         Slurred Speech.

·         New found ability to find humour within 'the friday night project' and 'The Charlotte Church show'.

·         Loss of desire to change the channel when 'Shipwrecked' or 'Big Brother' comes on.

·         Difficulty in understanding spoken words.

·        Difficulty in swallowing food and water.

By the time the experiment had finished, it was far too late to do anything for these humans, they were by now completely brain dead and unable to perform any form of basic human function. It is sad in a way; but they are still able to make some kind of a life for themselves. Some of them returned to Slough to work in the Police Constabulary whilst others ironically now 'star' in Hollyoaks.  

Discussion/Conclusion:
I think that my experiment shows beyond any reasonable doubt that if you watch Hollyoaks, you will lose the ability to use your brain.

Although it could be argued that there was no point in putting the other 10 humans in boxes as part of this experiment - it was a fucking laugh.