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Last Updated: 12/17/2009

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Gender: Male
Status: Swinger
Age: 18
Sign: Gemini

City: lil' egypt
State: Maryland
Country: US
Signup Date: 3/5/2006

Blog Archive
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October 10, 2009 - Saturday 

Current mood:enlightened
Category: Religion and Philosophy
anything is possible, your mind is in synchronization with the minds of others, things happen because people believe they will, its kind of programmed into our brains through repititious techings and observations, thus, seeing isnt believing, believing is seeing
 
god is only real if you accept the fact that he is, you are alive because you think you are, thus manipulating all the parts that make your physical body live actually function, if influenced to believe truley you were dead, you would die, mind over matter is in all seriousness the key to the universe, the salvation of our planet is intelligence, but intelligence isnt knowimg something, its about being completley dumbfounded and creating the universe around you
 
the sky is down and its bright outside when the sun goes down, there is no set laws of perspective, and free will is given to provide a basis on the fundemental journey in the pursuit of happiness, though most find only despair and hardships because of the mass numbers of pessimistic negative brainwaves, put into the synchronization you must free your mind of all oddities of positive influence and thought, optimism and belief in great accomplishment through your embarkment of life will hold all the answers and the key to success in which you will find when you surpass the need for physical properties and dwell in your subconcious forevermore in an abstract paradox of interdimensions
 
whoever says the earth is round is a liar, it is only round because they say it is, well if flat is round to me , then the world is flat, and i am correct because i believe that and i can justify my answer
never let fear hold you back , boundaries are there to keep people from advancing mentally, but mentally , we arent taught, we are enlightened
that my dear is something everybody should know
9:06 AM 
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September 1, 2008 - Monday 

Current mood:  contemplative
Category: Religion and Philosophy
idealistically speaking the concept of heaven and hell runs amuck in our minds and follows us subconciensley throughout our everyday life.the imaginitive effects on the matter make us preceive everything in a right or  wrong category and the realization of punishment seems inevitable for harmful deeds whether it to be to ourselves or others mind over matter is the key to religious and philosophical success whatever you truley believe will be imagination is left up to you to control but the reality and the concept of knowing your own reality sometimes block the things you may see momentarily so the thought disappears you can not touch your mind but you know its there you know its there because you use it but have you really used it the concept of god as an all powerful all knowing being may stimulate the feeling of fear as others would wonder about such a being of such immense portrayal of intelligence you are your own god because you determine whether what you did was justified or not you judge yourself upon what kind of person you believe you are versus the accusations of the other people you talk to god telepathically using your mind to link yourself to god through prayer but its false hope in relaying a message to the non exsistant being that is your own self and relying on covienient coincidence to fufill your request to god as you think of being more financially incline or healthier it boils down to the mind over matter because you truley believe there is a being healing you or helping you you realize how much better you are doign and become optimistic thus realizing you are in a better state of mind mood and your body heals because you control your body and truley you believe you are being healed by a higher power but in all reality you are healing yourself and relying on the coincidence factor you determine your own fate after death through understanding yourself and acheiving greater positive karma thorugh the actions you justify as being good deeds because you are given the opprotunity of free will and the ability to make up your own mind through how you were taught to believe what was righteous and what was wicked thus doing so you create your own personal heaven and when you die you no longer need the physical human body form because your mind is abstract and you to will be an abstract being relying on your thoughts to forever carry you on in however you define yourself in your mind whether it be a positive expeirience or a horrible expeirience is entirley up to you and i believe you will be telepathically linked to everyone thus being all powerful and all knowing as the power of god is mentioned to be knowledge is power and the mind controls everything non physical and since nobody has seen god but imagines god and made his concept a part of our reality we take the idea and make god physical as if he were in fact a real being whatever it is you imagine is real its just the realiy aspect you are taught holds back the image from appearing in a living form but if you were taught there are things other than what you are taught now you would believe them and thus follow your ambition of proving your idea right such as the christians the jews the islamics and the buddhists and so on they all truley believe so abstractally speaking when christians die they will believe they are in heaven if they believe that they were a good person and can dwell on positivethoughts althought they rely on commandments of what they believe to be righteous to justify their actions in either being right or wrong as i justify myself on the reason and consequence of the actions because you cant say killing a serial killing pedophile is wrong if he was raping your brother or sister can you therefore you believe what you did was just but if you just killed him not knowing his story you would believe you were in the wrong and utterly seek consequence subconciesley for your actions through worrying yourself if yuou are damned to this hell people speak of heaven and hell are ideas imagination creates them and the perception is all based on the reality of what you believe is heavenly or hellish you are taught what you know but if you teach yourself who you are you will know more so explore your mind adapt different ways of thinking do not follow what you are told but instead i encourage you to  imagine what you want create it mentally and use it in the dimension you are in until the reality is actuality and actuality is the concept of thought which will e real because its the only eternal matter within you dont believe in a soul because your soul is who you think you are and you think you are with your mind so your mind is your soul and god it is the questions and the answers it is everything and nothing depending on how you use it you can create ideas preceieve them as if they were real and live by your own code of what is right or wrong in the end you will that all comes together and theres nothing you can do once you die but wander in your mind be open minded so you have more places to explore just imagine being close minded and dwelling on repititious fictional concepts of reality when you can be creating your reality with the imagination and ideas that are preceived to be the after life be your own god judge yourself mentally create the path to a heavnly place and be there because nothing is real and nothing is everything you only think its there but if you believe it isnt watch it disappear before your eyes as the horizon of opprotunity unfolds beneath your feet and you enter a place completley built on imagination perception and ideas
preceive what you think
think what you imagine
imagine your ideas
and learn to explore the unknown within and around you

8:39 PM 
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January 23, 2008 - Wednesday 

Current mood:  determined
Category: Life

life comes at you fast especially when your not prepard
sometimes u make bad decisions just because your scared
when you fight with your past you know you wont last
theres more people out to get to get and theyll get you fast

the way u look at things is partially your problems
the hatred and violence isnt the way to solve them

holding in your feelings only makes matters worse
no1 to trust or to run to is an unnatural curse

theres very few people in this world you should trust
the ones you know that care about more than just lust
the ones who uncoditionally love u as a must
you cant do anything to show how theyve changed your life
but show them that you care and forget about your strife

when the world is against your or thats the way you feel
when your only friends are the ones who love to steal
not knowing if your dinner coula been your last meal
the world could end today but would you be ready
are things in your life just not steady
then stay true to the ones who u have already
not everyone is against you but most people are
the ones who dont want u to make it that far
whether the problem be depression or bottled up anger
dont let today be left as a cliffhanger

some things u say dont come out right
somethings u dont mean in the middle of a fight
those things are the things im talking about
the things u say when u just scream and shout

through pain comes gain
and wuts to gain when your going insane

the past is over and the present is now
are you gonna feel the same way in a little while

are you gonna wake up tomorrow better yet with a smile
dont let the past haunt you lay down a new tile
try not to let your feelings stack up in a pile

abused and beaten isnt a way for anyone to be treatin
its just yourself your against wuts the chances of defeatin
you cant fight yourself because youre gonna lose
theres no way to fight it not with pot pills or booze
i know from experience life isnt what you make it
you live for others and life is how u take it
youll never get anywhere trying to fake it
the cycle of loss your not gonna break it

theres always an alternative no matter how you put it
your life might be horrible now but tomorrow could it

youll never know for sure
and for pain theres no cure
when it comes back you may feel insecure
but deep down inside everyones pure

i might be some badass trying to get respect but respect from those who have made nothing of themselves isnt what im abotu anymore.becoming somebody im not because i feel i need to be that way.sometimes im pushed but i dont always have to fall.i can walk away from the edge and save myself from who might catch me.

turning a new page and never rereading the beginning is hard but you can focus more of what comes next.youre life has an alternate ending.you can die happy being who you want to be.or you can die unhappy being who everyone wants you to be.the choice is yours.i decided my fate.i decided who i am and who i can be.nobody knows me.sometimes i dont even know myself.but i am going to make myself out to be.yea.i have that answer.you just sit back .wait.and youll see.



 


 

3:52 AM 
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July 16, 2007 - Monday 

Current mood:lost in thought
if karma was realistic and could be proven in some sort of manner wed all be damned.the average good person everyone thinks is so great and looks up to as a role model would even be condemed in the face of what is righteousness.karma would have to seek revenge on every last human on this planet.you cant tell me that u dont have one person that u think bad thoughts about when u hear his or her name.even thoughts are bad deeds because if you had the chance you most likely turn those thoughts into actions,but it would interfere with your persona as a "good person".i dont like to hate but i do hate the way people act better than others when in fact they are just as bad if not worse.the way they act on the inside doesnt dictate who they are on the inside.doing good deeds physically doesnt add up good karma because your mind has to be right also.i take into example the preacher/pastor whatever u call him or her.while after a sermon on commiting adultery he could be walking to his car and see one of the singers in his choir....she could be hitting on him and he would do anything to go on a date or more with her.but due to his marital status and status in the church he wont no matter how bad he wants to.indeed he would date her and probably alot more.so that good person is probably a good person on the outside and wants to be a good person,but like most people,is corrupt in the mind but unwilling to show it or admit it.my main point in this entire blog is if your going to be a good person make sure your not acting like it because your guilt on your concience will add up and karma will have its effect.if you look up to or admire a certain individual make sure they really are the person they claim to be and dont follow the way they act because in the same way they are messing up in life u could unknowingly be making the same mistakes just  because that person seems so great,they may not be.watch out for yourself and dont get carried away with your thoughts because thoughts become actions sooner or later.you might get away with it but your negative karma will add up.
9:35 AM 
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February 16, 2007 - Friday 

Current mood:  contemplative
Category: Life

ive been thinking alot about things nothing in particular but certain things come to my attention,the all of the sudden large amount of "hardcore white gangsters"i see more and more people wearing bandannas everyday reppin things and being completley oblivious to what "thug life" really means just because we live in a little town doesnt mean there isnt real gangsters and i mean all theese fakes are rediculous.i frown upon gangs i dont think anybody needs a gang.what is a gang?exactly why do people kill eachother over colors of handkercheifs tied around their face?because its cool?i dont think its cool.its not.the nazis being all anti-gang "gangs are for niggers" bullshit is rediculous nazis are gangs 2 i mean u got the A.B.G aryan brotherhood gang...kinda stupid isnt it developing ideas from people u hate.and hate.why do we hate is it jealousy or lack of insight?u decide.back to the gangs.take all the bullets fired and shoot them at an iraqi u wanna kill people because its cool and u want respect join the armed forces respect is earned and your fighting over land that people care about.the kkk.retartded.they dont know who or what they believe in.first their all against blacks then its jews n catholics and then interracial marriage then they claim to be pro-white not anti-black.is there a difference?same with the united negro college fund.if we made a united caucasian college fund or maybe a white entertainment television or blamed black people would we not be racist?religion.everybody has views.dont discriminate on the basis of the rligion aperson chooses to follow.dont press your ideas onto someone.i dont think god is real but someone else might use god as a reason not to drink and be violent.why take that from someone?drugs.marijuana never hurt anyone and never will.if u could buy safe strait priced weed at the store why would u go to some guy on the street and take chances.crime rate would decrease and probably prolong cancer patients life.it does less damage then cigs or booze n both are legal.posers.posers also upset me.not anger wise but because of their inabilty to be comfortable with who they are,not who everyone wants them to be.emo.i dont liek the whole emo idea.i was raised men wear men pants wearin girls pants and makeup and long hair would get u beat up.i mean i say i was raised as if im old but stuff changes real fast.cutting is dumb.some say it helps.i say they should talk to someone.no matter what someone somwhere will listen if u get the courage to talk about it and find that person.authority issues in america are crazy people blaimg bush not knowing half the problem is congress.congress agreed but george bush tricked them mind you.but they also have the power to bring them back home 2 with 3/4 vote.homos.i dont like what they do but im not gonna totally dislike someone because they dont like girls.im just not gonna bend over in front of them or anything lol.my whole point is.open your eyes and look at the big picture of things.find out what your really fighting for.and if its really worth it.dont fall into something because its the cool thing to do and dont believe everything.be yourself.

4:49 AM 
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November 10, 2006 - Friday 

Current mood:  sleepy

"Another day, another way
Another breath, another step closer to death
Learn from my mistakes, don't mind the fakes
Look towards the fun, my times almost done"
"Words aren't anything but the biggest bluff
Don't say it just show it, to prove your tough"
"Enjoy your freedom while you have it, once its gone memories a habit
Profiling police keep your name hot, never take for granted what you got
Even though right now I'm not there, stay outta trouble to show that you care"
"You can't control your past, the memories will last
What you do in the present state, can help decide your fate
Take advantage of the things you get, when its gone don't get upset
Physical things aren't worth your stress or strife
Its whats inside, dignity and pride
Find your inner peace, and let the pain release
Look out for your boys, don't use gurls like toys
Look after your back, for the sneak attack
Let live and let die, when its done don't ask why
Words wont hurt you, only desert you
I've done it all before, had my soul sore
Been mentally abused, beaten and used
Taken, mistaken. Tested, arrested. Tried, cried. Gifted, lifted. Popped, dropped.
Done whats right, won and lost a fight
Tried my best, couldn't take the test
Gave up on it all, risen from the fall
Look at the big picture Not whats best for you, In the moment of chaos you'll know what to do
Demand respect, power to direct
Keep on your feet, Look both ways on the street
Keep your eye out around the turn, or you might get a burn
Until your last breath, don't worry about death
Religion is a big mistery, you'll never know until your history
Lay back and chill, until fate gets the kill
I realize blood isn't family cuz you're my brother
Our brotherly bond shared by no other
Raised different ways, still homies for the rest of our days
Right now we divided, til the sentence decided
It's now getting late, wait til the courtdate"
Derek Sheetz
4:39 AM 
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