Type O Negative

Die with me

Now like a bird
She flew away
To chase her dreams
Of books and praise
Still I miss her
Yeah I miss her
Since she's gone

At JFK
Who played the fool?
Self pity sick
Jet fuel perfume
Still I miss her
Yeah I miss her
Since she's gone

Girl I want to die with you
In each others arms
We'll drown in flame

If this time were the last time
Could I hold you all life long?
Since this time is the last time
Can I hold you all night long?

Lay your head down for the last time

Hey KLM
AT&T
The UK post system
Do you still love me?
Still I miss her
Yeah I miss her
Since she's gone

    I'm sitting in the middle of a city surrounded by over 4.5million people including the outskirts.  All people spending money, generating transactions.

All busy people
Working people, yes even the homeless ask for money. 
Timeless people.

I'm listening to primitive radio gods... standing outside a phonebooth with money in my hand... remember that song?

A year can change your life significantly
A minute can change it equally as much

I want to ask her.  I don't want to move to fast.  I don't want to hurt other people.  I'm tired of watching my life pass me by, but don't know how to step up to the next level... I don't even know where I've positioned myself to be in 1 year.  Is it the way I want to go?  How to I change it if it isn't.  Who can help me?  Who can I help?

the balance between morals and money.

Love and Lust.

Respect and time.

broken and shitty

Let me post some lyrics:

Utopia

Here we stand just inches apart
Can you feel the tension building
With every beat of my heart?

It's hard to control myself
Cause every moment I'm around you
My love starts to swell

I know that I'll be alright
Cause you're here with me tonight

To be my utopia
Be my one true love
Cause it's heaven on earth
in your arms with you girl and I'll never let you go

In the darkness all I see are your eyes
And the mysteries and beauty
That they hide

Cause they shine like the stars in the sky
like a brand new constillation
and it's only mine

And I know that I'll be alright
Cause you're here with me tonight

To be my utopia
be my one true love
cause it's heaven on earth
in your arms with you girl
and I'll never let you go

When I see you baby
I'm proud to say you're mind
I want to hold you close
until the end of time

to be my utopia
be my one true love
cause it's heaven on earth
in your arms with you girl
and I'll never let you go

I've considered removing this myspace.  but sometimes i feel so dirty, i don't know where else to go.  I can't let it go.  I want to but I can't.  I is part of me, all I wonder is why i would be made this way.  Everyone has an angry ghost.  I don't want mine to takeover.  I'm all talk no action, so you have nothing to worry about....  It will be here. 

Ok,

I think it's about time someone just came out and wrote a song called "I want to fuck you for christmas".

Baby it's cold outide,
We're filled with wine
Too drunk to drive,
The snow's too high

The fire's hot
I've got a hard cock
let's hang our sock,
and do the santa clause rock.

I want to fuck you for christmas

to be continued....

    I'm lying on my back the crossways on my bed when i see the cigarette burn flash in the top right corner of my right eye.  I wait for the scene to change but nothing happens... my existance is locked at the end of a frame.

eagerly anticipating, concerned with what will be fed into me next.  waiting to be fed.  so I can continue feeding the machine that generated what other beings open their mouth to tell me is my soul.  Should I listen?  To these sounds generated by other organic beings who are capable of the deceit we see every day.  It's beyond the confines of my skull. 

The problem with language, is that you can't willingly un-learn it.  We live within the confines of our language.  What happens if everything we are searching for cannot be defined by verbal communication? 
IE: When we hear something we understand we absorb it it's what we were trained to do.  We can't then unhear it, it influences us.  When you hear somone speaking a foreign language it is will have no influence on you the message will be lost upon you as a human being. 

Our languages and senses have been designed to to accomodate survival on this planet. 

Is the wall guarding us from pure pleasure so powerful that the existance of an entire population can be so miserable?  Every Man for himself, every soul up for auction between the ominous.  where's the line?

Maybe it's in the toothpaste?  Kurt cobain didn't brush his teeth, did he know something we didn't?  Not likely?  he died rich yet still miserable.  He knew that every American could relate cause there are a lot of people busy being miserable.

We have generated an angry ghost.

        Do you ever feel them?
the tickle on the back of your head
the poke on your shoulder
the glimps in the mirror
the aura of something greater overshadowed by the bars of the cage you're stuck behind.

Are You Free?

Are you reading?

did you choose to read, or were you fed by the hand of fate?

fuk it.

Kurdt Cobain?
guided by the hands of time to suicide?
thank you religion for promoting distruction instead of connection, if it is the will of such a beast, to disguise war as a fight for peace
god is misused and misunderstood.

No one understands, no one really ever understands.
instead of shaking hands, we sever them, believing the eternal power struggle is worth it.

   

Are you Lost?
do you accept the realities as they are
the books that feed
the greed that decieves
the joy you recieve?

what does it belong to?
what does it have to do with you?
are you really touching your your plastic controlling device?
what images flash through your mind
WHY DO WE DENY PLEASURE?
Why do we withhold our feelings?
we CAN communicate, yet we choose not to
without parameteres, is without living
What's poison to some, is life for others
struggle, powertrip, ignorance
communication
Talk
Listen

Maybe humans are haunting ghosts... who knows, it's all how the beholder percieves it.  Ghosts can be haunted too as I've been 'haunted' by my past by going through some songs I've recorded in rough stages over the years.  I have uh hum:  55 songs that were recorded over a year ago and have done MORE since then at least 10....  It's bizarre listening to something that was so important to me years later, it feels so long ago some I know date back to 2002 and probably earlier... CRAZY.

In conclusion...

UP UP UP.

tURN OFF THE TV

cLOSE YOUR EYES

fEEL IT CRAWL UP YOUR SPINE.

thRUST YOUR HEAD BACK IN PLEASURE AS IT ENTERS YOU.

lET IT BREATHE INSIDE THE LUNG OF THE BEAST.

tASte THE CANDY OF BEAUTY

tHEN FILL THE CAVITY

tICKELING YOUR EAR

tINGELING IN FEAR

YOU LOVE IT

YOU FEED IT

YOU EAT IT

OPEN YOUR EYES

dream about all the things. hiding beneath the sheets, walking clothed in streets. sucking life to the powers that feed.

do you believe in the angry ghost?

Ok enjoy, rock and roll baby. it's Pin UP Girl.  fell off the wall and landed in your bed.