Lately I’ve become more interested in photography.  The dark side of it is I’m finding myself in front of the camera some rather than behind it.  So here’s a few things I learned last night while being involved in some pictures.

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1)      Pants are apparently not considered optional even if you are only being shot from the waist up.

2)      Wax is fucking messy even if you aren’t drizzling it over naked bodies.  Therefore I will never play with wax again unless naked or at least scantily clad women are involved.  Otherwise it’s not worth it.

3)      30 pieces of silver aren’t what they use to be but two rolls of quarters and dimes can be gotten from the local mega mart if needed to beef things up

4)      You can leave the wine in front of me and I won’t bother it but put shots of Lorihana within reach and I dare you to try to keep the glass filled.

5)      Not everyone thinks slipping a big pink vibrator into a bunch of the pictures was funny.  Personally I thought it added a nice whimsical touch.

6)      The use of an Apple has different meaning to different people & probably

        needs explained.  The Pagans & Wiccans used it as a symbol of fertility or of a goddess.  Christians tie it to “original sin” and to me it represents temptation.  After explaining the history violently sinking a dagger into it intending to symbolize the death of innocence might require further explanation.

7)      You can show up with 500 feet of rope, a bull whip, clothespins, Proust novel, black leather pants,  and a dagger but no one will blink an eye.   However if you pull out a battle ax everybody freaks out.

8)      Cardio is really bad for the size of my biceps.  I need to begin praying to the iron gods again if there is any intention of keeping this up.

9)      Not all candles are created equal, plus there are some very funky scents out there which is only magnified when you get about 7 different ones going at the same time.  Opening the window just messes with the flames and one should not throw his head back while doing shots if the buffet behind them is lined with 12 little fires.

10)   Even the supposedly Nilla photographer wants to know what the rabbit hair flogger feels like.  I just laughed and told her that’s how it all starts next thing you know she’ll have pierced nipples , be chained to a wall at a public dungeon and will be asking a guy she doesn't know to whip her harder with a dragon’s tail.

Eventually some of the less censored picture may show up else where but these are more or less my spaz appropriate,

Mal

Here's the loosely based script from last night's time with miss Victoria.  The Podcast is available in the pickle player above, in i tunes or at http://malflic.libsyn.com & worth a listen since we had a fun time carrying on as much as anything. There are parts of the show I didn't even try to type out.

Show Notes....

In this Episode Malfic cavorts shamelessly with one of his favorite Mistresses, the Sultry Little Viking Mistress Victoria Christiansen.  Who he insists on calling Miss Victoria.  The recording took place on a Friday night and in between the back and forth verbal jousting that is as insightful as anything he tells the story not only of his friendship with Victoria & their relationship but the impact it has on one of her  lovers.

As always it’s loaded with the request amount of dirty words and innuendo laden dialog the show breaks rank from being heavily scripted to a real conversation and back again all while poking fun at Malflic as he laughs along with that dirty little chuckle of his at the insane lifestyle choices he’s made.

To read his other works visit malflic.com, to follow him, listen in on semi private conversations, or just to hear him rant and profess his undying love for coffee check him out on twitter.

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  Victoria....

Welcome to Malflic’s Exercising my Demons.  I’m Mistress Victoria unless you know who is involved because  something in his vocabulary forbids him to use the word mistress and if you want to shut him down completely try calling him master.    Seriously it’s the BDSM equivalent of Whisky Dick, he just quits working right then and there.   Despite that I’ll be your host today as we explore Malflic’s Unique relationship with me and his over whelming desire to simply fuck with people;  just for the hell of it;  Even if it’s one of my own play things.  

Sure he’s got a hang up on titles but other than that he really is a twisted sick soul who truly revels in other people’s discomfort and pain simply for his own amusement.  Not that I’d know anything about that personally.  (Bratty) Talk about Masochsim…The Chesty Blonde has been with him for nearly 20 years.  Let’s see all you edge players try to do that!  It makes breath & fire play seem like going down a playground’s toddler slide on a sunny spring afternoon at the local park.

So sit back, relax, let your imagination run wild…as Mal tells his version of the story of playing with one of my playthings. And so we begin.

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Malflic....

  Victoria Christiansen is one of my closest friends in the world.  Above all else she also might just be the woman I share the most unique relation with.  We’re both huge literary whores, borderline or full fledged deviants depending on the topic at hand and I can only imagine her drive for carnal desire pretty much closely mirrors mine.  A man has to adore a strong willed, saucy little defiant Viking after all.

 Most years I spend more time talking with her than I do with the blonde and she’s always in the middle of some great adventure which keeps our conversation content fresh and interesting.  I’ve asked her to do some things that I’ve never asked another soul to do…truly dark and pain filled thing like proof reading volumes of text of my first draft deranged text.  Talk about an exercise in true masochism.  Try being the test read for 150,000 of my unedited words penned during various states of sanity.

To put a very fine point on it if I actually got off my ass and was going to Shibaricon or BMSL but the Chesty Blonde wasn’t going with me or we wanted another friend along for the festivities Miss Victoria would be the first in line.  I know this because she’s told me so several times.  I like to think she might have to fight a bit for that first spot; however that could just be ego on my part.   Besides the more the merrier.  Every time I catch an event that mirrors her travel schedule I call her to let her know. We talk about things most people wouldn’t discuss at all with their best friend, priest, or shrink let alone casually in mixed company.

Recently I was asked to show up at a private party to read a few of my erotic works, tie a knot or two, smack a few asses and tweak some nipples.  Clothes pins and clamps anyone?   I didn’t go down quite that way but was close.

She was the first person I called to tell about it.  Victoria’s the one who helped me decide what I would read, BTW 118 Seconds of Bliss, Do you Like to watch? an Interlude with a Masichist, and a few chapters from my book.  

She was the safe call when I arrived & left to let her know I had not been abducted by anyone and nothing freakier than could be expected had occurred.  Before you get any idea this in not a story about me trying become a public rigger.   There are a lot of people with great skills who do that already.  I’m not one of those.  My play is with friends in private so this was a special treat for me.

Bondage to me is as more about art, energy, and imagery more than sex…with exceptions of course.   Sometime the rope is all about sex…ok sometimes its also about pain…but not always.  Sometimes it’s about power but most often and increasingly it’s about the imagery and potential pictures it might produce. Well in any case when it’s not about sex.

So imagine you have a relationship similar to what I described but instead of being me you’re her.  Now you have to explain not only who I am to a new person in your life but a host of other things including why you were “playing” with that other person, why I keep calling at all hours of the night, the number of times you’ve been to said couple’s home for a weekend.  Even detailing some of my relationships with others she’d come to know or be very aware of.   Most people would have done so delicately, with a tentative and warm heart worrying about how the other might perceive them . Instead though one day when the light finally went on in her play things head it was time to add a sadistic streak to a somewhat more traditionally minded male, a very sick sense of humor, and a healthy does of Miss Victoria.

You see I believe that she has strong switch tendencies.  In most places I’ve seen her she’s definitely the one calling the shots but when it comes to me she’s enjoyed playing the role of the wicked little brat.  Who am I to question relationship dynamics? It works pretty fucking well for me so I’m certainly not complaining.  Still she does like her boys kind of big, rough, and capable of an orgasmically good mind fuck.

So it’s a quiet evening at an exclusive restaurant when the topic of moi came up.  Over a lovely candle lit dinner on a romantic night between two lovers is exactly where you’d never expect me to be the topic.  What I do and discuss isn’t exactly most people’s idea of good stimulating conversation uless its not the brain you’re interested in stimulating then I’m your man.   Talking about your unique relationship with me is  the dating equivalent of going to see Fatal Attraction on a first date.  Which I was actually stupid enough to do once upon a time.  She picked the movie and my dick when nowhere near any part of that little tart.    Victoria continued the conversation  as she explained who I was, some of my proclivities if you will.   It was the first time the light really went on that the guy across the table wasn’t exactly hearing about some random boy next door type she knew but rather someone who was much darker.

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Most Men are really timid creatures, few live boldly, even fewer can walk the walk.  So she suggested he go read a few things and listen to the bits we’ve done together.

Since the topic is Miss Victoria and well it’s a Friday night and the naked nurse hasn’t started her shenanigans yet now’s a great time to get to know my dear friend Victoria a little better.

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 Malflic goes off script and asks Victoria about a few random things....

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Resume Story....

Mal- That was very insightful.  Rock n Roll isn’t the work of the devil the internet is.  I can prove it you’re listening to this smut right now and wondering why your kitty is wet or you have a boner.  Fucking pervert!  Now back to my version of things.

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Mal You see I’m not one of the possessive types.   I’m sort of like a magician pulling random rabbits out of my hat to amuse myself at any given moment.  Abracadabra a bouquet of flowers. Poof a quarter disappears.   After all I do have a thing for bunnies of all flavors, particularly milk chocolate and bondage.  Even the Marge Simpson centerfold in Playboy held some kind of strange appeal and I’ve never even gotten to first base with a cartoon character.  Though some one sent me a lovely wonder woman picture recently that made me have some of those thoughts.

Victoria’s So as my play thing start to get nervous he starts asking when this all began.   Jesus Malflic is usually dressed as slick as the devil stands 5”10”, weighs in at 225 pounds and is damn proud of it.  So it’s not like he just appeared out of thin air but my play thing is very inquisitive about Mal and asks the requisite questions like

 Is he a convicted felon (No)

Is he  a serial anarchist? (No)

Doe his wife know about all of this?  (of course) I tell him oh she’s The Chesty Blonde.  Then I showed him a few pictures that answered that one pretty simply.

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Is he hung like a stallion?  Of course isn’t that the question so many people really want answered.  Give you a hint girls.  I know the answer…and I’m not telling.

Still my Plaything was worried he asked about slight of hand and is it all just an act (no).  Do you think anyone can really talk about this stuff like he does and not be into it.

Mal - Some Guys know sports stats, scripture or history. Me I know Smut & Sex.  I’m a student of those topics.  It comes natural and might be my greatest gift in life. I haven’t gotten a lot of complaints over the years.  Tons of requests, a few complaints.  Mostly things like, Hey get off my hair although Janet said my sexual appetite was average.  That might have been a complaint because based on what I know it sure as hell wasn’t a statement of fact.  There was the one time the a woman figured out her room mate was fucking the same guy…me!  I guess that one could be called a complaint among other things.

Victoria –Ok are you finished?

Mal-Maybe

Victoria- Here’s a deep dark secret of his if you’ve scene’d with the man he does become the role and despite the image he is a twisted as can be he’s got a really big ……(long pause)  soft side.  He is really sweet even with a flogger in his hand. 

Mal-Smart Ass.  That’s going to cost you!....

Victoria – Lemon Meringue Pie!

Mal-Oh so you wait all these years to finally pull that one out!....

Victoria -lemon meringue pie his default choice for safe words.  Which despite probably having some deep seeded horribly disturbed meaning I don’t care to know about also eliminates that particular dessert from any food play I suppose.

Mal- I’m not really into food play, a little chocolate sauce, some whipped cream, some Vanilla ice cream on the nipples from time to time and flavored body paints.   Besides we’re not playing we’re talking it doesn’t count. You can only use a safe word during a scene not a conversation outside of a scene.

Victoria- oh really! Just like a top, changing the rules just to get your way.  What are you going to do to me? Give me every dirty little detail.  Better yet show me.   I do have a few idea’s if you’re lacking any.

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(insert15 second musical interlude with sound effects)

Victoria Umm yep no safe words were needed for that.  So Back to our story.  About three days later I mention to him in one of our stupidly late, extremely long, I like things that are extremely long, conversations that my play thing was going to be appearing in a particular city.

Mal-  It just so happens that I’ll be leaving that same city that very day.  I see the infinite possibilities. Immediately!  I know about this poor mystical friend of her.  I know that he was recently uncomfortable with the thought of me and I’m faced with a few options.  Let it slide, not a chance in hell.   Meet him and make him feel all safe and nice and secure.   Yeah not exactly what I’m in the mood for.  I fuck with people for fun and profit and this was my idea of a bonus version of fun time for the week.  After all it was going to be nothing more than a meet and greet and little chat if I had my way.

I had my own list of questions and none of them.  OK almost none of them had anything to do with other people’s relationships.  Sadly it didn’t work out.  Sure Victoria called her little play thing to find out what time he would be arriving, where he would be going etc and as usual my schedule was completely fubar’ed.  So we didn’t get to meet.   I thought of walking though the airport and calling out his name. 

Really call out some ones name and even if they don’t know you they stop and look.   Can you see it now my wing tip wearing pin stripe suit clad ass walking through a huge airport calling out the name of a person I’d never met or spoken to just to see if I could make them pull a Houdini and appear out of thin air all for my amusement and so I could torment the poor soul for a few passing seconds.  Well its not a traditional for of sadism but it would work in a pinch. 

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Instead I went trolling through the airport to my gate passing by hundreds of nameless faces.  I got on my plane and there it was decked out in blue synthetic fabric.  A beautiful, young flight attendant.  I was certain I had died,  She had big full bright pink lips, about a c cup, tiny little waist dangerously curved hips and full firm heart shaped ass.  

Suddenly all thoughts of Miss Victoria’s plaything were lost until tonight.

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Outro Victoria  And there  you have it folks what a group of kinksters do on a Friday night.  They find people to play with.  We hope you’re lucky enough to do the same!  This has been exercising my demons.  If you like what you’ve heard be sure to subscribe we’re in all of your favorite podcast directories and even I tunes where you’ll find us listed in the podcast directory under Malflic.  Have a show idea or something you’d like to tell us?   Send us an email at show@malflic.com   Do us a favor and digg & link your little hearts out and tell all your friends about us.  We really do appreciate it. 

And don’t forget Mal is also on twitter babbling incessantly not so much about sex but the more amusing mundane events of his day.  Coffee tends to be one of his favorite morning topics.  Next time on here the topic will be an exploration that included the Chesty Blonde titled Rope Bondage Hemp vs. MFP.

Mike where the fuck do you come up with this shit?  Really? You’re doing a “semi scientific show about different types of rope?”  Go head start a holy war why don’t you.  It’s like bringing up religion or politics!

Yes I know know you make fun of those things all the time!  Well on that note its time for me to go.  This is Mistress Victoria, and I’ve enjoyed playing with you tonight.

Now where is that little subbie boy I brought with me? I need a drink.....

Halloween Spooktacular

So what are you waiting  go listen to it already!!!  You know the drill its in the podcast player above.  It'll be 20 of the best non battery operated non naked minutes all weekend long.  Or you can find me on itunes under podcasts and down load it there.  Nothing better than being able to go every where with me right?

Show Notes

Our Story begins on stormy night in an ancestral family home.  Every family has its secrets, things that are only spoken about in whispers if at all.  Diva senses something is not quite right as she begrudgingly gets ready for a Halloween party.  Somewhere between a few quiet moments and a wicked storm all hell breaks loose…

No Kidding this one is really Rated PG and Family Friendly.   Oh it’s sick but not a sick joke as Malflic takes a turn telling scary stories about things that go bump in the night all in the name of a little Halloween fun. The narration and female leads characters are voiced by his own daughters Diva & Lilly (who this week decided she wanted to now be called by her middle name Kayliegh).  So…moving right along.

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AS always you can find out more about the author at malflic.com where you’ll find his first adult oriented Novel  “ It had Been Years” available for free.

This episode is a based on “Dances in The Shadows” A Fictional Story by Michael Malflic

Cast

Malflic – Host, Mark, Male Chanting

Kayleigh Malflic – Narrator

Diva Malflic – Diva & Creature

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All Music and Sound Effects were Digital Juice Royalty Free Products.

Recorded on Sony Acid Software with Alesis Equipment and  MXL Mics

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Episode Photo “Summer Moon on a Cloudy Night” Copyright 2009 Diva Malflic

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“Dances in the Shadows” Script

Malflic

 Welcome to the Exercising My Demons Halloween Spooktackular.  As always I’m your host Malflic. Today you’re joining us during the time of year where the modern world celebrates; or fears the dead honoring ancient pagan customs, and perhaps even the bravest of souls worry just a little bit more about what evils is out there lurking in the night.  Ghosts, spirits, vampires and perhaps the most terrifying of all political candidates and social activists who are roaming the world with nefarious intentions.   God only knows how much sleep I’ve lost worrying about those demented beings showing up at my door.   For most of us though it’s the time of year where seemingly normal people dress up  as hideous monsters, as angels, and demons and dress as sexy creatures in exotic costumes outside of the bed room.    Which is nice since it makes it that much easier for the Goth kids to go out and not be viewed as Satanist freaks and real demons to roam around unnoticed.      Seeing as I like the shadows and have met many of the most interesting people in them that’s out topic for today.   With that in mind, In the name of all that is unholy, undead, and downright terrifying sit back relax let you imagination run wild and so we begin…. Dances in the shadows

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Narrator  ....

It was a moonless night.  The kind of night where the sun gives way to total darkness just a little too quickly and the moon has all but ceased to exist.  The kind of twilight where stars don’t dare to shine, not even a little and in the dead of night.  No matter how dark it is at any given moment there are shadows lurking not that far away that are even darker.   The house had a chill to it that meant the end of summer had most certainly given way to fall.   The tree outside had shed its leaves and the bare branches cast unrelenting images of boney hands the house’s large ancient windows.

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(The Phone rings)....

Diva: ....

Hello.  (pause)

I just walked in and haven’t even started to get ready yet. 

(disgusted)  It’ll be at least an hour.

Besides when was last time I wasn’t fashionably late.

So what are you wearing?

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I  don’t know Costume parties always have a way of being so lame.

OK, OK…I’ll be festive just for you.

Narrator

As Diva rattled alone though the big old house, down into the basement and back up carrying a bag filled with out of style clothes and remnants of costumes of year past.  She threw them into a heap on the couch. 

Picking out an outfit that reminded her of her first grade teacher

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Diva

I’ve got it! (Excited tone)

I’ll come as a witch disguised as a teacher.

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Narrator

It was an inside joke.  Even now she wasn’t convinced that her first grade teacher didn’t roam the night on a broom stick.  In truth it was a fair question considering how miserable the woman still was.

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Diva

Fine I’ll hurry.

No you’ll just have to guess which one me when people arrive.  And I’d better not find you frolicking with any woodland creatures when I get there!

I told you.  It’ll be a surprise…but I promise you’ll like it.

Narrator

That was it the conversation was over; no fare wells no good byes.   Soon after diva discarded her phone and purse, and she danced through the shadows.  Up the old stairs that creaked and moaned with her every step, pausing  momentarily on the landing to adjust the thermostat in hopes of taking the chill out of the air.

Diva;

Ahh.  This damn place.  Too hot in the summer, freezing cold in the winter and too far from everything.

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Narrator: the furnace bellowed forcing gust of tepid air through the cold metal pipes and up through the floor registers. Just then a shadow in the foyer seemed to move and caught her eye

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Diva;  Gasp…(in a tentative voice) Hello? is anybody there?

Narrator ;  but the wind just howled, and the creaks of the furnace in the old house filled the silenece while the ancient oak on the front lawn lurched ominously forward toward the house.  Diva spoke out loud to comfort herself.

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Diva:  It almost looks as if the tree was dancing. It looked like it was dancing just like I had been in the hall way.  Oh it couldn’t be.

Narrator  You see it’s the things one never considers that haunts them the most.  So while she drew her bath, the wild winds howled.   As she sat in the candle light not actually intending to hurry the tree outside continued to sway and dance. 

Then it happened.

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Diva  Door!  (Startled voice) Hello?

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Narrator: then she heard (insert foot steps) ....

Her mind had a way of playing tricks on her. 

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Diva:  Maybe if I hurry I won’t be late.

Male: / Narrator:  Time is nothing she had ever stopped to consider.  Its relentless never ending march forward. Dive scurried quickly down the stairs. Redialed the phone. The plan was to expedite the time line.  She hurried into a dress.   Pulled her hair back, and slipped into to her highest heels.  The all night drug store would offer her a chance to pick up a halo and wings on the way and there you have it an instant angel.

Narrator:  Suddenly Diva had no desire to be alone.  It was one of those moments when her mind was playing tricks on her.

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Diva:   it feels like some one is watching me.

Narrator she said to herself as she waited for an answer.  She dialed her Phone

Phone Voice mail....

You’ve reached Mark….I’m off doing I probably shouldn’t be so leave a message and I’ll ring you back.

Diva:   (angry) Mark You jerk!   I knew you wouldn’t answer the damn phone.  Look I’m leaving now and should be there in about 20 minutes.  Call me back as soon as you get this. 

And quit laughing because I’m serious and on my way

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Narrator:  (read slowly) The shadows moved. Diva Gasped and then stood perfectly still.  The floor creaked again.  (tensely/nervous) She knew that noise.  It was the same one the floor made when she walked over it.  (normal voice) The house had been in the family for years. But it had always been rented out until she moved in. 

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Diva;  (Scared) Who there?  God Damn it I can see you moving!

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Narrator: (Slowly) But on one answered back.  Instead the wind just howled (3 second pause) and the rain threw itself violently against the house.  Diva grabbed her hat and she grabbed her coat and she ran out into the street.  She could feel someone following her.  It was like the old tree was bending over to grab her as she went past. 

Diva;   Soaked! I’m so glad the car has heated seats.

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Narrator:  Once she was sure she wasn’t followed.  The very second she was convinced that it was only her mind and that nothing was after her Diva made her way to the car. 

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Diva:  (Humming a tune)

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Narrator:  Feeling more like herself again Diva Sung and Danced in the rain.  The old tree towered over head with branches swaying in the wind and moving eerily along with her as she made her way past the side of the house.   To the back, care free.

She started her car. (5 second pause)

Threw it into reverse and then pulled back toward the street. (slowly) That’s when her mind started .

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Diva:  Insert a long Gasp

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Narrator: (Quickly/ Startled) She thought she saw an old woman…(Pause/ Slowly) dancing naked in the rain.  Skinny, hunched over and skeletal.  (pause)  Diva’s eyes darted to the house, and then the street.  (pause/ slowly) Senses tingling. (pause/ Quickly) Heart Racing!

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The she saw it a branch that had fallen from the old tree.  It was there in the middle of the driveway.   Once again she found herself outside the car. Standing in the rain.

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Diva:  At least I’m not wearing any make up for this monsoon to smear.   Wretched old wood.

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Narrator: she said as approaching the fallen branch. (Pause/Errily ) A branch stuck out like an out stretched arm.  The bark was bare and rotted.  To Diva it felt like she was grabbing a dead hand. 

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She Felt Weak, as she pulled it to the edge of the driveway.

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Her very being began to wither, her face became tired and drawn.  Soon she could barely stand. And as she slumped to the ground, falling into a small hole in the edge of the garden the branch wrapped itself around Diva.  (pause) and with a might shove hurled her into the garden.

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Creature;  Now who is wretched old wood? (insert a demented shriek and an evil laugh)      Of course you danced so beautifully.  But now I’ll be the one that is dancing.

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Narrator:     The branch now stood there in the rain.  Now longer withered (pause), no longer twisted or wretched rather a woman stood there glowing like an angel in a silvery white dress long Curly hair and a radiant and obviously evil smile. 

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Creature;  Do like my face?

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Narrator: She cackled watching the last glimmer of life leaving Diva’s blue eyes. The Creature kicked dirt over what had been Diva’s body but now looked like like a broken sapling with a tuft of overgrown crab grass.

Creature   You always looked so much like me.  Even as a child.  I’d watch you play,  so young so full of life.  A life that I had every intention of having once again for myself.

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Narrator;  Diva couldn’t move she felt like stone, but she could still hear her own thoughts.  She remembered her grandmother telling tales of the old tree out front and how it was as much a part of Diva’s family as she was.

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Creature:  Let’s hope for your sake that Mark really does fancy a few woodland creatures.  

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Narrator:  And with that she drove off (pause) disappearing like a ghost into the night.  The image of the woman’s face still swimming in Diva’s head as she laid there not certain what had become of her or why she couldn’t move.  Except with the wind.

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 Soon after the Shimmering creature that had left Diva arrived where Mark was.  She followed the sensation of his very being to find him.  Stepping out of the car and entering the build her Soft white dress and black boots glistened in the emerging moon light.

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Mark: Look at her.   She’s glowing, literally her skin is shimmering.

Narrator:  If only he had known what he was saying.  Perhaps he would have thought twice.  But no he found her intoxicating as she dance across the room toward him.

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Mark: You got here quicker than I imagined.

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Creature:  (Coyly) It felt like an eternity.

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Mark:  By anyone’s standards you’re early.

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Creature:  (speaking out loud but mainly to herself) You have no idea what an eternity is.  Well at least not yet.  This is a night where sick thing are lurking in the shadows.   Dark things you have not yet even begun to imagine are lurking in the night.  Waiting for you. 

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Mark:  There is something so different about you tonight Diva.

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Creature:  Yes something beautiful and deranged.  Something ancient and mystical.  Magic is floating in the night.  (teasingly) and the magic you can all most taste it.

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Mark:  actually I was thinking you might have had a few drinks already since you weren’t so uptight but sure magic.  After all it’s Halloween.

OK go ahead and dance just leave me here

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Narrator; and the person thought to be Diva did.  She slid into the crowd, she danced perfectly the entire night. Skin shimmering, dress float like a ghost.  And everyone was watching her.  The night was hers and only hers.  As 11:00 drew near she began to gather an assortment of women dressed as fairies, and witches.  Inviting them all to leave with her and come to party that would end all parties.

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Creature:  There will be Dancing and music.  Food and Drinks and when the moon is just right and the shadows have cast themselves perfectly against the time that has passed and the eternity that remains you will see sights like never before.

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Narrator

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So despite the odd invitation and XX that had made Diva seem not quite like her self they followed. And as promised the house was filled with music, the bodies and souls of her guests undulated with reckless abandon.   The Old Oak outside swayed in the winds casting its shadow through the windows. Across the street . 

.. ..

Narrator

By then the rain had long since stopped by  The Party Raged on.   Until in unison with the shadows of the moonlight Celestial music floating through the air she ran outside. 

.. ..

Creature: They’re here!

.. ..

Insert chanting

.. ..

Everyone come outside its time, its time its finally time.  All of you fairies, and witches the magic is upon us

.. ..

Narrator:  (slowly) There were 13 men in long brown robes gathered around the tree.  It seemed that they were singing but no one could understand their enchanting words.   The tree still swayed with the music even through the wind had died completely.

.. ..

(Deep scary voice)  That’s when it happened.

.. ..

.. ..

.. ..

.. ..

Creature 

(Almost in an evil nurse rhyme Voice)

The Chants The chants

We call out her name

From stone to flesh

I’m man again

And woman comes from barren wood

When she’s back to life where all is good

So give you souls and grant her your youth

Because while stone is forever her bones seek the truth

So Glisten in moon light skin so devine

She now lives eternal and sadly its time

To turn you  to the things she is when she sleeps

Just a twisted old branch that is part of the tree

A witch a witch

Dances on air

Across the moonlight

Oh children beware

.. ..

A turn of fate, a twisted truth

On a dark night when you danced in the rain

Her blood did flow is the young girls veins

Near an old tree in the wind who moved when  it swayed.

She dance s again, like death in the night

And everything wrong and it just feels so right.

Narrator

The Branches fell from the trees on the party guests.  They grabbed them draining their life and their beauty and their youth.  The fallen branches that at first seemed like noting more than twisted old wood slowly became came human twisted wretched old women, emancipated, sullen with starvation  drawn cheeks.

.. ..

Narrator: The longer they held their prey the transformed into shining creatures with angelic shimmering skin that glowed.  Soft white gowns and shiny black boots that glistened in the moon light more with each prolonged touch that drained the very life out of their victims.

.. ..

The creatures now dancing in the night over what was now just dead wooden braches.

.. ..

All the while the woman thought to be Diva held Mark to the ground with the strength of 1000 men.

Narrator

Dragging him across the drive way like a rag doll. Pushing his hand against the Branch where the real Diva sat motionless trapped in her own thoughts and screaming silently in horror.  The creature was ravishing as she trust Mark against the branches of the sapling shape.

.. ..

Slow Diva regained her shape and then the creature spoke.

.. ..

Creature: (gently and grandmotherly)  You always were such a lovely Girl but such a hideous look you’re giving me.  My Dear you weren’t there that long to be so upset.   Do you recognize me?   Still speechless I see.  Well You do have my face I’m your great grandmother’s, great, great grand mother Nadiusehenka.  Welcome to your family’s  Coven.  We’ve been waiting out there for you  for so long.

.. ..

(Indifferent / cold)  Yes, about that your friends well they are all VERY dead

.. ..

.. ..

Narrator   So remember next time you’re out on a cold, rainy or moonless night. There just might be something lurking in those shadows waiting for you.  On a night where the wind howls and the rain falls down in buckets and the shadows dance  you might not want to dance with them.  After all its an invitation for them to join you and unless its your ancestors (long pause. Scary voice) it might not end well for you personally.

.. ..

.. ..

Outro....

As always Thanks for listening to Exercising my Demons.  I know this episode was very different from our standard fare but if nothing else it was a first and I personally hope you truly enjoyed it.    I’d like to extend my special thanks to our Narrator today Lilith Kayliegh Malflic and Diva Malflic who played herself and the creature. 

Some people are just holiday people.  Well when your soul is a little bit tainted what better holiday to love than Halloween.  After all it was 17 years ago this Halloween that the Blonde and I officially entered into our unholy union.   I think the two of us are the only ones who thought it would last.  Fortunately we’re the only ones who were right.

So as we celebrate the pagan holiday of my anniversary.  Take a little candy from strangers, trick or treat and drive safely and of course think twice when walking alone in the night especially if you’re  by a bare twisted  old tree. 

I've come out of the closet and decided to return to both writing and of all things podcasting.  Below is the script for the return broad cast. some of it is new and some of it isn't.   We never re wrote the incapacitated Blonde's lines after the great ankle debacle of 2009.

The Audio is available in the snazzy red pickle player above.

Show Notes

The return to podcasting after a very long break Malflic, The Chesty Blonde and an assortment of friends are back to catch up on the life and times of just another set of suburbanite kinksters, their stories, lives and an explanation of the hiatus.  Plus a reading of Malflic’s Short Story Bunnies and why I kind of hate holidays that explores why bringing him home to meet the family might not be his kind of thing.

Script....

Intro....

You’re listening to exercising my demons if you’re under 18, or live in sexually repressed area where discussions of a frank and sexual nature are prohibited then please leave now,  move, get off your high horse, or pull the giant stick out of your ass.  Other wise enjoy.

The Chesty Blonde

Did you miss us?   We certainly hope so but even if you didn’t we’re back so tough shit.   For those of you who did, we missed you too!  You can still find us at show@malflic.com.   

Before we officially get started here’s a brief lame explanation for the hiatus. 

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.. ..

MALFLIC             

On occasion I have a bad habit of disappearing into the night.  I wish I could say I was away at an 18 month intensive bondage class, was off inventing invisible rope like wonder woman  would use or something cool like that.  But I wasn’t.   Sure I would have loved to have been the only man stranded at a swingers convention surrounded by hundreds of morally questionable women, or to have finally broken in to the adult film industry as the first short fat guy other than Ron Jeremy.  But I didn’t.  Ok so I didn’t even try.  Disappearing into the night is actually its one of the things I do best in life, the truth is I had very little to say.  Well at least on the kink front of things. It was so bad that I wasn’t even talking dirty to random strangers just for the hell of it.  Instead I considered living a more normal life, the economic state which truly caused me great pain since.   The free market system is really the only thing I ever really believed in.  When it fell apart I started questioning a lot of stuff…like.  Is capitalism bull shit?  Is our country now really a socialist state?   Why can’t I get a decent porno at the local adult book stores around here? And should I just give it all up…shine my shoes and not my boots and get down to a normal “healthy view of life, relationships and sexuality.   I took a long hard look at the politics of conservatism and change going on around us in the country and gave serious thought to playing in that world.  It made me sick.  I lost sleep over the entire thing.

.. ..

People use to say that something would drive them to drink.  Being the untraditional guy that I am I went the other way and quite drinking for the most part.  I quit a lot of things…some good some not so good. 

Then I simply said fuck it.  I’m old and apathetic.  I hate political bullshit but the way I see it both sides are on a slippery slope to hell and not listening to the citizens.   Health care reform my ass.  When they start lining up the special interest guys, trial lawyers and big pharma along with the other problem children the others then I’ll get on board.  I kinda dig the whole sarcastic prick  commentator bit and if all both sides are spinning is bull shit then while you might not see me at a tea party any time soon if they start hosting vodka parties, leather nights or XX I’m so there.   So fuck it do what you know.   With that this will now be a mix of my life and times like it has been in the past, a few fictional stories here and there, a little tongue in cheek social commentary mixed with irreverent political humor little more often.  And now I’d like to return you to your regularly schedules dose of smut, sin, and rough sex.

.. ..

The Chesty Blonde

What can I say?  Only when it comes to Malflic the ropes aren’t the only thing that’s a little twisted.  Actually comparatively a 100 foot of hemp is hardly twisted compared to his sick little mind.  I just keep hoping his name doesn’t really end up on a ballot somewhere.  Of course he wouldn’t be the first guy in office with a thing for little brunettes, thigh high stockings, wax, and combat boots.   Moving right along

So with that behind us.  Sit back relax. And once again let your imagination run wild.  And so we begin… Bunnies and why I kind of hate holidays.

In this life one can never know where things will lead.   Just when you think you crossed some final imaginary boundary the unimaginable happens.  Its mid week and I managed to catch a flight back from a trip that got me in around midnight.  There is not much better than coming home a day early to a house stocked with booze, food, and a very naked Chesty Blonde.  Well the food and booze are for the pagan festival we’re hosting this weekend for Halloween but the naked woman was all for me.  So after a very , very nice welcome home  and a little small talk I dozed off to sleep.  The next morning I wake up stupid early, listen to a series of foreign accents arguing on a conference call even before the coffee pot finishes working its magic, and am stumbling around in a stupor.

At the heart of the matter even though my life is deranged both professionally and personally by most people’s standards but the rest of the house hold lives a very normal existence and despite my lack of faith the kids attend catholic school.  At their school they have a saint parade where they have to pick a saint, do a report and then dress up as that saint. I guess it’s sort of the anti Halloween party thing.  One year I picked the kids up after their “saint party” dressed as the devil since our annual party was that night and the theme was Heaven and Hell.  Despite my hedonistic existence, blasphemous behavior, and 16 years of overpriced catholic education I had no idea that saints used rope to hold their clothes on.  I thought it was the sole province of the Hill Billy side of my genealogy which I am sure none of whom are even remotely qualified for canonization.

The following conversation took place over breakfast yesterday.

The Chesty Blonde (TCB): “ Lilly needs some type of belt for her saint costume”

Me “ um ok”  at this point I’m laying in front of the fire place nursing my morning addiction and admiring my partner’s cleavage beneath the tight black cami.

TCB  “ I was thinking some type of rope for a belt”

Me “ ok what kind of rope?”

At this point I’d like to point out I’m a bit of a rope coinsure, it’s not a surprise to most people reading this and certainly not to TCB. So I continue.

Me   “so what color?  Do you want something natural or MFP?” the list went on and on.  Amelda Marcos had closet full of shoes she’d never worn and I have bag of rope that never been used “just in case”. 

TCB  just rolled her eyes as I scampered off with coffee in hand to collect an assortment of rope I’d not yet gotten around to using for a more nefarious purpose. Upon my return I heard.

TCB “can we cut it?”

Me “ do we have to?”  Mean while a pair of EMT shears were well with insight. I brought them along out of habit more than anything.

It was decided that a 10ft piece of new natural Twisted Monk 6mm hemp was the right look.  So I knotted the thing and  unraveled  and frayed the ends to where I  had finished the rope all while doing a small diatribe how whipped ends were so much better.  I figured that eventually I’d have to cut it to fit as a belt but it wouldn’t be the first time I’d cut a piece of rope. 

I spent the next 15 minute tying and untying a series of cuffs and shackles on the Blonde with various other ropes while sipping coffee.  She looked bored but humored me and eventually made an off hand comment about me being out of practice when one knot was slightly askew.  I reassured her that was fine and that I’d get plenty of practice tonight after work.

After all any morning where I get to spend an extra 45 minutes alone with the Blonde is a great morning, when it involves coffee  even better.  Add some rope to the mix and it’s just like heaven . 

After school Lilly is none the wiser and thrilled to have her costume complete.  Of course it led to her swinging the rope like an irate invading Viking would a mace or battle axe before she turned to me and asked how cowboys tie a lasso.  So of course I showed her.  She spent the night tying and untying the lasso and roping a dining room chair like a run away calf.  It might be a good skill to have since we live in the Midwest and she’ll be in great shape if we ever move to Texas.

As for me I it’s another first since I sincerely doubt that any previous saints in the school’s long, illustrious, and over priced history had a part of their costume that went from being a potential shackle for some random stunt bunny type to a much holier purpose. 

Lilly later asked me “is that good rope?” seeing as she’s fairly fashion and brand conscious it really wasn’t an odd question. So I reassured it would be the best quality rope on any of the costumes which seemed to suffice.  All the while I was thanking my own nonexistent personal deity that she wasn’t asking for a brand.  Then what would I have said?  “Oh I ordered it from a specialty shop on the internet.“  I doubt my mind would have been that quick under the circumstances.    

Today as I got ready for work and she headed out the door for school dressed as St. Genevieve (I think the Patron Saint of Paris, I’m more familiar with the sister or Mercy’s Greatest hits)  for me there is a deranged sense of satisfaction knowing that first and foremost the kid was happy with her costume.  Secondly that even now a little bit of my twisted soul is walking the halls of some place it would not be welcome.   As for religion in general…well what can I say?  Catholics are a kinky lot.  I should know I spent most of my teens honing my skills with the girls tight white blouses, short plaid skirts and deviant sexual desires.  Actually if it weren’t for them I might be a very different person; I never tied a nice Jewish, Hindu or Buddhist girl to anything until years later.

Yes I know I’m going to hell.  No need to remind me.

So as most of you know I’ve tried to focus my efforts on other things of late.   My Vegas exploits went largely undocumented except for a few tweets here and there.  There should have been a blog on Elfvis alone.  I’ve been working too much and actually writing and recording music once again.  It seems though that the kinky life can’t escape me for long, some of us despite our best efforts just don’t belong in polite and sexually repressed society.  So as I headed out Saturday night with some friends of the Blonde’s I expected nothing more than dinner, drinks, some old friends, and a few new acquaintances.   Seems a few of those folks may not be as pure as I anticipated.  Which is of course perfectly fine with me and made for a much better evening.

Alcohol is an amazing moral liberator even in limited quantities.  Me I was sipping diet coke at an alarming rate since I’m already pretty open minded.  After a few hours I can always play the sharp tongued sarcastic prick or shameless flirt.  Though I’m not really playing since that tends to be who I am once I get comfortable with the people I’m around.

The restaurant had an edgy sexual theme which worked just fine for me. The Menu featured “happy Endings” that included DD Cup Cakes, Of course there was the dominate red meat chilli and the submissive baked potato soup that I couldn’t help but point out to my usual companion who just rolled her eyes and said “sure why don’t you take a picture and tweet it”.  So I did as others looked on and I explained there were a few menu items I wanted to share with some other friends.  No one asked, most people were only two drinks in at that point and even if they did I didn’t give a fuck.

What are they going to say “Oh mike what are you taking a picture of?”

“The portion of the menu that has an S&M theme to it, I’ve got a few (hundred) twisted friends who would get off on it”.   The shock value would have been great.  But no one asked.

Normally I’m rather quiet at these things having learned over the years that my views and expectations of acceptable behave are best reserved for like minded souls.  Then I heard.  “wow look at that guy he’s got a 70’s porno mustache.”  First I was shocked to hear the statement, second the man was right and third three of the ladies at the table that I had just met agreed emphatically.  The next hour was spent discussing the different era’s of Porn, stylistically of course and in a euphemism laden, semi wholesome way.  Bush management and fitness levels were the main topics.  They were more my type of crowd than I could have imagined.

A few hours later with the beer flowing like a river, margarita’s by the  truck load and the shots arriving for the birthday boy the party was in honor of inevitably a Blow Job arrived.   Now the poor soul had no clue how to drink the damn thing, was two and a half sheets to the wind, and probably couldn’t stop looking at the waitress’ cleavage as she explained the rules. Well I was having that problem so I figured a drunk guy wouldn’t fare much better.   Anyway after an odd attempt the included him wearing more of the shot than anything the curvy blond next to me offered “when I turned 21 I had to do three Blow Jobs off this disgusting old guys lap in front of the bar before he spanked me.”  I just smiled.  “it was my birthday” she then offered explaining why she was getting spanked.  So my smile went to my somewhat infamous knowing devilish grin,  The Chesty Blonde just eyed me as the woman spoke knowing all to well something was afoot.  She’s seen that look directed at her too many times to not be able to spot it instantly.  So my sinister intent begins offering my new friend “Oh so that’s why you got spanked.  Too that’s bad.”

.. ..

She blushed “it was the last time I was spanked in public” she said, her eyes telling me I’d hit a nerve, in a good way.   So much for an all nilla crowd.  So I offered to fix that.  She never answered rather  she just blushed the color I imagined I’d like to turn her beautiful ass. After a few intense seconds with three others I barely knew listening in I simply changed the subject and she spent the rest of the night chatting me up about everything and nothing at all.

.. ..

The remainder of the night I never bought up anything other than not so polite bar conversation and avoided all lifestyle topics focusing my attention on the lithe dark red haired server at the next establishment.  Sure when the group teased me about convincing some poor bastard there for his bachelor party to not get married I launched in to an x rated triad about how marriage will make a man drink diet coke and drive a sedan (I was of course drinking a diet coke and arrived in a sedan). Pontificating that why should someone be with just one woman who would destroy your soul when you could enjoy so many in a biblical sense and live an inspired existence.   Everyone laughed as they looked nervously at the Chesty Blonde who has heard the same bit a million times before and just smiled back at them. I tell everyone whether I know them or not to never get married and always have.   The poor bachelor upon my obvious to the world and oblivious to him approach quickly admitted he had been puking in the restroom on and off for the last two hours and that the toilet seat kept falling hitting him in the head while blowing chunks.  I decided that the impending miserable marriage of a total stranger was not more important than avoiding getting puked on.  So I spared him my diatribe sent him another drink and turned my attention and venomous rage at the guy playing trumpet in the band and singing off key.

.. ..

And there you have it folks my life in a nut shell.  A seemingly nice, sober guy out with his wife and her friends for a little harmless fun and instead of talking about little Susie’s soccer game and family shit I’m talking porn, trying to figure out how to turn the woman that I sat down next to randomly into a play partner of some type, and telling everyone wit in ear shot how stupid marriage is while trying to seduce a 20 something lithe little red head despite the fact I very much like being married to my wife and she was sitting on the other side of me.

.. ..

Most people would be headed to divorce court, couples therapy, or the morgue because someone killed them in their sleep; but not me.  It’s just another day in my life and while days like this aren’t as common as they used to be they’re not so out of the ordinary either.

I'm back to my wicked musical ways. I guess evil always returns to its roots.

Well my friends if you’re reading this odds are you are one of the truly devoted, a personal friend, truly deranged or happened across something you thought would be salacious.  Allowing of course for the mathematical possibility of any given combination of the two could in fact exist.  If we’ve communicated here or else where and you don’t want to read the entire post who could blame you?  Certainly not me given what I am about to say since it is not my standard fare. Despite that if nothing else  please do scroll to the end where the italics appear and read that portion.  And so we begin.....

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I’ve said it before I used to fuck a Socialist, Hell I’ve written those words here and a few other places over the years.  There is nothing quite like Sex and Politics for stirring up a debate.   In part in jest and in part I’ve attempted to share my views with you if for no other reason to but to entertain and let you into a small corner of my world.

.. ..

  In truth I was very much use to be in love with a socialist (sorry babe facts are facts now might be a good time to stop reading because its not censored at all), I was not in love with her beliefs, ironically she was deeply religious, VERY Catholic and I was a humanist at best and an atheist most often. This however is not a religious debate.

.. ..

I was not in love with her political views, if there was a poster child for the Bleeding Heart Liberal she would have been it.  Sure there were those tender moments, a snowy night in particular comes to mind it was dark, we had sleds she was wearing a yellow ski suit her long dark locks cascading out of a white knit hat.  Lying in the snow at the top of a hill along the tree line looking at the stars; its when we had our first political disagreement.  As a point of fact it was over the Idea of universal health care.  The year was 1989.  She thought I was cold, unsympathetic.  This was before being politically correct was in vogue.  Guess what?  I listened and she was as mystified as to why I didn’t care for my fellow man equally.  I didn’t feel anyone was not my equal just simply that if I earned something whether by blood, sweat, and tears or sheer dumb luck it was mine and fuck everybody else.  I have never been an idealist not as a child filled with fancy and not now.  Yet I was young and dumb and very much in love her for far more than her body and the questionable political views and depraved sexual acts we’d enjoy together.  I believed our country was great and stood for something important.

.. ..

I can still feel her not as a remembrance of a lovers touch but slandering my birth name and political views in the comfort of her current ivory tower academic post. While I have used this name to mock both sides of the aisle of the political world and lampooned my own life in the private sector it has never been my intention to be political here.  Just to point out the absurd and have a laugh or two.  At heart I’m an not a Republican or a Democrat.   I’m not even a Libertarian I stand firmly between  an Anarchist and George Washington who was a smart guy who knew enough to not trust the very Government he created.....

.. ..

  I wondered and mused about how the housing bubble had burst last summer, I talked about running through a subdivision where a family that had been foreclosed on had their possessions piled in the front lawn.  It was upsetting it was traumatizing.  It was the result of so many unforeseen factors.  I neither knew them or their circumstances but guess what I could relate none of us I would venture are ever really that far from our worlds collapsing.  I wondered what my beloved Socialist Ex would have thought, what would she have said if we had been there together that morning.  Instead I came home and told the Blonde about it.  It was a passing note on an otherwise uneventful day.  Still I couldn’t get the image out of my mind.

My lovely raven haired socialist would have said that the system failed that the state should have stepped in.  At the end of it all I’d have to disagree…in plain fact people like me failed.   We failed as shareholders to ensure the institutions were lending responsibly that the equivalent of teaching kids new math wasn’t happening. One plus one will never equal 412 no mater how much we’d like it to.  Who knows if the owner had over extended or had something tragic happened.  I have friends and acquaintances who aren’t working and desperately want to.  I know of thousands more whose jobs are in jeopardy based on which way the chips fall.  Seemingly there is not much we can do to stop it.

.. ..

Have you ever created new jobs?  Built a company from scratch or taken one though a large expansion?  I have and while those are the things that if I shared my resume with you I would boast about but I’ve been on the down side of that equation as well.  What I can tell you is there are nights when people like me and far above me don’t sleep at all.  Not when times are good and not when they are bad.  Many of us corporate villains don’t sleep because are worried about the business and people are an inherent part of any business. I have never looked across the table at a man or woman who was about to lose their jobs and not thought of them as my responsibility and my failure not theirs.

.. ..

A VP who I knew and had an understanding with won my undying support when his hard vicious exterior showed true humanity last fall as a company was forced to reduce its staff.  He took it personally, as his failure and that he let those people down.  I’ve been that guy across the table letting people go. I knew where he was and how it felt.   Even when you see a bull in a ....China.... shop wearing a Brooks Brothers suit don’t put us all in the same category.  Some times it happens because it simple is a fact of business and others because the grim reality is we simple didn’t need their services anymore.  In any of those cases they weren’t bad people.  None of them had stolen from the company and even if they had there would be no joy in it. 

.. ..

My Socialist lover would wrapped herself around me so I couldn’t slip away into the night.  Either that or she was cold or possible craved the genuine affection.  I’d wake her with a good swat on the ass to announce in a not so subtle way I was ready for more.  More of what ever struck my fancy and hers.   It was a rude awakening in many ways.  Sine those youthful days I’ve laid in bed awake countless times  and looked across at the Blonde.  Not once swatting her while she was asleep.   During the day that sort of thing is inbounds but at night well her sleep is scared and mine is rare.  In the dead of the night as I laid there silently it was at those times and understood why people live in gated communities with security details when a person has to do those things no matter how necessary and ugly things can spiral out of control.  I’ve wished I had afforded my family that level of protection.  My old lover however daring she was and willing to try anything who I imagine still sits and laments how whoever she supports can fix it all for us, how we should all be responsible has never created one damn job with a dime of profit she made.   Those we have elected on both sides of the argument are not much better.  Should we trust them to fix anything?  Personally I wouldn’t let them change my tires.

.. ..

.. ..

 As a rude awaking last fall’s economic meltdown made me think.  It should have made you think it too.  Personally it was the adult equivalent of finding out that everything you believed in was a lie.  I was a full card carrying capitalist.  I almost shredded that card.  I’ve seen my own parents who believed in the system and the free market lose a vast amount of their life’s savings, not due to risky investments but due to the failure of all that we held dear failing them.  Nothing tragic but rather than a redistribution of wealth it was an evaporation of their savings.  Will they lose their home…no.  Will they not go out as often or see their grandchildren as much…that sadly will be the case.

.. ..

So as much as I hate it when U2 preaches at me or movie stars, athletes and politicians tell me what to think. So I ask that you take the time to read the current bills in front of congress. I’ve put away the ropes and toys to do the same for a while.  Understand the implications of what has been done both by Bush and the Republicans and by Obama and the Democrats.  If you agree with them then by all means support them if not tell them!

.. ..

  Write your senators and congressmen with your own well founded opinion pro and con.  Go to town hall meetings, go to city hall for god’s sake understand the points and impact to the best of your ability and don’t take any answer they or any media outlet including morons like me give you.  Really know it like 1+1=2 and keep knowing it.  

.. ..

As a dear Aussie friend always says “good bye for now”. 

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I’m not deleting the profile and will put up one last post in the next few weeks linking to a long three part Introspection piece I did a few months ago about a friend who I met up with again after nearly 20 years.  If you’re interested it’s a close look into how I view my own day to day world.  For the first time I’ll know how it looks to another who lived those moments with me.  

.. ..

On here I’ve been absent more than I’ve been present.  I don’t have it in my heart to write erotica, or to poke fun at the political systems these times are far too serious for me to do that.  I’ve tried but learned in life to only do what there is a true passion for and now that  passion is dormant.  I’ll still be reading, and commenting but will apologize for falling dreadfully behind in advance.   If you’re on twitter add me there under what else but malflic and send me a note.  In the mean time I’m going to focus all of my effort personally in creating maybe just one or two new jobs where I’m at and a maybe one or two in my side ventures over time.  All of this while I seriously entertain the idea of beginning a political life, not out of need, not out of ego or even idealism but out of disgust.  I feel like another voice screaming in a stadium and maybe just maybe if I yell a little louder, risk a little more personally we can shake the bastards who are fucking everything up and actually be heard.   

.. ..

If that’s the road I take I don’t expect to be elected but I will not go quietly even as this voice of mine falls silent.  I promise if I get summoned to testify before congress because of a dissenting opinion or an unsympathetic voice bordering on being an enemy of the state I’ll wear my pink shirt from the profile so you know its really me.  So as I said before…good bye for now…

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Postlude....

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I’m sure I will miss some people I should thank here but please take these next words as intended...as genuine thanks and admiration for all of you.  ....

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To The Good Reverend Sleestaxx…I’m embracing the anger with in.  I’m going to unleash its fury on the world and while I do that I’ll be thinking of Henry Rollins and his Bird ....Bath..... All the while I’ll try not to come off as crazy as Dean Howard and Wendy O on a bender…but no promises ....

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To the Naked Nurse – You’ve given me some of the best bed time reading I’ve ever enjoyed.  With out exception I look forward to every new post and do miss some of the more personal stories from a while back, albeit the latest was very sad.  Quit giving your stuff away.  You’re a special lady and far too talented to stay published only here, take a chance be a wild girl, buckle down sell some of your stories and make some money with your writing gifts.  I’ll always be cheering for you and willing to help in any way that I can.  ....

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Sabrina – I enjoyed seeing some lighter writing from you lately not that the dark wasn’t wondrous and insightful.  Its great to see you continuing on and others taking notice and appreciating your talents.   All the best to you and the Viking. FYI It looks like Sept will be my next trip your way.....

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Sweettalk – you know where to find me come hockey season and I know where to find you and those lovely words you create.  Next year I’ll be sure to get s few pics of Mario’s house for you.....

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Cupid you always with out fail made me smile and laugh.  Not an easy task.....

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Macidy if you ever show back up and read this I miss your well thought out angry rants.....

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Innocent Brat – Someday I’ll make it back to your part of the world.  If I do I’ll drop you a line.....

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To all my other friends here than you so much for the comments, conversation and writing I have truly enjoyed it.    

Good Bye
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I often begin conversations with “I am Evil, I am wicked, I am Malflic”  It is very much a self serving statement and an honest self interpretation of what I do in my day to day life.  I tell my own children no one has ever paid me to be nice, Joke about not having a soul but in truth probably very much do. After all I once played in a band named 13 Bastard Souls which might have been my all time favorite name.  Ironically there were only a few of us in band.    

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In my day to day world I am often alone in public places but rarely alone, I am guarded and measured.  At one point in time my temper was legendary.  With the years its mellowed…well that and I’ve got other people to be the heavies and I can be the gentle tired old soul far more often with that fire burning far from sight.  As I finished my most recent incarnation of flying corporate goon for once I got to ride off into the sunset not with a team of finance geeks and attorneys, or other slick looking smooth talking sales guys and empty suits but alone in a monstrosity of an America Luxury car (which made me lust for German engineering even more).

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Just a day before I was hosting dinner, kissing hands and shaking babies.   Decked out in my finest garb, tie perfectly tied, puckered and to the top of my belt.  I am not much better than the politicians I so often poke fun at. I meet with people and garner support, I pursue ideas and most of my real deals are done over a drink or away from the light of day behind closed doors with aforementioned army of business geeks.   It was not that kind of night, it was a brief respite in a world that literally never sleeps and is destined to drag me down into its murky greed filled depths.

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Often I bitch about the privilege I have worked to obtain. About the fact that I am in demand and that there seems and often is no rest for the wicked.   In truth those things are both a blessing and a curse.  But this night was different I would slip away in to the sun setting over the mountains.  I told the farthest corners of my world I’d be “out of pocket”, that I had a meeting.  Many asked when they could call, why did we need to reschedule, others probably just shrugged and were relieved not to need to deal with me for once.  Vanishing into the night is a specialty of mine. I do it often and live a segmented life.

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One of the things my lifestyle affords me is the ability to every once in a great while disappear. My next regularly scheduled disappearance will be in late Sept in Vegas in case anyone will be there (no south beach this year).  This will be a public disappearance cased in beverages and questionable behavior.  Although with any luck other disappearances will happen before then.  I did that last night as I chased the sunset westward into the mountains.   Ahh beautiful green lush towering mounds, I left the high way and made my way to meet some friends.

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We talked, we joked, I was my all too typical weekday self reserved.  I said things in the course of conversation that in retrospect were probably very telling, work things like “ I don’t trust outside Money”  Made a few jokes about Venture Capitalist.  I do have friends who play in the VC world and from time to time I indulge them in a conversation.  In a very small way I am one myself. It is a rare occasion for me to slip away mentally so completely so quickly. As I pulled up  and entered I was greeted at the door by my hostess a sexy little red head with an easy smile, a very warm embrace and a short black skirt that the long lost school boy just wanted to flip up when she passed.  Instead I behaved.   My host for the evening was a great soul with thick hands much like my own, an easy going nature and a person that I instantly enjoyed the conversation with.  Very little in life is better than great conversation.

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We sat and talked for hours, only looking at my crack berry once and not twittering at all.  My left tit did begin ringing at one point which led to an answered phone call that included laughter and a freak bout of awkwardness as I spoke into the device and couldn’t hear a damn thing before realizing that my blue tooth was still synced so bumbling my way off that call (only to explain later to the caller I was “in a meeting”).

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The act of forgetting where one’s headset might not seem significant, it might seem trivial or at best absent minded.  In truth it is the highest compliment I could have paid to anyone with out them knowing it.   On this particular evening as I talked about friends, and literature, travel and cars and movies I was present, engaged solely the conversation that was occurring and only with the people I was with.  No preoccupations, no nagging obsessions about distant things beyond my immediate control.  It is a rare thing for me, truly a treasure, nothing else in the world mattered for a few fleeting hours, not the trivial, not the important.   I was alive and at peace staying longer than intended and leaving far earlier than I would have liked.

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By the time I hit the highway again I had dialed countries across the world twice to answer a question.   I returned the brief call that I had taken earlier.  Then in an act of imperceptible defiance I called my dear friend ....Victoria.... deciding that I wanted to spend the remainder of journey back with her rather than with work stuff.  After all leaving a Fiery Red Head and a Viking there was no one else more appropriate to call than my own personal Viking.  Besides I’m sure the Blonde was already in bed resting up for my triumphant return the next day right?

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“Did you have fun”  She asked.  “It was great!” I beamed into the phone.

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“I want details.  All of them.  Did you scene” she prodded.  “Miss Christiansen it was not anything salacious”  I chided her.  She seemed disappointed. After all she does love the details and when I’m salacious “You didn’t do the Malflic thing did you?”

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“No I was not sullen and withdrawn” A running joke between us based on a Zappa song

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“That’s not what I meant” she insisted not falling for my attempt at a redirect

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“I did have a Vonnegut moment during the night but it passed quickly” going on to explain that when with people Vonnegut often worried that people expected him to be different than he was. 

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“Were you watching the room or working it?”  I laughed “it was just a few of us, it was quiet and calm, and perfect.”

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It was at that moment that I realized what she meant.  It wasn’t the Malflic thing she really meant that would have been to be the outrageous life of the party or the astute observer watching all the angles.   It was the German thing, the thing that despite her best efforts was done by my mother’s side of the family.   Did my hugs lack warmth? I certainly hope not though I swallowed no ones in my arms the though had not occurred to me.   Was my laugh forced and not devious bordering on slightly wicked.  On that one the wickedness was there even though my behavior was completely gentlemanly.

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Driving toward the sunrise that would happen only a handful of hours after I shuffled though the lobby, wearily answered emails and finished my conversation. Laying my head down looking forward to the next time I could see my friends again I drifted of for once to a peaceful undisturbed sleep.  Even when I’m not wicked I still need at least a little rest.

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Undisturbed being a relative term seeing as the alarm went off at 5:00

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