Gender: Male
Status: Married
Age: 50
Sign: Aquarius
City: GALESBURG
State: ILLINOIS
Country: US
Signup Date: 4/10/2006
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Saturday, December 19, 2009
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 All
of the folks who worked to put on the Galesburg Christian Theater
production of "Three Wisemen and a Baby" hosted at our church, deserve
a lot of credit and thanks, and we do thank you. There is one young man
however, who has made some tremendous personal sacrifices in order to
uphold his commitment to be in this production, which has caused him
other problems, but in order to be a man of integrity, he has paid the
price. He does not even know that I know of these sacrifices, and I
don't believe Amber knows of them, but I wanted him to know, it has
been noticed, and so very much appreciated. Jordan, I have always
thought a lot of you, but your stock went way up in my book this past
week. You are quite a young man, and I am very proud of you and
thankful for you!
Thank you more than words can say!
Pastor D
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Friday, December 18, 2009
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I
don't have to tell anyone that the Christmas season is a rushed, hectic
and stressful time of year. It is amazing what we (as a society) have
turned Christmas into. I'd dare say that for most people, Christmas
really has nothing to do with Jesus anymore. This fact is pretty
obvious, but the harshness of this reality hit me like a bat upside the
head a couple of nights ago. I was sitting listening to the school
choir that my daughter sings in perform their Christmas concert. They
were singing a Christmas song that speaks clearly about the birth of
Jesus. As I scanned over the choir, my eyes happened upon one young
lady who is a professing atheist who will confront Christians in a
heartbeat trying to bait them into an argument over the existence of
God. Her face was just beaming as she sang this song, so I just had to
ask her about. The next day I found the opportunity and asked her about
that song (and others) and what it meant to her. She said it was
nothing, just some beautiful music, nothing more. She had to get her
dig in and she made a comment as to how sad it is that "you people"
have to depend on such a crutch. I refused to get into the debate at
that moment and told her we'd make that dance another day. I walked
away feeling so heart broken for her. It's a terrible thing being lost,
but it is even worse to be lost and not know it. That's where she and
her family are. As I got back in my van, I looked at the others around
me and I realized that odds were that the vast majority of those that I
could see at that moment were lost, wandering aimlessly and without
hope. Most of them were and are so excited that Christmas time is here,
but they are missing the meaning for the whole thing. They are
celebrating Christmas... but leaving out the Christ... the Messiah, the
Savior.
What a terrible waste of time, money... and life.
They
are ignoring or oblivious to the answer to all of life's questions...
exchanging it for parties, fancy paper and gifts that will be mostly
forgotten a month from now.
I pray that some how, some way, they
discover the Christ child during this holiday season and they find out
just why he came... to seek and to save that which is lost.
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Friday, December 11, 2009
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Earlier
this week I was having a conversation with someone who has been
struggling, and who had fallen out of church. (I hate that terminology,
because no one "falls" out, they walk out... but that's for another blog.)
Anyway, this person was talking about the need to make some changes in their life, but said that they just could not seem to figure out how to make those changes.
This got me to start thinking about how I make real changes in my own life.
Not just any change, but the kind that changes my life, that really change me.
As I reflect back on my life, I realize that whenever I have made changes that really took, I have had to change what i believe.
One
thing that I have learned is that just repeating concepts that other
people have written about or spoke of has never worked to change what i
think, because it doesn't change what i believe.
News Flash: You and I just can't talk ourselves into accepting a thought that we have no basis for believing.
Those
that have known me longest know that toward the end of the 70's and
into the early 80's, when I was teen going into my early adult years I
had some serious meltdowns. The truth is, I never had much confidence
in myself and as a product of my insecurity and lack of self worth, I
had never really learned
to relate with others. I found my confidence in a bottle of Southern
Comfort or Vodka, smoking pot, and various other drugs I used as my
problem grew deeper.
I
reached the place that I could not even function in life without
chemical "assistance." In high school I always had a bottle in my
locker, another in my
car, stashed in my room, at work (I worked at Pizza Hut while in
school) and always had plenty of pot stashed as well. Few of my friends
new just how much I was drinking. Some actually saw me do a pinch
hitter sitting in the back corner of the class room or bathroom, but
they saw it as my being funny or trying to draw attention... I don't think anyone saw the dependence.
A
really strange pattern developed in my life in my teen years. It's
really weird. I never had any sense of self worth, so I was always
seeking for approval
of someone else. I constantly had to have a girl friend, because that
meant I was accepted. I know, many folks do that. Where it really got
weird was that I never
would let anyone get too close to me. For one, if someone got too
close, they might really discover just how much I was drinking, smoking
and popping pills.
Another
thing was that after losing my parents and my brother at a young age, I
made up my mind that I just would not let anyone get inside of me. It
hurt too much when they were gone, so I pushed them away.
I hurt a lot of people over the years because I'd let someone get just so close to me and then abruptly end a relationship for absolutely no reason that they could see.
A really strange twist was that if the young lady ended the relationship with me, I would feel so rejected that I would have an absolute meltdown and frequently became suicidal.
Ironically,
I grew up in church, and come from a family with a strong relationship
with Christ. Several times over the years I would pray and ask Jesus
into my
life. My
thinking was that because I asked Jesus into my life that things would
change all by themselves. I found out that this is not how things work.
I
got to the place that church and religion was a place to go and appease
my guilty conscience and make me feel better for awhile, before I slipped right back into my "normal" way of doing life.
This became a regular pattern for me, running back to God every now and then when I was suffering another of my meltdowns, until finally began to feel that God was rejecting me too.
This was primarily because my image of God was that
of a God who was really pissed off at the world (and me) most of the
time. God was a God who would "get you" if you did not serve Him.
I now know that I never really wanted to know God, but in fact, most
of the times I had come to an altar to pray, it was usually because
some one had preached a message on Hell and once again, how God was
ticked off and was going to punish me.
This pattern, this vicious cycle continued on and on, with each cycle taking me deeper into depression, anxiety, feeling useless and the drinking and drug use escalated, pulling me more and more into a pit of despair.
I began looking for new highs and rushes in my life,
and my exploration took me into a life of crime. I really did not need
the money as I had a good job and was making a lot more dealing drugs to my co-workers. It was simply the "rush" that I felt when I stuck a gun in someones face and demanded their money or whatever.
Everything
in my life began to unravel on December 17, 1980 when I was arrested on
murder charges along with a host of others. In the course of the legal wrangling,
it was found that I had not been involved in the murder, but a "friend"
who I had brought into my criminal ways, had gotten out of control and
killed a woman and then told the police that I had done it. By the time
they finished with him, the detectives had enough evidence against me on
other charges that I was facing a long, long time in prison. I became
more suicidal at that time than ever before, and nearly killed myself
several times between December 1980 and June 1980.
Oh yeah, I tried the "religion" angle during that time too, but I was looking for a way out of my trouble, not a change of life.
Then, on June 12, 1981, I had a real, personal encounter with Jesus Christ.
I have to admit, even then I thought things would change by themselves.
It still did not happen. My circumstances did not automatically get better.
In fact, I went to prison.
But being born again made me a new creature on the inside.
What I discovered is that my new birth gave me a brand new nature, and gave me access to everything God is and has.
But being born again didn't automatically change my mind, the part of me that connects to this world. It took me awhile, but I discovered that my mind wasn't the part of me that was born again.
The bible says in several places to put on the new man, made in the image of God.
It took me some time to grasp why that is necessary, and how that is done.
Like so many new believers, i thought changes would just take me over.
But the mind has to be renewed before the changes are evident.
In
the book of James it is described like a man who looks at himself in a
mirror, and then goes away and forgets what he looks like. The
man who continues to renew his mind with the Word of God is like a man
who continually looks into a mirror, sees the image of God there, and begins to believe that that is what he looks like too.
The
key that began a life long change took place laying in a hospital room
in Menard Penitentiary in January 1982, when a priest challenged me to
forget everything I had ever heard about God, church,
religion and the Bible, and to read the Bible for myself and ask the
Holy Spirit to reveal the true nature of God to me.
I was so tired of stumbling in the dark, and I accepted his challenge.
I asked the Holy Spirit to be my teacher, and He lead me to a scripture that launched me into many changes ever since that time.
1 John 4:16, “and we have known and believed the love that God hath to us …”
It was like the light came on!
It was not that God was pissed off or angry with me... God loved me!
Some of you are going, "Duh!?!"
But this was brand new to me! It changed me... and it will change you!
I now know God loves me.
Understand this... I KNOW... I BELIEVE that God loves me... and it is NOT because i feel like He loves me, because to be quite honest, there are times when I don't FEEL like He is even paying attention, let alone that he loves me.
But I KNOW that He loves me, and my friends... knowledge is power!
My faith is built on what I know the Word says, which never changes.
My feelings are the reactions of everything I think, experience, and believe.
It is easier to walk on water than to build on my feelings!
Why? Because they are always changing!
So when I saw this verse, I knew what to do. I had to begin to choose to believe.
Understand, NOT just believe whatever sounded good, or whatever people told me. I had to choose to believe what God was telling me.
He reveals what His Word is saying to my heart, and I choose to believe it.
Then
i stand on it and speak it to myself – the same way people do when
they're worrying about something and continually say what they're
afraid is going to happen.
I began to apply this to all the scriptures that describe who and what i am in Christ. And you know what?
I began to renew my mind!
And as my mind was renewed, I began to walk in newness of life.
It was like being a warrior, and finally beginning to put on my armor.
It was like being a child of the King, and finally holding my head up, not because of who I am, but because of whose I am.
You know, the fact is that in the 28 years since I met Jesus, this world hasn't changed, except maybe to have gotten worse. There will always be things to contend with. There will be difficult people who will hurt me. There will be losses, pain and yes, there will be storms.
But I have changed.
I will still make mistakes, and sometimes do the wrong thing out of anger.
I still have many changes to make.
But these things, and the world, don't tell me who I am anymore.
I know who i am.
At times I still do struggle with having a personal identity, but I know I am a man who is in covenant with God. Today, I really know Who I am in covenant with and that makes me strong.
I wont be having anymore meltdowns.
Thank you Jesus!
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Thursday, December 10, 2009
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OK,
since Gibbs says climate change is no longer debatable, I guess we are
just supposed to accept that fact and bow down to those who want to
rape our wallets and steal our freedoms in the name of a global farce
that has now been proven to have been created by a bunch of
knuckleheads. Notice that it has gone from "Global Warming" to "Climate
Change." Duh... of course the climate is changing! It always has
changed and gone through cycles. When I was in high school all the
"experts" were telling us we were on the threshold of an ice age. Then
they told us we were creating holes in the ozone layer and the temps
were going to continue to rise. Now that the cycle is changing again
and the temps have dropped over the past year or more, they are
altering their hypothesis yet again. Has anyone noticed that the people
spewing this rhetoric are getting rich off of it? Hello? Yeah, the
climate is changing... it does it four times a year, and they are
called seasons.
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Wednesday, December 09, 2009
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This about says it all.
The Marines Show You How .... There's a 'message' in this video. You've
got to take two minutes to watch this comparison between George Bush's
visit with the Marines vs. Obama's recent trip. It is incredible.
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Tuesday, December 08, 2009
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I'm sure I will get blasted for this post, but hey, I'm used to it.
The
thing is, that "Christianity" is changing. Today's breed of Christian
feels no need to be committed to church, no need to tithe, no need to
live a life of holiness... it's all about them and how God accepts them
just as they are. The thing is, God DOES accept us into the family of
God just as we are, but then there is supposed to be a change. Seems
like I read somewhere something about not being conformed to the this
world. In fact, that verse in Romans 12:2 reads this way in the New
Living Translation: "Don't copy the behavior and customs of this world,
but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you
think." This new breed of Christian thinks that they can show how cool
they are and how cool God is by using profane speech and shock value in
their behavior. God's not interested in being "cool." You see, cool
today is lame tomorrow. God is who He is. We are to conform to the
image of His son, not try to conform to the image of the world.
Oh...
relevant? Yes, we do need to present the Gospel in a relevant way, but
that NEVER means compromising our standard (of holiness) nor the
integrity of the Gospel or our Lord. Today we have people sitting in
our church singing praises to God, raising their hands and shouting...
then going out and having illicit sex, drinking with their buds and
acting exactly like the world. Call me judgmental, but I'm saying God
is not having a part of this! God demands that we be a holy people. God
demands that we come out from among them and be separate.
This "new
breed" of Christianity is NOT Christianity at all. To be a "Christian"
means to be Christ-like." Somehow, I just do not believe that Jesus
would be using the language and doing the things that so called
Christians are doing today.
Nope... Not buying it.
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Monday, December 07, 2009
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Whenever
people tell me that they are upset, not feeling good, or just about
anything negative, I am notorious for saying, "Stop it!" It dawned on
me a few days ago that many people around me have no clue why I say
this, and I promised one of my church members earlier this week I would
post the reason for it on my blog. I forgot about it until just a few
minutes ago I again told someone, "Stop it!"
So... here's the reason why Pastor D says, "Stop it!" so much:
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Saturday, December 05, 2009
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I wanted to share this from my online devotion (The Word For Today)"'Can anything...separate us from Christ's love?...'"
Romans 8:35 NLT Our
limited minds can't comprehend God's love because it comes with no
strings attached. He doesn't love us 'if,' but 'in spite of.' As a
parent you may not approve of your child's behaviour, but you always
love and accept them. Paul asks, 'Can anything ever separate us from
Christ's love?'(Romans 8:35 NLT) Then he answers, '...I am convinced
that nothing can ever separate us from God's love...'(Romans 8:38)
Doesn't that blow your mind? We have just enough ego to believe there
are certain sins God can't get over; like the ones we never commit. Do
you remember the Pharisee in the temple who prayed, '...God, I thank
You that I am not like other men; extortioners, unjust, adulterers,
or...this tax collector [standing next to me].' (Luke 18:11 NKJV)
Understand this: God's standard is perfection, and you couldn't reach
it in a thousand lifetimes! Grace is the only hope any of us have.
Our love for God relates to the level of the forgiveness we've received
from Him. The Pharisees were shocked that Jesus would allow a woman
with a bad reputation to kneel at His feet, bathing them with her tears
and drying them with her hair. They thought, '...If Jesus were a
prophet, He would know that the woman...is a sinner!' (Luke 7:39 NCV)
No, it wasn't that Jesus didn't know, it was that He didn't care. 'Then
He said to her, 'Your sins are forgiven.'' (Luke 7:48 NKJV) Then He
gives us the bottom line: '...to whom little is forgiven, the same
loves little.' (Luke 7:47 NKJV) And what should our response to God's
love be? 'This is love for God: to obey his commands...' (1 John 5:3
NIV)
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Friday, December 04, 2009
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I've
been writing this blog now for just over 4 years, and I still find
myself amazed and humbled at the fact that people want to read what I
have to say. I actually publish this through Blogger, Facebook and
Myspace, and there are a number of readers from each site. I started
blogging, really, more for me than anything. I have found it theraputic
to vent my thoughts. It was never really about others reading in the
beginning. Now, I find that I have regular readers from around the world. In fact, about 1 of every 4 readers is outside the United States. It just blows my mind.
This picture is a screen shot of a map showing where my readers have
logged on from today. This is just the readers on Blogger.
I just think it is so cool to see this every day.
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Friday, December 04, 2009
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 Haven't
been feeling well, so this morning I've just been resting and watching
TV. Found one of my favorite old shows on, "The Beverly Hillbillies"
on. (After 44 years, this show still holds up.) Anyway, in this
episode, Jed is feeling useless and decides to start doing handiman
work for people free of charge, just so that he feels like he is useful
and doing something. Mr. Drysdale decides that what Jed needs is a
hobby, and he sets out trying to find something that Jed will enjoy
doing. He shows him a ship in a bottle that it took Mr. Cushman 3 years
to build. Jed see's this as wasting a ship and a bottle, not to mention
a waste of 3 years. He presents him with the idea of stamp collecting
and he thinks it's entirely too expensive to
write letters at that price. Then he shows him a coin collection and a
dime that the owner paid $12,000 for. Jed says, "Your friend got
snookered!" Mr. Drysdale explains that the dime was very old, very rare
and worth the price. Jed says, "If you put that dime into one of those
candy machines, would it give you $12,000 worth of candy?" Drysdale
tells him that it would only give a dimes worth. Jed tells him that he
needs to go help his friend because he needs help because he got
snookered.
 As
I'm watching this, the thought hit me how many people have been
"snookered" in life. They have things that they value, even treasure
and they've placed their trust in these things or activities.
I've
often said that I think the idea of paying the prices that people pay
for diamonds, pearls, so called "precious stones" and so on is just
stupid. It's a rock! It's a piece of sand that got into a clam that was
unwanted. The only reason a diamond is worth that much is because
someone, somewhere decided they could charge that much for it. Tomorrow
we could wake up to find that someone has decided diamonds are
worthless and they would be. We could be told that now our money is
worthless, and it would be. Don't think so? Hold on awhile and you will
find out. I remember just a few years ago when Germany went to the Euro
and those who had chosen to hold on to Marks found out that they were
no longer of value. Just like that, it was not worth the price of the
paper it was printed on.
Right now, people are being advised to buy
gold. The price of gold has sky rocketed. But what will that gold buy
you if gold is declared illegal to own once again? Having all the gold
in the world would mean nothing if you could not trade it. People are
putting their trust in gold, silver, diamonds, stock and bonds... and
they are being snookered. No, I'm not saying that we should not prepare
for the future financially, but I'm thinking of the big picture. What
about the real future?
What about eternity? The reality is that a man may be a billionaire and
own houses and lands, jewels and gold, and still be absolutely without
hope. They may be the most famous person in the world; someone whose
face is known around the world... but if they are not known by Jesus,
then they've been snookered!
Let me finish this with the words to one of my favorite old songs:
I’d rather have Jesus than silver or gold;
I’d rather be His than have riches untold;
I’d rather have Jesus than houses or lands,
I’d rather be led by His nail pierced hand.
Than to be a king of a vast domain
Or be held in sin’s dread sway,
I’d rather have Jesus than anything
This world affords today.
I’d rather have Jesus than men’s applause;
I’d rather be faithful to His dear cause;
I’d rather have Jesus than world-wide fame,
I’d rather be true to His holy name.
He’s fairer than lilies of rarest bloom;
He’s sweeter than honey from out of the comb;
He’s all that my hungering spirit needs,
I’d rather have Jesus and let Him lead.
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