What's going On?

1. Since Early spring 2008 we have taken time out to write new material, along with Dave switching to Guitar and Blair switching to bass.

2. We have a new self titled EP which will be released June 2008. This has the brand new material and will be starting with :

EP launch gig at the Swan with 2 Necks on June 20th, along with ALL IDOLS FALL and THE LIVING DAYLIGHTS

We've ordered a load of new t-shirts stickers and badges so make sure you get yours when you come to the gig which coincidently is probably the last time youll see us this year because of......

3. Recently we have had the news that Craig, the drummer is having important surgery on his shoulder, having dislocated it 1 too many times. He will have this on the 3rd of July and we will be out of action for at least 5 months, during which we will continue to write new stuff.

See you on the 20th

Alright people so it's that time again. Usual October where we pack our woolies and pick axes and head north into unchartered teritory we like to call Nova Scotia. Setting off thursday afternoon fulltime made a linford Christie style sprint back from Coventry to catch the Smokey Express, where Jon and Blair were already on board with Craig and Dave being picked up in the ghetto of Salford.

We are still at the house when the 1st school boy error has been made. Jonny in his excited state cracks open the crate of beers at the side of Smokey only for them to crash onto the floor with 3 spraying across the car park. You can imagine the three of us, supin through the tiny holes in the sides of the can, with fulltime having particular trouble and catching an eyeful in the process. From here it only got worse with the journey to salford taking about an hour and a half. Arrive at Dave's though we did and as he came out the house Jonny was on hand for the first "Big Brother" camera filming episode of the trip.

From now it was plain sailing and Dav the leg-end that he is drove the whole way with several piss stops on the way and one game of service station football during which Blair tore off his top to reveal a Brazil shirt and yes, it was just like watching brazil. Jon and Lamps had now been supping for a while and fulltime was already starting to giggle.

On arrival it was mealtime and even a few wife beater Stella's were cracked out but everything passed peacefully. Morning time and as usual Jonny is up first and then film's Dave awakening whilst cradling his box of "Daves Frosties" and his latest cop of womens weekly. Bowling was the call made and it was decided that winner gets a free pint of everyone. The outcome was never in doubt after Wilkie nailed the strike on his 1st go so its free beer tonight for me. The main highlight however occured in the next lane, as our neighbour, who was no stranger to the chip shop flung himself down the lane in a Klinsmann-esque style dive only for EEEEEERRRRRGGGGHHHHH, foul to be called. Outragous! 

On to the gig and we arrive in Dundee, the place of Blair's birth which he is genuinly excited about. On route a lady walks really slowly in front of Smokey at the roundabout with a blink, you had to be there but it was just awful. The venue itself did exactly what it said on the tin, it was a bar with a Balcony. Small room downstairs with the band set up in the corner and then another area upstairs with netting over the gap. Was a good crowd in and local boys Fragile played a stormer. Blair had already recognised a few faces in the crowd and  a few old reminises were had. The gig went well and there was more action to come.

As we were taking stuff outside to smokey all hell broke loose. Police Riot Van and about 3 po po cars and and ambulance to break up a scrap between some girls and some guys. Lampard runs out rightly pointing out "we could get on Street Crime Uk, get here quick". As we are watching one of the lassies involved took a disliking to Jon's watchful eye and launched into a verbal assault on Jonny. Not knowing what was being said at him, Jon started laughing and then decided the best option was to run away. God call Jon!

On route back with Blair piloting the Smokester we pull in for "slashy break" for Jon only to be followed into the lay bye. Dave is already cracking his knuckles in the hope of a scrap but horror it's the Police again.After a quick licence and insurance check, they decided we were legite and allowed us on our way but with Blair's ticker beating a bit faster than normal.

Saturday and Zoo time was called.Edinburgh zoo in all its glory. We went round and saw some quality stuff. Penguins were particular favourites, although lampard was keen on the polar bear, while the blatant lack of Pumas only upset Blair. Party time was to follow and after dropping the stuff of at Uncle Silk's we headed for Monster Mash.This place is the dogs ballierics, so good that we were told an hour and a half for a table. No problem, that's drinking time, so it was of to Pub 1. Onto Pub 2 and Lampard is now visably upset. On ordering at the bar he is ID'd, fair do's but when asked for it again a second later, it's wearing thin. After seemingly getting past this we are stood at the other side of the pub and again he is asked. By this time the conversation is rated 18, as the air turns blue. he guy get's the jist and doesn't ask again. Pub 3 is a stinger at £3 a pint but now it's food time. Sausages including Haggis and Whisky and Medditeranian are called along with fulltimes Chips and coleslaw! By this point its off to meet Silk. We get to the "Pear Tree" and it's as if we are in Gay Paris, France are beating the all blacks and it's party time all round. Next is the downfall of Dave and Jon with 3 pints for a £5. We watched Man Utd on the telly and the toilet cubicle is totally covered in pictures of Boobies. Bag on. Now its opium and off to Edinburgh Rock club. This is the point where Jon and Dave's memory shuts down for the night and when we leave Jon is found half a mile away on George IV bridge with no idea how he got there. On sunday morning it was a late awakening. After Blair, silk and Dave went looking for a bacon buttie to no avail, we set off for a good hearty dinner. Sunday dinner went down a storm and we set off for Dumbarton. With Blair in charge of the sat nav there were a few school boy errors and wrong turns a plenty. Jon and Lampard carried on the fun game of "Elliott", which involves wetting your finger in Beer and rubbing it on anothers face whilst saying Elliott, E.T style. Believe me its better than it sounds, give it a bash. We arrived in what seemed to be the middle of nowhere but then went inside the recording studio which was pretty awesome. Big stage and then just a big room with some comical scottish drunks thrown in for good measure. 

As it was a studio it was bring your own cans so we went to the Offy and got some Tenants. Dave the designated driver for the night came out with the line "I'll have to have another one as there is nothing else to drink", which i think would have gone down a stormer with PC Plod. After visiting Mr Kebab and Lampard announcing he was going veggie (again) we went back to watch Mutley who played a sweet set and we also played pretty well with a few comical moments from Blair's vocal chords. The drive home was good with the best game of service station football yet. Craig's skills lead us to believe he may actually have been born in Brazil. A good bit of Kippy and by the time Dave and Craig got up we had alrady watched the Bourne Identity and Basic Instanct 2.

Into Smokey and we are on the home straight. We set off following Betty who takes us into the middle of no where (where we saw a few murc'd foxes and badgers) through cattle grids and tiny country lanes, the tranquility was ruined however with Daves decision to parp a flock of sheep which resulted in a Planet Earth style stampede across the plains. After the excitement died down within the van we eventually arrived back in civilisation. A stop off at Burger King, where Lampard keeps up his "I'm a veggie" routine and we are now well on the way back to drop Dave off in Salford, and the rest return to the humble of home of Maccy.

From last October, our merch guy and extra guitarist has done an ace blog about, we didn't feel it was getting enough viewage so here it is, upgraded to our site!

Alot of the pics taken were either to homo erotic or everyone had the same pose so heres a few.there only from the last night in Glasgow because i didnt think to take my camera out til then(that mite have been a good thing)but just a few from shuffle on tour!

Glasgow.

So the gig got canclled, so course the only option left was to go and get wasted. with the help of a 20 sided dice around 6 or 7 pints each and 3 bottles of wine it didnt take long.

the horror!

Before we went out. 

Oh no! the vinos out

Id say it went wrong about it here!

Being drunk is fun

yes im lay down on the floor outside a takeway.

hoovering the streets of Glasgow was fun. im wearing daves coat if your wondering why its so big, hes left it in the place.

 

Quick jonny get a strepsil!

i seem to be lovin this abit too much!only dave and blair slept in the bed so dont worry.

Way home

Good ol service stations.

when we realised the exhaust had snapped off

oh yeah and...

this blog was alot better the first time i made it but it got deleted so couldnt be arsed again.

The next gig we're playing is in leicester on the 7th april in memory of Callum Howell guitarist of MCD who tragically passed away last year. The line up is incredible with A New Days Enemy making a special 2 gig comeback and MCD playing with a stand in guitarist especially for this gig. Hope to see you all there for whats shaping up to be an awesome gig!!!

Welcome to 2007,

As we are away to re-stock our merchandise, we have a few old "classics" that we are selling off and these will be discontinued. The items up for grabs are as follows:

T-SHIRTS:

RISE OR FALL DESIGN - £4
Small Male - 1 left
Medium Male - 3 left
Small Female - 2 left
Medium Female - 3 left

WHITE SHUFFLE CARD DESIGN - £4
Small Male - 1 left
Large Male - 2 left
Small Female - 2 left
Medium Female - 4 left
Large Female - 1 left

MONKEY SHUFFLE DESIGN - £4
Medium Male - 1 left
Medium Female - 3 left
Small Male (white) - 1 left
Medium Female (white) - 1 left
+
(£1.50 p+p)

1 Large Hoodie - £5
+
(£2 p+p)

First come, first serve basis. Please e-mail us + we'll sort out payment etc. If you know your coming to one our gigs soon we can reserve it for you (so you don't have to pay postage!)

It is here, the day of reckoning, the wait is over, it's showtime. Bleary eyed but raring to go Dave and Craig pick up Blair & Fulltime in Tythy, it's 7:30am, it's high fives all round and somewhat over enthusiastic smiles! Wait a minute, Franklin has forgotten his skateboard, disaster already so he is already off running back down the road, a schoolboy error at this early stage. We go and get Jon & Stu while fulltime gets his board, fill up smokey and by the time all 6 are in there is a sense of jubilation in the air. (we haven't even done anything yet!)

We are heading to the M6, slicing through the rush hour traffic like Schumi, Jon, Stu, Craig and fulltime crack open the 1^{st of many tour beers, it's 8am. By 9:30am Franklins second error of the day arrives when he has not gone through the required toilet procedure before leaving home and a No2 stop is required. This gives the rest a time for a tidy of the already messy smokey, a cup of tea and Stu is on his 1st Cornetto! The 1st pics of the tour are taken.}

Onward we march and our arrival to Scotland is captured with a photo of us all thumbs up next to the Welcome to Scotland Sign! A crucial point of the tour is missing so it's a stop at the outlet village to purchase 2 footballs. Our first service station football game is had. Dave bumps into "an old flame", although he claims it was just some guy he used to work nights with at M&S at Handforth! Small world. After the purchase of some Cadbury mis-shapes that didn't make their cut of Cadbury perfection, we are back on the road with Blair in the pilot seat!

Another service stop outside Glasgow for a proper kick about, some bog roll was had from the toilets, you know just in case, and smokey has left his 1st suspicious oil stain!

6:30pm and we arrive in Aberdeen, yes that's right 10 and a half hours later! It's a sweet venue, met Steve the promoter, quality guy who brought us some nice butties, sausage rolls and a healthy banana. Smokey ran out of juice outside the venue so Franklin and Dave were dispatched to obtain more. Just before the gig Jon, whilst taking a toilet break, overheard and I quote " Apparently the Shuffle are big news", someone knows there stuff! All the bands are awesome, Civic Might, Contra and MCD all play storming sets. We play a good show to a decent crowd, considering Napalm Death are on 2 doors down! This gig included a comical yet frightening moment when a guy got down to his boxers and jumped on stage during "We Live, We Learn" and proceeded to hump us all like wild dogs, a strange and not very nice experience, plus bloody hard to play guitar like that too! After the gig we went with Steve to Club "Scream" where some hardcore dance moves were busting out left right and centre. Stu seemed to get kicked out the club, not sure about that one, whilst the rest oversaw some girls having a good smooch, alright! We also at the end of this somehow managed to get a place to stay in Glasgow on the Monday through a phone call to someone called Euan? Think that was through buzzing with Joanne….?

We then went on a mammoth but well worth while treck to a 24 hour bakery! There were meat and tattie pies, sausage rolls, cheeseburgers and Pizza's all round, it was awesome. We then set off for Steve's flat with his mate, During the night Dave did seem to enjoy picking up fulltime and turning him upside down, this was an amusing site coupled with Craig and fulltime riding bareback on a lion (statue). So to Steve's, where we settle down with 7 in the living room. Just before sleep was entered the question was asked by Blair, "Just out of curiosity what is your name, guy on the couch?" Brian, came the response, we went to sleep satisfied with the response. 21 hrs awake, 3:50am, Shuffle on tour.

Awake at 9am, had some water all round for the old de-hydration, had a buzz with Steve, quality lad, will work with him again I hope. Said our good byes and went to the venue to collect our gear. Taking Dave's 12 stone cab down 6 flights was not what any of us needed at this time! Breakfast of bacon butties and steak pasties were had at the mall, smoothies and that all important cup of tea. Some commotion was bubbling near by so we set out to investigate. We returned fully decked out in witches hats and capes, as the result of buying the local paper, bargain! This look seemed to attract some suspicious looks in HMV, not sure why?

Set of for Kirckaldy, somehow nearly ended up in the North Sea, our fellow transport were big mothers of fishing trawlers and oil tankers! Nice straight forward journey and we stopped of in Wormit, where Blair grew up. We saw his old houses, school and haunts however At this point Jon informed Blair "he showed little or no interest in his past", the cheek! We went to the park as you do, Dave helped the local community by untangling the swings and we all had way too much fun on the swinging horse, which was far too hardcore despite is sounding quite gay! Stu, Jon and Craig dipped in for the inevitable Cornetto from Keith's store however this seemed to send Craig west. From there to Kirckaldy, and the Path Tavern. During the wait before we set up, CITV was invented. Can in the Van, which funnily enough involves drinking a can in the back of our lovely carpeted back section of Smokey. I can see many a night spent using the CITV method. The gig was a poor turn out but The Shuffle showed their true colours, rocking it out to the max, winning over the small but appreciative crowd! The night was made all the more interesting by MCD's comical sidekick "Chunky". Derek enquired "how did you get that name" Chunky was all over the place having be-friended 6 ltrs of Cider and latterly the floor of the venue and the pavement outside. This was in between constant outbursts of Fuck you " and the touching up of Fulltime, much to Franklins visible disgust. We left him KO'd on the back seat of their car. The short drive back to Big Russ' was swell as we were all buzzing. A bottomless bowl of Chilli followed, by 3am several bottles and cans of Tennant and Millers led to several of Dave's Theories being discussed. Blair also took this time to mention to everyone that he had recently questioned his brothers sexuality, having found out he had not had an alcoholic beverage for over 4 months! So to sleep but not before Craig showed his hardcoreness by watching The Davinci Code till 5:50am!

Good breakfast followed, again Bacon rolls, Weetabix and numerous cups of tea. Dave and Blair went for a spin in big Russ' old school classic MG and got in some supplies from Tesco. Filled up Smokey with some Juice, and butties for the journey for us. Arrived in Edinburgh after Smokey successfully negotiated the Forth Bridge. Parked up and first stop was the pub where we reminisced about the delights of Chunky's supreme drunken state again. This before we met Silk, (Blair's bro) who was our host for the evening and dropped the gear off and went flyering round the capital. Buzzed some people up in Edinburgh which included Craig having a phone conversation with some girl called Isla in an Irish Accent, that he seems to think that all Blair's relatives speak with, the dunce! We went to the venue for a quick pint then got all the gear in, including the bag with the booze for the after show party, more on that later tho. In the 3 and a half hours that followed boredom got the better of us. Taking the theme from the tour, "There he is . . . " was created. This could even be incorporated into the CITV but we will get back to you on that one. The rules of the game were a 20 sided dicewas rolled. We were numbered 1-6, so you had 3 numbers each and 19 and 20 were communal. If your number was rolled you drank, if it was your low number, i.e your 1-6, you were given a metal screw which was a toilet pass, and only if this was obtained was a toilet stop permitted. This game continued for 20+ pints, which in fairness probably inpaired our ability to rock out to our full potential. We were joined in the pub by a few of Silk's Uni mates and Mr Legless who bought 3 pints and drank about a third of one, in between falling over, falling asleep and forgetting he was awake! He was also the target of our now free flowing "Oh, there he is!!!"

The gig was a strange one, including some Manchester heckling and 2 Mics being stolen from us, we dealt with this very well and Dave even offered a handshake for the guys troubles, only to be met with a childish neh, neh, neh, neh, neh gesture! the Swine! We played a few encores and Fulltime sprang into action selling CD's and shirts left, right and centre. So to the after show party which was at one of Silk's mates house, (this was really just a party that we gate crashed, and not set up specially for us although the thought would have been nice!). We got a taxi outside next to the guy stood topless and actually doing the universal shiver shaking dance manouver to make it all the more ridiculous. We arrived beer and vino in tact, after the bell end taxi driver dropped us at the wrong end of a country mile. The New York themede party was rocking with hot pants, The Beastie Boys and even Mike & The Mechanics making an appearance. The Beer flowed and then didn't coz we ran out so onto the Vino went Jon and Blair. This led to some of the quality dance moves discovered in Aberdeen resurfacing, much to the joy of our fellow party goers! Michael Jackson, Madonna and even the Pussy Cat Dolls were no match for our moves, though I have a funny feeling that Blair & Jon may have just sung the Pussy Cat Dolls and they were never actually on the stereo. The only downer of the night being Blair's constant requests for Panic at the Disco being blatently ignored! By this time it is 4:40am and Craig and Stu are visibly upset, the taxi was called and Craig was asleep in about ten seconds of head to pillow. Dave and Fulltime however had other ideas and went for a skate round the capital intil 6am, hardcore lads.

Another good breaky, by this time we are on about our 10th Pig, (sorry Tim). Collected our gear from the 3 Tuns and loaded the van in record time, we are getting Pro's at this milarchy! Easy trip to Dundee until we drove past the venue 3 times. 2 Flights of stairs was another soul shattering sight with Dave's stupid cab in toe!We set up and Dexters was ace. Blair (the promoter) and the landlords had russled us up butties, crisps, cans and a crate of Millers. Again all really good bands, Jon was struggling with the pace of life in the fast lane at this point but to be fair to the lad, he spruced himself up with a few laps round the block! After the gig, the rest thought it would be funny to hide Blair's van keys, until he found them mysteriously appear in his bag the next morning! The Poofs. Back to Blair's for a pint which going with the stupid amounts of alcohol we had consumed on tour seemed like a swell idea. There was no mention at this point tho of going up everest as part of the route, but Smokey came out a stronger man! I think he even did the Rocky dance at the top of the hill. (imagine the Rocky theme in your head at this point!)

On arrival we were greeted by the physco cat who took Stu's finger for a succulent bowl of Feelix. It also had a horribly disgusted long stare at Jon too, not sure what that was about tho. On leaving the flat Blair's route out via the Boiler cupboard was to no avail. Back to big Riss' and another hot meal, this aint exactly punk rock by the book, but i like it! We watched the gig back on DVD and there was some unbeleivable choreography going on from Blair and Jon on stage, something I think they have been working on for quite some time!

A Late awakening and it was off to Glasgow, having refilled Smokey with some juice. We are inches from the venue but Blair can't wait and an old derelict building get's it of you know what I mean. We are there, the most haunted bar in Glasgow, the Spirit Bar THE HORROR! At this point we are told by the promoter that the venue is double booked! We reckon they were all scared to play. To top that right outside there is a poster that states "The Shuffle's Blair framed for Murder" THE HORROR!!!!

Back up plan was the cry, shocked looking faces and silent words the reply. Craig's old mate Mackers stepped in like a leg end and saved the day, let's get pissed! So to Pizza Hut which left us all ruined from the free Pepsi top ups and then into the Waterfly, Live bands and a buzzing atmosphere, we just had to crack out the old "there he is....." dice game. This lasted about 3 hours and we were leathered. Blair, Jon and Stu busted more moves on the dance floor while Franklin won a £10 bet with Blair too! Gutted. Craig and Dave had vanished. Oh dear oh dear. We did meet up later, after Franklin had fpound a hoover on the street and entertained passers by with his household skills in between lying on the pavement whilst eating his burgereo! Him and Blair also found time to get their asses out, see Franklins myspace for the snaps! We found Dave throwing some shit about the streets, we had a bit of a heated debate, drink fuelled like and then 4:30am back to Mackers. At this point far too much gay behaviour was coming from Dave and Fulltime and toff is the worst at whispering in the world ever, 6am was the last I saw, not a coumfy night! Round Glasgow the next day, watched some magician and buzzed up the internet in Virgin Megastore! This after Mackers had played a storm with the full cooked breaky ( Pig number 12 gone). To Rufus T Firefly, our venue tonight, We soundchecked and met up with some old friends from last trip up north. We played a strong 2nd slot with dave and Jon's voices on the brink we lasted well and came out Swinging as the song says. We stayed around to reminise on what had been an awesome time on the whole. Everyone was trying it on with Smokey, he just shrugs it off tho. We set out of Glasgow making the fatal error of Craig on Map reading duties which leads to a 20 mile circle till we are back on route. We are in the lakes when a noise arises form Sir Smokeys bonnet. We stop and sus out his mud flap is causing the problem, we perform a quick op under local anisthetic and back on the road. A few miles later and the problem sounds a little more serious so we stop at a service station to find the exhaust snapped in 2! At this point Craig redeems himself for his poor map reading and him and Dave to a storming job of fixing Smokey with Clips, Glue and foil. At this time Fulltime has gone into overdrive and his very best impression of Takeshi's "Ah Sambareema" is captured on what will long be a truly memorable video. This in between making strawberry and shit condoms out of milkshake, crushed digestives and see through garage inflatable gloves. By This time it's 4:30am and drum and bass is all the way home much to Blair's disgust. We make it with Dave being a legend at the wheel, Blair was still falling asleep even after he had breached the 2000% barrier of his recomended daily allowance of vitamin B12, via Red Bull and Kick.

There were weary good byes and hand shakes at the drop offs and sleep for a whole day was required. Next stop Oxjam

Home comforts surround us as we arrive at the Swan for our Oxjam gig that Dave and the band have set up as their homecoming gig. Panic sets in as we realise we have no idea who is turning up when and how this is actually going to work with 12 bands on the list. However what a day, starting with Andy Hughes at 4pm right through to The Shuffle's set at 11pm, live music in Macc has never had it so good. Andy and Wendy played a storm, them and their staff keeping hundreds of punters refreshed and fed through out the day. Wages were donated, raffles drawn and drinking challenges completed to round off an amazing day. 10 acts, hundreds of Pints, pissed people on stage (you know who you are) and £531 raised for Oxfam! One to go.

Retro bar is final destination when we placed among Ska Bar;s finest for it's 2nd Birthday, The Crowd don't seem to be too concerned at our lack of ska and with fulltime on stage on guitar for State of Emergency, the crowd are loving it. Birthday cake, glow sticks and numerous chants/games of "SHOOT FROM THE SHEEP" a game where you drink shots from an inflatable sheeps ass, with Sean and Diesel, the 2 craziset bastards we have ever met.