To Whom it May Concern:

This blog is definitely the first in a long time. No matter, there are plenty of other blogs to be read and our time in this world is short, so if you're reading this, I hope that you get something out of it.

I was in my African American Literature class the other day and we were reading a selection from Cornel West's out of print book Beyone Multi-Culturalism and Eurocentrism, and although my neurons are always dancing in that class, the sun burst through the clouds of my thoughts and I had a realization. Cornel West talks about Prophetic thought and the four ideas that it hinges upon. It is at that point that I noticed that these four pillars were very similar to the four noble truths that Buddhism is based upon. For those of you that have not been informed on what these truths are: 1. The Nature of Suffering, 2. The Origin of Suffering, 3. The Cessation of Suffering, and 4. The Path that leads to the Cessation of suffering. To me, this synchronicity was not entirely surprising, because these truths exist also as the basis of a deeply conscious analytical process. Cornel West strikes me as a deeply conscious man that does not let subjects that are important to him sit in clouds of smoke, but reaches under, around, above, below and every other direction to understand a subject. It is then and only then that I think that you are not subject to your own mind's speculation and biases that lead you back into ignorance. And even then, the concept will still be somewhat fluid and deserves revisiting with the new understanding and wisdom that you aquire over the years of your life. It seems to me that without that fluidity your understanding of anything will always be skewed, and your knowledge will be crushed under the weight of your own stagnation. And while a stagnation of your thoughts in one field or regarding one concept hinders your understanding, and stagnation of your thought process is a death (in my opinion). The strength of your perspicacity lies in its ability to adapt and incorporate new processes, to link up new nerons in your brain, to rewire the ones that are already working, to bring back to life ones that you've lost, and to allow it to flourish into infinity like a fractal.

This brings me to my main point, my realization and the ideal that I think should be shared by all of us. If science has not slapped us in the face with the reworkings of every single theory that has ever been presented, then certainly your own life and experience should yield you this same conclusion: to continue to exist and understand the world that you live in, you need to be able to face each new nuance and variation of old and new concepts differently. In the medical community, this is a necessity. There are a number of viruses that adapt and change when they are presented with a threat and consequently the solutions to these viruses have to be thought about in new ways for them to be even controlled or understood. I mean, how many times has something been discovered by accident that completely revolutionized the way that we thought about things? But enough about that. My point is that in my meditation upon the reflection of the Four Noble Truths in Cornel West's writing made me realize the nature of my thought process. It is easiest to notice this in class. I am constantly trying to make connections between different concepts and incorporate these conclusions into my world view. This process is partly natural to me and to everyone, but I also feel that my analytical nature and my exposure to Buddhist thought have yielded a different frequency. I feel that in the inner workings of my brain a desire for synchronicity and oneness of the universe under the umbrella of fluidity have given me a massive foundation in the deepest part of my being. It because of my desire to maintain this center that my brain is constantly working to give a sense of oneness of humanity and of the universe. But, because everything in this universe is a construct, nothing has inherent nature. This means that although I have built this massive foundation, it does yield a concrete "I". My philosophy is fluidity and not stagnation. So although this foundation does exist, it is also a construct of my thought process of fluidity. It is dismantled withought my consciousness and thought process. It is solid but only in regards to its inchoate nature. It is only because it is alive and breathing that it exists. It is for this that I am thankful... not only for the fact that my thought process works like this, but thankful for fact that I realized this and that I can appreciate it instead of fighting it or pushing it away. In scope that I have fashioned, I will try to view the world with love as it is a part of myself and a part of you and everyone and everything else.

I was smoking outside today and my cigarette broke. I wish that I had been thinking about something but I wasn't. My profoundly unprofound mind was not inside or wrapped around an idea or mission statement that I could hold on to. Analogous to where I am. I've been pulling smoke inside myself and I don't know why. I have been falling down over and over again and I don't know why; I don't even know what I have been holding on to that makes me do it. There must be a reason why I am so comfortable with this right now, so comfortable with not being paranoid......It's like purpose has escaped from every single pore of my conscious body and all that is true to me that I fight for is just a coping mechanism for.....

Oweing to my lurid disposition,
this cracked concrete slab,
has smiled on me,

Where have I been?
we have not seen a single soul,
auspicious as the road looked,
not a single one,

we haven't lived long enough,
seldom found fault in the wounds of
capricious times,

It feels so good not to be in a black hole anymore, god I was tired of feeling shitty.

I was reading an interview with the Mars Volta about their new album and what the songs were about, and Cedric threw out this name. I looked up articles on the internet and Maricica was a 23 year old nun from Romania who died of dehydration when the head priest of the monestary as well as a few other nuns tied her to a couple of planks of wood in the shape of a cross. They believed that she was possessed and that they were using remedies and exorcism rites that were passed on through oral tradition. Nowhere in any of the articles that I read did it say anything about the people standing up for her rights. I mean, maybe it was just not printed, but all of the people that commented on it from that parrish said that she really was possessed and that they were basically on the priest's side.
        Anyway, I found this to be absolutely fucking crazy. It's not so much that they were performing exorcisms on someone that was diagnosed schizofrenic (I probably spelled that wrong), but that everyone believed that she was possessed and didn't seem to have a problem with the sort of treatment that they were giving her. However, this was huge news in Romania, I mean, there must have been some serious backlash for this to get the headlines that it did. But apparently this problem stems from the fact that in the soviet bloc, officially, everyone was an athiest. So, since Romania has been free to practice their religion (a large percentage of the people being orthodox christian), they have had to build their monestaries and churches fast. This brings the need for monks and priests and nuns, and if these people are needed fast, then the tests for becoming a priest will be less strict in the name of expediency. Well, as you can see, this causes a problem.....you have people seriously unqualified to do their job. You end up having people that will impose superstitions and headstrong beliefs about satan and how to rid the world of him and these communities listening and putting faith in these people. Personally I already think that christianity is quite backwards, and I especially think that homegrown superstitious christianity is backwards. The sad thing is that people actually believe this shit and are willing to defend it. It's just ridiculous.
          What is it about us that makes us so fucking out of our minds. What is it about humans that makes us have to have a constant fight between good and evil? I mean, there is so much distruction and hatred and ignorant animosity that could be so easily avoided by just dropping your fucking comfort blanket and looking at the real picture. I mean, this kind of shit is ridiculous. We live in the south, the land where televangelists actually have some sort of clout in the thought process of a lot of peoples lives. I mean it's just crazy what kind of fear that a lot of people around the world live in over something that they have no proof exists. I mean, take someone who has been completely cut off from religion from their birth and have them listen to a televangelist and see what he thinks. I don't know about you, but sometimes I get so fed up with how ridiculous people think.