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Dr. Melissa

Melissa Moler Beery


Last Updated: 11/21/2009

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Gender: Female
Status: In a Relationship
Age: 85
Sign: Capricorn

City: Alaska
State: Nebraska
Country: US

Blog Archive
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May 14, 2006 - Sunday 

The Smell on the Church Bus

 

My mom made me have Holly sleep over one Saturday night,

and she slept all night on my cat instead,

and killed it.

 

Theres something wrong with your cat,

she said, pointing to his stiff body, stiffer than

any other dead thing I ever came across, stiffer than

dead birds, a bat in the alley, a skeletal fluff

of something near the edge of our street,

and some squirrels.

 

I didnt want to touch him, not because he was dead,

but because I could tell his petrified, raised paws

tried to push her large body off his and

because I knew he had to have smelled her until

he died, all his breaths breathing in that smell,

until it rubbed off on his fur and he smelled liked her.

 

I still had to go to church. Everyone knew

if I wasnt there, since my dad was a deacon

and also drove the Church Bus.

Dad made me sit by Holly that Sunday,

as if her killing my cat wasnt enough.

She hummed a tune I didnt recognize until

I told her she smelled like shit.

May 14, 2006 - Sunday 

Current mood:  drunk
Category: Parties and Nightlife

I have learned a couple of things.  I learned today that if you have never worn panty hose since you were ten and called them, "tights" that you DO NOT attempt these at home 1/2 hour before giving a speech at gradutation.  Yes, I barely got them on because of a miracle. 

Instead of the gradutation speech I gave (see earlier blog), I should have said screw it all, and where are the dollar bills?  I have to say it was fun though.  The boys made me give out dollar bills all night, even though I refused a lap dance.  I HAVE NEVER ATTEMPTED THIS BEFORE.  I wasn't sure where to put the dollar bill.  Hahahah. Yep.  It was funny.   Yes, it was a had to be there.  Thanks Aaron, Chad, and Kelly for all your experience in this department.

May 13, 2006 - Saturday 

Graduation Speech for Pharmacy Class 2006

 

I remember the very first day of our first pharmacy class in G9 and I sincerely believed the next four years were going to last a lifetime.  And then when Mr. Hospodka walked through the doorway and first spoke to us in front of that classroom, and I thought I could not meet a more intimidating person, I finally admitted I was truly scared.  I had no idea if I was really cut out to be a pharmacist.  I thought to myself, how am I going to make a difference? And I believed that now one would remember me anyway.  I could take any job and make a fair living.  But thats when I also realized that I had in front of me an opportunity that many will never experience.  Regardless of my personal fears, I embraced the opportunity, and that first year I also persuaded you to vote for me as your Class President.  I promised that the road ahead of us would me made easier, and that we would be remembered as the class of the voice of the individual, the class that makes a difference.  As a class, in many ways, we have already accomplished our goal.  Tonight, I read to you a poem written by Charles Bukowski.

 

The 12 hour night

I found myself in middle age
working a 12 hour night,
night after night,
year after year
and somehow there seemed to be
no way out.

I was drained, empty and so
were my co-workers.
we huddled together
under the whip,
under intolerable conditions,
and many of us were
fearful of being
fired
for there was nothing left
for us.
our bodies were worn,
our spirits whipped.

there was a sense
of unreality.
one becomes so tired one
becomes so dazed,
that there is confusion and
anguish mixed in with the
deadliness.

I think that, too,
kept some of us working there.

I wasted over a decade of
12 hour nights.
I can't explain why I
remained.
cowardice, probably.

then one night I stood up
and said,
"I'm finished, I'm leaving
this job now!"

"what? what? what?"
asked my comrades.

"do you know what you're doing?"

"where will you go?"

"come back!"

"you're crazy! what will
you do?"

I walked down the rows
of them, all those faces.
I walked down the aisle
past rows and rows of
them,
all the faces looking.

"he's crazy!"

then I was in the elevator
riding down.
first floor and out.
I walked into the street,
I walked along the street,
then I turned and looked
at the towering
buildings, four stories high,
I saw the lights in the
windows,
I felt the presence of
those 3,000 people
in there.

then I turned and walked away
into the night.

and my life was touched by
magic.

and it still
is.

 

Unlike Bukowski, we dont have to worry about meaningless, empty work.  All of us who will be graduating tomorrow have been given a gift, where we will continue to give back to our communities.  Many have exciting careers ahead of us, and one thing that I hope you have learned from this class of 2006 is that we care about the individual.  Its the individual patient, whether in community, hospital, wherever.  The individual is the common denominator that makes us professionals when we choose to continue to honor our Pharmacy Oath.  Our 12 hour nights have a purpose, meaning, and we are lucky for that opportunity.  However, many of our patients will never have had the same opportunity, yet they will still be our patients.  Why?  Because our profession is built on empathy and trust.  Creighton, this Jesuit institution has helped each one of us discover the very meaning of these words in our own way, with our own path.  And by just fulfilling our roles as pharmacists, we can also help our patients realize their own purpose, just like Bukowski did when he walked out those factory doors.  We are now.  We will continue to leave our mark and make a better world for the individual.  And to my father who came straight from his own 12 hour nights because of his four children:  I am so proud to be standing up here.  Standing up here today, I represent you as well, and anyone else with 12 hour nights with a dream and inspiration:  You too can make a difference, and thank you for helping each one of us realize our potential.  Turns out those 4 years will last a lifetime for each and every one of us.  We have already been touched by magic.  I wish all the graduates good luck tomorrow, and the very best in all that you do.  May God bless you.

May 13, 2006 - Saturday 

Category: Writing and Poetry

The Fall of 1982

 

In the fall I notice more than anything

the smell of the cooling earth and pumpkins,

and its the same

smell I remember as a kid

when my sister and I buried ourselves

in a huge pile of brilliant, dead leaves,

back in the Fall of 1982,

when her red hair was even brighter,

back when everything wasnt perfect,

like the picture my mom took of her

smiling from under the leaf pile,

when I could tell from her smile that she forgot

the neighbor girls wouldnt play with us,

and how she had to endure her glasses,

and my old Wal-Mart jeans,

in the same way we wished penny counting days

would get buried and pushed down,   

with everything else that was slowly going into hibernation,

so that under those dead leaves,

Fall actually meant something new.

May 12, 2006 - Friday 

Category: Jobs, Work, Careers
I am scared to death.  I have a speech.  Let's not forget the speech.
May 12, 2006 - Friday 

Current mood:  drained
Category: Writing and Poetry

This is my favorite ALL time piece EVER written by ANYBODY.  I swear.  Thank God for Charles Bukowski.  I certainly am a big fan of his lately...hmmmm.  Either I am on Bukowski or a Hate Me kick.   I like to think Bukowski, but it's probably the later.

The Genius of The Crowd

there is enough treachery, hatred violence absurdity in the average
human being to supply any given army on any given day

and the best at murder are those who preach against it
and the best at hate are those who preach love
and the best at war finally are those who preach peace

those who preach god, need god
those who preach peace do not have peace
those who preach peace do not have love

beware the preachers
beware the knowers
beware those who are always reading books
beware those who either detest poverty
or are proud of it
beware those quick to praise
for they need praise in return
beware those who are quick to censor
they are afraid of what they do not know
beware those who seek constant crowds for
they are nothing alone
beware the average man the average woman
beware their love, their love is average
seeks average

but there is genius in their hatred
there is enough genius in their hatred to kill you
to kill anybody
not wanting solitude
not understanding solitude
they will attempt to destroy anything
that differs from their own
not being able to create art
they will not understand art
they will consider their failure as creators
only as a failure of the world
not being able to love fully
they will believe your love incomplete
and then they will hate you
and their hatred will be perfect

like a shining diamond
like a knife
like a mountain
like a tiger
like hemlock

their finest art

Currently listening:
Foiled
By Blue October
Release date: 04 April, 2006