So, I was looking around on myspace today, and fould Audrey Kitching's myspace. For those who don't know, she is one of the original Suicide Girls, you know, back before they took anyone and their mother with a "tramp stamp" or belly button ring.. And nothing against the girl, she is a greqat model, but have you seen all these young girls trying to be her? If not, here are a few links to see the idiolization by these young girls..
http://viewmorepics.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewPicture&friendID=268309&albumId=3570589
http://viewmorepics.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewPicture&friendID=268309&albumId=3563784

I'm not dissing on these young girls, nor Audrey, I'm just saying, "Where the hell are these kids parents?" Yes, I had pink hair at 15, but i didn't try to look like a nude model at that age. Nor would my mother have ever let me. (My mom, not Tu). It's just as bad when I drive home from work at 2 am and there are 15 year old out walking the streets, on school nights!!!

Parents, start paying attention to your children. They might not be happy with rules now, but they'll thank you later in life.

My random rant for the day.. Sorry, I almost hit children with my car, who were riding they're bikes at night, then saw this shit, and couldn't take it..

Have you ever noticed how people who don’t deserve to get anything get everything in the world, while the people who do deserve to get the world can’t even get a piece of dirt? Like I know I’ve gotten somethings that I didn’t deserve, but now that I actually deserve things, I can’t get anything, while people like Paris Hilton are out there getting everything they could ever desire. People always say that you’ll get what you deserve, but how are you supposed to believe that when it all seems like a lie... I guess I’m just in a mood to bitch about something... So, I’m off to go read...

So, Shanna's dad is officially a dick. Oh well. That's neither here nor there. I'm so lost as to what to do anymore. I have school to finish, plus TWO jobs to go to. (Both dancing) I don'tplan on dancing for much longer though. Once I get done with school (hopefully soon), I can start doing nails. But I need to get this school done, it's been a year of me fucking up, time for me to grow up. Yet, how am I supposed to finish school if I can barely stay away long enough to make a coherent sentence? I'll be waking up at 7 am for school, then leaving school at about 1 to go tan, then go home, get Shanna and go to Mons for work, then from Mons, go straight to Silks till 2 am. Then, wake up and start all over again? I'll have Monday's and Tuesdays off, but I plan on staying in school till about 5 or 6, then go tan, then get some sleep. I don't know how I'm going to do it, I'm already starting to want to pull out all of my hair. With every free second that I get (which there aren't many), I have to fight with myself to not cry. Instead, I have to put on a happy face, I have to pretend that everything is okay when inside I'm crying like a little baby. (Yes, Joelle has feelings, she has emotions just like eveyone else) I'm trying to keep a small social life, but I doubt that I'll be awake enough to keep one.

As almost everyone knows, I want to get back with Kevin. Right now, the only thing that I can do to get that is give him time. I have to keep my distance, I have to stay in the distance, yet still be there.

I'm doing everything in my power to keep my head above the water at this point. It's just hard right now, when I'm to tired to keep swimming, I just want to let myself slip and drown. I want to just end it. Only I can't. I have to stay stong, or at least pretend that I am.

If I keep saying that I'm okay, will it eventually come true?

THE CONTINUATION TO OUR LIST FROM 2005

Things we've learned in life through personal experiences….Part II

BASICS:

1. Apparently some bikini waxes come with a complimentary black eye
2. As it turns out, whores can get married
3. If there is a possibility of sex, the amount of time you keep someone waiting is irrelevant.
4. You can always play the spice girls
5. When asking someone to see something "at it's full monstrous capabilities" you should probably make sure your chair is stable so that you don't fall backwards or have a really quick best friend that can catch you while their mouth is still hanging open.
6. If you're going to be on a webcam with someone it's best to make sure everything around is secure and is not going to fall, such as lamps and chairs.
7. If you bring up whitie tighties, we're going to picture you in them.
8. Apparently you're foot can be incorrect.
9. Like a rock!
10. As it turns out, you can get into trouble for doing a Chinese fire drill, but if you don't get into trouble and can ignore the glares it can be quite fun.
11. A trunk party with your best friend can make for quite a good time, though when you come out with no pants on it could mildly confuse people.
12. If you do, or have ever, worked at a bar you tend to be a damn good drunk driver; some would even go as far as to say a professional.
13. It's unsafe to be left unsupervised in a hot tub with boys while you're drunk.
14. When trying to hide making out with someone from your best friend you should probably check beforehand if the guy is wearing make-up, and if it has gotten all over your face.
15. It's a good idea when after you've had sex and taken a nap to keep your mouth shut or you might end up saying things like "but why would you want to join the North American Hunting Club? You don't even live in North America".
16. When spending the night in your best friend's husband's bed and he says "it's ok I haven't done anything on it" it would be best not to follow up with "I have!".
17. Fine does not mean fine, it should only take one time of mistaking that it does mean fine to learn this valuable lesson.
18. When you have a pole in your living room and open blinds your neighbors end up staring into your apartment, and can be mildly creepy.
19. When caught in a fight when your significant other only a very best friend would explain the problem to the guy
20. Apparently there comes a time where even if you offer to let your friend put a strap-on in your ass it still wont make her feel better, she won't even be able to pull herself together to do it.
21. Raketenwissenschaft!
22. It turns out you can get back with your ex based on a drunken speech.
23. Apparently no matter how pretty someone can be there still comes a time when they're not good enough.
24. "Shanna would look better in orange"
25. Joelle is bag lady, but only when she has her cart.
26. As it turns out, all 4 of someone can be beautiful, even if you're beyond drunk.
27. When writing without thinking it's probably not a good sign if you look down and see "get drunk enough" at the end of a sentence that had nothing to do with alcohol and you're completely sober at the time.
28. Only Shanna and I appreciate the complete awesomeness of having a pet skunk.
29. How many best friends would move to New York on a whim to be with their best friend.
30. Having a child and/or ex wife does not make someone less cute.
31. It's only ok to screw up your one year goal if you set one out for your best friend too.
32. It's generally not a good idea to be on shrooms when your boyfriend at the time is trying to say I love you...you might think your arm is gone and freak out on him..and your best friend followed by hanging up on him.

SEX:

1. If you ask someone "so are we gonna fuck or what?" they tend to want to do it right there in the car.
2. As it turns out, when you're fucked up sex on a trampoline can be quite entertaining, though when you're not, it tends to be nauseating.
3. After someone's first orgasm if they attempt to ash a chip instead of a cigarette it's not polite to make fun of them.
4. All guys say that they would not turn down two girls at once, especially us, but when it comes down to it they bitch out.
5. The only appropriate time to push a girl's head down is when she is doing something for you underwater, but this excludes the shower….people have nearly drowned trying.
6. When justifying to your parent why in the world you would offer someone break-up sex in the first place it causes them to hesitate when you say "but he can make his tongue vibrate"
7. Apparently offering the guy you like sex with your best friend in exchange for sharing your feelings, doesn't work.
8. And telling your boyfriend to have sex with your best friend while you stay home and work on your homework could cause them to get offended.
9. Yes, we can do the ass clap during sex. And yes, I can make my body vibrate. Going by some standards that would make us sex gods.



ANOTHER FACT:

We really are awesome…or just skilled at getting everything we want.

AND ONCE AGAIN IN THE INFAMOUS WORDS OF JOELLE: "FUCK YOU!!!!!"

OUR ORIGINAL LIST FROM MAY 18, 2005

Things I've learned in life through personal experiences and experiences of friends:

Basics:
1. Getting a bean stuck in your throat does NOT feel good.. and trying to get it out w/ ur finger causes you to gag and cough
2. Apparently you CAN walk up to someone and kiss them
3. Maintenence people suck
4. Shanna and Me are fucking awesome and if you have the priviledge of us actually liking you.. consider urself lucky
5. Shanna sucks at cleaning.. we found this one out today
6. Not eating for over 24 hours is generally not a good thing.. tho usually what causes this WAS a good thing
7. Blue gatorade and vodka makes for a hell of a drink
8. NO MEANS NO! Except for some people it means "no dont stop" but for us..it means NO
9. Never accept a drink if you're not gonna drink it or if you're only using it as an excuse to go back to someones room/house
10. Take a hint.. realize when you've worn out your welcome
11. The best pickup lines in the world are the following.. a) nice pants.. wanna fuck? b) fuck me if im wrong but dont i know you (to a person you dont know) but it can be switched to fuck me if im wrong but is your name Lenton c) that shirt is very becoming on you.. of course if i was on you i'd be coming too or d) if you were a booger i'd pick you first
12. The best things in life arent free
13. Picking ur nose then licking ur finger is only considered appropriate if you've just done a line
14. Chicken wings cannot be shared
15. If we forget your name.. it doesnt mean it wasnt good
16. The "girl problems" excuse gets you out of everything.. as does anal leakage
17. When youre high, silk soymilk is like god in a cup
18. When you're trying to get someone in trouble and pointing out the things they did wrong you would think "he tried to make me comfortable and i didnt wanna be comfortable" wouldn't go over well
19. If all the people you've been with doesnt fit on on hand.. it doesnt mean ur a whore
20. Apparently Shanna can't spit like a guy
21. It ok to eat like a pig with ur best friend.. as long as no one else sees it
22. Apparently it makes guys feel awkward when they go to a someones house and the girls there don't feel like putting shirts on
23. Awesome movies include 1. Crybaby..best fucking movie in the world..there are other reasons for this but they will not be explained under any circumstances 2. Blow 3. Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas and 4. Spiceworld..haha Joelle There are others but I dont feel like including them right now
24. Best friends moving away sux but it especially sux to be the best friend thats moving away
25. Lying about things that people know arent true you'd think would be pointless but some people are too fucking retarded to realize that
26. Shanna and I are like Rick James, on the Chapelle's Show, our awsomeness just radiates off of us if you look really close you can see the aura around us
27. My most commonly used nickname is whorebag, but for some people who REALLY know me it's Wanda
SEX:
1. Its usually NOT a good idea to tell someone "its ok i'm fertile" right before you're about to have sex w/o a condom
2. Its also not a good idea to spank someone hard and call them randy in the middle of foreplay... especially if their name is no where near close to randy... though it could be mildy amusing if they think you said ready
3. Don't use the line "Ive never had a girl with a tongue ring do that" it doesnt work and its not going to, though it is funny for those of us that have tongue rings
4. After playing a joke during sex do not follow it with an inside joke that the person ur saying it to has no idea what it means
5. There IS a difference between fertile and sterile and you should learn the definition before saying it
6. You should probably make sure the person is on birth control or not before assuming then realizing in the middle of sex that they're not
7. Do not start a threesome you cant finish.. those pussies
8. Apparently suggesting adding a family member to the threesome may freak the guy out and theres a large chance he will turn it down.. those fuckers
9. Girls DON'T like having their head pushed down the entire time.. I have yet to have met a girl that does
10. Usually jokes during sex.. especially ones that start with "Oh my god i'm so sorry" arent gonna go over well
11. Neither is the "oops" trick
12. You can go around a bikini
13. It's best not to start something you cant finish
14. Dont start a threesome if it's right after ur first time doing beans and they've worn off
15. Sharing guys youve scrumped with ur best friend kicks ass!!!
16. You can get a gallon of hot cinnamon anal lube WITH a push pump on ebay for like $7.99 or something like that...

ANOTHER FACT THATS ALSO AN INSIDE JOKE...:

Cocaine's a hell of a drug!!!

AND IN THE INFAMOUS WORDS OF JOELLE: "FUCK YOU!!!!!!"

So, this weekend was AMAZING. Shanna and I drove our asses to GA to go see DJ. It was so much fun. Well, I don't know what to write. I'm so happy that I got to see DJ and meet some of his friends.. Well, I'm off to lay down.

So, I'm starting to realize who my true friends are. There are some who are REAL friends, and then there are one's who are only friends when I am of value to them. Turns out the one of the best is someone who I haven't even met yet! To the people who are only friends to me when I can do something for you, FUCK YOU! You know who you are. The one's who I've been OVERLY generous to, who at this point in time only give me dirty looks anytime I'm around, FUCK YOU! If your a real friend, you'll know it, if I'm PISSED at you for being a douche, your sure as hell gonna know it! Well, things are better now, thanks to that ONE person who is helping me with one thing, and the others who are there for me when I need them, THANK YOU SO MUCH!

My head is spinning,
I can't think straight,
No arguments are winning,
All my crying can wait.
I try not to cry,
I try to be strong,
I'm sure I'll get by,
I don't think I'm too wrong.
I try not to protest,
I try not to mind,
I must confess,
I've been unkind.
I fell so much pain,
Every single day,
I feel distain,
In every single way.
I feel tainted,
With who it seems I am,
My face is painted,
Right now, I just don't give a damn.

Everything is going perfect right now. Except for the whole Kevin leaving things. That was quite upsetting, but I have AMAZING friends who will be there for me no matter what happens in my life. I realize that it's not my loss with Kevin having left, it's his. Obviously I'm a good enough person to have great friends who'll be there for me no matter what. I might not be the nicest person at times and I might not be the smartest person at times, but I obviously pick good times to be nice to people and I pick good times to be smart, because I wouldn't have the friends that I have now if I was a horrible person. I just wanted to let everyone know that life is great, my friends are great, and I am great. Nothing can put me in a bad mood right now. I want to put a special thanks to Shanna and Ben for being there for me, Shanna thanks for ALWAYS being there no matter what, and Ben, thanks for letting me drive my ass to Orlando to stay with you on Tuesday, you made me realize a few things and I appreciate it, ALOT. Well, I'm off to go see Natalie, and go swimming.

Life is good.

1. Have we kissed?:
2. If not, do you want to?:
3. What would you like our relationship to be?:
4. Have we dated?:
5. If so, did you like it?:
6. If not, do you want to date?:
7. Are we close friends?:
8. Would you be here if I needed you?:
9. Are you attracted to me?:
10. Mentally, sexually, or both?:
11. Do you love me?:

Appearance Do you like my-
12. Face?:
13. Eyes?:
14. Lips?:
15. Body?:
16. Arms?:
17. Legs?:
18. Clothes?:
19. Ass?:
20. Hands?:
21. Hair?:

Do think I'm-
22. Cute?:
23. Beautiful?:
24. Sexy?:
25. Gorgious?:

Personality Do you think I'm-
26. Crazy?:
27. Nice?:
28. Fun to be around?:
29. Funny?:
30. Annoying?:

Would you..
31. Share chocolate with me?:
32. Spend a weekend with me alone?:
33. Kiss me if you had the chance right now?:
34. Hook up with me?:
35. Have sex with me?:
36. Ask me on a date?:
37. Care if I died?:
38. Miss me if I left?:
39. Hang out with me?:

What would you do if..
40. I kissed you?:
41. You found out I was missing?:
42. You found out I was in the hospital?:
43. You found out I was dead?:
44. I cried?:
45. I asked you for help?:
46. I told you I loved you?:
47. I told you I hated you?:
48. Someone told you I wanted you to kiss me?:
49. Someone told you I had a crush on you?:

In the last week have you..
50. Wanted to kiss me?:
51. Wanted to see me?:
52. Wanted to have sex with me?:
53. Wanted to tell me you loved me?:
54. Wanted to spend alone time with me? *wink*:
55. Wanted to get to know me better?:
56. Thought about me?:
57. Missed me?:
58. Wanted me?:
59. Seen me?:
60. Kissed me?:

Have I..
61. Kissed you?
62. Hugged you?
63. Told you I loved you?:
64. Made you happy?:
65. Made you sad?:
66. Made you angry?:
67. Made you feel better when you were upset?:

Are you..
68. Happy you know me?:
69. Going to post this is so I can answer it?: