This is a work in progress with Neale. Feel free to add you own suggestions

1. Rambo: First Blood - "A Young Girl's Coming of Age Story"

2. Quest for Fire is just two hours of some guy asking passersbys for a light

3. Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid - "A New York Lesbian's Blossoming friendship with a Young Drag Queen"

4. Die Hard – "An Adult Film"

5. Reservoir Dogs – Dick flick about coal miners learning how to love again

6. Blade Runner – A crippled Olympic skate sharpener dreams of a better life

7. Capote – an avant-garde film that's two hours of a man drinking himself to death

Type in the answers to these questions into google image search and see what whack stuff you get. Choose one of the first 4 results.

First impulse upon rising

Food often craved

Present state of mind

Quality you are ashamed of

First name of current lover with last name of celebrity you would bang

You in ten years

One word describing the smell of your house right now

Nickname for the place of your birth

A word that litters your lexicon, one that you say far too often

Describe in one word the feeling you get when you are under the pressure of a deadline

Adverb describing how you eat

One word you associate with your darkest or best kept secret

One word describing the last vivid image you recall from a dream

Take the first name of a close friend and combine it with the maiden name of your paternal grandmother

Adjective describing something disgusting about yourself

One word for something disgusting about most people

Guy: Man I would kill for a mint in the box Spock

door handle jiggles, soft banging is heard

G: uh, hello

Satan: uh, hey man can you open the door?

G: Who is it?

S: Satan.

G: oh ok

Door opens

S: Im the prince of darkness..you really dont need to lock your door at this hour.in this neighborhood. I wasnt really prepared for that. Man, youd be surprised how rarely this happens

G: sorry, I just had a shower. (Beat) do you wanna come in?

S: yeah, thats probably a good idea (mumbled)

stand in silence for a beat

S: so you said youd kill a guy

G: I dont believe I was that specific

S: how do you mean?

G: well.Ill kill something

S: keep going

G: I dont think I can kill anything bigger than say 153 pounds

S: funny you should say that, cause there arent many guys in that weight class that have pissed me off.

S: well. So what were you thinking?

G: how do you feel about fish

S: whales are good

G: no can do

S: do you think a 147 fishd be ok?

G: are these specific fish?

S: yes, just say thatthere are some specific fish that havehow can I put it.incurred the wrath of Satan.

G: why 147? What happened to the extra six pounds?

S: you want me to lie? Theres only a 147 fish that I want dead.

G: well you can throw in other animals if you like. Is there anything that weighs six pounds, to be fair?

S: no.

G: well are these fish local

S: you know I wish it were that tidy

G: how far we talking

S: theres about 50 downtown.but the rest are scattered all over the globe

G: are you willing to cover my travel expenses?

Satan shakes head

S: this isnt how it works, ok? I thought I could get some errands done here, but I think youre just wasting my time

G: no no wait, how do you feel about medium sized mammals

S: like what

G: sloths, cows, id be willing to pull plugs for ya in the hospital

S: yeah, thanks but I think I can keep a handle on that

G: look, Im just putting ideas on the table

S: you know what I got a 3:20 in Hong Kong

G: well can I get your card?

S: you know what, ill call you

G: well if you like I can just meet you somewhere tomorrow

S: ill be out of town for quite some time, ill have someone come by in the next little while

G: do you want my number?

S: youre in the book

G: oh ok

Guy opens door, Satan walks out

Satan turns around, guy lets door close

S: I forgot my cell phone

G: right, its over there on the chair

S: ok, well see ya

G: sure thing

Satan goes the door, it doesnt open

S: do I have to jiggle it

G: just push up

S: god, I do not have time for thisyeah yeah thanks