I've been asked about this song a few times, and basically it was written by three different people both musically and lyrically: Shaughan, Shad, and Tara.

It's a story of one person (the rejector) that is in love with another (the person being rejected), but not having it returned in the way they would like, and the multiple perspectives surrounding it.

The first and second verses are from the perspective of the rejector, who does not want to give up the friendship. The lyrics in the verses are Shaughan's, and if I remember correctly, the music was Shad's.

The choruses are from the perspective of the person being rejected's mother, who is offering much needed words of encouragement after this rejection. The words here are mostly Shad's, and the music was Tara's if I am correct.

The long breathless breakdown: lyrics by Tara, music by Shaughan. It's about the one being rejected, again.

The ending after this is kind of the rejector's response to the words of the mother. The lyrics are by Shaughan.

So Big Ballerina was kind of a coming together of a lot of different parts and lyrics, and was put together by Shaughan into a cohesive whole. This is the most asked about song, by far, so I thought I would elaborate about its story.




verse 1
How can I explain my want for others?
How can I cause you pain,
When there's so much pleasure?
I like you as a friend,
But not as a lover.
Put another scratch in the cracked wooden window frame.

chorus
Big ballerina, won't you dance for me tonight?
I'll give you the stage with the blaze in your eyes.
Don't ever be ashamed.
Your essence is strong; they can't take it away.
Big ballerina, won't you step into the light?
I'd see you and take in the beautiful sight.
If you'd dance for me tonight.

verse 2
How can I take away
The anguish they've caused you?
Guess it's easy to say;
I see what you go through...
Our differences lie in the agony we both knew;
We had to run defenseless through tatters of reason.

chorus
Big ballerina, won't you dance for me tonight?
I'll give you the stage with the blaze in your eyes.
Don't ever be ashamed.
Your essence is strong; they can't take it away.
Big ballerina, won't you step into the light?
I'd see you and take in the beautiful sight.
If you'd dance for me tonight.

breakdown
She will whimper and wander and wait
For the kiss of some handsome prince to take
The pain and all the things that were said
And give her a piece of his heart instead.
Carefully, but hastily, saw out the core,
Cackling serve it on a plate for four.
The abject reign will surely entertain
Constant, laborious, chronic mascara veins.
The empty vessel, it tumbles now,
Heeding down, seething down,
Seeping down, bleeding down.
The shell, it glows enough to show;
The void in her chest runs black
Until this invented prince rides back
And saves her from wretchedness...
Of cold side pillows and wheezing breaths.
Sleep now an endless slumber;
Just whimper and wander and wait.
Just wait.

ending/verses 3&4
(You wait. You wait. You wait. You wait.)
You wait and you stand alone.
(You stand alone.)
You never escape
(You never escape.)
This doubt you have known,
(You see...you see...you see...you see...)
You see, you see, there's no cheering crowd,
(There's no cheering crowd...)
But at least there's always me.
(At...least...there's...always...me.)
Someday we hope to change
What's real into dreams.
How can I take away the
Anguish that they've caused you?
Guess it's easy to say; I see what you go through...
( I guess I just know you)
Our differences lie in the agony we both knew...
We had to run defenseless through tatters of reason.

well everyone, we are making huge progress on our 5-song EP that is coming out soon, which will be titled "The Dreamless Sleep of the Resigned." It will have Big Ballerina, i, so and so, East Main Street, and Lead Me Now on it.

Check out our show saturday at DUke's! It's a great place to get drunk. Just ask Chris.

Also, I updated the website, added new song lyrics, and don't forget to vote for your fav song! Go Now!

thanks for reading

sk

We <3 BP Valentine Photography. Here are some shots from our show at Pegasus Lounge on 4/22. Thanks to Wolfy Lonesome and the Devil's Band, Sin Sick World, and Skif Dank for rockin' with us. DEFINITELY check out these bands if you haven't already.





Chris's expression rules this pic.















Xaq never stops the rock. Even post-show.


Thanks for reading. Go to our show in Casselberry tomorrow 4/29! Check the show section for details!!!

Thanks to Ash from the RAW AMP radio show on USF's own WBUL! We had our interview Monday, and spun our radio debut of our song "So and So" from our upcoming album. Psyched is the word. Here's all of our hotness captured in photo form.



Also, thanks to JAKE! from WBUL for letting Tara raid his Heinrick the Gnome Show on Tuesday to promote Finding Mulder some more. Go listen to him here.
Pirate Radio

Don't forget to tune into these guys on this site or 1620am for the Tampa area.

AND COME TO OUR SHOW AT PEGASUS LOUNGE ON SATURDAY THE 22nd!!
DO IT!

In less than 24 hours of posting that we needed help and donations due to our stolen cashbox, Finding Mulder received enough to break even from our loss.  That is absolutely AMAZING and you all have been so kind it's insane. 

A special, special thanks to: Professor Twain of USF, BP Valentine, and especially April !!!! What amazing, amazing people. We shall never forget! And the album will have special thanks in it to you all - you can count on that.

Also, thank you SO much to EVERYONE who reposted our bulletins and showed support.  We <3 you.  And thanks to all the employees of Duke's Billiards and BS Productions for helping us in any way they could!  That's always been our favorite place to play, and it still is!  Great people and best damn sound in Orlando!

One album coming right up!

As if things couldn't get any worse...

All of our band's money was stolen!

A few hundred bucks that we were saving up to press our album. Someone ripped off our cashbox last night...so we're pretty crushed because we've worked our asses off to make Finding Mulder financially self-sufficient. We're asking for your help. PLEASE check out our merch section...you can purchase any of this off of our web site and we'll mail it to you.

We're also asking anyone to spare ANYTHING they can donate. Even if it's 50 cents. Anyone who is kind enough to help us recover from this horrible loss will get special credit on our web site.

CLICK HERE TO MAKE A DONATION ON OUR WEB SITE

And here's some merch! We also have RED shirts not pictured here!

NOW YOU CAN GET FM MERCHANDISE ONLINE!

CLICK HERE!

POSTERS!


SHIRTS!



And Much More!

Thanks to everyone who came out to our gig at Full Sail Live on March 9th. We had a great audience and an amazing group of guys who put the whole thing together. We can't wait for the final live audio and DVD. Stay tuned!

Our good friend Hassan Patterson from Head Hunter Studio in Cocoa came out to rock and shot some killer photos while he was at it. Here are a bunch of 'em...so if you missed the show, now you can feel like you were there. Aw...

(photobucket resizes pics randomly...bummer)















Neat backstage!






We're not sure...but we think this means that Chris is a rockstar.








Nice!
Thanks for reading!

We've been busy little Mulders over here.  We played a great show at Duke's Billiards last Saturday with Massive Head Wound, Etched in Stone, and Rinker. 

AKA, three bands you definitely need to check out.

The show was recorded and put on the air on http://resistancemedia.net/

Sign up for their newsletter, too.  Here's what they had to say about us in their last one....

"FindingMulder: Having seen MHW and RINKER before, and after watching Etched In Stone, we had no idea what to expect...and was I pleasently surprised.  I actually bought merch for the first time in...well...it's been a long damn time.  Wait...I think I bought some ATM stuff a coupla years ago. Anyway, awesome group, you should really catch them live."

So...aaaaaaaaaaw.  We're happy.  Thanks, guys!

Also, if you're in Orlando next Thursday...go to our show at FULL SAIL!!!  This is a live taping and we need peeps.  Free show.  Woot.

We're also going to be rocking Tir Na Nog in Daytona on Friday the 10th.

That's enough rambling.

One more thing.  Phase 1 of our debut album is underway.  Actually it's more like phase 19.  At any rate...be on the lookout for our full-length.

Do it.

 

Come to our show tomorrow, Feb. 25th, at Duke's Billiards in Orlando! Now you can get our Merch online! Hooray for paypal! Check out Our Myspace OR Our Official Site Buy some stuff. Also, send a self-addressed envelope to Finding Mulder 2211 Marcia Drive Orlando, FL 32807 And we'll send you some free goodies (stickers, love notes, etc). ALSO! We're taking off most of this upcoming month to work on our debut full length album. Hope you're excited...we sure are. Go here and vote for your favorite FM song! We also have new promo pics up, if you wanna check those out. Maybe? We're kinda cute... Thanks for reading! -FM

Happy Holidays, everyone!! We've got lots of cool stuff going on. Check it out...

Web Site Stuff

1. Download some of our acoustic tunes on the web site (even one you can't get on myspace!) 2. Vote for your favorite song on the web site.

Media Frenzy!

Stay tuned for a Finding Mulder DVD from Vagrant Productions. Whoa! Exciting. Those guys rock it so hard!

Shows (check show section for more details)

1. 12/30/05 Pegasus Lounge in Tampa! We're stoked to see lots of great friends from that side of the state. 2. 1/06/06 The Social in Orlando! We better see all you locals out there! We're uber excited about this one. 3. 1/13/06 Holly and Dolly's in Casselberry! By BS Productions...those are our bros. This is a FREEEEEEEE show 21+ ...no excuses. 4. 1/27/06 The Mad Hatter in Lakeland! This is a blast from the past for a few of us....it's the NEW hatter and we're rockin' with some old buds. Check it. 5. 2/10/06 Bourbon Street in New Port Richey! Momocakes is da man and we're rockin' with Chumley's Toy and more! This is gonna be sweet. In other news... ...Shaughan's Marshal head is fine, despite falling off of a stage ...Tara's foot is fine after kicking some weird kid in the head during a set. ...Chris's feet are fine, even after starting a new job where he stands a lot. ...and we'll hope that Xaq remains fine after snowboarding in Colorado over the holidays. Yikes. On a final note, thanks for being our friend, giving enough of a damn to read our blog, and have a safe holiday.