History of Guana Batz by Pip Hancox

(originally written for the Speedfreaks Forum late 2005)

8^th Dec 2005 – part one

Well, thanks a lot Mick! it's 3am over here and I can't sleep as I woke up thinking about a little Batz 101 I'd mentioned to Mick I might do. He hasn't let me forget that, so here goes.
Being born in 65 to a mother with a pretty good collection of Buddy Holly, Chuck Berry and Eddie Cochran, I guess I was destined to grow up listening to great music. i grew particularly attached to Mr Cochran and my earliest song writing memories are taking his songs and changing the words, (sound familiar Setzer?!!). Lyrics more befitting an 11 year old that needed to get the money together to buy a drape and creepers at Jack Brendans in ....Kingston....!

By the time I was 13/14 I'd progressed to more hardcore rock and roll like the imperial collections and i was officially addicted. I started to frequent a club on Saturday nights named the St Hellier arms in Carlshalton,a far drive from my Weybridge homestead at that age, but somehow managed to get my mums permission and a local rockabilly called Tim to take me there. there I was exposed to the thrill of live music, good dj's and wild dancing, at which I never became very proficient, resembled my current stage gay boy style of movements, I suppose I thought I looked good though. Flying Saucers, Black Cat and of course Crazy Cavan were some of the bands that stood out. oh, and i also remember a guy playing in a band wearing a white suit, boss hog style, that i learned later was Mr Fenech. I don't remember the name of the band but i think it was pre raw deal days.

At around 14 my mum found me an ad in melody maker, seeking a singer for a rockabilly band. although they were based out of Battersea, South London, my mum was prepared to let me travel British Rail and undergrounds to help me find my fame and fortune (or to stop me whining that I had nobody to jam with in my severely  untrendy style of music!) I was soon taken under the wing of these older, somewhat scary rockin' cats, among them being Sam on guitar who later formed red hot and blue. I remember the drummer being a particularly scary looking chap named roger, who became a good friend and bodyguard and peaked my interest in tattoos, much to mums dismay!

We named ourselves the Slapbacks, practised weekly at the Jollybags warehouse, where Sam used to work, and did a grand total of one gig at the castle in tooting before we disbanded due to bass player problems. Thanks Tony...I could have been a star! It was in the Slapbacks that I wrote my first real song named "you're so fine"(Batz version currently available on ebay!!!!!)
Well, the summer of 1980 rolled around and it was time for me to leave school, devoid of any o-levels or a-levels (school credentials for those too young...) and move out of home and into a flat that my recently divorced father owned above his home improvements store in Bedfont, just outside of Feltham. With no job,  and on the dole, it wasn't long before I latched onto the "bad" crowd. A mix of skinheads, punks and the now rather trendy, rockabilly movement. It was at this time I met, probably the most influential person in my life, Dave Turner, who I later dubbed "Diddle" due to his challenged height. We became very close friends and he was responsible for taking me to my first meteors gig at the Hope and Anchor in Islington and adding some spice to my somewhat bland taste in pure rockabilly. Fuck, that gig blew me away! There were maybe 75 people in attendance, which looked pretty much sold out in that place, amongst which were such characters as rattlesnakin' russell, big mandy, krazy kev and jonna. I was beaten to fuck on the dance floor and loved every minute! Backstage after the gig, (no cattle in them days to keep little turds away!) I was invited to suck on some old chicken bones around the neck of the fake blood covered front man that later became known to me as p.paul fenech. Don't know what potion he had on those rancid old bones or maybe it was just the old saliva remnants of the surrounding psychobilly pioneers, but I was done. No turning back. Psychobilly hit me hard and from that day on, I wanted to make my mark in

this one band scene. All I needed now were musicians.....

Well, that's it for now. It's very late (early?) and I have a piss poor memory, but this is what I do recall about the Batz formative years and I hope it's not too boring. To be continued........

14 Dec 2005 – Part two

OK, where was I? Ahh yes, a band, I needed a band. Well, Diddle was in agreement, we needed our own band. It didn't take many gigs to become friends with a fair share of the Meteors following. We weren't talking big numbers in those days but enough for us to realise if we started a band most of them would show up at least once, even if it was to give us a bunch of crap. So, with that lot and all our friends from Bedfont/Feltham area, we had our audience, we just needed musicians.
I guess I haven't mentioned that neither Diddle nor I were actually musicians so we had quite a bit of work ahead of us! Oh sure, I had done the Slapbacks thing for a short while, which I'm sure helped me feel justified to put my name forward as being the singer. Reality was though, I had little patience to become any more competent on guitar than to strum the same 3 chords to most Eddie Cochran songs, and singing as far as I was concerned, required no tuition or practice. Perfect!  Frontman I was then!! But what about poor Diddle?

Well,he always fancied himself as a drummer if the opportunity ever arose (think it was that height thing....we're all the same sitting down!).Not that he owned any drums or had even attempted to play any, but he loved women, smoked and drank a lot and had pretty big arms, so drummer it was then!

So onto guitar. After trying out a couple of mates and realising my 3 chords were something they aspired to, we were left with one choice.....Sam from the Slapbacks. Now if this seems like a choice I had ,until then avoided, there could be some truth to that. You see,Sam was one of those died in the wool rockabilly's from Bradford who looked really cool and was amazing on guitar but, err...hmmm....absolutely detested the Meteors! They had fucked with his beloved music and they should be shot. So the thought of him coming to rehearse whilst all along, I'm trying to steer him into playing psychobilly without him noticing, was a little daunting. But we had no other options. He was on his way to Bedfont from sunny old Battersea, guitar in hand.

If I recall diddle had green hair at the time and I knew Sam would take one look at our drummer ,sitting with his drum sticks, buckets and cardboard boxes he set up as drums and smell a rat! So I had him dye his hair black to look a little more" authentic".

By this time I was working on Saturdays at my old man's home improvements shop so that he could go down to the betting shop without disrupting business. It was usually pretty quiet at work (i think most of Bedfont were at the betting shops on Saturdays!) so I decided this would be a perfect day to get Sam over and have a little jam.

Saturday rolled around so I shuffled dad off to his favourite shop and began setting up a little area in the back for us to try and bamboozle Sam into wanting to be a part of all this. He showed up, as promised, and got along well with Diddle. We told him,"2 more dole cheques and we would have a drum kit" to ease his mind on that front. Well, we rocked out all day! We mainly just did covers that Sam and i had done before but the effect of boxes and buckets for drums really gave it that "psycho"edge! Sam actually seemed to enjoy himself so we arranged "same time, same place" next week and we were well on our way to being the worlds second psychobilly band. Or so I thought!

It did seem a little strange that my fathers store didn't have one customer that whole historic day but, oh well, we just got lucky. After all, this was destiny.
Not so fast numbnuts. customers HAD been rolling in but hearing the terrible racket coming from the back of the shop, decided to shop elsewhere. Except for one. She returned Monday morning to inform my irritable father of my shenannigans and all hell broke loose!

I went from a cool cat with my own apartment at 15 to, out on the streets, in one heated exchange. Fuck it! Where were we going to rehearse now? And, oh yeah, where was I going to sleep? The thought of moving back to my mums which, even though at only 15 miles away felt like the other end of ....England...., was inconceivable. What would my newfound group of delinquents do without me? So I went from a few nights in the luxury of Diddle's couch, to sleeping in apartment corridors, to boiler rooms and my last stop, a cardboard box inside a telephone box on Bedfont High Street. I was just getting past the freezing to death stage (that damn light bulb hardly let off any heat!) and starting to nod off when a metallic tapping put a stop to that. It was a policeman. I had apparently been reported as a possible dead body and it was time to move on. Upon realising that I was, by now,16 (there must have been an age limit for sleeping in phone boxes)the officer was not about to let me wander off into the night. So 3am,my mum gets the call and comes out to get me and tuck me up in my old bedroom back in Weybridge, much to her relief. Pippy had come home! How humiliating. I was destined for the prince of psychobilly  throne, which being homeless fit in just fine thank you. But here i was back in suburbia, with nothing to show for my cause but a zorch head Meteors tattoo on my right shoulder with the script "the krazy eighties" below. Krazy indeed. Living at home was not krazy! Weybridge was not krazy! Getting a job was not krazy. I wanted to return to the mecca of krazy. Hell,i was miles from Feltham Football Club! No bands ever played in Weybridge.

Enter Mr Stuart Osborne and Tom Evans to the rescue.......to be continued.

Just wanted to apologise for this being a bit more long-winded than i first planned but you know what I'm like once i start rambling!
Oh, and if it seems more like "the history of Pip" so far, I can only tell my story as I don't know what Stuart and Jonny etc were up to during these early days, but they're more than welcome to chime in with their early stories, right?
I swear, the next instalment will get to the meat of the Guana Batz actually forming.
Thanks for your patience.

15 Dec 2005 – part three

Wow, I'm going to have to start making stuff up soon to make this interesting, but so far everything is true.


So, gone were the days of wreckless living and youthful exuberance. No more snakebite and black at Feltham Football Club (FFC).No more treating ourselves to fish and chips on Tuesdays when me and Diddle got our dole cheques. And definitely  no more cranking up my record player with the speakers pointing out of my apartment windows, playing the "In Heaven" album for the whole of Bedfont high street to listen to as they shuffled their way to the betting shops and pubs!

I was back in the mellow, somewhat affluent surroundings of my upbringing, although the affluence of our particular household had been somewhat drained over the years by my fathers affection for the afore-mentioned betting shops. It was this addiction that, I believe, led to the demise of my parents marriage sometime around 1979-80. I don't recall the divorce affecting me much, especially with the bonus of me scoring my own apartment as soon as I left school at 15. Both parents made it as amicable as possible for me and my brother and kept us from the details.

Plus, I had Andrea Jennings! Life was good. I was in love!!!! We had met whilst I lived in Bedfont, at various gigs at the FFC. The place was buzzing in those days. Despite the unlikely location of the club, a small bar with a medium sized dancefloor in the backroom ,it managed to garner its fair share of top acts such as The Deltas, Shakin'Pyramids, Meteors and later on King Kurt, which is where I met my first love. Steve and Colin ran the rockabilly club on Friday nights and were responsible for booking these top acts. Feltham was a great place to be at this time.

Andrea lived in Hounslow, just down the road from Bedfont and was a big King Kurt fan. She was also trouble! Despite this fact, I kept the relationship going even though I now lived a whopping 15 miles away and it wasn't long before she moved in with me in my home in Byfleet that I now shared with my brother, Russ. She got a job at a nearby hotel as a chambermaid and I had started helping my Mum and her new husband, John, whom I immediately became very close to, with their window replacement business.

I never really felt very well suited to the inconvenience of work and had no plans, at the time, to pursue a career of any kind. Then ,one day ,in the spring of "
'82 a letter arrived to a Mr Pip Hancox. It was postcoded  Hounslow. Oh shit! What part of my recent past had come back to haunt me?

I tore into it with trepidation, to find a cassette tape accompanied by a letter. It read:

Dear Mr Hancox,
Please find enclosed a tape for your listening pleasure, put together by Stuart Osborne, whom you may remember from FFC. He is planning on forming a band and recalls you and Diddle had similar plans some time ago. We have spoken with Diddle and he is up for it so have a listen and let us know what you think.
yours sincerely,
Tom Evans.

Stuart was a familiar part of the local crowd at FFC, but not somebody I had spent any time with. You see, myself and Diddle had our own, somewhat elitist group consisting of Jock, Nutter and Biffo amongst others, that considered ourselves to be true fans thanks to our tattoos, willingness to travel out of town for gigs, and general distain for the likes of Stuart and his own watered down version of our scene! Sure, Stuart was pleasant enough and seemed to know his stuff but he was more of a clean cut enthusiast who wore pleasant sweaters and baseball jackets. He even went to college! Freak!!! But, apparently, he played guitar.

Tom Evans, was a well meaning, very knowledgeable part of the scene who helped out with putting the gigs together at the FFC,a nd was respected by his peers .A very quiet, soft spoken man who still lived at home despite his advanced years. This, of course meant he was maybe late 20's which was pretty damn old to us young whippersnappers. So the fact that this request had Toms involvement, meant instant credibility. But Stuart?

So in went the tape.

This boy could play guitar. And bass. And knew how to operate a drum machine, all of which he demonstrated on this tape of ,maybe,6 songs. His vocals were adequate, but his ability to write songs and play the guitar were undeniable. So I promptly removed the tape and went back the business of riding my BMX (a sport I loved) and being in love! After all, how was I going to put in the time required to put a band together and rehearse, living all those miles away with no car or intention of obtaining a drivers licence. I had my BMX and new Vans slip-ons. Life was just fine.

Approximately 2 months went by. I continued my half hearted attempts at putting in a few days work a week, just enough to fund going to King Kurt shows and the occasional Meteors gig with Andrea. The Meteors had, by this time, changed a few members and were no longer the band I once adored. Hell,Mick White, an old friend from Feltham was even playing bass now. The mayhem at King Kurt gigs was much more appealing.

Obviously irritated by my, rude lack of response, Tom decided to call me and get me to at least come over to Stuarts for a chat. Then he offered the deal breaker! He was willing to come over in his work van and pick me up and bring me back home. He also mentioned this would continue if I were to accept the offer of frontman in Stuart's band. Now this was more like it! A chauffeur! This appealed to my somewhat lazy attitude, and I agreed to a meeting, if only to get to hang out in my beloved Feltham area once again.

I'll be back........

23 Dec 2005 - Part four

OK,OK, I'm getting my stomach tattooed tomorrow so probably won't feel like doing much and then we'll be into Christmas. So after much prodding (thanks Jo),I shall continue.......

So the 1/2 hr trip to Stuarts in Toms van was filled with polite conversation and catching up on the activities of the Feltham gang. Tom and Stu had continued their 3 times a week routine to the FFC so were in constant contact with all my mates, so the trip seemed like 5 minutes.

We reached Stu's house, a 4 bedroom town house in the middle class part of Hounslow (the white part!).After a brief meeting with his parents,2 brothers and 1 sister at the bottom of the stairs, I was swiftly ushered up to the palace. Stu's bedroom was a loft conversion, perfect in the sense that loud noise would distract the rest of the household less than in a regular bedroom. Good idea Stu!
All appeared as normal for a young mans bedroom, except for one glaring standout. Sitting on a table in the middle of the room, glistening like the crown jewels themselves, a Port-a-studio!

Holy crap, maybe this whole college idea wasn't such a bad one. How the hell did he afford one of those? During their introduction in the early eighties to such budding spotty faced musicians, this fine piece of modern technology sold for similar currency as a small, reliable, albeit a little rusty automobile. Hell, you could probably buy a flat in Bedfont for the price of 2 of these contraptions! I was instantly hit with a sudden understanding of how Stu's demo tape sounded as good as it did, shortly followed by a slight hit of guilt for not remembering what the hell I did with it. That tape had some investment involved and should have been treated with beffiting respect.

Well, the tea and biscuits flowed that night, kindly ushered by one of Stu's brothers who used any excuse to see what we were up to in his bedroom he shared with big bruv. Refreshments were greeted with thanks shortly followed by an abrupt "OUT" by Stuart, increasingly irritated by his brothers inquisitiveness.
As it turned out, Tom, perhaps with a little help from Stu, had taken on a healthy payment plan to pay for the 4 track recorder .I was excited that they were serious enough about all this to go to such expense and thrilled at the fact I was not involved in the purchasing process.

I believe that first night we got straight down to the business of laying down my vocals to replace Stu's. His bass lines had already been recorded over with double bass played by Mick Wigfall who was proudly in attendance that night. Diddle had also been delivered to this historic meeting of the minds and in no time at all it was agreed the band was now up and running.

All the while, Tom Evans sat quietly at the far end of the room, smoking away with a somewhat knowing grin across his face. He was witnessing the birth of his first child. He was a proud father.

These formative rehearsals continued in Stu's room for some time until Diddles dream of owning a drum kit became a reality, probably with Toms help, and we decided it was time to move to a facility where noise would not be an issue. Weekly rehearsals continued, now at a rehearsal studio in ....Acton..... Stuarts songs were now flowing thick and fast and the somewhat humorous renditions of meteors songs were now being replaced by originals such as Jungle Rumble and Rockin in my Coffin. The importance of including some covers was agreed upon and such classics as Train kept a Rollin' and Dynamite were bashed out with pure energy and excitement. We really started to feel as though we had something to be proud of and were anxious to show the world. Our impatience was counteracted, rightfully so, by Tom who realised that our first gig should be as tight and professional as possible if we were to be taken seriously. The rehearsals continued.

By this time Stu had decided he much preferred playing alongside an electric bass rather than the unforgiving timing issues created by a stand up. I wasn't so convinced but, hey,I didn't even plug my guitar in so timing was not an issue for me. Mick Wigfall was promptly replaced by Bob on electric bass. Not quite sure where Bob came from but it wasn't a psychobilly background! If Stuart wore pleasant sweaters, this guy was fresh out of Duran Duran! Very nice guy and played bass well, but was the opposite of the wild, crazy youth we were so anxious to portray. But Stu was happier. The sound really started to come together and we really started to create our own sound. Mix my 3 biggest influences: Eddie Cochran, The Meteors and The Polecats and what you got,was......erm...us. Hmm, we neaded a name.

The late seventies and early eighties saw a mass influx of "cats" bands. We had The Bluecats, Polecats, Rockats, Bopcats and, of course, Stray Cats to name a few. In my mouthy, pisstaking way I decided we needed to somehow make fun of such copycats(!).Batz....perfect,the something Batz.
Now whether I was reading Motocross or BMX Action during nature lessons at school or busy entertaining the class with Elvis impersonations somehow missed the lesson on bats. I did however recall a David Attenborough program on telly about bat guano (poop) and it's many uses in other, unsavoury parts of the world. My impressions of this were demonstrated once the Elvis renditions wore thin. Guano Batz? Change that O for an A and it rolls better. So with little regard for the English dictionary, a new word was created and a new band had a name.

So now the Guana Batz and their merry group of roadies (Binkie was the first to offer his services and his ex-skinhead status and apparent willingness to be in the middle of most fights at FFC,assured him of a job),girlfriends and manager, were in need of a gig.
FFC was still going strong and with Toms strong ties to the place, it seemed the obvious solution. Upon checking over the upcoming bands list with Steve and Colin, Tom was immediately drawn to the King Kurt gig booked for January 21st 1983.With much begging and the promise that we would help clean up the mess King Kurt were sure to create after the show, we were given the OK by the powers that be, to strut our stuff for 40 minutes before the, sure to be ,sold out crowd that night.

Andrea couldn't have been happier. King Kurt and her boyfriends band on the same stage. Tom was usually involved in creating the flyers for FFC shows so,of course, when they were collected from the printers, there it was: SPECIAL GUESTS....THE GUANA BATZ, taking up an equal share of that 8x12 (just measured it!) handout as if we were almost as popular as the headlining act. King Kurt were now venturing out from thier weekly spot at the 101 club in Clapham, of which we regularly attended and were starting to spread their mayhem across ....London..... These were fun gigs and a perfect fit for our less than serious approach to the macabre side of the scene Paul Fenech had so proudly created. Due to the many Feltham locals in the crowd and the regular Kurt following, most of which were friends, this was going to be a great first exposure for the Guana Batz.

I think we were all nervous, especially Diddle if I recall.
We all realised if we made arses of ourselves, every one of our friends would be there to witness the debacle. The place was sold out and the atmosphere was incredible. The anticipation of the eccentric entertainment of Smeggy and the boys, alongside the curiosity of what some of Felthams finest had managed to come up with, formed a buzz that's hard to put into words. But i still remember the feeling in my stomach to this day.

I'm sure that feeling was shared amongst my bandmates and I clearly remember the excitement shown by Tom and Binkie. A better group of people I could not wish to share a more incredible evening with and I cherish that night in my memories.

I recall the anticipation of getting up in front of a couple of hundred people, something I had not dreamed of 6 months earlier. I remember comforting Diddle backstage just before we climbed the stage as he puffed away on his ciggy and shook like a leaf. Steve dimmed the music and lights and from the mic at his dj's booth, he trepidatiously announced: ladies and gentlemen, from Feltham, our very own GUANA BATZ!

I wish i could recall the first song we ever played live on stage, but I do remember this much. From the moment I opened my mouth to sing the first words, I was where I needed to be. All the years of entertaining in class and at home with my Elvis moves or poor versions of Cochran songs, had come to this. The feeling of nervousness was immediately replaced with the pure pleasure of having the opportunity to show off in front of a crowd. It was intoxicating and I knew I was going to want this feeling over and over again. I loved being on stage that night and that is something that has never changed. You can keep your recording sessions and your travelling around the world or any other part of what others enjoy from being in a band. I just love being on stage.

oh but wait....there's more.....

By January 2006 we were nagging Pip for the next installment and here's his reply

We want to remind all our friends and fans to go out and pick up the latest issue of Rockabilly Magazine (42 July/August).  There is an extensive interview with our very own Pip as well as full coverage of the Texas Rockabilly Revival, where we headlined the first night! 

just posted a new blog on my personal page (guana batz top friend......shame on you if you’re not already a friend!!) about this weeks extensive batz tour.

check it out for all the latest.

hope to see ya soon,

cheers,

pip.

hey all,

just to let you know,we've just signed on with deborah at devil dolls booking (top friend) to handle the booking of US shows.she's doing a great job for us,as you can see by our expanding show calender (more to come soon!) so if you know of any promoters looking to book us,send 'em her way!

our longtime manager,gary will still handle the booking of european shows,so nothings changed there.

hope to see some of you at musink next week.

cheers,

pip.