no, but seriously...

eight, eight hundred, eight hundred and eight, eight hundred and eighteen, eight hundred and eighty, eight hundred and eighty-eight, eight hundred and eighty-five, eight hundred and eighty-four, eight hundred and eighty-nine, eight hundred and eighty-one, eight hundred and eighty-seven, eight hundred and eighty-six, eight hundred and eighty-three, eight hundred and eighty-two, eight hundred and eleven, eight hundred and fifteen, eight hundred and fifty, eight hundred and fifty-eight, eight hundred and fifty-five, eight hundred and fifty-four, eight hundred and fifty-nine, eight hundred and fifty-one, eight hundred and fifty-seven, eight hundred and fifty-six, eight hundred and fifty-three, eight hundred and fifty-two, eight hundred and five, eight hundred and forty, eight hundred and forty-eight, eight hundred and forty-five, eight hundred and forty-four, eight hundred and forty-nine, eight hundred and forty-one, eight hundred and forty-seven, eight hundred and forty-six, eight hundred and forty-three, eight hundred and forty-two, eight hundred and four, eight hundred and fourteen, eight hundred and nine, eight hundred and nineteen, eight hundred and ninety, eight hundred and ninety-eight, eight hundred and ninety-five, eight hundred and ninety-four, eight hundred and ninety-nine, eight hundred and ninety-one, eight hundred and ninety-seven, eight hundred and ninety-six, eight hundred and ninety-three, eight hundred and ninety-two, eight hundred and one, eight hundred and seven, eight hundred and seventeen, eight hundred and seventy, eight hundred and seventy-eight, eight hundred and seventy-five, eight hundred and seventy-four, eight hundred and seventy-nine, eight hundred and seventy-one, eight hundred and seventy-seven, eight hundred and seventy-six, eight hundred and seventy-three, eight hundred and seventy-two, eight hundred and six, eight hundred and sixteen, eight hundred and sixty, eight hundred and sixty-eight, eight hundred and sixty-five, eight hundred and sixty-four, eight hundred and sixty-nine, eight hundred and sixty-one, eight hundred and sixty-seven, eight hundred and sixty-six, eight hundred and sixty-three, eight hundred and sixty-two, eight hundred and ten, eight hundred and thirteen, eight hundred and thirty, eight hundred and thirty-eight, eight hundred and thirty-five, eight hundred and thirty-four, eight hundred and thirty-nine, eight hundred and thirty-one, eight hundred and thirty-seven, eight hundred and thirty-six, eight hundred and thirty-three, eight hundred and thirty-two, eight hundred and three, eight hundred and twelve, eight hundred and twenty, eight hundred and twenty-eight, eight hundred and twenty-five, eight hundred and twenty-four, eight hundred and twenty-nine, eight hundred and twenty-one, eight hundred and twenty-seven, eight hundred and twenty-six, eight hundred and twenty-three, eight hundred and twenty-two, eight hundred and two, eighteen, eighty, eighty-eight, eighty-five, eighty-four, eighty-nine, eighty-one, eighty-seven, eighty-six, eighty-three, eighty-two, eleven, fifteen, fifty, fifty-eight, fifty-five, fifty-four, fifty-nine, fifty-one, fifty-seven, fifty-six, fifty-three, fifty-two, five, five hundred, five hundred and eight, five hundred and eighteen, five hundred and eighty, five hundred and eighty-eight, five hundred and eighty-five, five hundred and eighty-four, five hundred and eighty-nine, five hundred and eighty-one, five hundred and eighty-seven, five hundred and eighty-six, five hundred and eighty-three, five hundred and eighty-two, five hundred and eleven, five hundred and fifteen, five hundred and fifty, five hundred and fifty-eight, five hundred and fifty-five, five hundred and fifty-four, five hundred and fifty-nine, five hundred and fifty-one, five hundred and fifty-seven, five hundred and fifty-six, five hundred and fifty-three, five hundred and fifty-two, five hundred and five, five hundred and forty, five hundred and forty-eight, five hundred and forty-five, five hundred and forty-four, five hundred and forty-nine, five hundred and forty-one, five hundred and forty-seven, five hundred and forty-six, five hundred and forty-three, five hundred and forty-two, five hundred and four, five hundred and fourteen, five hundred and nine, five hundred and nineteen, five hundred and ninety, five hundred and ninety-eight, five hundred and ninety-five, five hundred and ninety-four, five hundred and ninety-nine, five hundred and ninety-one, five hundred and ninety-seven, five hundred and ninety-six, five hundred and ninety-three, five hundred and ninety-two, five hundred and one, five hundred and seven, five hundred and seventeen, five hundred and seventy, five hundred and seventy-eight, five hundred and seventy-five, five hundred and seventy-four, five hundred and seventy-nine, five hundred and seventy-one, five hundred and seventy-seven, five hundred and seventy-six, five hundred and seventy-three, five hundred and seventy-two, five hundred and six, five hundred and sixteen, five hundred and sixty, five hundred and sixty-eight, five hundred and sixty-five, five hundred and sixty-four, five hundred and sixty-nine, five hundred and sixty-one, five hundred and sixty-seven, five hundred and sixty-six, five hundred and sixty-three, five hundred and sixty-two, five hundred and ten, five hundred and thirteen, five hundred and thirty, five hundred and thirty-eight, five hundred and thirty-five, five hundred and thirt y-f o u r, five hundred and thirty-nine, five hundred and thirty-one, five hundred and thirty-seven, five hundred and thirty-six, five hundred and thirty-three, five hundred and thirty-two, five hundred and three, five hundred and twelve, five hundred and twenty, five hundred and twenty-eight, five hundred and twenty-five, five hundred and twenty-four, five hundred and twenty-nine, five hundred and twenty-one, five hundred and twenty-seven, five hundred and twenty-six, five hundred and twenty-three, five hundred and twenty-two, five hundred and two, forty, forty-eight, forty-five, forty-four, forty-nine, f o rty-one, forty-seven, forty-six, fort y-three, forty-two, four, four hundred, four hundred and eight, four hundred and eighteen, four hundred and eighty, four hundred and eighty-eight, four hundred and eighty-five, four hundred and eighty-four, four hundred and eighty-nine, four hundred and eighty-one, four hundred and eighty-seven, four hundred and eighty-six, four hundred and eighty-three, four hundred and eighty-two, four hundred and eleven, four hundred and fifteen, four hundred and fifty, four hundred and fifty-eight, four hundred and fifty-five, four hundred and fifty-four, four hundred and fifty-nine, four hundred and fifty-one, four hundred and fifty-seven, four hundred and fifty-six, four hundred and fifty-three, four hundred and fifty-two, four hundred and five, four hundred and forty, four hundred and forty-eight, four hundred and forty-five, four hundred and forty-four, four hundred and forty-nine, four hundred and forty-one, four hundred and forty-seven, four hundred and forty-six, four hundred and forty-three, four hundred and forty-two, four hundred and four, four hundred and fourteen, four hundred and nine, four hundred and nineteen, four hundred and ninety, four hundred and ninety-eight, four hundred and ninety-five, four hundred and ninety-four, four hundred and ninety-nine, four hundred and ninety-one, four hundred and ninety-seven, four hundred and ninety-six, four hundred and ninety-three, four hundred and ninety-two, four hundred and one, four hundred and seven, four hundred and seventeen, four hundred and seventy, four hundred and seventy-eight, four hundred and seventy-five, four hundred and seventy-four, four hundred and seventy-nine, four hundred and seventy-one, four hundred and seventy-seven, four hundred and seventy-six, four hundred and seventy-three, four hundred and seventy-two, four hundred and six, four hundred and sixteen, four hundred and sixty, four hundred and sixty-eight, four hundred and sixty-five, four hundred and sixty-four, four hundred and sixty-nine, four hundred and sixty-one, four hundred and sixty-seven, four hundred andsixty-six, four hundred and sixty-three, four hundred and sixty-two, four hundred and ten, four hundred and thirteen, four hundred and thirty, four hundred and thirty-eight, four hundred and thirty-five, four hundred and thirty-four, four hundred and thirty-nine, four hundred and thirty-one, four hundred and thirty-seven, four hundred and thirty-six, four hundred and thirty-three, four hundred and thirty-two, four hundred and three, four hundred and twelve, four hundred and twenty, four hundred and twenty-eight, four hundred and twenty-five, four hundred and twenty-four, four hundred and twenty-nine, four hundred and twenty-one, four hundred and twenty-seven, four hundred and twenty-six, four hundred and twenty-three, four hundred and twenty-two, four hundred and two, fourteen, nine, nine hundred, nine hundred and eight, nine hundred and eighteen, nine hundred and eighty, nine hundred and eighty-eight, nine hundred and eighty-five, nine hundred and eighty-four, nine hundred and eighty-nine, nine hundred and eighty-one, nine hundred and eighty-seven, nine hundred and eighty-six, nine hundred and eighty-three, nine hundred and eighty-two, nine hundred and eleven, nine hundred and fifteen, nine hundred and fifty, nine hundred and fifty-eight, nine hundred and fifty-five, nine hundred and fifty-four, nine hundred and fifty-nine, nine hundred and fifty-one, nine hundred and fifty-seven, nine hundred and fifty-six, nine hundred and fifty-three, nine hundred and fifty-two, nine hundred and five, nine hundred and forty, nine hundred and forty-eight, nine hundred and forty-five, nine hundred and forty-four, nine hundred and forty-nine, nine hundred and forty-one, nine hundred and forty-seven, nine hundred and forty-six, nine hundred and forty-three, nine hundred and forty-two, nine hundred and four, nine hundred and fourteen, nine hundred and nine, nine hundred and nineteen, nine hundred and ninety, nine hundred and ninety-eight, nine hundred and ninety-five, nine hundred and ninety-four, nine hundred and ninety-nine, nine hundred and ninety-one, nine hundred and ninety-seven, nine hundred and ninety-six, nine hundred and ninety-three, nine hundred and ninety-two, nine hundred and one, nine hundred and seven, nine hundred and seventeen, nine hundred and seventy, nine hundred and seventy-eight, nine hundred and seventy-five, nine hundred and seventy-four, nine hundred and seventy-nine, nine hundred and seventy-one, nine hundred and seventy-seven, nine hundred and seventy-six, nine hundred and seventy-three, nine hundred and seventy-two, nine hundred and six, nine hundred and sixteen, nine hundred and sixty, nine hundred and sixty-eight, nine hundred and sixty-five, nine hundred and sixty-four, nine hundred and sixty-nine, nine hundred and sixty-one, nine hundred and sixty-seven, nine hundred and sixty-six, nine hundred and sixty-three, nine hundred and sixty-two, nine hundred and ten, nine hundred and thirteen, nine hundred and thirty, nine hundred and thirty-eight, nine hundred and thirty-five, nine hundred and thirty-four, nine hundred and thirty-nine, nine hundred and thirty-one, nine hundred and thirty-seven, nine hundred and thirty-six, nine hundred and thirty-three, nine hundred and thirty-two, nine hundred and three, nine hundred and twelve, nine hundred and twenty, nine hundred and twenty-eight, nine hundred and twenty-five, nine hundred and twenty-four, nine hundred and twenty-nine, nine hundred and twenty-one, nine hundred and twenty-seven, nine hundred and twenty-six, nine hundred and twenty-three, nine hundred and twenty-two, nine hundred and two, nineteen, ninety, ninety-eight, ninety-five, ninety-four, ninety-nine, ninety-one, ninety-seven, ninety-six, ninety-three, ninety-two, one, one hundred, one hundred and eight, one hundred and eighteen, one hundred and eighty, one hundred and eighty-eight, one hundred and eighty-five, one hundred and eighty-four, one hundred and eighty-nine, one hundred and eighty-one, one hundred and eighty-seven, one hundred and eighty-six, one hundred and eighty-three, one hundred and eighty-two, one hundred and eleven, one hundred and fifteen, one hundred and fifty, one hundred and fifty-eight, one hundred and fifty-five, one hundred and fifty-four, one hundred and fifty-nine, one hundred and fifty-one, one hundred and fifty-seven, one hundred and fifty-six, one hundred and fifty-three, one hundred and fifty-two, one hundred and five, one hundred and forty, one hundred and forty-eight, one hundred and forty-five, one hundred and forty-four, one hundred and forty-nine, one hundred and forty-one, one hundred and forty-seven, one hundred and forty-six, one hundred and forty-three, one hundred and forty-two, one hundred and four, one hundred and fourteen, one hundred and nine, one hundred and nineteen, one hundred and ninety, one hundred and ninety-eight, one hundred and ninety-five, one hundred and ninety-four, one hundred and ninety-nine, one hundred and ninety-one, one hundred and ninety-seven, one hundred and ninety-six, one hundred and ninety-three, one hundred and ninety-two, one hundred and one, one hundred and seven, one hundred and seventeen, one hundred and seventy, one hundred and seventy-eight, one hundred and seventy-five, one hundred and seventy-four, one hundred and seventy-nine, one hundred and seventy-one, one hundred and seventy-seven, one hundred and seventy-six, one hundred and seventy-three, one hundred and seventy-two, one hundred and six, one hundred and sixteen, one hundred and sixty, one hundred and sixty-eight, one hundred and sixty-five, one hundred and sixty-four, one hundred and sixty-nine, one hundred and sixty-one, one hundred and sixty-seven, one hundred and sixty-six, one hundred and sixty-three, one hundred and sixty-two, one hundred and ten, one hundred and thirteen, one hundred and thirty, one hundred and thirty-eight, one hundred and thirty-five, one hundred and thirt y-f o u r, one hundred and thirty-nine, one hundred and thirty-one, one hundred and thirty-seven, one hundred and thirty-six, one hundred and thirty-three, one hundred and thirty-two, one hundred and three, one hundred and twelve, one hundred and twenty, one hundred and twenty-eight, one hundred and twenty-five, one hundred and twenty-four, one hundred and twenty-nine, one hundred and twenty-one, one hundred and twenty-seven, one hundred and twenty-six, one hundred and twenty-three, one hundred and twenty-two, one hundred and two, one thousand, seven, seven hundred, seven hundred and eight, seven hundred and eighteen, seven hundred and eighty, seven hundred and eighty-eight, seven hundred and eighty-five, seven hundred and eighty-four, seven hundred and eighty-nine, seven hundred and eighty-one, seven hundred and eighty-seven, seven hundred and eighty-six, seven hundred and eighty-three, seven hundred and eighty-two, seven hundred and eleven, seven hundred and fifteen, seven hundred and fifty, seven hundred and fifty-eight, seven hundred and fifty-five, seven hundred and fifty-four, seven hundred and fifty-nine, seven hundred and fifty-one, seven hundred and fifty-seven, seven hundred and fifty-six, seven hundred and fifty-three, seven hundred and fifty-two, seven hundred and five, seven hundred and forty, seven hundred and forty-eight, seven hundred and forty-five, seven hundred and forty-four, seven hundred and forty-nine, seven hundred and forty-one, seven hundred and forty-seven, seven hundred and forty-six, seven hundred and forty-three, seven hundred and forty-two, seven hundred and four, seven hundred and fourteen, seven hundred and nine, seven hundred and nineteen, seven hundred and ninety, seven hundred and ninety-eight, seven hundred and ninety-five, seven hundred and ninety-four, seven hundred and ninety-nine, seven hundred and ninety-one, seven hundred and ninety-seven, seven hundred and ninety-six, seven hundred and ninety-three, seven hundred and ninety-two, seven hundred and one, seven hundred and seven, seven hundred and seventeen, seven hundred and seventy, seven hundred and seventy-eight, seven hundred and seventy-five, seven hundred and seventy-four, seven hundred and seventy-nine, seven hundred and seventy-one, seven hundred and seventy-seven, seven hundred and seventy-six, seven hundred and seventy-three, seven hundred and seventy-two, seven hundred and six, seven hundred and sixteen, seven hundred and sixty, seven hundred and sixty-eight, seven hundred and sixty-five, seven hundred and sixty-four, seven hundred and sixty-nine, seven hundred and sixty-one, seven hundred and sixty-seven, seven hundred and sixty-six, seven hundred and sixty-three, seven hundred and sixty-two, seven hundred and ten, seven hundred and thirteen, seven hundred and thirty, seven hundred and thirty-eight, seven hundred and thirty-five, seven hundred and thirty-four, seven hundred and thirty-nine, seven hundred and thirty-one, seven hundred and thirty-seven, seven hundred and thirty-six, seven hundred and thirt y-three, seven hundred and thirty-two, seven hundred and three, seven hundred and twelve, seven hundred and twenty, seven hundred and twenty-eight, seven hundred and twenty-five, seven hundred and twenty-four, seven hundred and twenty-nine, seven hundred and twenty-one, seven hundred and twenty-seven, seven hundred and twenty-six, seven hundred and twenty-three, seven hundred and twenty-two, seven hundred and two, seventeen, seventy, seventy-eight, seventy-five, seventy-four, seventy-nine, seventy-one, seventy-seven, seventy-six, seventy-three, seventy-two, six, six hundred, six hundred and eight, six hundred and eighteen, six hundred and eighty, six hundred and eighty-eight, six hundred and eighty-five, six hundred and eighty-four, six hundred and eighty-nine, six hundred and eighty-one, six hundred and eighty-seven, six hundred and eighty-six, six hundred and eighty-three, six hundred and eighty-two, six hundred and eleven, six hundred and fifteen, six hundred and fifty, six hundred and fifty-eight, six hundred and fifty-five, six hundred and fifty-four, six hundred and fifty-nine, six hundred and fifty-one, six hundred and fifty-seven, six hundred and fifty-six, six hundred and fifty-three, six hundred and fifty-two, six hundred and five, six hundred and forty, six hundred and forty-eight, six hundred and forty-five, six hundred and forty-four, six hundred and forty-nine, six hundred and forty-one, six hundred and forty-seven, six hundred and forty-six, six hundred and forty-three, six hundred and forty-two, six hundred and four, six hundred and fourteen, six hundred and nine, six hundred and nineteen, six hundred and ninety, six hundred and ninety-eight, six hundred and ninety-five, six hundred and ninety-four, six hundred and ninety-nine, six hundred and ninety-one, six hundred and ninety-seven, six hundred and ninety-six, six hundred and ninety-three, six hundred and ninety-two, six hundred and one, six hundred and seven, six hundred and seventeen, six hundred and seventy, six hundred and seventy-eight, six hundred and seventy-five, six hundred and seventy-four, six hundred and seventy-nine, six hundred and seventy-one, six hundred and seventy-seven, six hundred and seventy-six, six hundred and seventy-three, six hundred and seventy-two, six hundred and six, six hundred and sixteen, six hundred and sixty, six hundred and sixty-eight, six hundred and sixty-five, six hundred and sixty-four, six hundred and sixty-nine, six hundred and sixty-one, six hundred and sixty-seven, six hundred and sixty-six, six hundred and sixty-three, six hundred and sixty-two, six hundred and ten, six hundred and thirteen, six hundred and thirty, six hundred and thirty-eight, six hundred and thirty-five, six hundred and thirty-four, six hundred and thirty-nine, six hundred and thirty-one, six hundred and thirty-seven, six hundred and thirty-six, six hundred and thirty-three, six hundred and thirty-two, six hundred and three, six hundred and twelve, six hundred and twenty, six hundred and twenty-eight, six hundred and twenty-five, six hundred and twenty-four, six hundred and twenty-nine, six hundred and twenty-one, six hundred and twenty-seven, six hundred and twenty-six, six hundred and twenty-three, six hundred and twenty-two, six hundred and two, sixteen, sixty, sixty-eight, sixty-five, sixty-four, sixty-nine, sixty-one, sixty-seven, sixty-six, sixty-three, sixty-two, ten, thirteen, thirt y, thirty-eight, thirty-five, thirty-four, thirty-nine, thirty-one, thirty-seven, thirty-six, thirty-three, thirty-two, three, three hundred, three hundred and eight, three hundred and eighteen, three hundred and eighty, three hundred and eighty-eight, three hundred and eighty-five, three hundred and eighty-four, three hundred and eighty-nine, thre e hundred and eighty-one, three hundred and eighty-seven, three hundred and eighty-six, three hundred and eighty-three, thre e hundred and eighty-two, three hundred and eleven, three hundred and fifteen, three hundred and fifty, three hundred and fifty-eight, three hundred and fifty-five, three hundred and fifty-four, three hundred and fifty-nine, three hundred and fifty-one, three hundred and fifty-seven, three hundred and fifty-six, three hundred and fifty-three, three hundred and fifty-two, three hundred and five, three hundred and forty, three hundred and forty-eight, three hundred and forty-five, three hundred and forty-four, three hundred and forty-nine, three hundred and forty-one, three hundred and forty-seven, three hundred and forty-six, three hundred and forty-three, three hundred and forty-two, three hundred and four, three hundred and fourteen, three hundred and nine, three hundred and nineteen, three hundred and ninety, three hundred and ninety-eight, three hundred and ninety-five, three hundred and ninety-four, three hundred and ninety-nine, three hundred and ninety-one, three hundred and ninety-seven, three hundred and ninety-six, three hundred and ninety-three, three hundred and ninety-two, three hundred and one, three hundred and seven, three hundred and seventeen, three hundred and seventy, three hundred and seventy-eight, three hundred and seventy-five, three hundred and seventy-four, three hundred and seventy-nine, three hundred and seventy-one, three hundred and seventy-seven, three hundred and seventy-six, three hundred and seventy-three, three hundred and seventy-two, three hundred and six, thre e hundred and sixteen, three hundred and sixty, three hundred and sixty-eight, three hundred and sixty-five, three hundred and sixty-four, three hundred and sixty-nine, three hundred and sixty-one, three hundred and sixty-seven, three hundred and sixty-six, three hundred and sixty-three, three hundred and sixty-two, three hundred and ten, three hundred and thirteen, three hundred and thirty, three hundred and thirty-eight, three hundred and thirty-five, thre e hundred and thirty-four, three hundred and thirty-nine, three hundred and thirty-one, three hundred and thirty-seven, three hundred and thirty-six, three hundred and thirty-three, three hundred and thirty-two, three hundred and three, three hundred and twelve, three hundred and twenty, three hundred and twenty-eight, three hundred and twenty-five, three hundred and twenty-four, three hundred and twenty-nine, three hundred and twenty-one, three hundred and twenty-seven, three hundred and twenty-six, three hundred and twenty-three, three hundred and twenty-two, three hundred and two, twelve, twenty, twenty-eight, twenty-five, twenty-four, twenty-nine, twenty-one, twenty-seven, twenty-six, twenty-three, twenty-two, two, two hundred...



... two hundred and eight, two hundred and eighteen, two hundred and eighty, two hundred and eighty-eight, two hundred and eighty-five, two hundred and eighty-four, two hundred and eighty-nine, two hundred and eighty-one, two hundred and eighty-seven, two hundred and eighty-six, two hundred and eighty-three, two hundred and eighty-two, two hundred and eleven, two hundred and fifteen, two hundred and fifty, two hundred and fifty-eight, two hundred and fifty-five, two hundred and fifty-four, two hundred and fifty-nine, two hundred and fifty-one, two hundred and fifty-seven, two hundred and fifty-six, two hundred and fifty-three, two hundred and fifty-two, two hundred and five, two hundred and forty, two hundred and forty-eight, two hundred and forty-five, two hundred and forty-four, two hundred and forty-nine, two hundred and forty-one, two hundred and forty-seven, two hundred and forty-six, two hundred and forty-three, two hundred and forty-two, two hundred and four, two hundred and fourteen, two hundred and nine, two hundred and nineteen, two hundred and ninety, two hundred and ninety-eight, two hundred and ninety-five, two hundred and ninety-four, two hundred and ninety-nine, two hundred and ninety-one, two hundred and ninety-seven, two hundred and ninety-six, two hundred and ninety-three, two hundred and ninety-two, two hundred and one, two hundred and seven, two hundred and seventeen, two hundred and seventy, two hundred and seventy-eight, two hundred and seventy-five, two hundred and seventy-four, two hundred and seventy-nine, two hundred and seventy-one, two hundred and seventy-seven, two hundred and seventy-six, two hundred and seventy-three, two hundred and seventy-two, two hundred and six, two hundred and sixteen, two hundred and sixty, two hundred and sixty-eight, two hundred and sixty-five, two hundred and sixty-four, two hundred and sixty-nine, two hundred and sixty-one, two hundred and sixty-seven, two hundred and sixty-six, two hundred and sixty-three, two hundred and sixty-two, two hundred and ten, two hundred and thirteen, two hundred and thirty, two hundred and thirty-eight, two hundred and thirty-five, two hundred and thirt y-f o u r, two hundred and thirty-nine, two hundred and thirty-one, two hundred and thirty-seven, two hundred and thirty-six, two hundred and thirty-three, two hundred and thirty-two, two hundred and three, two hundred and twelve, two hundred and twenty, two hundred and twenty-eight, two hundred and twenty-five, two hundred and twenty-four, two hundred and twenty-nine, two hundred and twenty-one, two hundred and twenty-seven, two hundred and twenty-six, two hundred and twenty-three, two hundred and twenty-two, two hundred and two

college radio hazing, krob (not a charming drunk), "harry potter and the black leather cunt" by j.k. rowling, i wish i were dead, (and yes) even more excerpts from "do or dyi", the reluctant intellect, messages for beverly, 16 bitch pile-up, scotch tape and sprocket holes, wayne butane, cuban misery, something with coconut on it, es - kukat ovathyvla kuuntelijoita -> john lurie - tuesday night in memphis -> tony mason-cox - pickin', september 12, 1999, whining for sex, bob ralston, chris watson - weather report, celebrities for racism, sleep aerosol (chromium descensions), "the bats" (dedicated to my lovely assistant) w/ john oswald (cassette-only era plunderphonia), julee cruise - the space for love, field recording concert w/ erik satie and ketty lester, excerpt from "henry flynt's back-porch hillbilly blues", endscape from KrOB's "the longest day of the year", laurie anderson - four, three, two, one -> the 5678's - harlem shuffle -> sleater-kinney - little mouth -> helge and the firefuckers - whiter shade of pale -> john zorn - tv eye, and my brain is anatomically incorrect.

sunset stripe hullabaloo, dustin hoffman as lenny bruce, daniel johnston - don't play cards with satan
--
the beginning of the end of thanksgiving
--
language we (americans) still supress, into the ether, could we feel? - just what is not true, quiet american, scream theory (part 1), zoviet france, water and birds -> amy denio - dishwasher, robyn hitchcock - one too many mornings, dead man soundtrack excerpt, gary rydstrom sound effects, los lobos - uncomplicated, electrical storm, laurie anderson and lou reed - in our sleep, cat people soundtrack excerpt -> marlon brando's thankgiving prayer, ambient cannibalism, dispatches from the land of make-believe, lisa germano -guillotine, scream theory (part 2 - italian space movie version), "i still can't communicate with anybody", intermission control, brown whorenet -> paul stanley reads the bible -> bizarro bob dylan, the herculoids
--
the end of the end of thanksgiving
--
the art scene vs. noise rock, the disney blender, the langley school music project - good vibrations, marianne faithfull - alone, scream theory (part 3 - mimi roger's neighborhood), game rain (sleep aerosol 7 excerpt), tuxedomoon - i heard it through the grapevine, firesign theater - the breaking of the president, stimulus flashback wallpaper party -> negativland cover band compilation, "consumption is being standardized", people like us - who cares?, inarticulate alienation, cutting the final cut -> scream theory (part 4 - the screamening), questions from the audience (clicking noises outro)



--
the end of the beginning of thanksgiving (((mp3)))

leon redbone - shiek of araby
-> apathetic identification / KrOB (sfx for gotham)->
lenny bruce - the palladium -- (background: miles davis - kind of blue, bill laswell & pete namlook - psychonavigation, quiet american - usa, gurgle, monkey pod)

--monkey boy is not here--

wolf theme -> "what show?" -> classic KrOB (we will have these moments to remember, hard loop: blacky ranchette, gps brittania, george w. bush's "hard work"), alex and the droogs - singin in the rain, deep north compilation excerpt, more telephone calls, ergo phizmiz - zip, cliff martinez - solaris soundtrack excerpt, dina's break-up (taped phone call), philip glass - candyman soundtrack excerpt, alvin curran, jerry falwell intro -> robin and crystal bernard - the monkey song, website sfx from "sky captain and the world of tomorrow", danny elfman - spiderman 2 soundtrack excerpt, david lynch - rabbits (pt. 8), jon brion - punch drunk love soundtrack excerpt, chris watson, howard shore - lord of the rings (the two towers) soundtrack excerpt), sfx from "dinosaur make-out party" or "age of reptiles", i'd like to buy the world a pepsi, mindboggling foibles, magnetic fields - heroes, work work, the kinks - give the people what they want / kbox radio dallas - the assassination of president kennedy, neil young - dead man soundtrack excerpt, jerry lewis - state of the union, "weird al" yankovic - midnight star, video game instructional disc - "stargate" lessons/john williams - star wars: attack of the clones soundtrack excerpt/ikue mori, bbc, psychic tv -> new york radio collage from the night john lennon was killed (courtesy wfmu), no nougat is bad nougat, the button - i am the walrus, the guilt structure of npr, the breeders, if i had a hammer film: the movie, r.e.m. - superman, cassette-boy - anne frankingmachine, the breeders (again), the herculoids (a waste of time), brian eno - lizard point -> toto - dune soundtrack excerpt



these recordings came from a cassette found in a thrift store

BILLY HYBELS - SATAN WORSHIP
PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3 | PART 4 | PART 5

a chunk (four minutes and twenty seconds) of "the goonies", sfx loop from "god of war", igor wakhevitch, walt disney (anything's possible in disneyland)

harry nilsson - early in the morning
david bowie - andy warhol
negativland - snuggles
ogden edsl - dead puppies
robin holcomb - dead horse
--
KrOB and/or (enter:) my lovely assistant
--
tom lehrer - poisoning pigeons in the park
loudon wainwright III - good ship venus
the police - king of pain
applesauce -> grateful dead drum circles, gino robair, tape recorder theme park excerpts, howard shore - lord of the rings: the return of the king, douglas quin, indonesian soundscapes - evening sounds, morning rain, tapes
--
KrOB and/or (exit:) my lovely assistant (discovery of uvulan cancer) - pete goldie is sans uvula
--
true/false loop, q.r. ghazala, matmos and bjork, beatles loop, thank you list from "the soft pink truth", "now everybody's gonna think....", eyes wide shut soundtrack excerpt, more tapes, i love you (like morning), i'm so lost without you baby -> it's all in your head fm excerpt, pink floyd - shine on you crazy diamond (beginning), ken nordine - truth mute, pink floyd - shine on you crazy diamond (end), rainstorm, ergo phizmiz - radio experiments, ....acceptable to our satan, even more tapes, janeane garofalo - hbo comedy special excerpt

soon

(railroad intro)
the button - merry christmas everyone
quiet american - circumlocution
-
dj shadow -
murari - easy journey
the murmurs - you suck
(walter matthau bit from "a face in the crowd")
-
national lampoon - magical misery tour (genius is pain)
("if you liked star wars and raiders..." -> work work)
out of band experience - bonerland
junkyard dogs - breakin' the law
people like us - nobody does
-
(kid -> dinosaur pt. 1)
(dinosaur pt. 2 -> war pigs)
-
(hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy music outro)

cub - the day i said i goodbye, negativland - guns, i don't believe (i put a candy-coated shell on) you, beat happening - teenage caveman, try to be a listener - remain inside the sound collage, morphology, longevity, incept dates, one of them is gorgeous, eat (pasta) to live, the league of infinite justice- united we stand, cough and sinus, the windham hill of comedy, robitussin and desperation, elvis presley has been on the charts for 13 minutes, contact microphones, the curse of the goddamn hipsters, frank chu in pogform, in heaven (everything is fine), 3-head monte, manipulated by computers, backstage labia distraction, stormtrooper in dreamtime, there's gonna be some chaos, prelude to chaos, chaos, chaotic neutralization (lou reed - heroin), a small accumulation of details, marilyn monroe - heatwave, they might be giants - istanbul (not constantinople), white stripes - hotel yorba, howe gelb - explore you, hope sandoval - slow twitch, david bowie - the bewlay brothers, the pretty things - s.f. sorrow is born, the bangles - walk like an egyptian, playlisping -> the school of rock -> molding somebody into a nice country kid -> playlisping, a world of outmoded ideas and pete goldie's ruination

KrOB'S YOU TUBE "CLICK OF THE WEEK" (9.13.06)

don costello "performing" on "stairway to stardom" (circa 1984)









KrOB'S YOU TUBE "CLICK OF THE WEEK" (9.20.06)

metalocalypse - "COFFEE KILLS" (with titles + previews)









KrOB'S YOU TUBE "CLICK OF THE WEEK" (9.27.06)

the carpenters - calling occupants of interplanetary craft

THiS WEAK VERSION.19 minus .05 - "loop this"


9/28/06
8pm-10pm:

robin coomer from loop!station (the best band in san francisco) is my guest for two hours. all things robin and sam, with a krob moment or two. is everybody crazy?

listen to the show... (mp3)


THiS WEAK VERSION.19 - "dreams about fire and bedroom eyes"

10pm-midnight

loop!station offends and rewards caller(s), even if, thank you and goodnight from the wailing looper, the krob lobby, celebrities (murk and dice) pt. 2, cartoons from beyond the moon, psychic ballast, the 70's, monet (that's what i want), fear of wanting (claustrophobia vs, intimacy), pillows mothering, deadweight revisited, sexy reverb and bad modulation, birdsaw revisited, a wet paper towel roll and a vortex of mink stoles, star trek, the krob lobby pt. 2, jim carroll - female as thunder, robin and angelo in the age of reptiles, another night talk excerpt, people like us - downtown once more, willem dafoe reads "the raven", tortured is the worst kind of lover, my anime cassette mix from seattle, talking heads - the great curve, my anime cassette mix (continued) and other pre-century mix-tapes.

the entire show is archived here (mp3)

there's a ticket with your name on it.

that was all that prepared me for what would be my first burning man.

it had been weeks of missing cloe and feeling lost and miserable since my birthday of august 16th. then, after the loop!station drive-in show, it was like, "well, now what do i do?" i could make cloe's video or i could try one more time on craigslist to get a ride to her. i got some emails from cloe saying that, "there's a ticket with your name on it" and that maybe if i did, in fact get a ride, i would make the trip. i figured, i'd take my chances with the desert, because this waiting at home shit...something has to give. i craigslisted for a one-way drive to burning in the early pre-dawn morning of the 2nd of september, and got a call back for a ride about 4 hours later. i packed some clothes, water, an ipod, and a light saber. me and my ride, brian, a google employee from mountain view, met me at ritual coffee roasters to hook up with lena, a german exchange student working for immigration rights. by noon, i was on the road. nobody was holding tickets. i told my story about chicken having my ticket...but how to get a hold of him? cloe works for dpw and doug, who took care of my cat, muse, and who has many years of burning man experience as a ranger, was saying that they all have radios and if she is dpw then people will know or know how to reach her people. so, i wasn't all that worried. i was on the road to cloe, and that was the best. no real desert preperation. just a fix. i scored a ride. how will she look when she sees me? hotter than a pepper sprout? un operachi romantico? i don't know. long days and nights of being without cloe, really missing her and the heart growing fonder thing, thinking about just how beautiful she is to me and how much i've come to love her. the long distance thing wasn't working for me, though. i wasn't eating or sleeping very well. everyday life, sans cloe, seemed cold and flavorless. meanwhile, she's probably having way more fun without me. maybe i'm not good enough for her anymore. (sob) (pain) lonely for my girlfreind, pure and simple. anyway (sniff), i'm getting ahead of myself.


so, we need to go to reno, because there, lena's ticket is supposedly waiting at a fed-ex building and it turned out it wasn't. so now, brian's getting a little nervous as we just head to gerlach from reno as the sun is going down. tearing up the nevada highway at almost double the speed limit on some stretches, the sun setting to the west, like a galaxies' spiral arms, so gorgeous. we arrive at the gates of black rock city just minutes into darkness. neon, flame bursts and fireworks can be seen covering an enormous distance. brian drives on the dusty road right past the gate and lena is saying that, "there's a guy waving his fist and chasing us, i think, but it was hard to tell from the dust." they both are getting into this "let me do the talking" and "what are we going to say if..." cop paranoia. sure enough they were eventually stopped by burly gate guys. brian was putting on a "we don't have any tickets" and "can't you just let us in to see the burning of the man?"...like, just-be-cool type stuff, which these guys were so not going for. they were all, "the burning of the what?....what are you talking about?", just ready to filet this guy and double him back. i got out of the car and said that i was here for cloe and that she could get in touch with chicken john , who has my ticket, supposedly with my name on it. i talked of cloe and one of the guys responded, "yeah. i know cloe. dpw." and he was trying to get the other guy to recognize her: "you know cloe. you know that sign at the commisary?"... (for some reason i remembered this later as 'you must be cloe to eat')..."it says, cloe required beyond this point". the gate guys softened a bit. not as carnivorous, they could see that i wasn't in bullshit mode, saying, "well... he dropped cloe as a name, sooo.. ok, we're gonna let you guys in. understand, this is a really big favor we're giving you." i told him, "yes, i appreciated it. thank you". cloe's namedrop counted for $900. triumph. we were on our way into black rock city. "you handled that really well!", lena told me. i laughed. we were in.





we park near center camp between a car that was neighbor to the pirate cat radio cracktory; a green-striped tron meets pac-man art car. on the right was a camp projecting koyaanisqatsi with good volume for the music. the pirate cat radio drive-in came to mind. if the show had been at the old studios just 2 days before...you'd see the same kind of stuff. i was like, "i know that car!", "pirate cat radio! whoa! philip glass movie! weird!" i bolted out of the car towards center camp, i was told there'd be computers there that had location information. i went to coffee house and got a cappuccino and asked for dpw. the coffee girls were saying, "well, the dpw parade just happened and they're all out at the man now." i looked behind me toward the man. no sense of scale, just an enormity that adrenalized me into fleeting. i was told that playa info was closed, turned around to look for my ride, and he was gone. my stuff was locked inside the car. so, now, i had to get out to the nucleus. if cloe was out there with a dpw parade, maybe she'd be easy to spot (a naive melody if ever there was one). i stole a bike from the grounds of center camp and rode out towards the man. everybody had a glow-stick, flashlight or something to identify themselves in the darkness. very few people were walking or riding without illumination. i was one of those people. with no water and a fever pitch, i circled the man amongst the art cars, flame blasters, cherry pickers, and thousands and thousands of burners as the man's neon arms raised, signifying that the burn was close. i asked rangers for dpw. i asked dpw for cloe. a couple people recognized me, but had no idea who cloe was. most of the rangers had radios, but only one or two would be willing to put out a call. the calls that were made for me turned up nothing but shrugged shoulders. the event was pure chaos, even though, the expression on most of the faces showed basically no sign of spasticism. this became kind of alienating. like tim robbins on new years eve in the last reel of "the hudsucker proxy", i was definitley out of sync, in the midst of a very wild and colorful scene. i rode up to the neverwas haul and asked if anyone knew chicken john. no dice. i couldn't even board. too full. the man began to burn with people and fireworks going off. my attention was divided between watching the burn and using the light to scan for cloe. i stopped to take it in. it looked great, but it was a party and i had nothing to celebrate. when the man crumbled and the crowd began to loosen slightly, i continued my search.




my stolen bike was serving me well. i had snagged glowy things and was riding back towards the camps. deathguild and the thunderdome were things i had remembered from half-listened-to tales of cloe's previous burning men. asking around with the same questions, "are you guys dpw?", "do you know cloe?", "you still workin' on that?". i run into a woman named "nurse", and she recognizes me and she thinks she knows who cloe is. she also has a radio and is the first person who actually kind of wants to help me out. she puts in an "allcom for cloe", and i had a clue: allcom. even though, the radio call didn't turn up anything, they said that maybe i should try "the ghetto", as that's where dpw is camped. i run around the streets, trying to follow directions, but i'm so lost. after, what can only be described as, a family circus trajectory, i get lost and run into squeaky. she tries putting in a radio call for cloe, but comes up with nothing. she tells me, "dpw is at the ghetto". so, look for and eventually find "the ghetto". there's a strong strider heading toward the trailers and i ask him if he knows cloe. he says, "yes". the first person yet, who really knows who she is. i ask if she is staying here. he says, "cloe's too pretentious to stay in the ghetto." i say, "oh...so she too pretentious, huh?" he says , "yeah, fuck you!", slamming his editorial door in my face. uh-huh. great. now i was lost again. back to just asking around to see who knows who. i thought i'd just continue to try every dpw or ranger i could find. i rode up next to a slow driving jeep and asked, "are you dpw?" she said, "yes". i said, "i'm looking for cloe. do you know who that is? i thought she was staying at the ghetto, but, maybe she's not." "do you know her playa name?", she asked. i was clueless. she told me that dpw were spread out some. more good news. but, she had me follow her to the depot on the outer rim and we might find some answers there. i waited for a guy who put in numerous calls, "allcom for cloe".... someone came back with a pirate cat radio reference. warmer, warmer....on the radio, the guy calling back to the depot man, asked, "what is his reaction when i say, pirate cat radio?". i say, "i know exactly what he's talking about." the message is relayed, and some searching went on to discover that cloe was staying at 7:15 and brave. i had a cup of water and set out to find 7:15 and brave. it was dark, dusty and the street signs were almost non-existent, add to that, no sense of direction on the peak night of the burning man maelstrom. i indirectly found myself in a dark strip of the camp grid, and spotted two darth vader force fx light sabers. i recognize dark angel as one of the duellists and ask if cloe is staying here. sensing my tourism perhaps, he asks, "who wants to know?". i answer, trying my best to bland my agitation, "i don't know, i'm her boyfriend or something, i might have an interest." he instantly drops his cold front and says, "hey krob! how's it going?" his sith-mate, blackbeard was really excited to meet me. "wow, krob, you started it all!", referring to my birthday present for cloe; an anakin skywalker force fx light saber. when i gave it to her, she was abound the 12 galaxies with total glee. she told me that when she showed off her saber to everyone when she arrived at burning man in early august, the dpw had a geek-gasm for it. it spawned a mass order for light sabers from the force fx line. i felt like a rock star. scoping cloe's trailer, i was close to mission accomplished. i stepped inside her trailer, something that looked like a crashed escape pod from the white-trash mothership, and saw her birds and pictures of me, her, and old friends. i was so excited. it was only a matter of time before i would see cloe's face. d.a. walked with me to chicken's camp and it was empty, save an anonymous sleeper on one of the couches. i scored some more water and took a swig of whisky and we then both walked to clubjub. maybe cloe would end up there. we hung out, i had a beer and met nipps. we exchanged freindly jibberish and, in minutes after telling her my adventures up to that point, ended up riding off on our "liberated" bicycles towards the playa. she said, "if you want to run into people, just go out and roll around. i'd just go out." we rode together, but seperated somehow and i was alone on the playa, slightly drunk and definitely happy, riding at high speeds amongst the overlapping dj cultures and art installations. burning man was mine for the tasting.


(to be continued)