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Tuesday, December 02, 2008 9:27 PM

Eye See You

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Tuesday, November 04, 2008 10:34 AM

Boner.

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Thursday, September 11, 2008 8:50 AM

My Redneck Sleep Number

I love my redneck sleep number bed. It's awesome. Cost me $120 at Target and came with an air pump. All I have to do is inflate it to increase my sleep number, and deflate it to decrease my sleep number. Then, use a tire pressure gauge and BAM! my sleep number is 32psi.

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Tuesday, September 02, 2008 12:08 PM

Ahh, life! What a Tangled Web We Weave.

Well, I'm back to work. Finally. I'm glad everything got worked out in the end. My computer and all of the rest of my stuff is still at Fabrizio's house. He's not giving into demands, and I'm not about to back down to his 'bullying'. Lawsuit, here I come.

Another thing...

I saw Flobots and Ludo in concert the other day. Great show. They played a couple covers, and two unreleased songs from their upcoming album. Which, I must tell you - is going to be pretty damn good just from those two songs.

Ludo was okay, but meh... I wasn't all too excited to see them.

Sunday, August 31st - 101X Stage Located on the North side of the Bridge on Sunday

Time Band
5:35 - 6:35 Sounds Under Radio
6:55 - 7:40 Alpha Rev
8:00 - 9:00 Ludo
9:30 - 10:30 Flobots

Oh, and to top it all off... the show was free.

Heh. Well, it had a $5 cover but Jeff and I 'socially engineered' the doorman and he let us in thinking we were 'stage hands'.

Good times.

I love Austin. It's been damn good to me.

-- Ivan

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Sunday, August 24, 2008 6:30 PM

Rosanne. The Show Makes Me Happy.

You know, I love the show Rosanne.

A lot of people ask me 'why?' and to be honest, I think it is the ideal family life. The idea of people being so loving, yet making fun of one another with some ...well, funny but nasty jokes. I mean, does anyone else think it's almost as the most ideal family?

Ahh well, it's what I want to work towards. I think I've seen enough episodes.

-- Ivan

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Saturday, August 23, 2008 6:16 AM

Everything’s Bigger in Texas. Except me, I’m Still Short.

Wow, a lot has happened in the last week. For one, it was my birthday week. Nothing really exciting (in a positive sense) happened (aside from drinking, obviously).

However, Saturday night I get locked out of my house. Apparently, the landlord changed all the locks and kept all my clothes, laptop, web cam, and my Rebel camera. Few days later, he let me take my clothes but still kept my electronics.

I get off work around 10pm, go out for a few hours, and come home by around 3am only to find out that the locks have been changed. Pissed me off to no end. Called the cops, but there's not much they can do.

Then, few days later I get suspended from work for [censored]. Unfortunately, I can't talk about it - but hopefully everything will work out for the better.

I look at it like a vacation with pay, without using any of my vacation time "pending investigation".

I freaked out about it a few days ago. I love my job. A lot. I mean, hell, I moved to Texas to remain with the company. Took a major pay cut and I'm still loyal as hell to them. Ahh well. For the time being, all is well in the southern front.

Now I'm just sitting here waiting for Jeff to come by, we're gonna go hang out at Kerbey for a while. Then, I'll come home and go to sleep and hopefully get my paycheck tomorrow so I can pay rent.

Well'p, I'm out. Have fun. Stay safe. Enjoy this video, I love the theme:

-- Ivan

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Friday, August 01, 2008 5:16 AM

Best Prank Ever

I don't know about you guys, but I love this video. Let me know what you think.

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Monday, July 28, 2008 1:44 PM

The 5 Most Obviously Drug-Fueled TV Appearances Ever

Wow, well I'll be damned. I haven't blogged in over a month. I'm sorry kids.

I have a great one for you though today. It is truly the epitome of great blogs... or something like that.

Anyways, quick update for life in Austin. It's pretty amazing. I'm liking my job a lot, but am starting to get that 'corporate' feel about it and how things are run. Apple is changing on the inside, and it hurts. A lot. I can't dive any deeper into it, but lets just say that overall employee morale is at an all-time low. Me? I am incredibly optimistic about Apple's internal management and have high hopes. As for other employees... well, not so much.

On with the post.

I read an article tonight on cracked.com (let me tell you, the most hilarious web site ever. Read their articles. Seriously.)

The article I read was titled 'The 5 Most Obviously Drug-Fueled TV Appearances Ever'

Now, if the title doesn't catch your attention maybe the video's will.

Check this out:

First, we have Crispin Glover on Letterman.

Holy shit! Can you say PCP, Speed, Coke or Meth? Drugs are bad enough as it is, but making a complete ass of yourself on national television? Way to go Crispin, way to go.

Want to see the whole set? Jump on over to Cracked.com and check out the article.

http://www.cracked.com/article_15295_5-most-obviously-drug-fueled-tv-appearances-ever.html

-- Ivan

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Monday, June 23, 2008 6:48 PM

RIP George Carlin - The Funniest Man on Earth

RIP George Carlin
1937 - 2008
You will be missed.

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Wednesday, June 18, 2008 11:22 PM

My Finances. The Logic Behind Taking a Cab to Work.

I was doing the math last night, and despite me taking a cab everywhere I go, and eating out once in a while - I am still saving money by doing so.

Let me break it down by price:

$6 to get to work. Two ways (there and back) = $12/day. 7 days a week. $12/day x 7 = $84.

If I had a car, it would cost me $45 to fill it up every three days or so. So, lets say... roughly around $90/week (I'm giving it some leniency as well). So, I'm saving so far, $6 by taking a cab to work. Now, that's not even a really accurate number because I did the math utilizing a full 7-day week. Even though I only work 5 days a week. The other two days, I don't even go anywhere unless it's to the bar (which is roughly around $4 cab ride to my bar). There and back, $8. Which pretty much makes up for anything else.

Most of the time, I don't even take a cab to the bar - it's half a mile away. I can walk. Which saves me right there as well.

Now, that's just transportation.

More to come later.

-- Ivan

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Sunday, June 08, 2008 11:01 PM

In Austin. Day 5 (or 7).

So, here I am in sunny Austin, TX hanging out at the house that I currently live in. I've been here for a week now, and despite being incredibly home-sick and missing the good life of California - I must admit that Austin is an awesome town to live in. Granted it's pretty useless when you don't have a car, but I see it as something that will happen in due-time.

Besides, it's only 3 months of waiting without a car (which, by then I'm sure I'll get one). There are a few coworkers that moved down here with and are slowly but surely getting themselves situated. I'm happy where I am. I like this house, I like the people that I live with and I don't think I'd change a thing about it.

The only thing that really bums me out is A) I don't have a car (I think I mentioned that already) and B) Starting tomorrow, I'll be doing nothing but work - freakin' balls-to-the-wall.

I live in a relatively nice home.

It's large and fully furnished. I pay $675/mo in rent and is approximately 3.5 miles away from work.

This should be a rather fun experience.

We'll see how it goes.

-- Ivan

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Sunday, May 18, 2008 10:33 PM

Burger King... You Sneaky Bastards.

Dear Burger King,

I love your fries. I ordered a double whopper with no onion. I love your burgers too. Even the girl that helped me behind the counter, was polite and complimented me on my shirt.

Which, I must admit, is a pretty witty shirt. Not a lot of people in the 'ghetto' know what a '.JPG' is.

However, THIS:

Is UNACCEPTABLE! An ONION ring? I open up my bag in anticipation of my delicious burger and fries and get completely and utterly disgusted by this sight. As a matter of fact, the burger I already ate almost came back up. In my recent years of eating, I have learned that food only tastes good going down. It's unidirectional.

Unless you have an alcohol-filled night before, to which you wake up next a naked midget, used condom wrappers and a banana with an awkward brown stain on the side and for some reason its smell reminds you of a pair of year old boxers that you've never washed because of some weird year-long experiment on hygeine and how you'd smell after never whiping your ass.

Wait.

That was... uhm... shit. (no pun intended)

ANYWAYS.

Onion ring in my fries is unacceptable, you sneaky bastards. Even though I ate everything (but the onion ring) I demand a refund and a personal apology from the president/CEO of the company.

Sincerely,

Ivan

(just kidding, I was bored and ended up donating that onion to a homeless guy that begs for things. I gotta give him credit though, he didn't beg this time. Mostly because he didn't want it. So I just threw it at him. I blame society. You spoil him by giving him money, but when an honest citizen wants to give him some food? Nope. Doesn't want it. You gotta FORCE them to take it... and sometimes that means an onion ring to the head. Ahh, such is life.)

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Monday, May 05, 2008 1:32 AM

Moving to Texas

So, after careful deliberation I have decided to move to Austin, TX and accept the position at Apple. Now THAT'S freakin' dedication to the company. Don't you think? My first day at work is going to be June 9th, and am thinking that I will be leaving on the 28th, or 29th. Wish me luck! I already have a place out there, I just have to work out some details with the person whom I'll be living with.

But all in all, so far it seems like a GO.

Thanks cats!

-- Ivan

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Thursday, May 01, 2008 10:05 PM

Tough Call.

Well, after almost 4 years of my dedication to Apple - I got laid off. Which, at first sounds terrible, but in all honesty, it's not. They're giving me a lot of options as to what I can do and a couple weeks to think about it. For one, two months with pay. As if I am still on their payroll, and going to work every day, reaching goal, and going home.

Second, they offered me a position in Austin, TX. They cover some of the relocation expenses, I get sign-on bonus's, retaining bonus, all in all equaling out to be about an extra $18k over an 8 month period.

Now the hard part. Personally, I have no problem leaving if no one else was affected by it. That's not the case now, because I have a girlfriend whom I spoke with about the 'possibility' of relocation to Austin. Kinda went well, but we still have a few specifics to work out. In any event, each scenario is very appealing to me.

If I took the position in Austin, and relocated, I'd have good money to start out with. If I decided to stay in Sacramento, I can apply for a job within Apple in a different department, and Apple would give me $5000 severance pay.

What to do, what to do. What would you do? Help me out here. It's a life-changing decision, and I don't want to make the wrong one.

-- Ivan

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Saturday, April 12, 2008 4:17 AM

No Taxation Without Representation

"No taxation without representation"

What do I get for my federal taxes? Our public schools are failing, Social Security is insolvent, Medicare & Medicaid are run by a corrupt government that uses taxpayer money to overpay the corporations that run it. Our military is in shambles, our economy is on the brink of complete collapse and all our leaders can think of to do in order to solve the problem is to use our tax dollars to bail out the mistakes of corporations while Americans end up homeless and broke. And stuck with the bill.

Do people understand how much money we have spent in Iraq? Seriously really, get a grip and really GET how much money has gone down the hole? And even if they do, do they realize that the Iraq bill, from a dollar perspective, HASN'T COME DUE YET??? The shit going on with the economy right now has NOTHING to do with the THREE FUCKING TRILLION DOLLARS that this clusterfuck in Iraq will eventually cost us.

$3,000,000,000,000 / 300,000,000 = $10,0000/ea.

That means that RIGHT NOW, without ANY interest, each and every American in this country is in for $10 fucking K. On top of our current federal and state income tax burden.

Now, I pay for electricity. I pay for internet. I pay for television and I pay for my phone. The tax I pay at the pump covers most of the cash either state or federal government spend on shit like road repairs, but whatever. I pay for the gas to heat my home and cook my food. I pay a shitload at the hospital and even pay tax on some of that shit. I pay sales tax. I even pay retail tax, even though the corporations pass ALL their taxes on to me when I buy their shit. So what the fuck do I get?

A military that is now broken. An infrastructure that is crumbling. A justice system that favors their own, the rich and the politicians, and if to add insult to injury, herd me like a fucking piece of cattle and actually go out of their way to find a reason to make me pay them for some bullshit slight.

So what the hell is a rational guy supposed to do? What did our forefathers do, when faced with this kind of bogus farce of representation, when bullied into paying for something they don't even want or need?

When a man with a checkbook has greater sway than a million voices, OR EVEN ONE FUCKING VOICE, then hasn't our grievance become that of the founders of this country?

Original Post: http://detroit.craigslist.org/rnr/639254501.html

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