BLAH!!

the concert was friggin awesome.. even though my feet were fucking killing me from wearing 6 inch stilletos and standing in line for four hours... plus another few hours when the doors actually opened... haha.. poor jamie, i was being all moody and mean to her, and it  wasnt even her fault... but besides that the show was fantastic. morrissey is a wonderful performer, artist and poet.

some of the highlights of the night include: moz singing some of my fav songs, the cheese pizza and pretzel that we ate, buying my badass moz shirt!! woot! and lets not forget the kid who got on the stage and was chased down by the fat security guard, but then dodged him and dove back into the crowd! hahaha it was so friggin awesome! that kid had some balls!

ohh ohh oh.. also... the part where the bitch that was behind me tried to make her way to the front thru me and jamie... stupid bitch, chose the wrong way to go haha! i kept pushing her back and elbowing her... and she goes "excuse me". i guess she was expecting me to let her thru, but i just ignored her... so then she tried to push thru again.. and i push her back really hard and she got all pist off.. and yelled right in my ear "excuse me... you dont have to elbow me, im not even doing shit to you" and i turn around and say "well you dont have to try to get in front of me" and she just kept rambling on about me elbowing her... then she goes "how would you like it if i elbowed you" and she did! the nerve!! so at that point, i didnt even think about it.. i just turned around and decked her a good one right in the face! haha. and she kind of fell back and i just like dove across the lawn and tried to grab her. but she kept moving back, so i grabbed her by her hair (" what a girl move.." said jamie lol) and started trying to pull her towards me, and i was still swinging.. then jamie came in between us, and some other dude grabbed the other bitch, and they split us up and a bunch of people came in between where we were standing... but i was still all amped up! and everyone was telling me to calm down.. and not get kicked out for that dumb bitch. lol... it was the best thing ever! lol and i think jamie might have enjoyed that even more than i did! lmao! she couldnt stop laughing and she's still talking about it! lol... haha. so yea... this weekend was fun! viva la moz!!!!

soooo.... i had like the best birhday in history!! weeeee!!! i got my piercings done which was so extreme... my friggin septum was quite painful... and the snakebites were pretty intense also... i got them done in like 5 minutes... when i was done i was so ready to knock out... quite and energy expenditure, oh my brothers... so yea...

the doors at the autolux show opened at seven, but we were there since like 4 or so... which paid off since we were first in line... and WE MET EUGENE GORESHTER!!!! WEEEEEEEE!!! he kept walking around like he wanted attention lol... and jamie was like "is that dude famous or something?" and i looked at i was like flipping out! then he looked at us and i said "hii!!" and he said hi back! then he walked inside... but he kept walking in and out of the venue... so i was like "hey! do you mind taking a pic with us??" and he goes "oh sorry i dont take pictures... not even with my family.. i dont like the way i look" and i was like "but you're so awesome looking!" lol.. so then we asked for his autograph and he said sure... and i didnt have a pen so he got a sharpie from his little back pack. ahhh he was soooo adorable!!! then we had a little conversation about where we were from and how much i love autolux and blah. i was so excited i forgot to mention i saw them with nine inch nails in slo back in 05. but alas... it was the best thing ever!!! then the friggin doors opened and we ran inside... friggin front row... right in front of where eugene was going to be singing! weee!! the first band blew me away man! the pity party. they were awesome. so original... the second band wasnt too impresive... it didnt grab me and shake me.. it was boring and blahhh..but then autolux came to the rescue! omg...they were so amazing! the new shit rocks! and they played my favorite song "here comes everybody". it was the best!!

after that we went to taco bell.. then we went to bed.. cause the next day we got up and went to knotts!! i love my jamie!! she's the most awesome thingie in the world!! i had so much fun with her, even thoguh we're both chicken shits! lol... awww. it was fun! we got to dress up and take western pics. awww we look so cute! lol she was a cowboy and i was a saloon girl. it was the greatest. so yea... my birthday rocked !

two obstacles lying in the middle of this road that i walk. waiting for me to step on them and like mines. go off tearing me apart inside and out.
today i was scared. i was cold. my body frozen with fear. that deep feeling of regret and despair. like when you've pushed someone so much, so far away. to the point where they won't come back. they can't come back. and in all my sickness and helplessness. i only wanted to run back and retrace my steps to hopefully find you there awaiting my return. so that we may pick up the pieces that have chipped and worn off and place them back where they belong. and in the end we will look at this. though it doesn't look the same. and you can see all the cracks and flaws. but im so proud of us. and it all looks beautiful.
without you, im empty. without you, i fall apart.

yep yep...  i just got the nin dvd "beside you in time" its fantastic and i love it. i love nin. i love aaron north. the performances are unrivaled. oh i also got the afi dvd "i heard a voice" which is also yummy. they both kick major asss. i love them!!! AHHH I CANT WAIT TO SEE AFI TOMORROW! less than 24 hrs, if you wanna get technical. but yea... i love my bands