So where to begin?  I mean, it started with me waking up at 4:30 AM on a Saturday morning, all to catch a flight to Vegas for the Leehom Wang concert.  My fabulously awesome boyfriend drove me to the airport at that ridiculous hour, because he's cool and romantic and spoils me like that.  (Plus, he wanted to give me a last minute present of a stack of Christmas cards for every day that I was going to be gone; so cute!!) 

Once in Vegas, my equally cool girls came to pick me up from the airport (they had driven themselves from Colorado, which meant that they had been up all night and were justifiably tired too), from whence we hunted down the nearest Denny's for some breakfast as a method of killing time because it was too early to check into our hotel.  Poor Mel was sick (which, while amusing for us as it resulted in her misreading signs like "Tourist Information" as "Terrorist Information", still sucked for her) so she and I stayed behind in the room to nap while Manda hunted down the Star Trek Experience.  I originally wanted to go with her but I realized I was far too tired to go participate in sci-fi geek awesomeness and the concert and since I'd already bought the concert tickets, the Star Trek Experience will just have to be my top priority on my next Vegas visit.  Darn.  Anyway, we eventually (yes, I'm totally glossing over stuff because I'm tired as I type this) made our way to the concert where the girls got to experience the acutely surreal and often discomfiting situation of being the only white girls in a sea of Asians wondering what the heck we're doing there.  I've had this happen many a time before just going to lunch with my boyfriend and his family, so it probably wasn't quite so disconcerting for me as it was for them, but still...

The first usher to greet us on our arrival promptly asked if we were looking for the Van Halen concert, then wanted to know why we were laughing so hard.  When we finally made it to our seats, the usher there was this sweet older lady who promptly wanted to know how in the world we'd ever gotten ourselves into Mandarin pop and was Leehom any good?  Sheesh.  We instantly assured her that Leehom is fantastic and that our Asian pop obsession was a long, long story. 

Anyway, she seemed enamored of our excitement and rather quirky presence (did I mention that throughout the concert people pointed us out to their friends, talked to us, and even at one point blatantly took our picture?), so she let us in on a little secret: during the performance, Leehom was going to walk right by our seats.  Oh yeah.  It was cool.  And, yes, he did walk by so close that he was easily in arm's distance of me, but, unlike the other fans who jumped out of their seats and mobbed him, I didn't touch the guy because I thought it would be kind of rude...  Apparently I'm lame like that, wanting to respect his personal space and all.  At the end of the concert he told the audience, "Thanks for the hugs and gifts and grabbing... of clothes... and other parts..."  We were thoroughly amused. 

We were also amused when a guy yelled, "Leehom, you're so hot!" And Leehom lisped into the mic, "Stop it.  I'm all sweaty."  Followed by some statement about this ending up in the tabloids tomorrow.  But, yeah.  The point is that the concert was pretty fantastically cool with pyrotechnics and whatnot.  And, seriously, you can't really appreciate how impressive a musician and singer he is until you see him do it all live (seventh row seats on the floor: wonderful view); he's amazing.  You can tell that he practically breathes music. 

I was so bummed when it was all over.  And then I had to get up early for another flight the next morning to Ohio to meet up with family.  Almost missed that one, but miraculously made it onto the plane just before they closed the doors.  However, in the process and frantic running, one of my sister's presents fell out of my bag and was lost.  :(  I had two more for her though, so it wasn't fatal. 

When I reached Ohio, it was snowing.  Beautiful big fat flakes that drifted quietly to the ground.  It was late though after the flight and my layover and the second flight... so I ate dinner and then went to sleep... And woke up on Dec 24th with my family all around me and a Christmas tree to decorate; the ground outside was still white in patches and my grandma's condo smelled of baking cookies and German meatballs. 

My sister and her husband and I strung the lights and wrapped presents.  We set the table while my brother and dad did last minute shopping and my mom made the red kraut and spaetzle.  By the back door, my dad had posted his shopping list: scotch, brandy, [Mom's] presents... 

Uncle Fred and Aunt Ruth (92 years old, don't look a day over 70) joined us for dinner, laughing together in the candlelight sparkling off the crystal and Grandma's best china.  For once, I didn't hear Uncle Fred tell the story of how Jesus bought him, heart and soul, "as is"; like a used car.  I'm kind of sad I missed it, even though I've heard it a dozen times before. 

Later we walked down the road to the church, and after the service we came back and opened presents.  I fell asleep on the red velvet couch in the multicolored glow of the Christmas tree; not as comfortable as it sounds, but six people in a two bedroom condo left little choice, and there's something soothing about the tree lights.  We spent Christmas day, all of us, laughing, talking, and playing games still in our pajamas; loving the fact that we didn't have anywhere to go or be, except with each other.  Everyone pitched in and did the dishes together; in turns, my dad and brother, or me and my mom singing carols together in harmony as we washed and dried.  I probably whined that this condo has no dishwasher, but I still wouldn't trade those carols for the extra time in front of the TV. 

Who would give up raising their voice with their mother in perfect unity of heart and faith and praise?  That's precious.  Magical.  Just like Christmas. 

I hope everyone who reads this was as blessed this year as I was. 

There is this tradition my old church has: every year at Thanksgiving we gather together and take turns sharing what we're thankful for. 

This year I am thankful for the relationship I have with my parents; they're my best friends and I know not many people can say that. 

I am thankful for my sister and the fact that she has just married a man who really loves her. 

I am thankful that I have a Marine for a brother, of whom I can be so very proud.

I am thankful that I have a boyfriend who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread and treats me that way. 

I am thankful that I can have two church families: my new one and the old, where I will always be loved and can always come home to; they are more of a comfort to me than I think they can ever know. 

I am thankful for every stranger who has shown me kindness, who has spoken to my fears and my intentions rather than focused on the foot in my mouth.  Whether you be my Internet acquiantance, the guy next to me on the plane, or the unknown person who smiles at me in passing on the street: thank you.

And I am thankful that even when my life is confused, when my path is shakey, and I feel like I'm alone; God is faithful to be there, to hold my hand and walk beside me, guiding me until the end. 

Ummm... yeah.  I actually almost went to a Rain concert...

I have recently discovered the joy that is The Show with ZeFrank.  It totally and utterly amuses me and here is why:

FictionPress.com is down.  This is pure torture.

So it's four o'clock in the morning right now and I have no idea why I'm awake.  Really, truly no idea.  But I am seriously wide awake.  Which is kind of annoying because I'd much rather be asleep.  But anyway, I've been sitting here thinking -- because that's what you do when you are trying to sleep and can't -- and I've been thinking about what are the things that make people unhappy.  What are the things that steal our joy?  And I've kind of come to this conclusion: the people, ideas, and attributes we choose to focus on are the things that can either add to our joy or steal it completely. 

In general, I'm a pretty joyful person.  There are a lot of people who don't know me very well so they don't see that right away.  They're too busy being intimidated by my quiet nature to notice something that positive about me.  They're focusing on my silence and the fact that they can't tell what I'm thinking or control what I'm thinking and they let that uncertainty steal their joy.  Really, they're focusing on themselves and what I'm saying about them by not saying anything.  What they don't get is that I'm not saying anything about them.  I'm probably not even thinking about them.  Not everything is about them.  People don't bond with my by getting my attention, they bond with me by giving me the space to allow my attention to wander and not being offended by it.  I'm kind of ADHD sometimes.  They really shouldn't be taking it so personally. 

But I'm totally getting off my original topic here.  Because, see, I had something useful to say.  That is, I had something useful to demonstrate.  You see, when I was contemplating this stealing of joy, I was specifically thinking how it is possible for a woman to allow something like a romance story or romantic comedy steal her joy.  Really, nothing this fluffy and light-hearted should leave a woman feeling down.  And yet, I see it happen to women all the friggin time.  Why?  Because of what they're focusing on.  They're always thinking: why can't/don't I have that guy?  Why isn't my relationship like that?  Why am I single?  Where's my romantic hero? 

Okay, first of all: The guy on the screen isn't real.  He's a fantasy.  Let him go.  You do a great disservice to all the good men in the real world if you don't. 

Second of all: When did the story become about you?  How on Earth did you manage to twist what you saw into being about you?  Were you the actress on the screen with him?  Christian women, follow me here for a moment if you want to get out of this rut.  What is the scene that your mind keeps going back to?  You know the one; you replay it in your mind again and again because it makes you sigh every time.  What is the quality the hero is displaying in that scene that makes you long for his attention so much?  For the purposes of this demonstration, let's say tenderness.  He's extremely tender in that scene.  Why is tenderness a good thing?  Don't say "because I like it", that's an unproductive reason.  Tenderness is a virtue.  How do you know?  It says so in the Bible maybe?  How else do you know?  It's a virtue that Christ shows.  How does He show it?  I shouldn't have to list the stories here, that'd be doing too much of the work for you.  Who does He show it to?  Pretty much everyone.  In fact, He showed it to everyone when he died on the cross.  Wow, I guess that even means you.  What other great gifts has He given you? 

Hey, where are your thoughts now?  Where is your joy? 

Don't get me wrong, you're bound to find yourself back at the beginning at some point, but do it again.  Find another virtue; it will lead you to the same conclusion.  It'll take some conscious thought at first but after a while it becomes habit and the joy becomes habitual too. 

Today, on America's got Talent, I got to see David Hasselhoff sing.  It was awesome.  You know what made it even more awesome?  When asked the name of his backup girl singers he answered: "The Hoffettes.  Don't hassel the Hoffettes."  I just about died laughing.

Telling me in your introductory email that you're really quite lonely and you'll settle for anything now, even just an email from me, is going to make you look desperate and not impress me very much.  Just thought you should know that. 

Seriously.  No matter how many times I watch this the opening moments where Vanness talks about being in the shower with pants on totally cracks me up.  Why?  I'm not sure.  Maybe it's because it's the kind of thing I would say were I in his place.  And I would say it with the same expression of "Look at the ridiculous things I am asked to do for my job... I am such a good sport..." 

I love Ambrose Hsu!  I know I'm a dork.