Check out this cool song and sing your heart out!

When I saw one of my favorite REO Speedwagon songs in the list, I had to enter... It's a chance in a million or so I might win, but it was fun to enter!

Looking for a gift for that special man in your life?  Need something personal, something he doesn't already have, something useful?

Your search is over.  Enter the Weener Kleener!  Sized to fit most men, this handy little gadget will get up close and personal to clean your guy's most important appendage...

I bet he doesn't already have one.  :-)

If I ever have my own horse, I will name it ‘Calgon’.

Then I can yell “Calgon, take me awaaaaayyyy” and it will know to break into a gallop when it hears that command.

And I would giggle every time...

Jennifer <-- knows a lot of 1970's commercials...

Amazon.com is giving a free download of Marvin Gaye's 'Let's Get It On' only on Friday (2/13/09) and Saturday (2/14/09) in honor of Valentine's Day!  Click the link to access the free download:  http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B001NTNJD2?tag=jenaraysweb-20

And for those of us less lucky in love this Valentine's Day, enjoy the ultimate break-up song of all time, by Weird Al Yankovic.  It's twisted and wrong, but it never fails to make me laugh, even on the heels of a fresh break-up.  You have to love the sappy way Weird Al sings all these vile things...  LOL

Sorry, no free download on this one, but you can watch the video at YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XAXutCG2h9E

It's a lot better if you know the lyrics:

One More Minute
Weird Al Yankovic

Aahh....

Well I heard that you're leavin' (leavin')
Gonna leave me far behind (so far behind)
'Cause you found a brand new lover
You decided that I'm not your kind (aahh..)

So I pulled (I pulled) your name out (name out) of my Rolodex (oohh..)
And I tore all your pictures in two
And I burned down the malt shop where we used to go
Just because it reminds me of you (dippity dippity doo)

That's right (that's right) you ain't gonna see me cryin'
I'm glad (I'm glad) that you found somebody new
'Cause I'd rather spend eternity eating shards of broken glass
Than spend one more minute with you

I guess I might seem kinda bitter
You got me feeling down in the dumps
'Cause I'm stranded all alone in the gas station of love
And I have to use the self-service pumps

Oh, so honey, let me help you with that suitcase
You ain't (you ain't) gonna break my heart in two
'Cause I'd rather get a hundred thousand paper cuts on my face
Than spend one more minute with you

I'd rather rip out my intestines with a fork
Than watch you going out with other men
I'd rather slam my fingers in a door (yah)
Again and again and again and again and again

Oh, can't you see what I'm tryin' to say, Darlin...

I'd rather have my blood sucked out by leeches (leeches)
Shove an icepick under a toenail or two
I'd rather clean all the bathrooms in Grand Central Station with my tongue
Than spend one more minute with you

Yes, I'd rather jump naked on a huge pile of thumbtacks
Or stick my nostrils together with crazy glue
I'd rather dive into a swimming pool filled with double-edged razor blades
Than spend one more minute with you

I'd rather rip my heart right out of my ribcage with my bare hands
and then throw it on the floor and stomp on it 'till I die...
*Squeak!*
Than spend one more minute with you

When a man calls himself an idiot, you should listen to him.  He's probably not kidding.

Not long ago, a man told me he was an idiot.  Naively, I assumed he was apologizing for past mistakes.  Looking back now, it seems he was warning me about the way he would treat me in the future.

Another lesson learned the hard way...  As Richard Marx sang in the eighties, I shoulda known better...

For years I’ve meant to stop in this little wine and art bar not far from my office.  Today I visited the website for Rumours Wine & Art Bar and found that they happen to have a wine tasting every other Wednesday night.  Now wouldn’t you just know that tonight happened to be one of those tastings!  J  So of course I took that as a sign that I had to go…

The wine tasting was from 5-8 and I arrived about 5:30pm.  Tonight they had a selection of four of their favorite winter red wines.  Red just happens to be my favorite for wine. 

I was greeted by no less than three of their employees almost immediately upon entering the building.  I was also welcomed by the wine distributor who was there to serve the wine and talk about the different vintages in detail.

I have to say, I loved the atmosphere and the welcome.  Everyone was so friendly and warm, both employees and customers.  It’s the kind of place where no one really feels like a complete stranger.  The building is tiny from the outside, but inside it simply feels intimate.  Very nice.

For such a small place, they boast a very nice, extensive wine selection.  I’m definitely going to have to go back with a friend soon so I can try some of the interesting selections that are only offered by the bottle.  I love wine, but drinking a whole bottle by myself isn’t really an option…  They have a lot of wines by the glass, though, so a customer like me isn’t out of luck.  And of course if you go on the evening of a wine tasting, even better.  The tastings run approximately $20 and you get about a third of a glass of four different wines to taste.  Once you’ve completed the fleet of wines offered in the tasting, you get a full glass of your favorite from the offerings.

I met some really nice people there, both customer and employees and can’t wait to go back soon!  Even if it weren’t for the company, I would go back just for the food and the wine.  They have a small but interesting menu, and have daily specials.  Although the regular menu had several intriguing items, I opted for the pork dish on the specials menu today.  It was tender, with just the right hint of spice, and was served atop a square of potato gratin (thinly sliced potatoes baked with parmesan cheese, I think), asparagus, and a green salad made with mesclun mix – my favorite salad green.  The food tasted amazing.

The service was fabulous and attentive long after the warm welcome and I could have stayed all night, except I had to drive home and I have an early morning staff meeting at work tomorrow.  Dangit.  I will definitely be back for another wine tasting at Rumours Wine & Art Bar soon, though!

Rumours Wine & Art Bar has two locations in the Nashville area – the one I visited on 12^th Avenue this evening and another in East Nashville on Woodland Street.  Check their website for hours of operation and complete addresses. Oh, and don’t forget to sign up for their newsletter!  Website:  http://www.rumourswinebar.com/

Eighteen years ago, I gave birth to my daughter, who I gave to another family for adoption.  I’ve never met her or her parents, but I think of them constantly, especially on her birthday, January 30.

The decision was a hard one to make, but it was the right one for everyone concerned.  That doesn’t stop me loving her and thinking of her constantly.  More difficult were the years when I had to keep her existence a secret.  Once I was able to open up about it, it has been far easier to deal with my decision.

Unfortunately, there are so many who cannot be open about their own situation.  For them, as much as for myself and my daughter, I have written an open letter to my child for the last few years and posted it on my blog.  She may never see these letters, but if they can help another child who has been adopted, another birth mother dealing with the pain of missing her child, or the adopted family who possibly wonder about the woman who gave them their most treasured blessing, then the writing of these letters is more than worthwhile.

I’ve posted this year’s letter for her birthday today.  If you are interested in the topic, you can find it here:  http://blog.jenaray.com/?p=326. 

Thanks for listening.

You may think that your own happiness is out of your control.  You might feel lost, your emotional state subject to the various events in your life and maybe even the whims of those people around you.

But for the most part, you can choose to be happy.  Sounds easy for me to say, doesn’t it?  But it is true – I’m living proof.

If you wrote my life story, it would read like one of the most depressing Lifetime movies.  I was switched at birth, run over by a car when I was a child, abandoned by both my biological father and later the father who adopted me, gave my only child up for adoption when she was born, lost my home and everything in it during Hurricane Opal, etc., etc.

That’s some sob story, huh?  But I don’t remember every feeling like I had a bad life, even during the worst of times.  While certain events may have made me sad at the time or even perhaps depressed, those emotions were fleeting, never consuming my life.

I come from a family of people who laugh in the face of adversity.  Truly.  We probably aren’t the most politically correct family, but we find it cathartic to laugh together through the worst of times – especially when the only other option seems to be crying.

I’ve learned to look for the good things in my life, count the blessings – especially when the bad stuff threatens to overload me.  You know what?  I’ve never had trouble finding something positive in my life.  It may be something small, but that one thing may be the touchstone I need in that moment to keep me from immersing into the sadness and reaffirm that God loves me.

Some people think that I am always happy, and while that is true a lot of the time, I do have my moments. 

This week, for instance, is my daughter’s birthday.  I knew before she was born that God intended her for another family who couldn’t have a baby themselves, and I have never doubted that decision.  That doesn’t mean I don’t wish that circumstances hadn’t been considerably different at the time.  I miss my daughter terribly, even if I never saw her.  I have always loved her.

So the week of her birthday is an emotional one for me, although I think of her every day.  The day of her birth reminds me of everything in her life that I have missed, makes me wonder what her life is like now, hoping that she had every advantage I couldn’t have given her.

And if something happens to make me upset right now, it is harder than normal for me to pull out of that funk.  It’s easy for me to spiral into a depression during this time.

How do I deal with that?  I plan things during this time that keep me occupied.  I surround myself with people I love and trust to deliver positivity and cheer.  That positive energy does wonders to counter any bad feelings that I may have and helps me through what is the toughest week of the year for me.

It makes me absolutely heartbroken when I see people who don’t know how to grab happiness for themselves.  I want everyone to understand how easy it is to find it – they just have to look for it and choose it.  Count the small blessings – you would be surprised how many of them you have in your life.  Don’t depend on big events to make you happy – those can be few and far between.  It’s those small daily miracles that are really the fabric of life.

Another thing that helps is to do things for others.  It always makes me feel good to do something for someone else with no expectations of reciprocation. 

Smile at a stranger – you never know when a simple smile will change that person’s day.  Compliment someone on something – earrings, hair style, the color they are wearing, whatever.  Perform a random act of kindness somehow, no matter how small.  The good energy you send out will come back to you.  Maybe not in that exact moment, but it will be returned. 

And if you know that you are acting from a place of goodness and love, then how can you regret any kindness?

I wish all of you the best.  I hope you find joy and peace in your life – enough at least that it helps balance those hard times when they roll around, because they are bound to.

Remember that the trials in our lives are for a reason.  They make us stronger, they set us on a path, whatever.  If you have faith, then you know there is a plan and we don’t always know what that plan is.  We just have to trust God and make the most of the blessings in our lives.

Listen to your intuition.  Face your fear. Both are great advice.  But what do you do when the two are in conflict with each other?

You know those moments – you can’t quite tell if your intuition is really ringing alarms or not?  Especially when it is concerning a situation you know causes you some amount of trepidation already.

It can be a tricky thing to weed through the available signs to discern whether your fear is a warranted concern or whether it is the product of worried overreaction. 

Ignoring that niggling feeling that something is off, however, can lead to considerable distress if the truth finally reveals your intuition to be on target.

Complicate that with those times when you want your intuition to be wrong, and it can be even more difficult to wade through the facts and fears to find the truth.

Giving it patience and time are often the best course of action but this is often the most difficult solution to abide.  Knowing a truth doesn’t always make it easier.  I’m still learning.

The rain is pouring right now, and I went out to pick up a to-go order for lunch, having a craving for my favorite Caribbean Barbecue Rotisserie Chicken with black beans and sweet potatoes...  But I digress...

While en route to the restaurant, I found myself rather annoyed at another motorist who neglected to turn their headlights on even though the rain is pouring.

Then I noticed MINE weren't on.  I am usually so good about turning them on in the rain - it's turning them off once I've parked that is my problem.  But there I was, driving without my headlights.

So I felt bad about being annoyed with the other driver.  Maybe they just forgot this once too.  I guess it can happen to any of us... 

This is me, ashamed and reminded to have a little more tolerance...

When your massage therapist suggests you use a safe word with him, you get the feeling the massage will be pretty intense!

That’s what happened to me tonight.  I went for a long overdue massage and had a new guy this time – at least he was new to me.  So of course we talked about what I liked, where my problem areas are, etc. beforehand.

When he learned I like the Firm Swedish massage and that I ask for male masseuses  because they are typically stronger and can apply more pressure he suggested that I pick a ‘safe word’ in case he was too hard on me.  We settled on simply using the word ‘stop’ and he also said he would probably be able to tell by the way I was breathing and also if I tensed up.

It’s funny, though.  I read a lot of BDSM romances and learned about something called ‘subspace’ where the submissive enters a state where they are kind of floating, aware but feel somewhat outside of themselves.  I get that way during a good massage.  If a massage therapist is doing a good job, that is. 

The first time I had a professional massage a few years back, I was a little nervous.  I had heard that they are very careful of keeping the private areas of your body covered with the sheet at all times, but was still a little worried that an accident might happen and I’d end up all shy , embarrassed and tense from it.

I needn’t have worried.  Not only are they really good at keeping you covered, but about 15 minutes into that massage I entered that relaxed euphoria and realized that I didn’t give a flying leap if he wanted to yank the covers completely off of me.  Seriously.   At that point, I felt so damn good I didn’t care what he did to me as long as those magic hands kept doing their job.

The next day when I thought about that feeling, I thought that must be what ‘subspace’ feels like, or at least a little close to it.

Tonight when my masseur assured me he would be able to tell if I was OK by paying attention to my breathing and body tension, I once again thought how similar this activity is to the BDSM relationships I’ve read about.  A good Dom, as I understand it, must be totally aware of his sub’s state, using the same sort of signals to tell what state of mind the sub is in.

At least that’s how I imagine it must be…  I might be reading too many novels, though!  LOL