 |
originally printed 03.03.05 in the Eureka, California newspaper The Times-Standard.
Constantine
Durant: Somebody doesn't want me to see this movie. I tried to watch this movie two weeks in a row now, and something keeps popping up. Last week it was scheduling, this week I apparently had the wrong pass. Maybe it's a subconscious thing, I mean, I'm not the biggest Keanu Reeves fan. I had to be strapped into a chair to watch "The Matrix." So, sorry, but I'm not going to work this hard to see a Keanu movie.
Rating: N/A
Faulk: High marks for visual power, and a low grade for dramatic content. Keanu Reeves - playing the same surfer dude he perfected in the late 1980s with Bill and Ted and who he has played ever since - does nothing to stretch his portfolio here. The director of this film comes from a career of making music videos, and you can tell: There's a real lack of prolonged plot development and an abundance of raucous music. Still, I found it slightly entertaining with Reeves - as always - being the overachieving stoner you can't help but root for.
Rating: L
Cursed
Durant: There should be a place in a movie theater where people who leave their cell phones on and carry out conversations during a movie have to sit, like an NHL penalty box, and the rest of the crowd gets to line up and smack them in the face with whatever implement the deem neccessary. Like that scene in "Airplane" when the rest of the plane lines up to calm down the hysterical woman. This happened when I saw "Cursed." There were about five people in the entire theater and the phone rings with this woman, who decided to sit right behind me. "Hello? I'm watching a movie right now. 'Cursed.' Where are you? Really? No, I don't have my medication. I don't know, an hour or so. OK. Really? No way. OK. OK. OK. OK. I love you." This conversation has been burned into my brain. I know, I should have said something, but then I wouldn't have anything to write about except the movie. Oh yeah, the movie. It was better than I thought it would be and purposely funny at times, which is rare for a horror flick.
Rating: L
Faulk: I had no hope for this movie going in: Wes Craven has left me craving lots with his usually ridiculous horror movies. He's apparently seen the light, because in this movie he recognizes the inherent stupidity right off the bat and makes use of it, ala "Scary Movie." The result is a fun film that still manages to make you jump in your seat. Werewolves as a premise leave a lot to be desired - hairy beasts running rampant can be seen too easily in such mundane locales as the Arcata Plaza - so why not embrace the flaws of the chosen genre and just make it funny? Now what's hilarious to some can be offensive to others if the joke is directed at something they hold way too sacred, as the Fat Guys have learned. So, to all horror film afficianados - or other bearers of aesthetic burdens - please chill out. You have your opinions, and we don't.
Rating: L
DVD
I ♥ Huckabees
Durant: If this movie wasn't a movie, would it still be as good as it was? Or would there be another movie in its place? If this movie was a house plant, would it be a healthy house plant? OK, I'll stop, but it's questions like these that make you have to watch this movie at least twice, preferably back to back, to get and enjoy it. The first time I watched it I was in the midst of my three-day one man wake to Hunter S. Thompson, and that frame of mind doesn't work well with a movie like this. The ensemble is great: Dustin Hoffman, Lily Tomlin, Mark Wahlberg, Jude Law and one of my most favoritist actors Jason Schwartzman. The movie is funny on a number of different levels and the short floating square scenes are great.
Rating: XL
Faulk: A baby was born, and while that had nothing to do with me leaving said DVD on my desk under six inches of paper, it makes a convenient excuse. When matronly waters pour forth, what's a movie really worth? By the way, congratulations to Maggie and Shane on the birth of their big and beautiful baby boy Finnigan. May he put the whipper in your snapper.
Rating: 10 pounds 5 ounces
7:00 AM
Powered by  | | English | | Albanian | | Arabic | | Bulgarian | | Catalan | | Chinese | | Croatian | | Czech | | Danish | | Dutch | | Estonian | | Filipino | | Finnish | | French | | Galician | | German | | Greek | | Hebrew | | Hindi | | Hungarian | | Indonesian | | Italian | | Japanese | | Korean | | Latvian | | Lithuanian | | Maltese | | Norwegian | | Polish | | Portuguese | | Romanian | | Russian | | Serbian | | Slovak | | Slovenian | | Spanish | | Swedish | | Thai | | Turkish | | Ukrainian | | Vietnamese |
|